Re: Fic: Penance (7/?)

TITLE: Penance
AUTHOR: Regina
E-MAIL: brainysmurf16@xxxxxxxxxxx
SUMMARY: My own little epic.
RATING: I'll go with R overall.
TIMELINE: AU
DISTRIBUTION: If anyone actually wants
it, I'd be tickled pink to hear about it.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own these characters, If I did I'd be rich right now.

Penance

Hell? Massive. I was still holding out hope that I would just walk into hell and poof, there?d be Buffy, but no. Massive. Craggy, towering cliffs and rock formations loomed overhead. There was a sky, which surprised me; I had always pictured hell as more of a cave type thing. But, sky, dingy reddish tinted sky, which seemed to serve no purpose, as there was no sun visible. Everything was tinged red by the pungent smoke that rolled over the floor, and it was hot. I still to this day don?t use the _expression_ ?hot as hell?, because I?ve been there, and NOTHING can be that hot.

I, sweat pouring from my body, turned to see Michael, dressed in a suit, looking cool as a cucumber and regarding me with a smile on his face.

?Hot, Red??

?Do NOT call me Red. I?m fine.?

?Really, because from where I?m standing, you?re looking a bit flushed. Did the Sherack turn you on that much??

Speechless, I turned away from him, and began to make my way over the craggy floor.

?Uh, Red, you may not want to do that . . . .? Michael called, right as I fell into a rather deep hole in the floor of hell.

?Get me out, and stop calling me Red.?

?Get yourself out.?

?Ummm??

?Think. That?s all you have to do. As a mortal in hell, you have certain, how do I put this, freaky ass powers. Based on your little knife making trick, I?d also say you?re quite the little witch, and you know what that means!?

?Do I now??

?Extra powers! Ain?t hell grand??

?So far I?m saying no. Now HOW do I get out of here??

?Do you NOT listen? Think. Picture it in your mind. Hell doesn?t affect your magic, if anything, it makes it stronger. You just have to be careful. You gotta keep your balance little girl, it?s easy for your magic, and you for that matter, to turn dark in hell. Now come on, get out.?

I concentrated, and in no time at all, I was out of the hole. It made sense really, I knew I was capable of this sort of thing, I was just puzzled as to why I hadn?t though of it.

?You were distracted.?

?Hmm??

?You didn?t think of it because you were preoccupied with the whole initial ?so this is hell? deal. I can read minds.?

?Oh. What fun.?

?Neither.?

?What??

?I?m not wearing boxers or briefs follow me, watch your step,? a haughty grin on his face, he headed off into the smoke.

?Ok, I was NOT thinking that!?

~~~~

Much later, I looked down at my watch to see that it had stopped working. Puzzled, I turned to Michael, who was walking beside me at a leisurely pace, still looking very composed.

?No concept of time here, Red, what with the eternal torment and all. You?ll have to do without. Now, about that whole sweating thing you have going on, you know it doesn?t work for you right? You?re a pretty girl and all, but the damp look? Passe.?

?There?s not a whole lot I can do about it, sorry to inconvience you. It?s not like I?m enjoying it.?

?I swear, do you NOT listen? You must have been a what, C student in school? All you gotta do is think. Think of being cool, and you?ll be cool. Freaky mortal thing again. You?re not as limited by the confines of hell as those who reside here.?

?I?ll have you know I was like the smartest kid in school.?

?Sure.?

?Hmmp. C?mon ask me anything!?

?Yeah, well, someone?s an overachiever. C?mon, don?t dawdle, oh and look, you did the cool thing!?

?I did?? Without even noticing, I had cooled myself down. I was at a normal temperature, and much less sweat soaked.

?Atta girl!?

?Speaking off the people who reside in hell, how come I haven?t seen any??

?Because I haven?t let you. You?re not ready yet, little girl. That heart you got? It?d rip it apart. I don?t need you leading a crusade to help everyone in hell now do I? The people in this part are here because the deserve to be.?

?This part??

?Well, it?s divided. This may be hell, but that doesn?t mean we can?t be PC. Not everyone here deserves the same punishment. Your girl? She isn?t supposed to be here. She only is because technically, she committed suicide. But, as you know, she did it with a pure heart. The problem? Never really happened before. So, we didn?t quite know what to do.?

?So you put her in hell??

?Well, there is a chance for redemption and all.?

?Who are you??

?Huh?? Michael stopped walking, and for the first time seemed to not know the answer.

?Who are you? I mean, I know guide and all, but are you evil??

?Well......it?s more like I made some bad choices up on earth. Fell in with some real idiots, things went down in a bad way, and I ended up dead for it. So, before I could be judged, I had to prove I really had good intentions.?

?So. . . me??

?Yeah, you. You?re my chance for redemption.?

?Great, now I gotta save two people.?

?Hey now, I didn?t ask to be your guide, you should be lucky you even have one. You know how many people get guides? None. The few nutzo?s who are crazy enough to come in here, they have no one. You, you?re special, because you?re here for your girl, and you?re soul mates. She needs to be back up there, things are gonna get real bad if she doesn?t. The only way she can is if you prove yourself worthy and get her. Now you want to keep whining and insulting me, go by yourself, but I promise you one thing, you won?t last one minute. NO mortal has ever gone into hell and come out alive. Now you want to take your chances??

?No.?

?Ok then, come on.? I began to walk alongside Michael, who was looking at me curiously.

?What??

?What?s the sex like??

?Uggh.? Hell was not going to be fun.