FIC :: F4 (1/4?)

["C S Armitage" <soren_nyrond@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

TITLE: Fables, Fortunes, Foes and Friends ()1/4) 
AUTHOR: Soren Nyrond
DISCLAIMER: Certain characters in this part belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy, without whose inspiration etc.
SUMMARY: It's got Buffy and Willow in it; it's also got a Supporting Cast of Eternal NPCs.
SPOILERS: None since it bears no resembance to aired
AUTHOR'S NOTES: All nice feedback welcome. Chocolate cookies also accepted. Have fun. If you're really lucky, you may even recognise some more characters in later parts. God Bless


 
Fables, Fortunes, Foes and Friends - - Part 1

 

 

They had been offered the option: Sappho Plum could relocate them directly to Scriptator's centre of operations ("I've never been there, so I can't tell you what it's like or what to expect") or she could open a gate to the main part of his world ("Which is where you'd go if you were just visiting").

They had plumped for the letter and, after a luxurious bath, a hearty breakfast and some heartfelt thanks ("I'll see Symphony gets the sweaters back, don't worry. You won't have any trouble with weather where you're going: there isn't any - he saves weather for his creations, doesn't waste it on himself"), the Professor made her arrangements.

 

"Don't worry," she said, showing them a tall blue box, with doors on one side, "it's much bigger on the inside than the outside. In fact, be careful and don't wander off. Just come in, wait and then go out of the same doors."

Inside, the box was somehow the size of a small coffee shop, with a peculiar desk in the middle. There were doors leading away in various directions,but, mindful of the warning, Buffy and Willow stayed near the doors through which they'd come in. The Professor went to the desk, made some adjustments to what looked like the controls for a VCR, and then said "That should be it. Take care, and give Rupert my love."

Have we gone anywhere, Buffy wondered, as the doors opened again. But, instead of the ornate library, the scene outside was of a bustling street. She stepped out, Willow followed, and in the jostling they lost the chance tosee quite how and from where they had got there.

 

 

Wherever they were, it seemed a lot more familiar than their earlier locales. They were in a city, thronged with people. There were the usual sorts of buildings - but no traffic: everyone was on foot. Then they noticed that the people were of all sorts of races and types, and that the shops and buildings they could see didn't have exactly the bill-boards they were expecting.

Why was it necessary to advertise for doubles of people ? Why did the LifeAssurance office say "Be assured you'll have a life to come back to" ? And who or what was or were the 'Powers' which seemed to do a lot of businessthere: Powers Agency, Powers Procurement, Powers Equity ?

 

"What do we do now ?" Willow asked. "At least no-one seems to be trying tokill us."

"True, Will - very true. So why do I feel it's snap-test time on somethingI haven't revised lately ?"

"Hey, your study-buddy's here, soon as you need her."

"Again true, but what I want to study with my buddy most of all isn't on the curriculum just now." Then a thought occurred to her: "does that rowan twig spell of yours work here ?"

They found an unoccupied corner and Willow tried the spell.

"No - again, it's like Giles is everywhere and nowhere."

 

A strident trumpet-blast caught their attention, and they turned, to see everyone looking at television screen in the shops. Neither Buffy nor Willowcould actually read the screens, so they had to go on the conversations around them, to work out what was going on (not that that helped too much).

"Oh, not the Arabian scenario again ."
"I heard he needs more fill-in shots for the wide-screen version." 


"I'm sorry - I simply will not do riding for that director again. Scriptator is one thing, but the people he gets into do the post-production . "

"Oh, I'm keying in for it anyway - they say the Princess is the sexiest thing ."

"You are such a slut, Marcus - anyway, they'll be using the doubles by now."
"Oh, do you think ?"

 

Then suddenly great yellow bars passed across the sky, at right angles, andBuffy thought she saw one figure in the crowd vanish in a yellow-golden aura.

"And that's that," a voice said. "All three hundred places filled."
"Mustn't be anything major if there aren't auditions."

