REPOST. FIC: One Day At A Time. Growing Up Part 1.

Title:One Day At A Time

Author:RiteRaith

E-Mail:mrains@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Content:B/W, mention of Spike/Angel(not graphic)

Rating:PG-13

Disclaimer:Joss and Mutant Enemy own the characters. I don't get anything from this except fun.

Distribution:Distribute to whoever and wherever you like. I ask only that if anyone wants to archive it they let me know.

Spoilers: Up To but not including New Moon Rising.

Feedback:I would appreciate constructive criticism just as much as praise.

Story Summary:Buffy comes out. She doesn't get a good reception.

Author’s Note:This story is dedicated to Jamie, thank you, you’re a wonderful friend.

One Day At A Time

Buffy was more certain than ever that she was in love with Willow, the redhead was the joy in her life. It was early in the morning in Sunnydale, the deep black of the night still waiting for the dawn’s bright rays to banish it. Buffy sat in her seat at the Espresso Pump staring into her coffee, she was trying not to cry, she was trying even harder not to feel because all she could feel was her love for Will..... . Before that thought was finished a solitary tear rolled down her cheek. What had happened to turn her life upside down so quickly? It had all begun the previous night.........

Buffy had finished her patrol and now she headed back towards her house,her old house in Sunnydale as she now roomed with Willow on campus, she had made her decision, her friends would be gathered their as she had asked them to, she would tell them tonight. As she reached her door she gathered all her courage and she hoped her friends would understand her, she opened the door. Buffy was greeted with a perfectly normal scene, Xander, Anya and Willow were in the front room watching television. Giles was sitting in an armchair reading a book and her mother was getting drinks for everyone whilst trying to avoid Giles, after the Band Candy incident they had barely spoken. That was when someone stepped from the shadows behind Buffy and tapped her on the shoulder. Buffy was so worked up by what she was about to tell her friends that the tap on her shoulder was enough to make her scream. Everyone noticed her now and the figure stepped into the light, it was Spike. “All right Slayer no need to burst my ear drums, what’s wrong with you you’re jumpy tonight, bad patrol, huh, I can relate.” Buffy noticed his mud encrusted trench coat. Spike took the remaining sofa and stretched out using his trench coat as a blanket.

Buffy walked into the front room and took the last remaining free seat, Spike looked asleep. Joyce Summers entered the front room, handed out the drinks and was about to leave when Buffy asked her to stay, she did and stood in the corner facing her daughter. Giles put down his book, Spike opened an eye and Buffy noticed her friends worried expressions on there faces. She took a deep breath and said “I gathered you here today because there’s something I’ve got to tell you.......”

“Did you find a new demon?” Giles asked.

“Is it the apocalypse again Buffy?” Xander ventured.

“What is it Buffy?” Willow inquired.

“Shut up and let her talk!” A half asleep Spike yelled from the couch.

“No it’s nothing Slayer-wise..........”

Buffy took another deep breath and said

“It’ssomethingcompletelypersonalandIhavenoideahowtotellyouguysthatI’ve beenthinkingandIthinkI’mGay!”

Buffy inhaled again and lookedlike she was about to collapse. Due to his vampiric hearing Spike was the only one the room who had understood what Buffy had babbled. He sat up, his trench coat flopping onto the floor “Bloody hell......” Was all he muttered as he looked at Buffy, curiosity in his eyes. “Pardon Buff but you sounded like Blur then and I can’t understand him, even now.” Xander stated.

Buffy looked Willow straight in the eyes, after all she was in love with Willow, this was why she was coming out, and said simply, meekly

“I’m Gay.”

Anya looked Buffy in the eyes and said

“So you are going to admit it then......”

Xander looked shocked and with venom in his voice stated

“First you wouldn’t date living guys, now you’re forsaking my whole gender? Bitch!”

Xander stood and ran from Buffy’s house, Anya following him, promising to beat some sense into him.

