The Directorate of Nonsensical Mayhem's state of the gutter report

["sam stoltz" <shadowmage_draco@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

To: The Director of Public Safety.
Chief of Security of the Senior Executive Committee
All other Gutter Directorates

CC: The Vegetable Empire
President Gutter-Canadian Benevolent Society, International
Brotherhood of Guttershoremen
The undercover gutter-dwelling scooter-trash
All other interested parties

From: The Directorate of Nonsensical Mayhem

Subject: Gutter situation report

1. Sadly the directorate of nonsensical mayhem has ran out of Riley
and wolf-boy voodoo dolls, the demand was simply more than we have
anticipated. We are researching a means to obtain more and will
notify the residents of the gutter when they arrive.

2. To who ever painted the watchtower at the north end of town purple
and orange, we commend you one a job well done.

3. It has come to the attention of this directorate that several of
the inhabitants of the woods out back have been spotted near the
Sunnydale campus. However this matter is outside the jurisdiction of
this directorate and is being turned over to the chief of security
and the director of public safety for further investigation. In the
mean time I would encourage any one spotting wood inhabitants in
Sunnydale prime to notify said chief of security or the director of
public safety, and please for now let them roam until a decision from
a more responsible directorate can be made, after all with the
exception of a few weasels the inhabitants of the woods out back are
harmless.

4. The first annual trick or treat bash is fast approaching, so get
ready, grab a costume, and your best party favorites. It will take
place at the gutter lake, and will commence at midnight with a jet
sky race, all participants will be required to wear neon life vest
for safety reasons, all other clothing for this race is optional.
We hope to see everyone out their. Please note do top the close
proximity to the woods out back we would like to remind the
party go'ers to please feed the animals, they like candy. Also
we would like to warn any would be party go'ers to think twice
before taking funny looking mushrooms from a sunglasses wearing
Koala, they tend to have strange effects on humans

Sam (I Am)

Director of Nonsensical Mayhem
Proud supporter of the list Bards
Unofficial roamer of the list gutter
Campaigner for all the bards to use their shapshifting abilities and
come to the woods out back
Sammy the Koala
liquor cabinet inspector for the woods out back
ICQ: 91832309

--Did ya know that All of the clocks in the movie "Pulp Fiction" are
stuck on 4:20.