FIC: Mind Games (6/6)

[angelina2006@xxxxxxxxxxx]

TITLE: Mind games (6/6)
AUTHOR: Angelina 
DISCLAIMER: All characters belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. 
SUMMARY: What if Willow had something she didn't want Buffy to hear 
during `Earshot'?
SPOILERS: Earshot ? some dialogue has been borrowed and the plot is 
basically the same 
AUTHOR'S NOTES: All feedback welcome. "Mochas?" "Yes please!"  
Thoughts are shown by <<?>> Wow, the last part?never thought I'd get 
here!!!!

Buffy stared at the door for a moment after Willow closed it. Then 
she looked at Angel; his dark eyes showed signs of confusion and 
apprehension. He was the first to speak.

"What did she mean about us needing to talk? Is there something you 
want to tell me Buffy?"

Wow, perfect opportunity. She hadn't expected him to actually ask 
her to tell him. But she was still unsure exactly how to phrase the 
words she knew would break his unbeating heart. Hurting him was the 
last thing she wanted to do. She cared for him deeply; she loved him 
and always would. Only now was she beginning to realise that since 
he'd come back from Hell, she'd stayed with him out of a mixture of 
guilt and habit. It had been easy to fall back into a relationship 
with him. It was familiar and comfortable. And dating other people 
had been too much of an effort. And with her rapidly changing 
feelings for Willow there was no-one but her that she wanted. Buffy 
realised that Angel was patiently waiting for her to reply.

"Oh, umm, talk, to tell you, I do have something."

"OK, that was almost English." Angel tried to lighten the mood.

Buffy smiled sadly at him. "Angel, you know that I love you, right?"

"I love you too," he said uncertainly, confused by her tone of voice.

"Yeah, but I don't think, I mean, the two of us, we shouldn't umm?"

"Oh?.I see." Angel looked down at his feet.

"What do you see?" asked Buffy.

"Buffy, I've been around for two and a half centuries, you think I 
don't know what a break up conversation starts?"

"Break-up sounds so final."

"But that's what's happening right?"

"I?I guess so?I mean yeah, it is, I'm sorry." She didn't want to 
patronise him.

"Can I ask what made you decide?"

"I?" She decided that the truth would be best. "There's someone else."

"Well, I can't say I was expecting that," said Angel, looking even 
more forlorn if that is humanly possible. "Do I know him?"

Buffy took a deep breath. "You know her."

Angel brought his head up sharply. The realisation dawned in his 
eyes. "Willow." It wasn't a question.

"Willow." Buffy confirmed, needlessly.

Angel shook his head in wonder. "I knew she was acting strangely 
earlier but I never?I didn't see this coming on your behalf at all?I 
take it this is a recent thing?"

"Well, yes and no?what do you mean `on my behalf'? You mean you?"

"I knew Willow had a thing for you. What do you mean `yes and no'."

"Yes, we've only very recently discovered that the feeling was mutual 
and no, I've been in love with her for a long time. Maybe longer 
than I realise myself. And you didn't tell me that she was in love 
with me?"

"I thought you'd be embarrassed or act differently around her or 
something."

"I'm glad you have such a high opinion of me." Buffy's voice was low.

Angel sighed. "I suppose I knew this day had to come. We couldn't 
go on forever. I just wasn't ready to admit it. You deserve someone 
who can be there when you need them, not just between dusk and dawn.  
You need someone who can watch the sunrise with you and see all the 
promise it holds, not just the promise of a fiery death. I think 
Willow is that person for you. I know that she'd do anything for 
you - she's proven that by doing what she thought you wanted, she 
restored my soul, even though she loved you herself. I'm glad I'm 
losing you to her, she's the only one I would give you up graciously 
to."

Buffy's eyes were bright with tears as she listened to Angel's 
words. "Really?"

"Yeah." He pulled her into a hug. "Don't worry about me. I'm a big 
boy now. I don't bite people who dump me anymore. Of course I've 
never been dumped by someone I love before." He pulled back and 
looked into her eyes. "But that's because I've never loved anyone 
before."

Buffy couldn't speak, tears spilled down her cheeks. She hadn't 
expected this to be so hard, to hurt so much. She held on to him 
tightly.

After several moments they parted with a platonic kiss which they 
both knew would be their last. Without a word Angel turned and 
walked out, leaving Buffy to throw herself onto her bed and sob.


In the kitchen, Willow heard Angel's footsteps on the stairs and her 
heartbeat quickened. She almost burned herself on the stove, causing 
Joyce to insist on taking over the preparation of the lunch.

Angel came into the kitchen and announced his departure. No one 
urged him to stay. All at once he started towards Willow who thought 
she was going to faint, but he embraced her.

"Take good care of her" he said simply, his voice thick with 
emotion. Willow nodded mutely and then found her voice. 

"I will." And she meant it most sincerely. He released her and fled 
out of the door under his blanket but not before Willow noticed his 
face was wet with tears. Giles and Joyce both looked at Willow.

"What was all that about?" asked Giles. Willow did her best to look 
clueless.

"I have no idea. Maybe I should go and find out." And she ran out 
of the room and upstairs.

She found Buffy wiping her eyes. All her previous feelings of 
jealousy were gone, replaced with a deep sympathy for both Angel and 
Buffy. She knew she had no reason to be jealous of Angel. Buffy had 
chosen her and for that she would be eternally grateful. (Especially 
considering that Angel had a great set of glutes.) She went to Buffy 
and put her arms around her. Buffy hugged her back, enjoying the 
warmth after the cold experience of Angel's embrace.

"Was it horrible?"

"Multiply that by a million gazillion."

"How did he take it?"

"Pretty well actually. He said he knew you had a crush on me."

"What? How could he?I never..I wasn't obvious was I?"

"Well not to me you weren't." Buffy smiled at her. "He says he's 
glad it's you I'm in love with."

"That's nice?and a little weird."

"I know, but anyway, that's the hard bit over for me, you've still 
got to go through it."

Willow groaned. "Don't remind me."

"OK then, forget about it, for today at least. Let's just have a 
together day. I think we deserve it."

"Darn tootin'!!" said Willow brightening. "So, do you have any 
ideas about what we could do for the rest of the day?" she asked 
coyly.

"Hmmm, I have a few." said Buffy putting her hand behind Willow's 
neck and drawing her in for a kiss. A kiss full of promise, new 
beginnings, the sound of a door opening?blind panic. Willow opened 
one eye, lips still firmly attached to Buffy's, and saw Joyce and 
Giles standing in the doorway holding trays of food. Willow abruptly 
pulled away from Buffy who eventually worked up the courage to open 
her eyes. The four of them stood in excruciating silence until Giles 
spoke.

"We've brought you some lunch. We'll leave it here and you can eat 
in when you're?finished." He laid his tray on the floor and made 
Joyce do the same. He then closed the door and urged Joyce down the 
stairs. She could be heard muttering "Bu?b?but?." all the way.

Buffy turned to Willow. "Oh well, on the bright side, that's two 
people we don't have to tell!"

Willow couldn't think of a single thing to say. So she covered up 
for her lack of words by kissing Buffy again. And again. And again.

THE END (Hurrah!!!)

That's all for now folks. I would really like to write the next 
episode (Choices) as I think I'd really like to play around with 
Faith (no not like that, get your minds out of the gutter) plus get 
some mileage out of the Willow kidnap storyline. But if I do this it 
probably won't be for a while. I'm also considering taking up the 
Buffy gets into magic and things go awry challenge. That has so much 
potential!!! But I want to thank everyone who has given me 
feedback. You have all been wonderful.
Thanks again
Angelina XX