The Slayer And The Witch - Chapter 14/? - Who Put The Mo In Mojo?

["Stefan Akerblom" <nagarek@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

Title: Message

    Hi all.

 

    Here's the next bit of story,R/L has been a bit thick and full on lately, hence the slowness of updates, so apologies in advance for the people following this, Life has a habit of butting in where it's not really wanted. Anyway please enjoy.

    Stefan Akerblom
    nagarek@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
    ICQ: 156764542

 

 

 

 

The Slayer And The Witch - Stefan Akerblom - nagarek@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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Critique:  Yes please, but no flames (I'm flammable)
Warning:  Building to NC-17, f/f relations, possibly f/f/m
Characters: Willow, Buffy, Xander, Anya, Giles, Tara, Angel, Dawn, Spike, Wes, Cordy, Oz (?), nurse Becky Chapel, nurse Erin Lonsdale,
Main Pairing/s: Willow & Buffy, maybe Giles/Becky/Erin - who wants to see that? :o) (not sure yet about Anya/Xander ... maybe) time will reveal all!
Disclaimer: Joss Whedon owns all in the Buffy Universe, I have merely played and embellished, not claimed any rights, apart from a couple of nice nursies!

 

Brief:  Buffy and Willow have both recently lost their partners, Willow is hospitalised and Buffy is almost paralysed with guilt over it, both Willow and Buffy realise how much they really mean to each other, they embark on a voyage of discovery and figuring out a way to break their new relationship to their friends while keeping the minions of the hellmouth from taking over. Meanwhile solutions present themselves which can have far reaching effects on Buffy and Willow's future.

 

Distribution: Anyone who likes it enough to host it, just please give me a link to where it's hosted

 

Many thanks go to:
Crys Loch (pagansoul@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx) for answering my email, and a lot of inspiration and much encouragement (you said just the right things to make me think while I channeled Willow),
Dan Spector (danspector@xxxxxxxxx) for somemuch needed help with authenticity,
Casandra (jeepy91@xxxxxxx) for answering some silly and some very awkward questions, you're very special
Thanks also to all the other great people on BuffyWantsWillow, you make this worth so much to me,
andto Cairo (played at ear-splitting volume) for setting the mood.
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Chapter 14 - Who put the mo in mojo?

 

 "Uh ... I haven't been in because I didn't know until recently that you were here. I usually got my supplies from Sandersons in San Fran, their catalog's pretty extensive, not to mention they're on the web, I could order across the net and have my stuff sent out usually within a couple of days, all dependent on availability of course. Goblin hands and hearts and mummy teeth and stuff are usually a couple of extra days wait." Giles nodded as Erin explained why she'd never made an appearance in the Magic Box.

 

 "SEE? I TOLD you we shouldhave set up a web page, but NOOO ... Mister 'I don't like anything that's newer or more complicated than the crossbow' over there, is just too scared of computers and technology for that! I'm surprised we have phones here ... he'd probably prefer ... smoke signals!" Anya shook her hands in exasperation at Giles, and turned around, while Xander tried to intercept her hands and hold them still in his own. "I mean look at this cash register ... it predates Columbus for cryin'out loud!"

 

 "Shh ..." he shh'd at her.Anya looked at him and rolled her eyes.

 

 "What? AGAIN? I'm doing itagain?" Xander closed his eyes, smiled and nodded. Anya pursed her lips in annoyance, and crossed her arms in defiance. She continued, a bit more quietly. "Well I'm still right, we should have set up a web page! Now we're way behind the times again, as usual ... think of all the lost profit ..." she pouted and muttered "... things were so much simpler when I was a demon ..." Giles looked over his shoulder briefly in annoyance, then turned back ignoring Anya's outbursts.

 

 "And you say you can feel Willow's ... er ... her wicca power, even now?"

