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Title:
Entropy, Schmentropy [1/?]
Author: Dan Spector Pairing: B/W, of course Rating: PG, and only for lesbian themes. And minor angst, and yelling. Disclaimer: Yeah, I'm Joss, that's why I haven't been writing, I've been busy shooting "Firefly". Okay, not really. Spoilers: Takes place between "Normal Again" and "Entropy". References are mostly to "Normal Again", but will eventually include "Anne", "Intervention" and most of Season 6. Summary: Buffy finally lets it all out. Archiving: Obviously, any submissions list can have it. Otherwise ask, and I'm about as likely to refuse as I am to turn into a Spuffy-lover. Feedback: But, of course. Send to the lists or to danspector@xxxxxxxxx Author's Note: I'm in the camp that feels we needed a big emotional breakthrough after the musical, and instead we got minor comedy with "Tabula Rasa". But, oddly, now that Buffy's had her epiphany and is able to share her feelings with the gang, I don't think it has to be so "Sturm und Drang" any more, so I wrote this with a lighter touch. And I broke it into parts because I wanted to get at least some of it out before "Entropy" aired. Although I appear to be too late for the East Coast. Sorry. (Spent way too much time trying to make the email addy a clickable link. Apparently MSN has changed the HTML rules on me. Ugh.)
"Willow, I just don't understand this!" Buffy railed at her redheaded friend. "What on earth were you thinking?" "I know, I know, it was wrong," Willow pleaded. "Buffy, I'm so sorry." "You're sorry? Well then, okay, saying that makes everything go away, right?" the slayer sneered. "I feel ever so much better now." "Hey!" Xander objected from where he was sitting on the Summerses' couch. "I don't think you ought to" "N-no, Xander, let her talk," Willow said, her voice quavering as she slunk into the depths of the chair. "I deserve it." The carpenter hesitated for a second and then tried to relax, as Dawn moved closer to him and clung to his arm even more fiercely. "Oh, so I've got your permission to be angry?" Buffy continued to rage as she paced back and forth in her living room. "How noble and generous of you, Miss High and Mighty Witch! Of course, we wouldn't be in this mess if you had gotten my permission to RIP ME OUT OF HEAVEN!!!" "I know, I thought about doing a locator spell, but there were so many hells to check, and I didn't want you in any of them" Willow pleaded, her face a ravaged picture of regret. "Hey!" Buffy cut her off. "Did I ask you to explain? I know you don't like to think about what other people want, but I was hoping that you might have learned something in that tiny little brain of" Suddenly the slayer stopped her tirade, noting the tear falling from the hacker's eye. "Oh, god, Will!" Buffy said, racing to the chair and dropping to her knees in front of it. "I did too much, didn't I? I don't want to make you cry!" "No, no, go back to the yelling, I deserve it," Willow insisted. "No, this is stupid," Buffy said. "I don't even know if I was in heaven any more; it could have been the asylum dimension, if that wasn't just a delusion, and the 'peace' I thought I had might have just been the drugs or something." "Yeah, 'cuz you said you thought we were safe," Dawn pointed out. "And even though Glory was gone, we kind of...weren't," she finished with a shiver. Buffy rose, moving over to stroke Dawn's head. "I know," she said, patting the shiny locks, "it was probably just another way of my trying to run away and hide, and I shouldn't" "No, Buffy, you're not venting! And you have to vent," Willow insisted. "Even if you were wrong to have those feelings, you had them, and you have to let them out, or you'll still be suffering." "Not to mention, maybe you'll get all oogly and want to kill us again or something," a worried Dawn chimed in. "I would never hurt you guys!" Buffy protested, before catching herself. "Except for the fact that I just did." "Hey, pain, psychosis, near-death experiencesit's just Sunnydale's way of spicing up the slow nights." Xander reassured the conflicted slayer. "No big. Back to the screaming. Only...don't overdo it, okay?" "Okay,' Buffy said. "But you're not getting off that easily. I'm going to be screaming at you, too." "Why are you screaming at Xander?" Anya said, having just walked into the house. "I should be screaming at Xander, he's mine!" TBC |