Fic: Crimson Love (1/?)

[Jenny Dapper <dap311@xxxxxxxxx>]

Title: Crimson Love (1/?)
Author: dap311 (dap311@xxxxxxxxx)
Pairing: B/W 
Rating: R
Disclaimers: Buffy and Willow belong to Joss and
Mutant Enemy. 
?Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely? is property of
the Backstreet Boys. 
Spoilers: Some general 3rd season spoilers; Faith is
now in the picture; Oz is not and never has been.
Feedback: Yes, please- it is my crack.
Summary: Sequel to "Fascinating New Thing." Buffy and
Willow go through some difficult times and Faith isn?t
making things any easier.
Distribution/Archive: Just ask.

?So many words for the broken heart 
It's hard to see in a crimson love 
So hard to breathe 
Walk with me??
--- Backstreet Boys 
?Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely?

Previously in ?Fascinating New Thing:?

She began walking through the headstones slowly,
checking for fresh graves while keeping her ears alert
for any noises around her. Buffy didn?t hear the
figure approach from behind, though, and wasn?t aware
of the new presence until it grabbed her around the
waist and spoke into her ear.

?Hey, B. Back for more??

-------------------------

Buffy stiffened when Faith put dark lips up to her
ear. She tried to move away, but Faith had a tight
grip on her waist and was the only girl strong enough
to hold her in place. Instead of struggling, Buffy
took a deep breath before responding to the Dark
Slayer.

?What do you want Faith?? Her tone was exasperated
and tired, not wanting to deal with the unstable
Slayer right now. 

?Ah, c?mon B, is that any way to respond to your
lover?? Faith nipped at Buffy?s ear after she said
this, dragging her teeth across her flesh before
sucking gently on the end. 

---------------------------

Willow sat on Buffy?s bed, stunned. She kept hoping
that the last day had been a dream, and that she would
wake up in Buffy?s arms any minute now. But, she knew
that wasn?t going to happen. She had really messed up
this time and didn?t know how to fix it. Willow had
an overwhelming need and want to hurt herself at that
moment, to punish herself for what she was putting
Buffy through, for how she was treating the woman she
loved most in the world. Some part of Willow knew she
shouldn?t do it, but that part was small and was
losing a battle with her darker side that not only
want to cut herself, but wanted to keep hurting
herself. Willow wished pain upon her body to match the
pain in her soul and to match the hurt she had caused
Buffy. 

The redhead got up and walked out of Buffy?s room,
down the stairs, and into the kitchen. The house was
dark, but she didn?t bother to turn on any lights; she
didn?t need to see to do what she wanted to; it had
become second nature for her after awhile. The
initial cut, the pain, the blood, the clean up. She
headed directly to Mrs. Summers? junk drawer. Willow
knew Buffy?s mom had a utility knife somewhere in the
drawer to open boxes with. It was probably dull, but
it would have to do. 

-----------------------------------

?What?! I am NOT your lover, Faith.? Buffy pulled
out of the Dark Slayer?s arms, away from the warmth of
her lips. ?I don?t know where you got that idea, but
it needs to get gone before I turn around.? Buffy
stood facing a grave stone, her back still turned to
Faith, arms crossed over her chest, a muscle twitching
in her clenched jaw. To the an observant bystander,
the hostility between the two women would be almost
blinding. 

?Aw, B. You know where I got the idea. You
practically shoved it down my throat this afternoon. 
Don?t tell me you?re gonna deny trying to jump my
bones after we hit that nest?? Faith?s voice was
filled with self importance and victory, figuring she
had Buffy on this point.

?I didn?t shove anything down your throat. You
attacked me. All that hungry and horny crap. That?s 
YOUR sick deal, Faith. Not mine. And it was one
kiss. One. And I didn?t like it. You suck at
kissing.? Buffy still hadn?t turned around, and in
fact stance got firmer as she spoke. ?I don?t like
you, Faith. We fight together, we work together, we
hunt together. That?s it. There is nothing else I
want to do together with you. Not talk, not be
friends, and definitely not kiss.? 

?It may have been one kiss, but you were wet, B. I
felt it.? Buffy could hear the smirk in Faith?s tone,
even if she couldn?t see it. A shiver of revolt swept
up her spine at the memory of Faith?s hands on her,
touching her where she only wanted Willow to touch
her, where she only wanted to be touched out of love. 
And now that first touch was gone. To Faith of all
people. At that moment Buffy regretted that she had
not allowed Willow to make love to her, saying that
the night was all for the redhead. She wished that it
had been Willow?s hands today, not Faith?s. Not rough
and demanding. But, now? now she didn?t? know if that
would ever happen. Buffy wasn?t sure what was going
to happen between her and Willow. 

