Re: :: Convergent Slayers (6/)

["C S Armitage" <soren_nyrond@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

> "I hate February," said Anne-Lise, a hopelessly psychotic author
> with a penchant for Buffy. "It always makes me feel blue. I dreamed I
> was a vase of salt in the rain; Every day, I'm more diluted."
> Soren blinked. "Meep," she complained. "Meep meep! More!"
> "Okay already," Anne-Lise sulked. "Just another chapter then."

OOh -- is this Fame I see before me, its pointy bit to my breast ?


Apologies (belated) for length & smut-heaviness of this -- bad day, needed
relief.

But seriously (and if you believe THAT ...)

> Willow waved her arms - no simple feat in the back of Giles'
> car. "I just don't think the vamps will take me seriously if I wear
> pink sweaters, or carry a Hello Kitty backpack."
> "But they look so good on you !" Buffy pointed out in a scandalised
> tone.

We are into seriously scary territory here -- query: What dice of damage
does a Hello Kitty backpack, faithfully presented as in holy symbol, do to
undead ?

> In the ensuing silence, Buffy stared out of the window trying
> to imagine a naked Willow on a Harley.

Isn't this Xander's job ??? [Not that I'm demarcating, but ..]

> "You're my Brainy Smurf!" Buffy shrugged. "Know what I'd give to
> wear a Brainy Smurf hat?"
> "Know what I'd give for a photo of you wearing a Brainy Smurf hat?"
> Xander added.

And, again, seriously scary -- Do we want little blue piping-voiced
elven-ettes scurrying through Sunnydale ?
Off-Topic: there was, in the UK, a band called the Barron Knights, who
specialised in rewriting the lyrics of well known songs of the time. They
did the Sm*rf song, as something like
[All rendered in "fick" heaqy London accents]
"Where are you all coming from ? / We're from Dartmoor, on the run"
[Dartmoor being one of our maximum-securitry prisons
"How did you work out your route ? / We followed the arrows on our suits "
"What were you in Dartmoor for ? / We borrowed a safe from the bank next
door "
"Why do you all talk this way / 'Cos we're from Catford, ain't we, eh ?"
[Catford being a "Sarf" London suburb, of the non-salubrious variety -- and
before Catfordians compalin, I've *been* there !!]

> Buffy gave her an appreciative smile. "After we rescue my mom, you
> and I are going to have to have a serious... dance... session. And
> talk things through!"

Can we have tickets, please ? Or a video (VHS for preference) ? (Smut smut
smut!!)

> "S'okay. Friends don't let friends choke."
> Willow smiled in the darkness. "We should make that our mission
> statement."

Amen.

> Xander eyed the new Slayer, noticing the blood coating her arms,
> and the way her breasts rose and fell despite the fact she didn't
> need to breathe...
> "Hai," Kyoko's voice brought Xander's attention back from the land
> of cleavage.

We so *neeed* the video !!!

> "You're missing the point," Tara fumed. "Willow's now a Slayer. This
> changes everything! Don't you understand, there's three of them! The
> power of three times three. One of them's a potent wicca!"

Der -- "power of three" -- der: isn't that a *different* programme ???

> "And use small words so we
> will all understand."

Now that's a mastermind of evil I can live with. Respect -- no -- but Live
With ...

> "Of course." Kobo replied. "My Slayer has an aversion to being
> destroyed by sunlight."
> "Oh yes, silly me. I forgot," said Giles, who hadn't. "Would you
> care for some tea?"

Nice touch -- though Kobo-sensei ought to have worked out some method, since
almost evrery other vampire these days gets serious daylight rompage when
the script requires.

> Buffy and Willow pulled apart when there was a knock on the door to
> their dorm. They'd spent a short while blissfully licking maple syrup
> off each other's naked bodies, and they were both now a little sticky.

Droll -- dribble -- video (or DVD if it has ultra-slow play on it ) !!

> "You didn't miss me?" he asked.

"Not exactly," the Slayer replied: "I hadn't started firing yet."


Regards, Soren, Lurker and Nyrond