FF: Forest Daze.

["sam stoltz" <shadowmage_draco@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

Forest Daze.

By Sam

E-mail: shadowmage_draco@xxxxxxxxxxx
Disclaimer: Unfortunately I do not own any of the BtVS characters 
(extremely sad face), they belong to Joss. I'm only taking them out 
to play, it's for fun, and nothing more.
Archive: Gary, Bill, Quin, Stephanie, all other feel free to just 
e-mail me first.
Pairing: B/W of sorts
Notes: Shadow made another challenge so of to the woods we go. BTW I 
went back to the original challenge for part of this (I just couldn't 
resist, sorry) plus with a little help I threw in a one of my 
favorite writers into the mix. Hope you enjoy.

Beer foamy, feedback good.
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Sammy watched Giles rock slowly back in forth in his rocking chair, 
and wondered why in the world the owl was wearing a WWI fighter pilot 
uniform.

"You know Sammy I used to be a pilot back in the big one," Slurred 
Giles as he took another swig of Forest green white lighting.

"Ah, Ok," replied the Koala as he chewed on some newly acquired 
eucalyptus leaves.

"I remember one time me and my good friend Snoopy where sitting in a 
cantina in the south of France, it was drizzling outside, it does 
that a lot in France you know. Well we had just finished drinking 
another round of Sarsaparillas when General Horatio Eagle came over 
to our table. We both knew something was up by the look in his 
eyes. Well he looks at us and says that our old nemeses the Red 
Baron has been spotted in the area and that he wants us to go and 
try to find him. So of coarse me and Snoopy left to go find the red 
baron after having another Sarsaparilla. Well let me tell you that 
was one heck of a mission, we flew for what seemed like hours over 
the sky's of France looking for the Baron, then We spotted him.  
Snoopy swooped down to his right and I flew at his left, with guns 
ablazin`. The Red baron was pretty tricky though and managed to 
maneuver his way out of the attack, practically untouched, but me and 
snoopy weren't going to have none of that so we quickly closed in on 
him, as the Baron tried to make a get away. Let me tell you it was a 
sit to behold, Snoopy did a triple gator and swooped up from 
underneath the red baron as he did a barrel roll, I counters with a 
barrel roll of my own and me and Good old Snoopy opened up on the 
Baron. Then BOOM, flames burst from the Barons plane as we scored a 
hit, We saw the Baron eject as his plane went careening towards the 
county side in smoke. Yeah that was a heck of a day Sammy, let tell 
you that. Well after words me and Snoopy made our way back to the 
Cantina and closed the place down drinking Sarsaparillas......"
......................................................................

Several hours later after hearing countless war stories about the 
good old days in the RAF a traumatized Koala left the tree and 
Headed towards Buffy and Willows den, leaving the owl to sleep of the 
effects of the forest green white lighting.

The Bunny slayer and the Red fox had just introduced Xander and 
Cordelia to Willows shy cousin from the woods across the way when 
there was a knock at the door. Buffy got up and answered the door 
to find Sammy standing their mumbling something about White 
lighting , Sarsaparillas, Snoopy, and drunken owls.

She invited their new friend in and offered him a Fosters eucalyptus  
drink, that they Willow had found over the interforestnet. He 
plopped down on the couch next to Willow and other fox he didn't know 
and popped open the lid.

"Uh, Sammy your kinda in my seat," said the Bunny slayer.

"Sorry," replied Sammy as he slid over making room for Buffy next to 
the red fox, as he continued his bizarre ramblings.

Willow turned to the blonde rabbit, "What's wrong with him?"

"Not sure, keeps on talking about Snoopy, the Red baron, and drunken 
owls."

"Oh my, looks as if Giles got into the white lightning again and 
started telling war stories," Exclaimed the red fox.

"Ah, a fate worse than death, he could be traumatized for life now,"  
Replied the Bunny slayer as she smacked the Koala accrosed the back 
of the head.

"What was that for," replied the shocked Koala as he rubbed his head.

"Hey I needed to snap you out of the Giles stories induced trance you 
where in."

