FIC: My Slayer Lady (1/2 - probably)

[angelina2006@xxxxxxxxxxx]

TITLE: My Slayer Lady
AUTHOR: Angelina 
DISCLAIMER: All characters belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. 
SUMMARY: Buffy and Willow offer Faith some dating advice?but Cordelia 
intervenes
SPOILERS: None really, set quite near the beginning of Season 3 and 
doesn't fit in with the time line at all. Sort of in the same 
universe as Girls Interrupted (same relationships going on here)
DISTRIBUTION ? You want it? It's yours, just drop me an e-mail.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: All feedback welcome. "Mochas?" "Yes please!" 


"I don't know why I'm even talking to you two!" Faith stared intently 
at the two canoodling girls in front of her and then sighed in 
resignation. "You're not even listening are you?"

Buffy was standing leaning against one of the library tables, Willow 
was seated behind her on the table with her legs wrapped around 
Buffy's waist and her arms around her neck. Buffy glanced at Faith 
and realised that some sort of response was expected.

"We are listening Faith, honest." said Buffy. Willow stopped 
nibbling on Buffy's ear and also faced forward. They wore 
matching `very interested in Faith's predicament' expressions. Faith 
seemed satisfied that she had their attention.

"So?.what do you think I should say?"

"Well, that depends, do you want to go to the dance with Scott Hope?" 
asked Willow, still a little surprised that quiet, clean-cut Scott 
had asked wild-child and friend of leather Faith to the homecoming 
dance.

"I?I don't know, I mean he is a definite hottie, cute, tight little 
butt and all that but?dances really ain't my thing. And what the 
hell is homecoming anyway? Who's coming home?" Faith avoided the 
issue.

"You're gonna have to give him an answer Faith, you can't leave the 
poor guy hanging." Buffy advised.

"Yeah, well, I'm thinking I should just say no." Faith crossed her 
arms across her chest and looked like a petulant 6-year-old who was 
refusing to eat her broccoli.  

"Why?" Buffy wasn't letting her off the hook this easily. This date 
was Faith's chance to get more involved with the real world and do 
something other than slay vampires and bed guys.

Faith sighed and raised her eyes skyward. "I?I don't know?I don't 
really date, I'm a lay 'em and leave'em kind of gal. I wouldn't 
know how to act at one of these shindigs."

Willow and Buffy exchanged understanding looks. "Faith, do you want 
us to give you a few pointers?" Willow prodded gently. Faith 
shrugged in a non-committal way as if the thought had never entered 
her mind.  

"Whatever." She pointed a warning finger at them. "But this doesn't 
mean I'm gonna go."

"OK." Buffy studied Faith for a moment, thinking. "The thing to 
remember is to be yourself." She paused as Willow noisily cleared her 
throat and subtly, but vehemently, shook her head. "What I mean is, 
Scott asked you to the dance right? He wants to go with Faith, not 
some ditzy air-headed debutante. So go with that, and try to be a 
bit more?feminine?and we'll be fine."

Faith appeared surprised. "Hey girlfriend, I'm plenty feminine." To 
demonstrate her femininity she ran a hand down her body, accentuating 
her ample curves.

"Oh, there's no denying you've got all the right girly parts Faith ? 
I mean, anatomically you ooze `Woman' ? but?it's more?the way you 
act." Willow pointed out helpfully. Buffy was about to elaborate on 
this sentiment when she stopped short and turned to face Willow.
"Why are you noticing her girly parts?" she demanded. Willow blushed.

"I wasn't?I mean?I didn't look or anything?it's just they're sorta 
out there?in your face." Willow stammered. Faith smirked, taking 
this as a compliment.

"They better not have been anywhere near your face!" Buffy spluttered.

"Guys, guys can we focus here? Relax B, I told you before, chicks 
don't float my boat." said Faith, obviously enjoying her 
counterpart's jealousy.

"Hmmmm" Buffy narrowed her eyes at Willow before turning back to 
Faith.

"So, this actin' feminine thing, you mean like let him open doors for 
me and shit like that?"

Willow cringed. "Yeah? but also, you might want to cut down on the 
swearing and the crude stuff."

"What? You're kiddin' me right?"

Buffy shook her head. "It is kinda butch, and guys don't always like 
that?plus it's out of place at a formal dance." Faith rolled her 
eyes. Buffy sensed that she was about to call the whole thing off so 
she decided to change the subject for the time being.

"What were you planning on wearing?"

Faith seemed to brighten a little. "Oh, I got this kick-ass dress, 
it's black with these high slits up both sides and this great pair of 
knee-high biker boots."

"Ummmm?" Buffy and Willow began in unison. Further comment was cut 
off.

"Knee high biker boots to homecomng? Oh please." Cordelia swept into 
the library with Xander trailing in her wake. She came to a halt in 
front of Faith, sizing her up. "Are you taking fashion advice from 
these two?" She indicated Buffy and Willow with a dismissive flick of 
her thumb. They failed to nitice this as Willow was whispering into 
Buffy's ear all the ways she planned to make up for noticing Faith's 
girlie parts. Buffy was becoming rather flushed.

"Well? I uh?" Faith found herself unusually stuck for words.  
Cordelia had barely said two words to her since they'd met.

"No, no, no, no. If you want to knock Scott Hope dead you ask me for 
help ? not Miss Fluffy Jumpers over there." Cordelia continued to 
scrutinise Faith. "You've got to use your body to its full 
potential ? and a body like yours has plenty of potential." Faith 
felt strangely happy at this comment.

"We're going shopping for our outfits this afternoon if you want to 
join us." Buffy offered.

"I'd better come along to supervise this little shopping spree, can't 
have you two embarrassing yourselves at the dance can we?" Something 
struck Cordelia. She turned back to Faith. 

"Can you dance?"

Faith gave her a look of incredulity. "Can I dance? Of course I can 
dance ? you've seen me."

"Uh huh." Cordelia looked sceptical. She grabbed Xander and pushed 
him towards Faith. "Show us how you plan to dance with Scott."

Faith thought this was stupid. Xander was approaching her looking 
very keen to help her practise. So she obliged. She grabbed him and 
thrust her body against his so that every inch of their frames were 
touching. She started to grind her hips into Xander, and before 
long, another few inches came into play. Cordelia sighed. This was 
gonna be hard work. But there was no point in sending a boy to do a 
woman's job. Sighing again she separated the gyrating bodies in 
front of her and pulled Faith into a dance position, with her taking 
on the role of the man.

"Now, this is how you dance at a homecoming dance."

TBC