 

 "Yeah, I felt it right away in the hospital when I first saw her, it was awesome, almost overpowering. I haven't felt that much power before in a single person, like you're a powerplant ofmojo energy or something." Erin gushed at Willow, who just sat and smiled while her bruised face turned pink. " I knew you were a very powerful wicca right then, but I didn't think it was the right time or the place to talk about witchcraft." Willow sighed and looked down at her hands.

 

 "Yeah ... wicca in reform anyway, I'm not practicing any more ... I've ... had my days of ... of Glory." Willow smiled sadly and looked at her. "You know a lot about wicca?" Erin returnedher look, and then cast her eyes about the group, who still stared openly at her, amazed at the similarity between herself and Willow. They weren't identical, but the differences were hardly noticed, the similarities far outweighed them. Her personality was more confident however, more outspoken.

 

 "Yeah I know a fair bit ... but ... why'd you quit Willow, why now? You have power I would love to have, power I could only dream about having, I can feel it coursing through your body right now, it's like a whirlpool of energy in the middle of this room, anyone who's used magic in any way should be able to feel it ... I ... I can almost see it ... you ..." she looked again at the rest of the group. Giles cleaned his glasses absently, then put them back on.

 

 "Willow was ... sucked into the ... well the Dark Side, for want of a hackneyed term bandied about by overly melodramatic science fiction movies. Willow became addicted to the power ... and it very nearly destroyed not only herself but ... it nearly took some of uswith it ... as well." The second red-head shook her head in amazement, looking at the ground at her feet with clouded and confused eyes, but then they cleared and she looked up at Giles.

 

 "That's impossible Mr. Giles, wicca doesn't have that kind of influence it has no Dark Side. Wicca is pure and good magic, earth magic. What you describe isn't wicca at all, it ... it's ... evil, dark magic. And ..." she trailed off and looked back to Willow who sat quietly through the conversation, then her brows crinkled as she understood. "Oh ... you ... didn't just ..." Willow looked at her and her eyes were filled with sadness. She wrung her hands and scratched at her wrist where the plastic brace had been put back. She began to speak softly.

 

 "I ... did ... Buffy ..." she hesitated, then realised what she'd said and shook her head and began breathing rapidly in embarrassment "... I ... uh ... no that ... that's not what I meant ..." she sighed and took a deep breath to steady her nerves. "Buffy died. Several months later I brought her back." Erin and Becky both gasped and looked at Buffy, who looked back and the ghost of a smile crept onto her lips as she spoke.

 

 "What can I say ... I got better." Erin clapped her hands to her lips and her eyes widened. She hissed.

 

 "Oh Sweet Diana! You used the Satrazon Codex, didn't you?" Willow looked sideways, her eyes full of grief, here was someone who really knew and understood what she'd done.

 

 "Uh ... and the Verbeeg Grimoire, the um ... Salazar Texts and the ..." she looked up at the dumbstruck Gileswith big sad eyes "... the Adjubadjani Writings." Erin simply goggled at what Willow had just said. Angel remained silent but his eyes clouded over with a look of dire concern, Wes sat silently and grabbed his chin and shook his head, closing his eyes as it dawned on him what Willow had really done. Giles slapped his hands to his forehead and gave out a sharp gasp.

 

 "OH MY GOD IN HEAVEN!" He stalked away and lost himself among the cabinets and book shelves, they could all hear his cursing and muttering and crashing about from where they sat and stood,this was the most agitation he'd ever openly shown them since they had first gotten to know him. Buffy felt something, an odd feeling in the back of her mind about Giles, but she couldn't put her finger on it. Erin knelt down before Willowand looked into her eyes from below. Then as the red-heads continued speaking, everyone's eyes returned to that conversation. Erin swallowed and continued, her voice subdued and hushed in awe.

 

 "A ... and you're still alive ... and sane ... it didn't kill you or ... or do anything else ... worse?" Erin looked at her wide eyed in complete and utter amazement.

 

 "Well ... uh ... I'm sane ... at least I think I'm sane ... and I feel alive, the ... the doctors said I was alive, I had a beating heart and ... everything. But it did affect me ... and pretty badly ..." Buffy cleared her throat.

