FIC: My Time in Sunnydale (1/?)

[Patrick Kelly <bandits@xxxxxxxxx>]

Title: My Time in Sunnydale (1/???)
Author: Pat Kelly
Rating: PG-13
Summary: I've done it. I put myself in Sunnydale. I just started writing last night, and I
couldn't stop. I must be crazy for posting this, and I'm not even sure if you guys'll like
it. It's weird for me to be writing myself. Especially in the first person.
Disclaimer: Joss and Mutant Enemy only. I do not own..
No money is being made. But I do own myself, so don't even try to steal me!

Part 1
--------------------------------
I walked through the streets of Sunnydale, somehow knowing I was being chased by vampires.
I was probably the quickest kill they'd ever have, being on crutches and all. I figured
that screaming or trying to increase my pace wouldn't do me any good, so I just waited for
the inevitable to happen.

A purely morbid part of me wondered what it would feel like; having my blood slowly
drained from my body. Death was the ultimate mystery. Would I get a free pass to my
personal heaven because of the way my life was taken from me? Well I was about to find
out. I ended up standing outside the under construction multiplex, knowing the vampires
weren't afraid of killing me out in the open.

I found myself looking around for any spectators. Some would run, I knew, but there were
those other sickos who would watch with fascination. Then high tail it just before the
feeding ended. But the street was deserted. Apparently the residents were a little smarter
than I thought. Surprising the vampires who thought they were sneaking up on me, I turned
around to face them.

They growled with hunger. Seeing their fangs, their feral eyes, their twisted smiles, I
finally felt the fear most victims must have felt before me. But I stood defiantly.

"Look at the brave four legger boys." The one I guessed was the leader said.

As they came closer to me, the intense desire not to die kicked in. I had subdued it
before, thinking death would be an adventure, a welcome release. But then I remembered how
much I liked breathing. With this new attitude, I did something less than intelligent.

"You like my crutches? Want a closer look?" I asked them with a smug smile. Boy, was I
being an idiot.

I saw that my left crutch was placed just in line with the leader's groin area, and
without thinking, I aimed for his undead genitals and scored a direct hit. He grabbed his
hurt package, and his two buddies proceeded to get revenge. They ripped my crutches off my
arms, and threw them across the street.

I had experience with falling to the ground, and I landed on my hands and knees with
minimal pain. Minimal, but it was still concrete. The leader recovered, and picked me up
by the back of my shirt. I felt weightless. I flailed helplessly, and then he threw me so
I could join my crutches. If you're ever prey for vampires, take this advice.

Don't piss them off. You're just making things worse for yourself.

I knew it was close to over now. They were still hungry, and anger only increases a
vampire's appetite. My vision was blurry, and they were standing over me. I didn't even
see them move across the street. Then they were on me. The lackeys sank their teeth into
both my wrists, and I felt the leader turn my head. But the feeling of fangs puncturing
the flesh of my neck never came.

My blood was no longer being drained from my body. There were only growls and sounds of
bones breaking. I felt dust shower down on me, choking as it entered my mouth. One of them
had died. Only one person could have killed it, and I knew the other two were going to
join it. I also knew I was going to live.

I was very grateful to her for it. I didn't think she was going to show, but I should have
expected it. I was weak from the bloodloss I had sustained, and movement was an issue. I
felt her crouch over me. The danger was gone. She was checking my injuries, and she felt
for my pulse. I was alive.

But when I found my voice, I didn't thank for that. I said the first thing that came to my
mind.

"What kept you?"

She smirked at me, even though I could tell she was worried about the snacking wounds the
vampires left on my wrists. I had never seen her this close before. Stunning was the only
word I could think of. I had much respect for her. She had survived everything placed in
her way, and still kept going forward. She was an amazing girl. No, she was a woman now.
She deserved happiness. She deserved bliss. But the problem was, no one was worthy of her,
least of all me. And I had no delusions of even attempting to try.

Her voice brought me back. "You're welcome. Now what're we gonna do? Hospital sounds good
to me."

