FIC: Desperate Measures 3/3

["wizathogwarts" <mcronin24@xxxxxxxxx>]

Title ? Desperate measures.
By mike (mcronin24@xxxxxxxxx)
SPOILERS: Everything.
RATING: R. female/female intimacy. 
DISCLAIMER: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and all characters belong to 
Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and Fox. 
FEEDBACK: Constructive comments are encouraged. 
SUMMARY: (Buffy/Willow) Buffy and Willow are both devastated over 
their battle and the loss of their friendship. Now they have a 
chance to resolve their differences.
Authors Notes: What happened after all the BS of the season from 
hells finale. Just my take on one possible scenario.

Dangerous measures
Chapter 3
Passing time.

Willow was all set on having some fun until she saw Buffy's painful 
transition across her face. She leapt forward to catch her friend 
as she collapsed. Pulling her out of the pouring water, she gently 
cradled her body. Stroking Buffy's cheek and gently encouraging the 
unconscious girl to wake up.

"Buffy, come on Buffy. You're scaring me. Please wake up." Willow 
repeated over and over, rocking and rocking, stroking and stroking.

"Ohhh," Buffy moaned as her eyelids began to flutter. "What 
happened to me."

"I don't know. You were smiling and then your face went through 
these terrible expressions that looked really painful and then you 
fainted. But how do you feel right now?" Willow asked with her 
hand still cupping Buffy's cheek as hazel and green eyes were locked 
on to each other.

"I think I'm OK. I remember thinking that you looked like you 
wanted to have some fun playing in the water. And I was thinking 
how much fun it would be and then this voice started speaking. It 
was really low but insistent. It was telling me all these awful 
things and the voice got louder and louder telling me the world 
would end over and over and that's the last I remember." Buffy 
hadn't moved and was still captivated by the green eyes above her.  
Then she realized that she was naked and Willow was naked and 
holding her so lovingly. Buffy was relishing how wonderful it felt 
to be this close to Willow and she could feel herself flush and 
begin to tingle all over as she became more and more aware of the 
beautiful soft body pressed so close to hers. That's when the voice 
started again. The moment she heard it, she broke from Willow's 
arms and stood up.

"Willow, I think I'm going crazy." Buffy said as tears began to roll 
down her cheeks.

Willow heard the fear in her friends voice and stood up and began to 
approach her. 

"Stop, don't come any closer. Being near you cause's the voice in 
my head." Buffy spoke as she held up her hand palm out in a stop 
signal.

"How could I cause the voice? We've been close before. Why now 
Buffy?" Willow's voice was strained.

"It's not you being close exactly. It's more what I'm thinking when 
you're close, especially naked and close." The last few words were 
barely a whisper and Buffy had lowered her head in embarrassment.

"We need to talk about this Buffy. Something strange is going on 
and we need to get to the bottom of it. But let's get some clothes 
on and go over to the kitchen where we can talk over a soda or 
something." Willow grasped the essentials of the situation just as 
Buffy finished speaking. She had a near epiphany of what her friend 
must have been thinking when the voices bombarded her mind but knew 
to get to the bottom of this they needed to move things where any 
stimulation could be kept minimized.

"That sounds like a great idea. Think Anya left us any clean 
clothes or does she want us prancing around naked all the time?"  
Buffy asked without much hope in her voice.

"I noticed a button on the wall next to the bench. Let see what 
happens when we press it." Willow said with a flare of adventure.

The both approached the wall. Buffy stood back by the bench as 
Willow pushed the large gold button. With a quiet woosh, the wall 
folded up to reveal a shallow closet with hanging clothes and some 
things on a few shelves. Both girls immediately discovered the 
panties were all thongs. No pants, just very short, low riding 
shorts. Tops were bare midriff halter's and tee's. The hanging 
clothes were all sheer, low cut or some other form of revealing.

"I am so going to kill Anya. Have you found any bra's yet?" Buffy 
looked at Willow while holding a sheer black blouse against her 
body, her breasts barely hidden creating an alluring sight that 
instantly drew Willow's gaze, a gaze she couldn't break until Buffy 
saw the salacious look on the red heads face.

"Sorry." Buffy exclaimed, turning quickly away from Willow's 
piercing eyes.

"Oh goddess Buffy, I'm so sorry but you just looked so lookably 
delicious I couldn't help myself." Willow frantically exclaimed.

"It's OK Will. Any other time and I would have been very flattered 
but right now I can't afford to go there." Buffy soothed her friend 
without turning. "Lets just get something on that isn't see 
through."

Both girls quickly dressed in nearly identical outfits of shorts and 
halter tops. Only the colors were different.

They both finally felt comfortable looking at each other and 
chuckled at each others appearance.  

"We look like hookers. Can I hold her while you kill her?" Willow 
asked shaking her head.

"I'd be honored." Buffy smiled gently.

They then headed over to the kitchen where they found coffee all 
made. Fixing themselves each a cup, they sat at the intimate table 
for two.

