Snippet: Feeling Musical 3

[buffythebushkangaroo@xxxxxxxxxxx]

Buffy: Well, look at you! Such a poor 'Big Bad',
Skulking around being all leather-clad.
It would be funny, if... you weren't so sad
Dressed up like some 60s revival fad.

Spike: Oh screw you, bitch! I'm gonna do what I like.
I've got this cool leather thing going now, and I've got a 
bike!
If you can't deal, well then, just take a hike!
I'm a cool mutherfucker... What's there not to like?

Buffy: Let me guess, you're Mr. Sexual Frustration,
All stressed out by your vampiric castration
Can't get it up, 'cos you've got no heart to pump...

Spike: I've tried Bitrin, Viagra... and well, yeah, I'm stumped...

Buffy: And you just sunk even lower in my estimation!

Spike: You slept with Angel, you sucked out his soul,
You gilded his lily, you leaped on his pole.
You even sent him to Hell, although that... wasn't your goal...
And yet you won't love me though I'll make you whole...

Buffy: Don't make me spew! I've hated you from the start!
There's someone else I hold... dear in my heart...
Gotta keep it a secret, or it'll force us apart...
And she'd kick your ass in seconds with the use of her Arts!

Spike: You're in love with Tara? Well this is so new!
I could kick her ass just for something to do.
Boot her bony little bum 'til its all black and blue!
Grind her bones to paste, turn her face into glue...

Buffy: Leave *that* bitch to me! That problem is mine!
Thanks for your offer, but I must decline.
It'd make Willow cry, their hearts are still... intertwined,
But I hope, one day, Wills'll be my Valentine!

Spike: I gotta get out of this town, gotta leave without a trace,
Gotta scuttle for cover like some big disgrace,
Gotta try and forget your so-perfect face
'Cos I can't spend another day in this place.

Buffy: Fine by me! You won't see me shed no tears!
Don't let the door hit you when you disappear!
And just to be one hundred percent clear...
I'll stake your ass if I see you once again here!