I shook my head. "Don't like hospitals."

"You and me both. But see, I can get away with cuts like yours. I heal real fast. You lost
a good amount of blood."

"How do my crutches look?"

I watched her turn her head. When she looked back at me, it wasn't with a pleasant
expression.

"Pretty bent. Destroyed would probably be a better word." She was quiet. I guess she was
thinking about what to do. "It's the year of the double zeroes. You'd think I'd invest in
a cell-phone."

She sighed, and lifted my right arm up. I knew the time for moving had come, and I wasn't
looking forward to it. "Be gentle?" I asked.

"Like a feather. Promise. A friend of mine lives a few blocks from here. He'll bandage
you, then you're going to the hospital. Can you walk if I -?"

I nodded, and she put her one arm around my shoulders, her other one around my waist. It
took me a minute to get my legs cooperating, and then we were off. Slowly, but we were
off.

***

We reached her friend's house. He was a man I knew well. He too had survived many
tragedies. Most in a past I only knew an inkling of. Had endured both physical and
emotional pain, and he didn't even have supernatural abilities. I had as much respect for
him, as I had for her. No more, no less. He had had to make tough choices, and was a man
was a great amount of compassion, knowledge, and character.

When he saw me, he instinctively knew to help her bring me in. They set me down on the
couch, and he went into his kitchen, I assumed to get whatever necessary bandage and
disinfectant supplies necessary to temporarily heal me until the hospital. She followed
him and they talked quietly, once an awhile looking at me, and then going back to speaking
with each other.

They stopped, and he knelt down by me, and I held out my wrists. First came the cold
disinfectant cream, and I winced at the feeling of clashing temperatures hitting the
wound. He cleaned away the blood, and then I felt the pain which, up until now, the shock
had held in check. I was surprised that two small holes, and I do mean small, could hurt
that much. He started the bandaging.

"You're a very lucky young man." He told me.

"You think I don't know that?" I asked.

"Well, I suppose you do. May I ask you what your name is?"

"Pat." I said. "And yours?" Even though I already knew it.

She interjected. "He's just Giles. And I'm Buffy. I slay vampires."

"Really?" I asked with mock surprise.

She grinned widely. "So Pat, I don't remember seeing you before."

How was I supposed to do this? "That's cause I'm not usually out at night."

"Any particular reason you chose to be out tonight?" Giles asked.

As he switched to my other wrist, he brushed up against my knee, and I hissed. He looked
at me, silently asking what had caused the pain.

"They're just scraped," I assured him, and then got back to his question. "I don't know.
Boredom? I guess I always wanted to see if vampires could be hurt in their lower regions."

Buffy gaped. "You didn't." When I didn't say anything, I got to see angry Buffy up close
and personal. "What could you possibly -?"

Giles cleared his throat, and I prayed in thanks for him stopping her impending tirade.

"You can reprimand him later, Buffy, but what he needs now is professional medical care.
Do you have family we would call for you?"

"Yeah, but they're nowhere near here."

They both stared at me for a minute, as if waiting for an explanation. Seeing that I
wasn't going to give them one, Buffy finally said something.

"Well I don't want to leave you there by yourself, but there's no way I'm staying
overnight. I'll call my friend Willow. She won't mind."

"I don't want to put anybody out." I said, not really putting up much of an argument.

"You're not."

She picked up the phone, and then Giles was lifting me off the couch. We were headed out
to the car. I had many objects to my current position, the biggest one being that I didn't
enjoy being this dependent on others, but I kept silent.


***

I laid in the hospital bed, looking around the room. Every hospital room, in every
hospital, no matter what state, is always identical. A bed, a non-working twenty year old
TV, and it always feels the same. Cold and impersonal. It was nothing new to me. I had had
IV's in my arm before, nurses coming in and never giving me a moment's peace, never
letting me move, giving me blood&the only difference this time was that I didn't have
casts and it was only a one night stay.