 

 "Ahem ... for those of us not completely into the Readers Digest witchcraft series at this time, can someone please explain what the heck all this means?" Becky stood beside her with her arms crossed and nodded agreement. Giles made his way silently out of the book stacks, his eyes red rimmed and his face white, his glasses held carelesslyby one arm. He stood and listened. Becky spoke up.

 

 "Yeah baby, not all of us are as up on witchcraft as you guys, especially me, it gives me the willies sometimeswith what you do." They all looked at Erin. Xander spoke softly.

 

 "So you're a practicing wicca too then, not just that you know a lot about it?" Erin nodded and turned to look at him.

 

 "Yeah I'm practicing, but my main strength is healing and empathy magic, but I have done a lot of extensive research into all types of magic. I can never hope to get as powerful as Willow, even if I live to be a hundred, she has more power than I have ever seen inone individual before, and believe me I've seen people with some pretty heavy wicca power. And from what she just said, she's lucky to be alive." This again brought looks of confusion and concern from everyone, Xander looked like he'd somehow understood a part of the danger without having to know the mechanics of the magic. Erin saw the confusion so she continued. "I'll try to explain, so stick with me guys, this isn't completely cut and dried so I'll try my best to make it understandable." She stood back up, composed herself, and sighing deeply she began speaking, pacing the floor before Willow. "The worlds and the spheres around the worlds, the other dimensions, are filled with power, with essence and energy we all call magic. On earth this energy is available to those in tune with the world, in touch with the bands of power that binds us and surrounds us all and weaves it's way between us and through us all like ..." she struggled for an analogy and shrugged "... like the force. Willow channelled magic that's not meant to be tapped into by us mortals, magic ... so primordial ... so powerful that it's usually reserved only for the gods themselves, and even they don't like using it. The books she used, the grimoires and codices, they're books written by people who spent their entire lives researching powerful sorcery and magic, often being driven insane by their work. The power of the magic is such that mortals should never be allowed access to this stuff. But these guys were the ... the mediaeval equivalent of ... uh ... computer hackers, they tapped into the streams of primal magics and were able to record their findings and describe what was necessary to complete some of this ... grimmest magic. Often it delved into power that taps into what's called the Maelstrom Of Hellfury, a sort of whirlpool of chaotic primal magical energy which is what powers Hell itself and all it's many sub dimensions. Death Magic like Willow used, breaks through the natural barriers between the spheres, into the hell dimensions and uses this primal hell power, and it's not meant for mankind to use. There's usually severe consequences, and often something monstrous and powerful inhabiting hell, sees when it's being used and where it's going, they can often trail the flow of energy back to this sphere, back to the worlds of the living. The gods themselves rarely use this power because of it's corrupting influence. But like Mr. Giles said, it's like the Power of the Dark Side, it's easier, it's quicker, it's pure evil and it's dirty ... and it taints you. Wicca is white magic, good magic, earth magic, it belongs in this world and is what this world is ultimately made of. And the two can't easily mix, they fight for supremacy, that's why users of both magics usually stand a pretty good chance of going insane trying to control and balance them, the magic fights in their system until one side or the other takes over, and it's usually the dark magic that wins, it just overwhelms the senses. That's why I was wondering if Willow had been affected by it in some way, whether mental or physical or emotional or whatever." She sighed and stopped for a moment, looking for the words to make her point as easily as possible. "Willow is lucky to be sane, let alone alive, once bitten you usually stay bit. If you have been able to break the bond to the dark side and live and you're still completely sane, you've done something I have never heard of throughout all of written history, usually if someone has the strength to break away, the struggle for freedom ends up with the person dying in some way." she looked with concern at Willow, then back to the Scoobies. "The Dark Side doesn't let go of it's children easily." Willow spoke softly and betrayed the cost of what had befallen her by shuddering unconsciously.