Joyce fainted and Giles ran to her side, trying to wake her and Willow, her reason for living, Willow just looked hurt.

Buffy started to cry and she ran from the house. She spent the next three hours wandering Riverside park in the rain, the heaven’s tears mingling with her own on her face. Eventually it became too cold even for her and that was when she saw the still open Espresso Pump.

She had spent the next few hours sitting there thinking nursing only twocups of coffee over three hours. That brought her back to now. She was so crushed that they had not understood, worse that her love for Willow was not reciprocated, that she was once again considering running.

She was shocked when she looked up from her coffee and her thoughts to notice Spike sitting next to her. She was about to bolt when she felt his arm on her shoulder and heard him say quietly

“I understand Buffy, It’s okay.”

She relaxed into the hug Spike offered her and she whispered

“Thank you.”

in his ear. Spike smiled at her and asked her if she wanted to walk and talk. Buffy accepted and found herself wandering Riverside park again with barelytwo hours to sunrise having a meaningful conversation with a Vampire that untilnow she had thought an uneducated pig.

“So you decided that you’re only interested in your own gender then?”

Spike asked tentatively.

“Yes, I mean, I think so, I mean there is someone.........”

Buffy responded shyly.

“Who?”

inquired Spike.

“You first. You tell me why you are behaving reasonably and sanelyand accepting me.”

Buffy stated boldly.

Spike took a deep breath and began to explain

“Okay. Okay. Two shocks coming. Firstly I’m.........”

Spike hesitated and Buffy frowned at him

“Okay, okay. Firstly I’m............. Bi.”

Buffy looked up at him, clearly shocked but Spike carried on

“Secondly, the only male I’ve ever loved is a name you don’t want to hear.....”

Buffy looked at his face and whispered

“Angel.......”

“Angelus........”

Spike finished wiping a blood tear from his eye.

“I’m over him now, really,”

Spike said shakily

“I had to be after he vanished that night in Rumania but then I did love him with my heart, body and....”

Spike began to laugh as he realised the last word in that phrase was soul.

Buffy looked up at him, concerned and Spike stopped laughing, resuming his talk

“So basically I understand somewhat what you’re going through and I also understand why you had to come out, I’m sorry it went so badly for you.”

As Spike finished Buffy half smiled pleased someone could relate to whatshe was going through. Spike nodded, indicating it was Buffy’s turn to share. She looked him in the eyes and said, simply

“I’m in love with Willow.”

Spike looked at Buffy and nodded before asking

“So what are you gonna’ do?”

Buffy gave her honest response

“I think I’m gonna leave town, at least till’ I get myhead sorted........”.

Spike nodded, not surprised,

“Keep in touch yeah? I can’t speak for the others but I willworry about you.”

Spike smiled, then reaching into his jacket withdrew five hundred dollar bills and pressed them into the inside pocket on Buffy’s coat as he leant in to hug her.

“Good luck and please write, yeah?”

Spike asked. Buffy broke the hug and looked up at him

“I promise I’ll write and Spike,”

he smiled at her

“Yeah?”

Buffy finished

“Thank you for caring.”.

Buffy then turned and began to run to catch a bus back to campus to get her things.

Spike took off in the opposite direction.

Willow was more certain than ever that she was in love with Buffy, for it was Buffy who saved her and it was Buffy who had been her first, only, true friend. It had begun like any other evening, the gang waiting for Buffy to get backfrom patrol to tell them about some big threat, that’s what it had to be, Willow didn’t dare to hope for .............. something else.

Buffy had come home and tried to tell them something important. When she finally did. Everything had gone mad. It had been barely seconds since Buffy had ran out and Willow was so angry Buffy had not told her first, privately andyet it awakened a hope within Willow, perhaps they could be together......? Willow began to cry, tears of pure happiness and frustration at the same time.