"Auditions ?" Buffy echoed. She turned to Willow: "Are we in one of Cordy's fantasies, do you think ?"

"If it is- " Willow began, then ducked lower. "Oh oh."

"What is it ?"

"Keep down," Willow murmured; then, a second later, "Okay, he's gone."

"Who was it ?"

"Someone who looked very like the Necromancer," Willow replied.

"Oh."

Then, looking over Buffy's shoulder, Willow noticed something else.

"Buffy - is it my eyes, or is there a pyramid, up there ?"

She pointed into the sky, and when Buffy looked, she saw that Willow was quite correct: there was indeed a pyramid, at the centre of the city. But italso appeared that there were more buildings, apparently floating in the clouds above the top of the pyramid.

"And I feel sure that's where we need to go, Will."
"I agree - but I can't think of a logical reason."

"Other than that it's there, you mean. But if you think about it, all of this has been like a series of playlets: an enemy to overcome, somewhere to reach, that's guarded."

"And how do we - - Oh, oh."

 

There were at the centre of a circle of unsympathetic faces.

"Can we help you ?" Willow asked.

"It sounded to me," one man said, "as if you were trying to analyse. Now you know that's forbidden."

"Yes," a homely woman, who could have stood in for an inn-keeper's wife, ora bake-mistress, added: "We're only the extras: we just play the parts we're taught - analysis is for the characters."

"I think we must have been sent to the wrong place," Buffy said, quickly. "My friend and I are new at this."

The trumpet-call interrupted her, sand everyone turned to look at the screens.

"Starship crew needed," the message read: "Must be fluent in 3 languages. Security grades especially required."

"Typical," a burly man said: "A job I'm qualified for, and it's a red-shirt."
"What's - - oh, yes." It had been a long afternoon Willow had spent at thescience-fiction fair one summer week-end. From it she had come away with a deeper understanding of how liking something can become an obsession, anda broad grasp of esoteric slang as spoken by obsessive fans.

"Don't ask," she told Buffy. "Just - - "

Suddenly a more urgent trumpet sound came on the air: "Unrivalled Opportunity," the sign read. "New Heroes required for Arduous Campaign. Open to all under level 5"

"Hey - a chance to go for character !" someone said.

"That's us," Buffy said, firmly. "How do we apply from here ?"

"Candidates should report to the Arbitrators immediately," the sign went on.

One of the young men smiled.

"Come on, I'll show you. It isn't easy when you're new at it."

There seemed a little unrest at this, words were spoken about it being "unfair" to help certain people when others had been loyal extras for years andnever got the chance .

"And yet I don't see you rushing to be a Hero," their benefactor replied.

"I got my level 6 last year, in the Swinge Wars. Too experienced."

"Then give these two their chance now."

 

The Arbitrators turned out to be in the pyramid, which went half-way to meeting Buffy's premonition. By the time they got there, with Stuart, their self-appointed guide, there was quite a queue, and yet it was only a matter of minutes before they reached the head of the queue and were going inside.Inside there was a clearly defined line of people, each with a clipboard.It seemed that each had a question to ask, and on the basis of the answer, each aspirant was directed onward. Stuart was peeled off, at some point,to join a different queue, but Buffy and Willow were able to insist that they were together.

Finally they reached an inner sanctum, where a greying man tried to take their details and, on hearing the "specialist skills" that they professed to have, shook his head.

"You aren't right for this job," he said. "But equally you're not extras -go through there." He nodded them to a different doorway.

 

 

And, abruptly, there were back in what looked like the same city. Except that this time there were fewer people, and they all looked very much betteroff.

There was a pyramid at this city's centre, too, and Buffy wasted no time inheading for it.

"How can you be sure ?" Willow asked, as she scampered along in the Slayer's wake.

"Because it fits the pattern," Buffy said. "That was for extras - this is for characters: the next step is to go higher up, and eventually we'll reach the man at the top, who will be the one we need to speak to."

 

End of Psart 1

part 2 to follow