 

 "Well, i ... it wasn't easy ... it hurt me, physically and mentally a ... and I suppose emotionally too. And it cost me, more than I think I will ever be able to fully understand. A ... and I couldn't have done it without Buffy, and Dawn ..." she paused and frowned, looking very sad "... a ... and the rest of my friends ... who stuck by me through it all." she suddenly looked up with glistening eyes. "I ... it's not going to affect anyone else is it, I've paid enough haven't I ... f ... forwhat I did?" Erin looked at her with pursed lips, she tucked her hair behind herear and looked into Willow's eyes.

 

 "Willow, you know that magic always has a price, always has consequences. I hope for your sake, and that of allyour friends, that you have finished paying the price, but I can't be ... I can't tell you that for sure. Using magic like that could have cost not only your life, but your soul too ..." Buffy's mind went back to Tara's words to her in private about the spells, and turned pale at the memory of what she had told her, what could have happened to Willow, how much Willow had been willing to sacrifice to bring Buffy back.

 

 "Wuh ... waitaminnit ... her soul? Whaddya mean her soul, has she lost her soul or ... or did she ... has she ..." Xander began babbling and gesticulating. Wes cleared his throat and spoke for the first time since Erin's introduction, his words soft and sibilant.

 

 "Xander, she means that Willow could have mis-cast the magic and lost her own soul in the process, IF something had gone wrong. It's ... often one of the prices you bargain with when you cast magic of this nature, you quite often use your own soul or the souls of others ... among other things ... as a prize to tempt the primal powers. There is nothing as sweet and pure and tempting to the powers of evil, as a good and innocent soul." He sat upright and took off his glasses. "The combinations of magic in the texts she used, they ... they're not always ... compatible ..." he pinched the bridge of his nose and pursed his lips trying to find the right words "... some of the magic is mutually exclusive, it fights the other magic for ... right of way ... I suppose you could say, for supremacy. And to keep that in check, to keep the power in balance is an enormously complex and tiresome task, one I wouldn't ever imagine myself or anyone else having the courage to take on ..." He put his glasses back on and looked to Buffy, who looked back at him with terror filled eyes. He turned and looked again at Willow with renewed respect for her. He again spoke softly. "We could very easily have lost Willow right there and then, not just Buffy. And not just to the Dark Side, but her very life and soul itself could have been forfeit. She might have died and been beyond salvation, her soul trapped and tortured for all eternity or ..." he gulped and looked at Willow, his voice lowered to a whisper "... oreven ... devoured ..." His voice trailed off. Xander and Anya stood and stared dumbstruck at Willow. Xander swallowed and licked his lips nervously, eyes wide and staring at Willow, his voice strangled and tense, his shaking hands waving aimlessly.

 

 "We didn't know anything about this! And like idiots, we just sat there and watched snakes coming out of her mouth and saw her body slashed open and bleeding by the magic, we ... we just sat around Buffy's grave like ... like damned boy scouts around a bonfire, and let her do this, we let her nearly kill herself ... we didn't know ..." Willow spoke up then, her voice pained and her eyes looking at Xander, pleading for understanding.

 