"Buffy, I know this is going to be difficult for you. But we both 
need to be open and honest or we are going to be here a very long 
time. In addition, I suspect that someone has been messing with 
your mind. I think it's past time to uncover this. So please tell 
me about this voice. Does it sound like anyone you know and what 
does it say." Willow spoke encouragingly while restraining her 
desire to reach out and hold her friends hand.

Buffy took a deep breath and then another, letting it out slowly.

"The voice is almost familiar, but it's muffled so I can't be sure 
except that it's a man's voice." Buffy got out the easy part, 
dreading the next.

Willow waited patiently for Buffy to proceed. She watched those 
beautiful hazel eyes look down into her coffee before proceeding.

"I would start to have thoughts about you. They are nice thoughts 
but the voice tells me that I'm disgusting. It tells me that I am 
only attracted to men and that I desire only men. Then if I try to 
argue or keep thinking thoughts, it tells me that a slayer can't be 
with a woman or the world will end. Then it just kept repeating, be 
with a woman and the world will end. Louder and louder until a 
blanked out." Buffy gave a quick sigh at the end.

Willow gathered her thoughts. Buffy had filled in the gaps and she 
knew her original suspicion was right.

"This voice, had you ever heard it before we came here." Willow 
asked sweeping her arm around.

Buffy glanced at her and then looked down again. "Yes, there have 
been other times."  

"Do you recall the first time you heard it?" Willow asked softly 
wanting to keep the tone even and steady.

"I think so. But it was a little different the first time. It was 
a soft whisper, offering a suggestion, encouragement. It was at the 
bronze. Just before Xander tried to have a fling with the bug 
teacher. Do you remember the night when Angel gave me his leather 
jacket?" Buffy looked up again this time keeping her eyes on Willow 
while she waited for an answer.

"Yes, I remember. That was the first time that I'd seen him.  
Xander was very put off by how handsome he was." Willow smiled 
remembering how young and innocent they were.

"Well, when I saw Angel the voice encouraged me. It told me that I 
needed a strong man. It told me how attracted I was to him. I 
thought it was just myself telling me that, but now I don't' think 
so. When I found out about Angel being a vampire, the voice 
encouraged me to forgive and understand him. There were other times 
when I thought about it being not a good idea to be dating a vampire 
when the voice would convince me otherwise. But the voice wasn't 
pushing me towards Angel specifically, it was just telling me that I 
needed a man in my life and Angel was the strongest."

Buffy sipped her coffee, looked at Willows friendly face then looked 
at the ceiling that faded into nothingness. Returning her gaze to 
her coffee she continued.

"The first time it was negative was the time we went to the zoo and 
Xander became hyena boy. We were walking next to each other and you 
had one of your incredible smiles on your face. You just looked so 
adorable that I thought how nice it would be to kiss you. The voice 
said I was disgusting and I felt a little queasy. There were other 
times over the years. The first bad one was when I was all worried 
about you over Moloch, jealous actually." Buffy hung her head a 
little more than looked up at Willow to see the gentle friendly face 
hadn't changed. Encouraged, Buffy looked back at her coffee and 
picked up where she left off.

"There were actually numerous times when I would get the gentle 
reminders, but the next big one was the Halloween where I got you to 
dress up all sexy." Buffy's face paled as the voice dug at her for 
the memory of her friends deliciously sexy body.

Willow saw the look on Buffy's face. "Buffy, it's OK. Just breath 
and relax. Big breathe. You know it's not you now. And we'll get 
to what it really is very soon if you can just keep going."  

Buffy followed Willow's instructions, taking several minutes before 
her face was fully relaxed once more.

"Thanks Will. Anyway, it's been happening over the years. All this 
time I just thought that I was psychologically damaged. I even 
though I was homophobic. But I discovered that wasn't the case the 
day you told me about Tara. I felt like all the air had left my 
body when you told me. I felt this incredible sense of loss and 
then the voice told me it was OK. That it was good that you had a 
girl friend and how I wouldn't be tempted by you anymore. I 
realized then that while I had a personal problem with becoming 
intimate with a woman even though I thought about it a lot, I didn't 
have a problem with you being gay. In fact I remember feeling happy 
but the happy was all overwhelmed with the feeling of loss and the 
confusion about myself. That's the real reason I behaved so 
strangely that day. I had all those thoughts and feelings whizzing 
around in my head play bumper cars."

"I am so glad you told me Buffy. I can't tell you how good knowing 
that makes me feel." Willow spoke softly and still smiling.

"There were a few other bad times and if you think about it, you'll 
probably figure them out for yourself. The voice did continue 
encouraging me towards men. Like Parker and Riley. After Oz left, 
and you and I were spending lots of time together, the voice was 
quietly nudging me all the time and every time I just wished you 
would say forget Riley, that you were there for me the voice would 
go all negative. So I followed the path of least resistance, 
thinking that I needed a man in my like. So Will, am I crazy or did 
someone mess with my head?" Buffy pleaded softly once again looking 
into the emerald eyes of her best friend.

"Oh I am positive that someone has messed with your mind, 
emphatically so." Willow nodded.

'Now we need to figure out who and when. Then that should lead us 
to how and why. Once we have those I'm pretty certain we can evict 
the little squatter." Willow now gave Buffy's hand an encouraging 
squeeze.

