FIC: Terra Australis Incognito 8/?

[CDRERamius@xxxxxxx]

TITLE: Terra Australis Incognito 8/?
AUTHOR: Tony McD
DISCLAIMER: All characters belong to Joss Whendon, Mutant Enemy, WB and 
others. This is for fun, not profit.
SUMMARY: A stranger with many connections to the Scooby Gang arrives and 
changes their lives forever.
SPOILERS: General Season 4. Follows it for a bit then it's an AU.
DISTRIBUTION: Anywhere is fine, just email me first.
RATING: M (Australian) PG 13 (language)
AUTHORS NOTES: Without conflict, there is no drama. ** thoughts. To my 
English friends, it is only a joke between good friends.


As Giles and David were coming to terms with their new family 
relationship, a rather angry and depressed Xander was returning from Buffy 
and Willow's dorm. Things had not gone well. Buffy was extremely upset and so 
was Willow for that fact. It seemed odd to Xander that Willow was so worked 
up about what happened. There was something more going on but Xander could 
not figure it out. Once, he knew Willow. Now she had become as unfathomable 
as a black hole.
Xander had explained the reason behind what happened at David's place. 
Well, he had tried to explain but, between Willow and Buffy hanging onto each 
other and crying and Buffy screaming obscenities at Xander and David, he got 
exactly nowhere with it. After five or ten minutes of crying and yelling, 
Xander was practically thrown out of their dorm.
Xander was angry at David for doing such a stupid thing to get Buffy 
upset. He was even more angry at Buffy and Willow for over reacting to what 
Xander saw as a minor thing. He was angry at the way that they had treated 
him, at some of the things they said. He was depressed because his two 
closest friends, who had been drifting from him for a long time, hardly 
seemed like friends at all now. Xander had gained a new best friend, it 
seemed, at the expense of two old former friends. He trudged off home to get 
ready for work.

Giles and David sat in silence, their emotions largely controlled. 
Giles gathered up his thoughts.
"Why didn't Albert tell me I was a father? I mean don't I have a right 
to know such important matters?"
"I was angry too when I found out. But I've had a bit of time to think 
about it. I think Albert did the right thing." David held up his hand to 
silence Giles' inevitable objection.
"Here me out, please. OK let's think this through. It would have taken 
Mum a while to figure out she was pregnant. Then it would have been a bit 
longer before she told Albert. By then you were back at Oxford and undergoing 
your Watcher training. He could tell that you were destined to be one of the 
greatest Watchers one day. You had just began to get your life back together. 
If he had told you about me, you would have left to take up a role as father. 
"You would not have become a Watcher, Buffy would have got some prissy 
dill as her Watcher, she would have been killed and we would be up to our 
armpits in hell, fire, and brimstone right now. So when you think about it, 
Albert did the right thing."
Giles looked at David, thinking about what he had said. Maybe he was 
right, but it still felt wrong.
"Logically I can understand his reasoning, but I still feel it was 
wrong." Giles said.
"I can understand that. But I think in the long run we both benefited. 
You became a kick ass Watcher who told the Council to stick it where the sun 
don't shine." David said with a cheeky little look on his face. "And I got to 
be raised in Australia and not in England."
"What's wrong with England?" Giles asked some what surprised.
"Try asking what isn't wrong with England." David smiled. "I mean you 
go and invent cricket. You create a nation of cast away convicts. They become 
a free and wealthy nation. They beat you at the game you invented. Hell, for 
the last 15 years, every time an Aussie cricket team came to England it's 
been about as one sided as Hiroshima." Giles had to smile at the friendly jab 
at England.
"Bloody colonials!" Giles implored looking to the heavens. They both 
laughed, comfortable enough to enjoy the friendly bantor. Giles noticed that 
Daivd's sense of humour was similar to Xander's. A bit drier perhaps, but 
quite similar. Again there was a comfortable silence as each man got lost in 
their thoughts.
"So what now? With us?" David asked.
"I don't know."
"Well, maybe it's best we keep this to ourselves for a while. Just 
till we get things straight between us." David sugested. Giles nodded.
"Yes, let's get a little more comfortable with this before we tell 
Buffy and the rest. I want us to be OK before we hit them with this."
"Yep, no sense everyone getting into a flat spin."