"I guess I should say thanks then, does he always talk that much?"

"Only when he's been into the white lighting," replied Willow, "By 
the way I would like to introduce you to my shy cousin from accrosed 
the way."

"Ah, a shy fox. Nice to meet you I'm Sammy the Koala."

"Ditto," replied the shy fox.

"Hey enough of the small talk, it's time for Animal Planet," 
interrupted the Bunny slayer.
......................................................................

"what's up with that Steve guy any way, I mean come on picking on a 
helpless crocodile like that and all." replied Buffy.

"Yeah he's a bad man," responded Willow as she nudged up against the 
blonde rabbit, "If he ever comes around her I'll bite him."

"Mabey we will get lucky and the crock will bite him," replied Sammy.

"We can only hope, I mean come on picking on helpless animals like 
that and what's up with those Kakis." said the Bunny slayer.

"Yeah they're pretty tacky aren't they," replied Willow.

"Danger, danger. Bad rhyme alert," shouted the Koala..

"Hey don't pick on her," replied the Bunny slayer as she punched 
Sammy in the arm.

"Hey what's he doing to that poor Kangaroo," shouted Willows shy 
cousin.

The group turned to the TV as the croc hunter and his team put a 
radio transceiver on a kangaroo so they could tract it, "That's not 
nice, maybe somebody outta put one of those things on him," replied 
the Bunny slayer.

"Hey I think I know that bloke' leave Fred alone ," Sammy shouted at 
the TV.

"Yeah leave him alone," shouted the Bunny slayer , throwing popcorn 
at the TV set.

"He so deserves to be bitten," stated Willow as her cousin nodded in 
agreement.

"for cryin' out load, it's the same thing every week. If you guys 
are going to get this riled up over the show going then just turn it 
off.." exclaimed the circus monkey.

"Take a pill or something Xander, were just having fun," stated the 
Bunny slayer.

Yeah but you're driving me nuts in the process."

"Ohh poor little circus monkey," quipped Willow.

"Don't feel to bad for driving him nuts, it's not like it's a long 
drive for or anything," replied the Bunny slayer as the two of them 
along with Sammy and Willows shy cousin broke out laughing.

"Hey, Xander better cover your eyes I think Steve's about to break 
out a scooter," replied Sammy, adding his two cents to the circus 
monkey teasing.

"What," exclaimed Xander turning towards the TV for a moment before 
realizing what was going on, "Hey wait a second, that's not funny"

Buffy fell off the couch laughing, "I can't believe you fell for 
that."

"Me either," added Willow as she joined the Bunny slayer rolling on 
the floor in laughter.

"Hey Will maybe it's because he has his fez on to tight," replied the 
shy fox, sending Sammy to the floor in laughter.

"Good one Shy," replied Willow.

"Heh, thanks."
......................................................................

The four of theirs laughter was cut short when Steve announced that 
next week he would be Traveling to the forest area outside of 
Sunnydale California. Everyone in the room grew quite as they 
listened to the infamous crock hunter talk about what he was going to 
do in Sunnydale.

"Recent sightings of a Koala of all things in the forest area of 
Sunnydale have been brought to my attention. We will be traveling 
their next week to try and capture this little fellow and return him 
to the outback where he belongs."

"Damn, first the WWI stories and now this. Can things possibly get 
any worse."

"UH, Sammy I hate to break this to you but that was a rerun of last 
weeks episode," replied Cordelia.

"Bloody unfreakin' believable, I don't want to go to the outback, I 
like it here," whined Sammy

"Don't worry your Koala self, we'll think of something," said the 
Bunny slayer.

"We could ask Giles and see what he thinks." said the red fox.

"Uh will your forgetting Giles is most likely fairly much smashed by 
now form all that white lighting, besides after the flooding of his 
bathroom, and the juggling incident, not to mention that a certain 
Koala decided that it would be funny to fill his toothpaste with 
Tabasco souse, you take all of that along with the nickname 
of `Woodsy' that Sammy pinned on him and Giles just might want to 
help the crock hunter."

