Fic: Exit Music 1/many

["B. Harvey" <honouredfool@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

Title: Exit Music.
Disclaimer: All the characters of BtVS and A:TS belong to Joss and Co. 
I'm just messing around with them.
Rated R for coarse language, sexual situations and general wrongness. 
This is not a happy little tale so beware.
Feedback: Never hurt anyone.

Special Thanks to Mad-Hamlet for the mighty assist in the writing of this 
piece. Also to Shyfox, Bill and Kirayoshi for letting me bounce many, many 
ideas off their heads. OUCH.

Prologue:
"I'm so tired of all this bullshit. Don't you think that fate or 
destiny or these so-called "Powers That Be" that Cordelia is always telling 
me about would have a little fucking sympathy and NOT crash a drunk into the 
side of Buffy's car? I'm mean Jeeeezus Kriiist! Cut a girl some slack you 
bastards. Now Dawn is in a coma, Buffy's missing and Giles is crying again. 
Look, I gotta go, hurry up and get down here. All this crying is making 
my eyes leak. Bye Xander."
***
"I want you to do something for me?"
"What's that pet?"
"Turn me."
"Not in this unlife time, lil' bit would kill me."
"She's gone. Spike, I can't do it anymore, she's dead, and it's my, 
look, just do it."
"No." Spike was surprised to see Buffy pull a large knife from 
somewhere in her coat. If he had been around at the time he would have 
recognized it as the same knife that she had thrust into Faith once upon a 
June evening.
It didn't hurt as much as she thought it would. A pin prick tug 
against her flesh and then she felt the warmth of her life pumping out of 
her body and running down the front of a coat her baby sister had given her 
for her birthday.

Chapter One.