But a hospital bed was better than riding in Giles' Citrogen. It felt like a billion
mini-earthquakes. I was happy to have survived the horror. And in case you're wondering,
I'm not exaggerating.

I had insisted on the short stay, and the doctors didn't argue. They needed all the space
for patients they could get. Around about the third time I counted the 123 tiles on my
side of the room, it was really late and I wasn't expecting any visitors. But then, Willow
poked her head in the room, being quiet just in case I was asleep. I smiled at her, and
she came in, gently closing the door behind her. She was carrying a balloon and a small
teddy bear.

Only Willow.

The redhead had changed a lot, but had also remained very much the same. Seeing her in
person now, it was hard not to smile when she was in the room. It was like her presence
had forced the hospital room to seem more cheerful and me as well. She certainly was one
of a kind, and I hoped she never lost her uniqueness. I couldn't even grasp it now. I was
a fool to even assume I could guess what made her tick.

She made the controversial changing of sexual orientations seem so effortless, and not
even that big of a deal. You couldn't define this girl. There weren't enough words in the
dictionary. She was simply Willow, and you were drawn to her. I know I was. She loved
every person that crossed her path, not judging them by appearances, and most people tried
to be as good as she hoped they were. The ones that weren't good, she still tried to help.
How extraordinary is that?

And the people she felt affection for on a deeper level, well, I was extremely envious of
them. Could they even appreciate how lucky they were? I knew I was lucky just being in the
same room with her. That made me feel special, and also undeserving. But that didn't mean
that I wasn't going to enjoy every moment of time she chose to spend with me. Because I
was. When would I ever get this chance again?

"Hi there." She said to me with a wave. "Sorry I took forever. I was down at the gift
shop, and they told me they were closed, and then I had to fight with them, and then some
nurse told me visiting hours were over and then -"

I had to chuckle. "You didn't have to go through all that trouble."

"It was no trouble. And yes I did. I'm a firm believer in gifts. They must be given.
Especially with you being attacked and all. Shudder." She said, and then she actually did
shudder. "I know what a big, un-fun that is."

"Well, I appreciate the bear." It was oddly very comforting. "Yeah, Buffy was there just
in time."

"She always is. I never doubt it."

There was a silence then. It was strange, being here like this. I knew nearly everything
about her, every single detail, but she knew nothing about me. For instance, I knew she
couldn't stand long silences, and she would break it soon. As soon as I thought that, she
began to speak.

"You're name's Pat?" I nodded. "Oh, I'm Willow. But you probably already knew that cause
Buffy probably told you I was coming, but I should've said&sorry." She smiled and blushed.
It was the cutest thing I'd ever seen. "I babble. It's a habit."

"I like it." I told her honestly.

"So where are you from?"

Uh oh. Lie, I said to myself. But I couldn't lie to Willow. "Pennsylvania."

"Really?" She asked, surprised. "Isn't that far away?"

"About three-thousand miles." Why couldn't I shut up?

"Is your family back there?"

"Yeah."

"How'd you end up here?"

"I've been&living with an uncle&but one night he didn't come home." I had no choice but to
lie now, Willow or not. What was I going to say?

Then came the frown and sympathetic expression. I felt like the lowest scum on the face of
the Earth.

"Vampires?"

"I guess. I'm not sure."

"No wonder you were out by yourself." Did she think I was trying to go vigilante on the
vampires? "I get it," She was grabbing my hand now. Oh God. I really got myself into a
hole. "But you could've gotten seriously hurt. Or worse. Promise me you'll be careful from
now on?"

I looked into her eyes. "I promise."

She smiled at me. "Good." She switched to worry almost immediately. "You haven't been
living by yourself, have you?"

"Yeah, but not long."

"Well, we can call your parents in Pennsylvania, and -"

"No." I told her, shaking my head quickly. "I moved out here&uh&hoping to start out on my
own. Till I could get a job I stayed with my uncle. I don't want my parents to know I
bombed."

"Then we'll figure something else out." She left it that.

