FIC: The Flow (8/10)

[stefzis@xxxxxxxxx]

Hiya all
Well this has take an wee bit longer then planned but as Cilia might 
have told you I have been on vacation. So without further ado I give 
you The Flow finalé
Catch you on the flipside,
Stef

Title: The Flow
Chapter 7: The Priest's Gambit
Rating: R
Disclaimer: Joss Whedon owns it all right?
Note: Special thanks to Cheryl and Cilia
Summary: Set after the serie's end, kind of hard to put into words 
really. Xander is onto something, but it might just cost him is life 
again.

Chapter 7: The Priest's Gambit

I watch Willow take off from the windowsill from where I stand under 
a solitary oak on the mansion's lawn, not the best of ideas in a 
thunderstorm I know. My hand goes to the collar I wear around my 
neck, the mark of office and just about the only thing that has kept 
me sane through the years. Many turn to the bottle or just go plain 
crazy when faced with the true reality of the world. I turned to God, 
because there was nobody left to turn to at that point. That's right 
Willow isn't the only one here with a dark little secret. We have all 
fallen at one point or the other and I believe that goes to prove 
that we are still human after all. 

My fall came deep in the Amazon, threats to the world can crop up in 
the strangest places you know, but I'm getting sidetracked. I was 
living among a tribe there, having my Medicine Man moment in a way: 
Hunting, climbing, getting stoned out of my mind on some plant that 
doesn't have a name in the western world. Best of times, before 
Willows' ordeal and Buffys' firm belief in her own hype. I spread my 
hands and take off after Willow, surprised, well what's the good in 
being an agent of G.O.D. if you don't get to enjoy some of the perks. 

I have my faith, it's my corner stone and I have hope, right now 
those are the only two things going for me in case Willow notices me. 
I have a calling, I help people, it's what I do, and it is what I 
have always done. Sometime people don't want my help, but I keep on 
trying. I'm the persistent sort I guess. The evangelist in me is 
screaming for me to go tear into Buffy for doing what she does to 
Willow, but the problem doesn't really lie there, I know that Willow 
could kill all of us with a stray thought or two. Not even Buffy, 
despite her strength and durability, wouldn't stand a chance. You see 
I know how Willow thinks, she plans and manipulates things after all 
isn't that what magic is all about, reaching behind the world and 
manipulating things so that things change? Isn't that what we as the 
Four do every single day? Willow has a plan, a plan that nobody but 
she knows about and that frightens me.

I never felt it coming, but I knew at the moment that I had failed, 
despite my good intentions, despite my hope and despite my faith I 
had failed. Not that I blame her I had stumbled upon her in her most 
private moment. She sat along in a forest clearing, naked and 
surrounded by a nimbus of pure white light. The third pleasure, oh 
yes I know more than I let on. Here she comes to escape into the way 
things used to be, before all the pain and all the suffering. 

She just opened her eyes and I felt the light, so pure and so 
innocent at its core. I fell to the ground like a rock and the last 
thing I thought before I made contact with the wet earth was my hope 
that all things would work out in the end. But it won't work out that 
way. In the end my journey has just been a priest's gambit for a 
witches soul. Being close to death your mind becomes very clear in 
that last instance and in that final moment it all becomes clear 
Willows' plan and the Flow becomes something more than just an 
invisible force. I understand now.

Oh I didn't die on a rainy night, that came later, Willow despite all 
her heartlessness and pain is at heart a good person or at least 
that's what I hope. But what I know and what I hope for are two 
different things. I know that she just wants me around at the end. 
After all what good is a dead priest, a dead plaything?

To Be Continued...