It had been a slow night at the pub and Xander was bored out of his 
mind. He absently wiped the bar top for the third time in ten minutes.
"Mate!" a voice called out. Looking up Xander saw David come in 
wearing an overcoat and a big goofy grin. Seeing the unhappy look on Xander's 
face, David sat on a stool and ordered a beer. Xander returned with the beer.
"What's wrong? Didn't things go well with Buffy?" he asked. Xander 
sadly shook his head. David grumbled in sad frustration. * Women, can't live 
with them, can't legally kill them.*
"Look, Xander. How about we blow this pop corn stand and kick some 
undead ass? Sounds good?" David asked.
"I can't, I'm working. See?" Xander said holding up his dish cloth. 
David looked around and saw Jack, the owner at the far end of the bar.
"Jack! Mate! How's it going?" David asked.
"Good, David, good. A bit quiet though tonight. What's up? You looking 
to throw another party? If so I'm your man." Jack said smiling. He genuinly 
liked the Aussie, especially since David had paid over $15 000 for the other 
nights shing ding.
"I'll let you know. In fact I would like ask a favour. Can I grab 
Xander so we can have a boys night out on the town? I mean it seams pretty 
quiet tonight." David said.
"Sure thing. You guys have fun." Jack said. Xander bolted out the back 
to grab his jacket. As Xander headed out the door, David rolled off a hundred 
dollar bill and slapped it on the bar. Jack looked at it stunned, them he 
smiled.
"You two be careful out there, it isn't exactly safe." Jack said.
"No worries, mate. She'll be right." David said as he walked out the 
door.

"Why am I out here hunting vamps with you?" Xander asked, regretting 
his earlier decision.
"Because you love it." David replied. The two had their stakes ready 
as they slowly walked down a back street. Xander stopped.
"What is it?" David whispered. Xander just pointed. There were two 
vamps rounding the corner and walking toward them. David smiled.
"Showtime." He said. The vamps charged them.
One attacked Xander while the other took on David. David sent his vamp 
flying with kick to the chest. The vamp got up but crumbled to dust as David 
threw his stake into the vamps heart.
Xander on the other hand was not going so well. He had dropped his 
stake in the fight and was just keeping the vamp from snacking on him. David 
saw Xander in trouble. * Note to self. Always carry more than one stake. * 
David grabbed the vamp and threw it down the street.
"You OK? Where's your stake?" David asked.
"I don't know, I lost it in the fight." Xander replied. The other vamp 
had picked it self up and started run run away.
"Come on, it's getting away!" David implored. Xander started out to 
catch the vamp when he stepped on his stake lying on the ground. His feet 
went from beneath him and he landed on his butt.
"What the..? Hey, cool! You found your stake. Come on let get him.!" 
David said picking up the stake and nearly dragged Xander down the street 
after the vamp. The vamp turned down an alley.
They entered the alley and were amazed that the vamp had disapeared. 
Walking further down the alley there was no sign of their prey.
"Maybe he ran out the back of the alley." Xander suggested.
"Nope. Dead end." David told him.
"It sure is." A voice said behind them. David and Xander spun around 
at the voice. Standing in the entrance of the alley were 6 or 8 vampires, 
including the one that they were chasing. David recognised another face.
"Oh shit." David groaned.
"You!" The vamp said. It was the mugger that attacked David the other 
night. The situation was bleak for Xander and David. The two of them had one 
stake and they faced a whole bunch of vamps.
"Do you know how to use one of these?" David said to Xander as he 
pulled out two objects from his over coat and handed one to Xander. It was a 
handgun.
"What? Are you nuts? Stakes, sunlight, fire, beheading kill vampires! 
Not bullets! You will just piss them off!" Xander near screamed.
"Just let them have it when I tell you to. Alright?" David said, 
raking the action of his weapon. Reluctantly xander did the same. He wondered 
if he should save a bullet for himself before the vamps turned him or should 
he save two bullets. The first one for David for getting them killed.
"Foolish human. Your toys cannot hurt us." A vamp told the two. David 
smiled a positively evil smile.
"You know what I have always wanted to say in situations like this?" 
David asked.
"What?" Xander replied.
"The path of the rightous man is beset on all sides by..." David 
started. Xander could not believe it. They were about to die and David goes 
all 'Pulp Fiction' on him. Xander jumped at the sound of a shot being fired. 
The vamp looked at the hole were the bullet had entered.
"Didn't work." The vamp said.
"Guess again, knob jockey." David replied as fire flared from the 
wound and quickly consumed the vamp. Everyone stood in shock.
"KILL THEM! KILL THEM ALL!" David shouted to Xander as he opened fire 
on the other vamps. Seconds later, the sound of gun fire died, leaving Xander 
and David with small piles of smoking vamp dust.
"Holy shit! What the fuck did we hit them with!?" Xander yelled at 
David.
"I call them Match Head rounds. I've been experimenting with them for 
a while. A little white phospherous, some titanium, a dash of sodium. They 
burn at about 3000 degrees C. Works pretty good on vamps, I say."
Xander was silent for a moment. Then a thought from his soldier boy 
time at Halloween kicked in.
"Aren't bullets like that banned by the Geneva Convention?" Xander 
asked. David looked at him like he was an A grade moron.
"Xander, I pretty certain that the Geneva Convention doesn't apply to 
vampires and demons. Don't you think?"
"Oh, right. Well, good. We wouldn't want to violate their human rights 
now, would we?" Xander joked, feeling like an A grade moron, as the two of 
them headed back to Xander's car.