I knew she would. Parents weren't a pleasant subject for any of the members of the gang.
It was soon after that, when I remembered how tired I was. And I was comforted, knowing
that she wasn't going to move from the chair she was sitting in, until I left the next
day, still feeling less than deserving of her attention.

***

In the morning, when I woke up, Willow was standing over me. She had a wheelchair sitting
by my bed, and I guessed I was supposed to get in. After some fiddling with the bed
controls and a little assistance, I was in. She informed me that the Physical Therapy room
had a whole stock of crutches, so I could get replacements. Once I did, and she helped me
weasel out of paying for them (I didn't have medical insurance. Not * here *, anyway.), I
went back to my room to change out of the stupid gown and then I was out of there.

As we walked out, I began to dwell on the fact that I was in Sunnydale. I had no idea how
I came to be there, I just remember walking down the street with vampires following me
last night, and not given a second thought to where I was. You didn't think I knew that
Sunnydale was a fictional town? As well as everybody in it? But I just knew the place, and
a few people so well, and they seemed real enough to me. They couldn't have been solely
products from a writer's brain.

Therein lied my dilemma. I didn't belong here. And I couldn't tell anyone who I really
was, or what they were. But I wasn't in a rush to leave. I was living every fan's dream,
and entering into Buffy's world for me had been second nature. I guess that's what happens
when you watch something for four years. I got to know it better than my own town. Anyway,
it must have been summer, because they didn't seem in any rush to figure out how to beat a
big, bad evil. If I guessed right, it was a little after "Restless".

That meant it would be more or less normal. And that was fine with me. I was used to a
normal, non-apocalyptic, lifestyle. Plus, I had already been in mortal danger, and the
thrill of getting attacked by real vampires ended as soon as I saw them. I welcomed the
boredom of the off-season I never got to see before. That meant the only character, no,
person I wouldn't get to see was Riley, because he had returned home the summer. That was
a shame too, because I really wanted to shake his hand. He had survived pretty gruesome
stuff. But now I had to take a step back, and realize what I had been through.

I had been down Main Street, attacked by vampires, injured, saved by Buffy, inside Giles'
house, bandaged by him, in Sunnydale General Hospital, talked with Willow, given a bear&it
took every ounce of my self-control to not laugh giddily. When we reached the
entrance/exit, I caught sight of Giles standing by his car. I grimaced, knowing all too
well, the ride I was in for.

Willow must have sensed my apprehension, because she leaned in close and whispered to me.

"It's got good seatbelts. That's a plus, right?"

It certainly was.

***

Xander and Anya had apparently decided to come along for the ride. Was I being punished?
She was the last person I wanted to see. Xander was cool, however lacking in direction,
but I could have done without Anya. None of us knew what to say. Willow did quick
introductions, but I could see that she wasn't very fond of Anya either. I sat in the
passenger seat up front, and spent most of the trip back to Giles' talking with Willow.

"So you're a hacker?" I asked in my best 'I had no clue' voice.

"Yep. And a wicca too." She wasn't sure I knew what that was, so she explained further.
"Wiccas are witches. But good ones."

"So you're not evil?"

"Nope. No evil here. Just your ordinary, good guy."

"You don't seem ordinary to me."

It was then that I realized some things. One was that I was flirting with Willow. That was
a dumb move on so many levels, and I hope I don't have to explain why. The other thing I
noticed through the rearview mirror, was that Anya had been staring at me almost the
entire way.

"Yes?" I asked, addressing her.

"Are you hiding something?" She asked, flat out.

Now I was in trouble. Anya did always seem to have a keen perception of things. Willow
quickly reversed the topic of conversation. I don't know why she did it, but I wasn't
going to pass up my "Get Out of this Conversation Free' card.

"So what do you like to do?" Willow inquired.

"Uh&I write."

"Really? What about?"

I had to play this right, or it could blow up in my face.

"A lot about vampires, actually. I think they're interesting." It was a version of the
truth anyway.

And like Obi-Wan said, truth depends on your point of view. I almost made myself feel
better.

