FF: Inner Struggle

["sam stoltz" <shadowmage_draco@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

Inner Struggle
by
Sam	

email: shadowmage_draco@xxxxxxxxxxx 
Disclaimer: Unfortunately I don't own them (sad face); Joss does. I 
am only taking them out to play for a while and will return them when 
done. 
Spoilers: all episodes and hidden subtext are open for grabs. 
Archive: Gary, Bill, Quin, Stephanie, all others feel free to post 
them just send me an Email to let me know.
Pairing: B/T 
Notes: <> indicates thoughts. Third installment in the Slayer`s 
Dilemma series, that started with 'The Slayers Secret', follows 'Of 
Love and Sorrow'. (Please don't stake me for this). Feedback is a 
deeply appreciated. Hope you enjoy
.....................................................................

Willow and Tara sat in the circle looking at each other in 
disappointment, once again another spell had failed to work. The 
blonde Wicca looked at her magic partner and sighed, "I don't 
understand, these spells should be working."

"Maybe were just in a slump."

"Maybe, do you want to try something simple, maybe a levitation 
spell."

"OK." 

They took each others hands and concentrated on the spell book that 
sat between them and began chanting, slowly the book began to float 
up into the air, they could feel the magic coercing through them as 
the book floated higher and higher making its way to the ceiling. 
the two Wicca then brought the book slowly back down to the ground, 
and smiled at one another when they had finished. 

After they had let go of each other hands Willow could still feel 
some kind of magical connection with Tara and found herself wanting 
to keep the mystical union between them going, "Could we try another 
spell?"

"I would r-rather talk."

"OK about what?"

"Buffy, I want to g-get her something special and.....since your her 
b-best friend I was hoping......you could help me."

Willow looked at Tara and faked a smile, "Sure, what can I do." <Why 
should I help you, you already have Buffy>

Tara looked at Willow and saw that she was hiding something behind 
her smile but couldn't quite make it out, "I w-want to get her a c-
charm bracelet...I'm thinking one with a cross on it....f-for good 
luck....when she is on p-patrol. Do you think....she would like it."

"Yeah, I think she would like it," replied Willow. <If she doesn't 
you could give her to me, I could make her happy. Hold it Rosenberg 
what in the world are you thinking, you need to get out of here.>

Willow stood up and grabbed her book bag, "Uh, Igottago, later."

Tara watched as Willow quickly rushed out the door, wondering what 
was going on with the red head.
......................................................................

Buffy reached over and took Tara's hand, "So how did magic practice 
go today?"

"Not to good...We only got one spell to work."

Buffy slid accrosed the floor so she was right next to Tara and took 
the blonde in her arms, "Want to talk about it."

"We only managed to get one levitation spell to work.....It's like 
there is something...off in our magic,....and"

"And what?"

"And...I d-don't think Willow l-likes me anymore."

"Buffy leaned over and gave Tara a series of quick gentle kisses that 
started on the girls cheek and ended up with a deep passionate kiss 
on the lips. "I can't believe that, how could anyone help not to 
like you."

Tara had to wait a second to get her breath back and let her heart 
beat slow back down after the slayers kissing barrage, "Your just 
saying that...b-because your my....girlfriend."

"No I'm saying it because it's true. If it will make you feel better 
I will talk to her about it."

"C-could you?"

"Yeah, now come here," replied Buffy as she pulled Tara into another 
series of kisses.
......................................................................

Willow sat alone in the dimly light dorm room as she had every night 
for the last three weeks since Buffy and Tara had come out about 
their relationship. She didn't know what to do anymore, she liked 
Tara, and liked doing magic with her but she couldn't get past the 
fact that it was the blonde Wicca who had one Buffy's heart. She 
couldn't blame Buffy for falling for Tara, after all the blonde was 
kinda of cute, and even though she wanted to blame Tara for winning 
the slayers heart she couldn't, if there was anyone to blame for her 
and Buffy not being together it was her, Willow Rosenberg, also know 
as the Wicca girl to afraid to tell her best friend that she loved 
her.

Willow had thought about leaving town for awhile to clear her head 
but had decided against it. Instead she was trying to cope with her 
feelings towards her best friend but each passing day it got harder. 
Every time she saw the two blondes together she wanted to run way to 
a corner and cry. Her mind was constantly filled with thoughts of 
Buffy, and it was starting to cause both her school work and magic 
casting to suffer, but she couldn't help it, everywhere she looked 
their was something that managed to remind her of the radiant blonde.

Willow let out a deep sigh, stood up from her chair, and walked over 
to the window. She then gazed out at the night sky, a fresh stream 
of tears rolled down her face as she thought about the slayer. She 
had reached the end of the line, she knew that there was no way that 
she could continue like this, something had to be done. 

Willow turned around and stared at Buffy's empty bed, putting on her 
best resolve face she walked over to the slayers bed and ran her 
hands accrosed it, "No matter what the consequences I'm going to 
find a way to tell you how I feel and try to make you mine."

The End (For now)