Fic: "What I'm Here For." Rating: PG-13... (unbeta'd)

["A.M. Glass" <glasswrks@xxxxxxxxx>]

Title: What I'm Here For.
Author: A.M. Glass
E-Mail: glasswrks@xxxxxxxxx
Rating: PG-13.
Copyright: May 11, 2002
Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy The Vampire
Slayer belong to Joss Whedon, et al. The story belongs
to the author.
Spoilers: None.
Timeframe: Takes place during the fourth season of
Buffy, prior to Tara and Rileys appearance.
Feedback: Up to you.
Distribution: Feel free to take it.
Thanks: To my friend Debbie who allowed me to use her
as a sounding board.
Author's Note: This hasn't been beta'd, so if there
are any mistakes, feel free to point them out. Also,
it's angsty, which is really nothing new for my
stories if you've ever read them.

* * *

Willow looked up when the door to the dorm room
opened. She smiled when Buffy walked in. Hey Buffy&
everything go okay? she asked.

Same ol& same ol, Buffy replied as she took off her
leather jacket and tossed it onto her bed before
grabbing a bottle of water from the mini fridge they
had.

Did something happen? Willow asked as she shut her
history book and sat up on the bed.

Mmm& what?

Buffy whats wrong?

Seeing the concern etched on Willows face, Buffys
heart ached once more. She couldnt tell Willow what
had happened. Shed want to make it better, thats the
way she was. Willow was always trying to look out for
her, it was one of the reasons Buffy loved her.

She sighed.

Buffy had thought about her feelings for the redhead
and recognized them for what they were: love.

She was in love with her best friend.

The person who made her want to make the world a
better, safer place.

However, there were times when Buffy couldnt care
less...

When she was tired of being the Chosen One, but a
single glance in Willows direction gave her the
determination to continue the fight night after night.

Clearing her thoughts she answered shrugging her
shoulders, Theres nothings wrong Will. Im going to
take a shower and turn in if you dont mind. She
finished her water, grabbed her things and left the
room, leaving behind a slightly confused friend.

Heading down the hall Buffy knew she had to think of
something to say when she returned. If there was
something she knew about Willow, it was that she
wouldnt leave her alone until shed found out what
had happened.

She undressed, stepped into the shower stall, and
turned on the water to let it beat down upon her.

Perhaps it would wash away what shed done.

She couldn't believe it herself...

How could she tell Willow...

Tell her that the last vampire shed slain had made
comments&

Infuriating remarks about Willow.

How shed snapped&

How she hadnt merely staked the vampire, rather shed
taken her time beating him unmercifully, until the
vampire had actually begged her to stake him.

Even that she did it slowly.

Pushing the stake into him, inch by inch until she
finally shoved it through his heart.

How she laid face down on the grass, gasping for
breath, struggling against the urge to vomit in
response to her behavior.

How was she supposed to tell Willow that?

Tears coursed down her face, her body, finally
swirling down the drain, uselessly.

Umm& Buffy&

I& Ill be out in a minute Will, Buffy called out as
she hurriedly scrubbed her body.

Its okay Buffy&

Will& what are you doing? Buffy asked as she turned
around to see Willow standing there clad in pajamas.
Ill be right out. Why dont you go back to the
room, she said as she reached out to turn the water
off, only to feel Willows hand on hers. Youre
getting wet& she stated, blinking as the water ran
into her eyes.

I know& and its okay, Willow replied as she stepped
closer. Buffy& what ever happened tonight& its
okay. With those words she wrapped her arms around
the other girl, heedless of the fact she was being
drenched.

Unable to withstand the flood of emotions washing over
her, Buffys legs gave way. Sinking to her knees, her
body shook as she could no longer hold back the tears,
she clung to Willow like a lifeline.

Whatever happened it wont change a thing. Youre
still my best friend& next to Xander of course, she
added as she whispered into the blondes ear. I still
love you Buffy& always.

Oh God Will& dont let go& please, she pleaded, as
she held onto Willows body.

Never. I promise& Willow replied earnestly. She held
on to Buffy, letting the tears run their course, after
a few minutes she cleared her throat. Umm Buffy&

Yeah? she sniffled.

Getting kinda cold& not to mention clingy pjs.

Buffy couldnt help but laugh, I guess wed better
get back to the room.

That sounds like a great idea, Willow replied. Do
you think you can stand? she asked.

I think so& I& I may need some help&

Thats what Im here for.

They stood up slowly, once Willow was sure Buffy was
able to stand on her own, she turned the water off.
Reaching for the towel Buffy had brought with her,
Willow began to dry Buffys hair before wrapping it
around her friends body.

Thanks, Buffy told her.

Youre welcome& lets get going& Im starting to
puddle, Willow replied as she looked down to her feet
and saw the growing wet patch.

Im sorry&

Dont be& Im not, she said grabbing her hand and
leading her from the shower and back to their dorm
room.

Once inside, Willow led Buffy to her bed and sat her
down.

Buffy watched as Willow grabbed a towel and began to
undress, she averted her gaze as she heard wet
clothing hit the floor. She was still looking down
when she noticed Willows bare feet.

Time for Slayers to get dressed for bed, she stated,
holding the pajamas Buffy had decided to wear.

Nodding, Buffy stood up lifting her arms as Willow
first removed the towel, then gently lowered the pjs
over Buffys head, down her arms and the rest of her
body. Buffy allowed Willow move her as the redhead
pulled the blankets down and patted the mattress.

Smiling, Buffy sat down and slid her legs underneath&
Will?

Scoot over.

O-kay, Buffy said as she moved over.

Ah& better, Willow said as she slipped underneath
the covers.

Im okay now Will& you dont need to stay with me,
Buffy said as she turned her head to the right.

Indulge me& I need to be here, Willow said softly as
grabbed Buffys hand and squeezed it. Im not going
to ask you what happened. Obviously something bothered
you, and when youre ready to talk about it Im here.
And even if youre not& Im still here for you Buffy,
she said as closed her eyes.

Buffy blinked a few times as her eyes burned, Thanks
Will& she said haltingly.

She watched as Willow smiled.

Perhaps shed tell Willow what happened tonight&

Or not.

But for the moment, she basked in the love she felt
from her friend.

Whether or not shed ever acted on her feelings was up
to her...

But she knew that Willow would be there for her&

Always.

The End.

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