Xander decided to chip in. "Interesting isn't how I'd label 'em. Horrifying sounds a
little more accurate."

"I found that out."

Willow slapped him. "Xander!"

"What?" He asked.

"Hey! I'm the only one who gets to slap him!" Anya yelled.

Giles had to intervene. "Children! We're almost there. Could you please be civilized?"

"Sorry, Giles." Willow apologized.

"Yeah, sorry." Xander said.

Anya didn't say a word.

***

It was decided that I'd stay at Giles' until they could think of a more permanent
solution. I was supposed to start college soon, and wouldn't it be funny if I ended up
going to UC Sunnydale and living there? It was all too bizarre. But that was later. Now, I
was simply enjoying my time here, because I knew it wasn't going to last forever.

Later that night I was taken to the Bronze, after going by the Mini-Golf course, for a
nine-hole round. Yes, there is a course in town. The writers flubbed. Buffy had spent the
morning with her mom, and then had met us at the course. She made it a point to tell me
not to use my new crutches as weapons to foolishly attack vampires, but then she let it
drop. And I officially thanked her for saving my life.

Okay, back to mini-golf.

Let's just say I wasn't very good at it at first. Swinging a club while balancing on one
crutch was a talent I had not yet mastered. But then, Xander came up with a rather
ingenious idea. I was surprised. He removed the crutch tip from the crutch my right hand
was gripping, and replaced it with a club head. I had better control and balance that way.

But I still wasn't that good of a golfer.

"Swing through it. Bring your arm back. This is the windmill so you're timing has to be
perfect." He was offering me tips.

I had to refer to the scorecard. "This from a guy who's at plus five."

Anya glared at me, but Buffy and Willow made a long drawn out 'ooh' sound.

"He zinged you, Xand." Buffy said.

"Thanks, Buff. I know. I was there." Then he smiled. "But I've still got a lower score."

I let him win that. Even though I saw him cheat.

Like I said, after Mini-Golf, the sun was just about down and we went to the Bronze.
Willow started telling me all about it. I think she liked playing tour guide.

"There was a weird lightning storm last night," She was saying, "It only lasted like a
couple minutes, but it knocked the power out. They weren't sure if they were going to
open."

They obviously had though, because people were entering the club in droves. It was
extremely loud inside. I mean loud. There was no band, so they had some techno stuff
blaring throughout the club. Xander was drink guy, and went over to the bar. We got a
table, and sat down. I looked around, remembering all the stuff that had happened here. I
could see it so clearly, and it made me shiver.

The Harvest, Darla with two nine millimeters, Oz's werewolf rampage, Vampire Willow's take
over&

It didn't seem to bother them, though, and I found myself wondering why. I mean, I had
just been watching it happen, but to them, they had lived it. Yet they still came here. I
concluded that unless I had lived through it, I would never truly understand their
mindsets. After a few minutes, another blonde shyly came up to the table. I knew who it
was.

"Tara!" Willow said immediately. You could hear the happiness in her voice.

"Hey." Tara said with a smile, but so softly I could barely hear her.

She looked at everyone, and when she passed by me, she looked at me a little longer. I
knew part of it was probably because she hadn't seen me before, but there was something
else in her eyes. Willow saw her looking at me, and chastised herself.

"I'm such an idiot! Tara, this is Pat. He's&a friend."

"Hi." I said.

Tara gave me a small smile. Willow rose from her seat and went over to her.

"Wanna&um&dance?"

The blonde nodded. I could tell they didn't want to give away much about they're
involvement around me. I didn't blame them. I watched them head into the dancing crush,
and a few seconds later, Xander and Anya announced they were going to follow suit. It was
just Buffy and I at the table then.

***

I knew the distracted expression on Buffy's face, and I could read her like a book. She
was depressed. It might have been because Riley wasn't there and she didn't have a dancing
partner, but I had a feeling it was something else. And no, I don't dance. I would've
ended up crushing her toes, and the last thing Sunnydale needed was an out of commission
slayer.