Spike got up, grabbed a spare coat, walked back into the living room andsaid “You people make me sick! She trusts you enough to lower all her defences, show you her pure heart, and you stick a knife in it!” Spike was almost atthe front door when Willow asked “Where are you going?” Spike looked at Willow and, his face pure sincerity, said in a low whisper “Someone has to comfort her.” He left the house, slamming the door loudly in his wake, not noticing the tears rolling down Willow’s face.

Willow had helped Giles get Joyce to bed and then she had fallen into an uneasy fitful sleep on the couch in the front room, Giles having taken the chair by Joyce’s bed.

She awoke to an angry banging on Buffy’s front door, according to her watch it had been about seven hours since Buffy had stormed out, she was very worried about Buffy as she, she lov.............

Her thoughts were interrupted as Buffy’s front door flew off it’s hinges and Spike stormed into the front room.

“Willow this is about Buffy and IT IS BLOODY IMPORTANT!”

He yelled as he grabbed her and lifted her over his shoulder to run fromthe house to his car. He placed Willow in the passenger side of his 1969 Black DeSoto before diving into the drivers side and making like hell for the university campus.

Willow finally plucked up the nerve to speak

“Spike what’s going on? What’s happened to Buffy?”

Spike relaxed and began to drive slower

“Willow I have to know,are you Gay?”.

Willow looked shocked “I mean, I don’t know, I’m not sure, I mean.........”

Spike looked at her his voice concerned

“Willow, are you Gay.”

Willow looked Spike in the eyes and barely whispered

“Yes!”.

Spike smiled and visibly relaxed.

“What does this have to do with Buffy?”

Willow asked.

Spike looked at her, his voice full of sincerity and spoke softly

“She’s in love with you.”

Willow began to cry and smiled mumbling

“She loves me... ....”.

Spike sounded pleased

“I take it the feeling is mutual then.......”

Willow nodded happily.

“Don’t be overcome with joy just now, we ain’t out of the woods yet Peaches...........”

Spike said his voice suddenly grave. On the drive to the University Spike brought Willow up to speed just as dawn was breaking..................

Buffy had caught the first that bus she found and had been packing solidly for forty minutes, the part of her brain that was functioning had just noticed the sunrise. She grabbed Mr Gordo and stuffed him into her rucksack, zipping it closed she hefted the heavy pack onto her back. She grabbed her two suitcases and headed towards the door, which was suddenly flung open. Standing there Buffy saw the one thing she would allways want but could never have. She dropped the suitcases.

“Willow there’s something I have to tell you.................”

Concern spread across Willow’s face “Buffy I know...............you love me.”

“How do you know..............”

Willow looked scared “Spike told me.....................”

“I should never have trusted him.........”

Willow looked gravely serious “No it’s okay Buffy, really, he told me because I told him.......................”

“What is it Will?”

Willow took a deep, long breath said with complete sincerity “Buffy, I’m, I’m Gay and I love you!”

Willow could not believe what Spike had said about Buffy’s plans and the second they had arrived she had run straight tothe dorms with Spike ahead of her, just dodging the sunrise. She had reached the dormand flung the door open to be confronted by Buffy, her true love, her reason to exist, about to run away. Buffy dropped the suitcases.

“Willow there’s something I have to tell you.................”

“Buffy I know...............you love me.”

Buffy looked shocked “How do you know..............”

“Spike told me.....................”

Buffy looked like she was about to cry “I should never have trusted him.........”

“No it’s okay Buffy, really, he told me because I told him.......................”

Concern spread over Buffy’s face “What is it Will?”

“Buffy, I’m, I’m Gay and I love you!”

As Buffy tried to comprehend this Willow leaned forwards and kissed Buffy longingly, deeply and with love. Buffy returned the kiss with just as much love. “Will what are we going to do?” Buffy asked, worried. “Don’t worry Buffy it will be okay, we’ll just have to take things one day at a time.” Willow smiled and kissed Buffy again.

Spike watched the whole scene from the hall through the open door to the girl’s dorm. He left, smiling and thinking if those girls could succeed, maybe he should drop in on his sire...........................

The End