 "Xander, NOBODY knew, e ... except Tara and she only knew a very small part of it. I told nobody because I knew you'd all fight me, you would have stopped me from doing it if you'd known,a ... and I needed all of you so much then... I needed your strength and your support." She looked around the room. " But I knew what I was risking, I knew the danger I put myself ... and ..." she turned back and her eyes again locked with Xander's "... and you guys in, I never offered your souls, I only offered mine. I knew it was dangerous. But I knew I could do it, I ... I knew if you helped me I ... we could pull it off. And you DID help me, because you didn't know the ultimate price I would have to pay if I failed, you only knew thatI could succeed, because I didn't let you know that I COULD fail. And I was right, e ... even though it seemed I'd messed up right at the end. My heart nearly stopped all by itself then because I thought I'd failed, and I'd not only lost my own soul, I'd killed us all. But the spell worked, the power had alreadybeen drawn through the blo ... through the urn of Osiris. I just didn't know it,and by that time I was too exhausted to know much of anything." She looked up at Buffy who had stood with glistening eyes through most of this exchange. "But I ... I thought ... I just knew in my heart that Buffy was suffering ... agony, terrible pain ... somewhere in a ... hell dimension ... and I had to save her ... I just had to because ..." she looked back to Xander and her voice lowered, shaky and tremulous with her convictions "... because I love her so much ... and I just couldn't sit back and let her suffer like that, not when I had a chance, not when I could bring her back to me ... to us. I would do anything ... anything ... I would pay any price, even if that ... if that meant ... my own ..." She swallowed and her face began falling then, her eyes filling with tears "... I ... I had no idea ... sh ... uh ... she was in he ... heaven." She looked back to Buffy, her lower lip trembling and her composure falling apart completely. "I ... uh ... I'm so ... s ... sorry Buh ... Buffy ... so ... so sorry ..." Buffy lowered herself to her knees and embraced Willow who grabbed her spasmodically, tightly, apparently clinging on for dear life, her head on Buffy's shoulder. Buffy whispered quietly to her, and everyone else looked around uncomfortably.

 

 "Shhh ... hey it's ok, Will ... please, it's ok, I ... I don't mind ... really. I ... I'm just glad we've found each other like this ..." She stroked Willow's hair. "I wouldn't want to be anywhere else now, not even heaven. Hey ... I'm there ..." Willow looked up, her eyelashes clotted with thick tears and her cheeks wet, her lips twisted, the trembling stopped. Buffy smiled at her and stroked her cheek "You know that... that I'm really in heaven now, because you're here ... with me ... by my side." Willow's lips again began trembling and she let out racking shuddering sobsas she buried her face in Buffy's shoulder again.

 

 "Giles went over to Angel,and spoke softly, Becky and Erin were both close enough to overhear.

 

 "Angel, it's getting closeto sundown outside, maybe it's best we chain you up before it becomes too late." Angel nodded and began rising out of the chair. Becky's eyebrows shot up asshe listened, Giles looked over to her, seeing the look in her eyes. "Oh ... oh... uh ... don't worry, it's not what you ... ah ... I'll let one of the others explain." He went with Angel towards the door leading down to the cellar. Buffy leaned across and whispered.

 

 "Nothing to worry about ... uh ... yet, Angel's a vampire."

 

 Becky and Erin looked at each other, eyebrows raised in alarm. Becky spoke with a soft voice betraying her amazement, her senses numb with all the revelations of the day.

 

 "Oh?"

 

 "Yeah ... Wes and Angel fight demons and monsters and stuff in L.A."

 

 "Oh!"

 

 Becky looked at her partner, took a deep breath and shook her head.

 

 "Jeeze Erin, and I used tothink YOU were into some heavy crap!"
 
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 "So this Spike guy, he's avampire too, same as Angel? And ... a ... a demon ... Thassos killed him? Sounds Greek." Becky sat and pointed at the shirt lying on the table in front of her.

 

 "Thassoq, a Morgal demon, a mercenary creature, as usual bent on destruction and any sort of carnage he's capable of causing." Wes said, he pulled out a cell phone. "If you'll excuse me, I have some phone calls to make." He began pushing buttons and walked off to another part of the store.

 

 "And he had this ... this amulet that can make Angel evil again, release his soul? And now the demon likely has it? Whoever heard of a vampire with a soul anyway? Aren't they supposed to be demons as well?" Buffy nodded, sighed and stretched.

 

 "Angel's soul, now that's a long story, and we can go into that some other time. But the rest of it just about sums things up I suppose. Angel went out searching for Spike to see if he'd found the amulet, and when he got to the crypt, all he found was a scorched patch of grass with his clothes lying nearby. Dawn, could you please make us all some drinks?" Dawn sighed and stood up from where she'd been sitting in an easy chair. Unenthusiastically she spoke in a monotone.