"Good point, I know we could ask that badger that your cousin Faith 
is living with for help, after all he seems pretty smart."

"Good call Will," replied the Bunny sla7yer as she smothered the red 
fox with a series of kisses, "Let's go talk to Alex."
......................................................................

They all sat around the table at Alex and Faiths lair waiting for the 
Wise for the wise badger to get back from his daily roaming of the 
woods. "So cuz, you say that you say that some mean old crock hunter 
is coming to try and capture your and reds Koala friend."

"Yeah that's about the jist of it," replied the Bunny slayer.

Faith looked at Sammy and smiled, "You know it seems to me that you 
like to cause mischief almost as much as Alex."

"Yeah but at least I'm discreet about it," replied the badger as he 
walked into the lair.

"Hey I'm discreet"

"Since when is a Koala wearing sunglasses and bright orange underwear 
running around the forest in a drunken supper shouting that the sky 
is following discreet."

"Yeah, you should have known better than that," quipped the Bunny 
slayer as she snuggled up to the red fox.

I wouldn't talk so fast if I where you, I seem to remember that 
running right behind him wearing matching red bikinis was a blonde 
rabbit and a red fox who where insisting that the sky really was 
falling," retorted the badger.

"OK point taken, can you help us?"

"yeah, I do believe I can, but it is going to involve a trip to the 
costume shop."

"Cool, a disguise." replied the Koala.

"Not exactly, let me fill you in on what I'm planning."
......................................................................

Steve sat off in the bushes watching the trap he had set for the 
Koala when he heard something rustle from behind him, he slowly 
turned around and spotted two fox's just a few feet from him. He 
watched as the fox's looked at one another and appeared to grin. He 
eased back a little as not to alarm them, suddenly one of the foxes 
dashed at him and nipped him on the hand, He grabbed his hand and 
screamed as the other fox nipped him on the leg causing him to fall 
to the ground. as he laid their nursing his wounds he could have 
swore that he heard the two fox's giggling as they ran off into the 
forest. He rested his head on the grown for a moment to regroup and 
spotted a monkey in the tree above him, "What are you doing here 
little fella," asked the crock hunter

The monkey began climbing down to the lower branches of the tree and  
Steve did his best not to move as the monkey got closer. When he was 
in proper range of the Human Xander heisted his leg and relived 
himself on the infamous crock hunter, before shooting back up into 
the higher braches of the tree.. 

Steve got back up off the ground and began to try and wipe himself 
off when he heard the trap he had set go off and rushed over to find 
that their was a Koala thrashing about inside the cage. Wishing to 
get out of this forest before anything else happened to him He 
quickly picked up the trap and loaded it into the back of his truck 
and headed towards town. As the Crock hunters jeep pulled away the 
group of forest animals that had been watching him emerged from the 
brush.

"That was a heck of a plan," replied Sammy.

"Thanks," responded the badger as he wrapped a arm around the 
brunette rabbit.

"well what now?" asked Willow's shy cousin

"I say we celebrate, care to join us Alex." inquired Sammy.

"Thanks but no thanks. I have got to test a theory Willow told me 
about," replied the badger with a smirk.

"OK, suite yourself, we're headed towards Tadpole pond to celebrate 
not only Sammy's escape from the crock hunter but getting that weasel 
Riley out of our hair. " replied the Bunny slayer.

"Uh, guys I hate to bring this up but do you really think that Steve 
will actually ship him off to Australia without realizing that it's a 
tied up weasel in a Koala costume and not an actual Koala." asked the 
red fox.

A mischievous grin came accrosed Alex's face, "I think after what you 
guys did top him he is so anxious to get out of here he's just going 
to throw some eucalyptus in the crate and ship it off to Australia."
......................................................................

Faith let out a rather loud moan and banged her head on the headboard 
as waves of pleasure shot through her body. The badger crawled up 
next to her and gave her a quick peck on the cheek.

"You know Willow was right, it does taste like chicken," smirked Alex 
as the brunette rabbit snuggled up against him.



The End, hope you enjoyed this little trip into the woods.