Buffy awoke with a jerk, her eyes drinking rapidly absorbing her 
surroundings. Before she could orient herself to her situation her body was 
shaken by an all-consuming consuming desire?to?to?drink?to gorge herself on 
blood!
"Thirsty pet?" Buffy looked up at the pale, gaunt face of her creator, 
trying to recollect what the hell happened. Buffy weakly pulled herself 
into a sitting position and screwed up her face in an effort to remember how 
she had got her. There was a light, and a lot of noise-She was jolted from 
her reverie as a heavy man dropped beside her. She had heard the song "It's 
Raining Men" before but this was ridiculous. Without thinking she reached 
out for the proffered wrist and sank her fangs into it. Teeth pierced flesh 
with ease, as they might have broken the skin of a fresh summer peach scant 
hours earlier, the warm, sickly sweet taste of blood filling her senses.
"That's a good girl, you drink that and you'll feel much better. You're 
one of us now." Spike murmured in her as he idly stroked her long blonde 
hair.
"Spike?" a very soft slurp accompanied Buffy's removal of her mouth from 
Mr. Breakfast's wrist. Spike frowned.
"You mean you don't remember?"
"No." Buffy sighed deeply. "Would I have asked if I did?"
"Granted." Spike paused to gather his thoughts and decide whether to lie 
or not. He went with not, probably better for him in the long run. "There 
was an accident. You were driving Dawn to a dance." Spike trailed off as 
Buffy's eyebrows shot up and her jaw fell. The floodgates of memory burst 
open, a car horn, the scream of twisting metal, bright white lights, pain, 
pain in the last moaning words of her baby sister, Buffy sat motionless as 
she drag-raced down memory lane?memories with sharp edges, memories that cut 
to the quick.
"Dawnie!" She screamed out the pain of loss doubling her over. "Dawnie 
don't leave me! I can't go?not after everything?Dawn?Dawn?" The tears 
sprang from her eyes, hot and bloody. Spike reached out and pulled her into 
his embrace, doing his best to comfort the former Slayer. "Don't want to 
live without you." She sobbed to herself over and over. "Can't live 
without you."
As Buffy sobbed she heard a voice call out to her, "I can make the pain 
disappear." It hissed, "Embrace me, let me in." Cold emptiness reached its 
clawed hand out to take its hold on her heart. She could feel the despair 
being pushed out, driven down by the burning desire to cause pain.
"No!" Another voice cried out in protest. "You will not have her! You 
must fight blessed one. You must grieve your loss." Buffy spun away from 
Spike's embrace, falling to her hands and knees, body wracked by spasms of 
retching up blood red bile. With one last hack she sat back on her heels 
and looked up at Spike.
"You did this." She wiped bloody spittle from the corner of her mouth as 
she struggled to her feet. "You did this to me! I just killed an innocent 
man because of you! Why didn't you didn't you go out and get some, some 
fucking pig's blood or something?" She lurched forward and wrapped her 
hands around Spike's neck. He looked down and saw blood tears leaking out 
the corners of her eyes. "It hurts so much." She tossed him back towards 
the bed, stumbled across the room and cried out again in agony. "It hurts!"
As she screamed Buffy heard the dark voice again, felt its cold hand reach 
out for her again. She felt the grief, the pain, the guilt, everything she 
wanted to leave behind, felt it all just wash away. Far away she could here 
Spike's voice.
"Killed him yourself?not such a nice bloke?girl in the park?great pain to 
myself?"
The part of Buffy that was the Slayer screamed in futile rage as the demon 
clamped its clawed fist around her heart. With a start she turned back 
towards Spike, a small smile creeping up the corners of her mouth.
"I'm bored now." Buffy flounced back to the bed Spike was still 
sitting on and flopped down beside him.
"What is it you'd like to do pet?" Whatever answer he was expecting, it 
certainly wasn't the one he got.
"I don't know," Buffy sing-songed as she pushed Spike to the bed and 
straddled his legs. "A little of this." She leaned into him and nuzzled 
his neck, lightly nipping as his exposed flesh. "Maybe a little of this." 
Spike let out a low moan as Buffy ground herself against his cock.
He grabbed her arms and pinned them to her sides, rolling such that he was 
now on top. "How 'bout a little of this luv?"
Buffy let out a lusty little growl as Spike increased the weight bearing 
down on her hips. It was more a battle for dominance than making love, 
clothes were shredded, skin was broken and mouths made to bleed into each 
other.
Vampire sex was a lot like I always imagined Klingon sex would be like when 
she watched Star Trek? with Xander. Buffy whispered to herself as she 
licked blood from a razor thin gash across Spike's chest. "Fuck me." She 
hissed in his ear. "Fuck me now." But he didn't. Instead he pulled away 
from her. Buffy let out a frustrated moan. "What," she paused to emphasize 
her annoyance, "are you doing?"
Spike lit a cigarette from his pack on the table and puffed thoughtfully on 
it before he answered. "This isn't you Buffy, this isn't what you want."
"How do you know what I want?" Her voice dripped acid as she crawled up 
the bed. "Are you a dead Slayer? Do you have two," she struggled for a 
word "two minds fighting for control of your body? Are you being torn apart 
inside by a struggle neither side will ever win? BECAUSE I FUCKING AM!" 
Buffy threw herself back towards the head of the bed. "Now get over here 
and fuck me because I want to feel anything other than what I feel right 
now."
"No." Spike was forced to duck as a lamp came creening towards his face.
"I fucking hate you!" Buffy leapt from the bed across the room knocking 
Spike to the floor with the force of her body. He stared up at her as the 
tell-tale ridges rose on her face and gasped in quiet pain as she sank fangs 
into the side of his neck and worried her lower teeth against the vulnerable 
flesh there.
"Ow! That's enough of that I think!" Spike grabbed Buffy's head and 
forced it away from his neck. He took a wild swing at her and ended up 
smacking her across a still uncovered breast.
"Fuck!" She quickly slammed her heel into the side of his kneecap. He 
popped her one in the face. She smiled and pulled away from him. "That's 
what I'm talking about." She gave a little smile as she wiped a line of 
blood from the side of her mouth. Spike grinned as the realization of what 
Buffy meant hit him. Figures someone so repressed as a human?He sighed and 
stood up, walking back towards where Buffy sat on the edge of the bed. 
There was satisfying smack as his fist landed in her gut. The coppery taste 
of his own blood oozing over his tongue nearly drove him to madness as she 
met his punch with an elbow to the face. With a resigned sigh he knocked 
her down to the mattress and crawled up to meet her. Hell, this was what he 
always wanted wasn't it?
======================================================================
Now, I know what you're all thinking but don't worry. Repeat after 
me "Trust in Fool, Fool will make everything better." There, that wasn't so 
hard was it? Thanks for reading, see you in a few days,

HonouredFool. List Jedi Master. Charter Member of GWBNS. CHAOS, spawn of 
Mischief and Mayhem. Founder of the Church of Taramonkeylove.

"As suburban children we floated in swimming pools the temperature of blood; 
pools the colour of Earth as seen from outer space...We would float and be 
naked-pretending to be embryos, pretending to be fetuses"
~~Douglas Coupland, Life After God~~

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