 

 "Ok, what does everyone want?" She walked over to the table, her eyes again cast down at the clothes.

 

 "Yeah and Spike's not about to go streaking through the cemetery without his bat-cape on, he's got this thing about the coat ..." Xander stretched back in his chair, hands behind his head. "Thinks he looks cool in it or something. Uh ... make mine a white coffee Dawnie, thanks."

 

 "Tea for Giles and Wes, Coffee Buffy, Cocoa Anya and Willow ..." Dawn looked at Erin, who smiled and nodded "... and Willow-two and me, Becky?" Becky looked up.

 

 "Uh ... Coffee please, black and not too strong. What about this other guy, this Cola ... or whatever his name was, he's here too? What ... is this Hell Central Railway Station or something?" Becky sighed as she tried to understand the words she had been hearing, herlife with her wife had been one of exploration and discovery about supernatural power, but she'd had no idea it was so heavily concentrated in Sunnydale, as she was now finding out. Erin reached out and squeezed Becky's hand.

 

 "I've told you sweetie, this is the hellmouth, evil gathers here because it's like a focus point, it's the junction of many ley-lines of power, that's why there's always been such a heavy population of evil creatures here. But that's also why normally ordinary people can draw on the power of the ley-lines and become powerful sorcerors and witches too. There's just a lot of power here, free for the taking by whoever is strong enough, has the most willpower and wants it badly enough. Willow is a good example of it, I'm a little older than her and I've studied magic for longer, but her power is hundreds of times stronger than mine will ever be, no matter how hard I study, and she's capable of growing, of becoming even stronger, but she stopped, she's not achieved her pinnacle yet, not by any means. Goddessonly knows how powerful she would become if she continued studying." Willow looked down at her hands resting in her lap.

 

 "Well that's not likely toever happen, I've joined Magicians Anonymous, I'm in rehab. The magic nearly destroyed everything for me, and I'm never going to let it happen again" Erin looked at Willow, her eyes beckoning for attention. Willow looked up at her.

 

 "Willow, the magic didn't do it, the evil in the dark magic did it. White wicca magic is nothing like that, it brings ... a sense of well being, of being as one with the world, of being part of something really wonderful. The dark side is completely the opposite of all that, it's greed and pain and power and control. I think I know how you got addicted to the dark side. I ..." she looked earnestly into Willow's eyes. "... I think I see the taint in your aura, and I think I can feel something watching through it ..." She looked at Buffy. "... and ... I can remove it for you, that's my special power, I can empathise and repair and heal you." Willow shook her head in quiet resignation.

 

 "No, I won't be dragged into it again, I've caused enough suffering and paid too big a price for what has already happened, I'm not going there again ..." Erin shook her head.

 

 "You don't understand, thetaint is there, it's part of you now, and it's being used, it's like a ... a closed circuit camera, and someone's watching and waiting for you to slip, for youto go to sleep one day a little more tired than normal, a little more vulnerable ..." Willow looked at her, eyes questioning.

 

 "What do you mean?"

 

 "I mean something is usingyou, something knows all about you, and all of your friends, and now Becky and me too, something is paying attention to you and everything and everyone around you. And one day it will strike, when you least expect it, and it will hit you hard. Without your wicca power, you are completely helpless and vulnerable,and so are your friends, you will be unable to defend yourself, let alone anyone else. And you will become lost to the dark side." Erin eyed the other members around the table, her eyes showing her concern, she licked her lips and stared hard at Buffy, who looked back at her, silently pleading for her to help. Erin saw the look and nodded "If you won't do anything about that or let me do it for you, then you will always be a target, you will always be vulnerable, until  ... until the end. Do you know who or what could have put the taint there?"

 

 Buffy suddenly stood up, eyes blazing.

 

 "Son of a bitch!"

 

To be continued in:

 

Chapter 15 - You won't like me when I'm angry