?You didn?t make me wet. You could never turn me
on.? Buffy said this through her clenched teeth,
barely above a whisper, knowing that Faith?s slayer
hearing would catch every syllable. It wasn?t quite a
lie, but it wasn?t the truth, either. Yeah, she had
been wet when Faith reached down between her legs
earlier, in her pants and underwear. But, it wasn?t
Faith who had done it. When the Dark Slayer had
kissed her, Buffy had closed her eyes, not wanting to
fight, hoping it would be over soon. And when she
closed her eyes she thought of Willow and her mouth,
imagining it was Willow?s hand on her breast, not
Faith?s. It was only when the shock of Faith?s other
hand down her pants had Buffy opened her eyes in
horror, repulsed by what was happening. 

?Whatever. There wasn?t anyone else there. Fang boy
wasn?t around to give you a happy. Just you and me,
B. I?d say that I turned you on like a hot water
tap.?

?Oh, god, Faith. You are so lame. And you really
have no idea about anything.? Buffy spun around at
that instant, swinging instantly at Faith who had
stepped closer with the insult, intending to take
Buffy by the waist again. Before the Dark Slayer
could reach Buffy, though, she was on the ground,
knocked off her feet at the force of the blow. Buffy
stood over her, fists clenched, her face red and
angry. 

?Don?t touch me. Ever. Don?t come near me unless it
is to pull a vamp off of me. Stay away from the
library. Stay away from my house. And stay away from
my friends. If you tell them anything, and I mean
ANYTHING, you?re going to wish I kicked your ass
harder tonight.? With that, Buffy turned and stalked
out of the graveyard, more upset than when she had
entered twenty minutes ago. 

-------------------------------------

For the first time in recent history Willow?s more
logical side won out in the battle over hurting
herself. She had put the utility knife away after
sitting in the kitchen for 5 minutes, thinking, the
blade out but nowhere near her skin. She was thinking
about Buffy, and what she could do to show her that
she was sorry. 

?I need to go find her. I can?t just let her go,?
Willow said aloud, to no one in particular. She put
the knife back in the drawer and headed back up to
Buffy?s room. A couple minutes later she descended
the stairs and quietly left the house. She didn?t
know how she would find Buffy, but she figured the
Slayer had gone towards one of the grave yards on
instinct, and probably the one closest to the
Rosenberg house. So, that?s where Willow?s feet began
to take her, though her brain had yet to figure out
just what she would say or do once she found Buffy. 

After about 10 minutes Willow came up on the
graveyard. It was very dark with no moon that night
and no street lamps one she entered through the
cemetery gates. While she was allowing her eyes to
adjust to the dark, Willow listened carefully for any
sound of the Slayer or vamps. She hoped she wouldn?t
run into any evil creatures because she?d forgotten
any type of weapon. The redhead?s ears perked up when
she heard voices close by, over by one of the old
mausoleums. She was surprised to hear Faith?s voice,
though. 

?Whatever. There wasn?t anyone else there. Fang boy
wasn?t around to give you a happy. Just you and me,
B. I?d say that I turned you on like a hot water
tap.?

Willow?s hands went straight to her ears, not wanting
to believe what Faith was saying. Faith and Buffy? 
What had Buffy been keeping from her? Willow didn?t
hear the rest of the conversation; too stunned and
hurt she forget any reasoning that had brought her to
the cemetery in the first place and ran blindly back
towards the Summers house. 

-------------------------------------------

As Buffy was storming out of the graveyard she
thought she caught a glimpse of red hair a ways ahead
of her. Quickening her step, the Slayer tried to keep
that hair in sight, certain it was Willow and suddenly
worried at what she overheard. Buffy didn?t know what
she would say once she caught up to Willow, though, so
instead of running to her and trying to explain away
what had just happened, she hung back bit, staying
quiet, but keeping an eye on her friend to make sure
no vamps jumped out suddenly. Once they reached her
street Buffy watched as Willow quietly snuck back into
the house. Not ready yet to face her, the Slayer made
her way up the front steps and sat down at the top. 

Buffy sat on the top step with her elbows on her
knees, her head in her hands. The whole day had been
horrible. She didn?t know what to do about Faith,
what to tell Willow. She hadn?t planned on telling
anyone, ashamed that she had let it happen, and
disgusted with herself. She should have stopped
Faith, but hadn?t been able to. And she didn?t know
if it was because she was so shocked and scared or if
she secretly wanted it. How would she explain that to
Willow, especially after the fight they had tonight? 
Buffy was lost and tired. She wanted to desperately
to talk to someone, but the one person she would go to
wasn?t an option right now. 


TBC...

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