"What's up?" I couldn't stand to see her sad. She didn't smile enough.

"My love life's not that interesting." She said to me. I could tell she didn't mean to say
that. It just slipped out.

"Somehow I doubt that."

"It's pretty much a downer."

"But you still have one." I pointed out. I didn't, but I was working on it. Or I planned
to before I ended up here.

"It's not all it's cracked up to be. Always ends up that badness beats out the good
stuff."

"Everything relationship is rocky at times."

"I don't just get a few rocks. I get avalanches."

"I know." I said with a sympathetic tone.

"How could you?"

I knew I was going to slip up. "I just meant, given your line of work, you must have a lot
more baggage than other people who aren't&vampire slayers."

"Oh." She looked like she bought it. "You could say that."

"What's wrong with the relationship you're in now? You are in -"

I was interrupted by a cocky British voice that I knew could only belong to one person.
Well, he wasn't a person at all, really.

"Well look at Blondie doing charity work. Who's the cripple?"

"Shove it, Spike." She hissed at him, and looked at me. "He's just being an asshole cause
he can't bite anymore."

I pretended to be shocked. "He's a vampire?"

"That's right." Spike declared. I finally saw the bottle of alcohol he was carrying. "I'm
the baddest vampire there ever was. So be scared."

"Little drunk?"

"What's it to you, Stick Boy? Sod off."

I saw Buffy looking at my crutches lying under the table. I knew what she wanted to do,
and I nodded, giving the okay. She grabbed one, and with lightning fast speed, she gave
him a good shot to his undead manhood. He dropped his bottle, which shattered on the
floor, as he dropped to the ground.

"I thought crutch-to-vampire groin shots were a no-no."

She smiled. "He's the exception to the rule. He looks hurt. Think we should get him a
wheelchair?"

"No!" He screamed suddenly. "I can walk out of here on my bloody own, thank you very
much!" He was obviously thinking about his previous wheelchair confinement, which Buffy
had caused.

True to his word, he stumbled out, and Buffy finally laughed. That pleased me to no end.

"I feel better."

"Glad to hear it."

The smile slowly dwindled, though, and she sighed. "Okay, you know how when certain
distractions aren't around, you start thinking about things you know you're better off
just ignoring?"

It took me a minute to follow her question. "Yeah&what kind of a distractions are we
talking about?"

"One distraction actually. Riley. He's my boyfriend. I just called him a&" She frowned.
"That sounded really bad, didn't it?"

"I know what you meant. So what don't you want to be thinking about?"

"God, I can't believe I'm telling you this&Willow and I, we've been best friends ever
since I moved here, but this year we kinda drifted a little. Riley was a big part of that.
Not that I'm saying it's his fault, but&" She shut her eyes, and when she opened them
again she looked a little less strained. "Since he left, we've been reconnecting, and
feelings have been -"

She cut herself off, and I followed her gaze to the two dancing wiccas. I knew who she was
looking at.

"You love her, don't you?" I asked gently.

She didn't look at me. She was still looking at them. "Yeah."

"But she's with Tara, isn't she?"

Now she faced me. "It's that obvious, huh?"

"I think it's sweet." She just stared at me. "But you obviously don't."

"No&well&I'm happy for her&really&"

"But you want to be the blonde she's dancing with."

"See my problem?"

I did. All too clearly. It was one thing writing about them getting together, but to see
the feelings there in front of me, it was like vindication. I could help Buffy out, but
did I really want to get directly involved in their lives? If I did, people were going to
get hurt, and I didn't know if I could do that.

"Just gotta deal, I guess." She said after a little bit. "Thanks for listening. And not
freaking."

"No problem."

Dilemmas, dilemmas&



--
"I wanna set the record straight. I thought the cop was a prostitute." (Homer J. Simpson)

"You think you know? What's to come? What you are? You haven't even begun."
(Tara to Buffy, BTVS)


"Since when is there a cowboy in 'Death of a Salesman' anyway?" (Willow, BTVS)