"Well when is before Angel at the bronze but probably after the 
harvest." Buffy said thoughtfully.

"Why after the harvest?" Willow asked wondering how Buffy had 
narrowed it down so tightly.

"Well before coming to Sunnydale, I had thoughts about other girls 
before without any voice telling me it was wrong. Then the first 
time I met you when I asked you to help me get caught up, I had a 
few thoughts of how nice it would be studying with you up in my 
bedroom." Buffy's voice got really shy and quiet at the end.  
Looking up and seeing Willow's friendly smile spread into something 
even more wonderful she felt no apprehension about telling the 
rest. Keeping her eyes on Willow's face this time.

"After the harvest, you were a little sweaty and you still smelled 
so good and I got this thought of showering with you, running my 
soapy hands over your body and DAMNIT, SHUTUP YOU ASSHOLE!" Buffy 
screamed putting her hands to her throbbing head as the voice began 
to strongly castigate her.

Willow reigned in her impulse to pull Buffy into a comforting hug.  
She gripped the edge of the table tightly as she watched Buffy 
slowly get herself back under control.

"I can't believe that asshole was me for all those years." Buffy 
finished by taking a deep breath.

"It was probably part of the original suggestion to not think about 
the origin of the voice. But now that you've recognized it, the 
wall is ready to come down. And I know how to do it." Willow said 
confidently.

"The sooner the better." Buffy told her with pleading eyes.

"OK, remember what happened after Glory grabbed Dawn? How I entered 
your mind that was looping around?" Willow asked her.

"Yea, not one of my finer moments." Buffy hung her head.

"Buffy, your reactions was OK. You suffer a great loss and go 
catatonic. I on the other hand turn into a murderous bitch and try 
to end the world. Of the two, yours was the by far the better." 
Willow did squeeze Buffy's hand this time.

Buffy smiled back at her and then frowned. "Uh Will, didn't that 
require magic?"

"Yes and no. What makes me so strong with magic are my natural 
abilities. Abilities I have that do not require magic but enable me 
to tune into magic more easily. Basically, over the years I have 
enhanced my psychic abilities to enhance my use of magic. I've 
avoided moving things with my mind even though it doesn't required 
magic because it kinda opens my senses to the flow of magic around 
me. But I can do it without tapping into magic. That's what I'm 
going to do. I'm going to guide you back to that time between the 
harvest and Dr. Gregory getting killed." Willow was so confident and 
upbeat, just like she used to be in high school. The view of her 
best friends bubbling expression, reminding her how she always stood 
with her no matter what gave her goose bumps of joy.

"I trust you." Buffy told her with complete honesty.

Hearing those words Willow couldn't hold the emotions down. Tears 
of joy just sprang from her eyes. "I won't let you down Buffy. I 
love you."

"I love ." Buffy was stopped as Willow's fingertips covered her lips.

"Could you hold that those words and wait until this is all over.  
Then I would very much like to hear what you really feel. Can you 
do that for me?" The sincerity in Willow's face made Buffy withhold 
all her questions.

"I can wait 'till after our trip down memory lane." Buffy smiled 
reassuringly.

"Thank you Buffy. Let's move over to the bed and make sure we are 
comfortable 'cause this may take awhile." Willow who hadn't let go 
of Buffy's hand, slid her fingers to interlock with the strong 
supple fingers of her best friend and led her towards what she hoped 
would be their destiny.

"I want you to lay on your side facing towards the middle of the bed 
with your knees drawn up." Willow said as she took up her matching 
position.

Buffy took her position and made herself comfortable.

"Now close your eyes and listen to my voice. Take a deep breath and 
hold, hold hold hold release slowly slowly you're almost done you're 
done. Hold hold hold hold now slowly inhale on four three two one 
and hold hold hold hold and release four three two one hold hold 
hold hold inhale four three two one ......

They were just walking out of the bronze after defeating the 
Master's vessel. They were all feeling the excitement and relief of 
post victory. The relief of being alive without fully confronting 
that they could have died. Something that teenagers did innately.  
Buffy looked around her friends and smiled. She couldn't believe 
that she wasn't alone. She had friends who helped her. Her fear of 
them getting hurt she reconciled as a motivator to fight harder to 
make sure it didn't happen. She didn't want to let go of this 
feeling. The feeling that she wasn't alone. Glancing over at the 
giddy red head next to her as they walked towards Giles dilapidated 
car she noticed the sweat beading on her forehead. Sliding down the 
side of her face along her neck. Thoughts of running her tongue 
along her slender neck and lapping up the salty sweetness made her 
heart race. Throwing an arm around her new friend she whispered "I 
can't thank you enough." Willow responded "Not necessary, we're 
closer than needing thank you's." Willow's smile completely 
disarmed her. All she could do was give her a hug before climbing 
into the back seat with her for the ride home.

Giles had dropped everyone off at home except Buffy. "Buffy, I'm 
very proud of how well you did tonight. Also the chairman of the 
council would like to meet with you as soon as possible. It will 
only take a few minutes. Would you mind stopping at my home to meet 
him?" Giles voice was calm, almost emotionless.

"No problem, better to sneak back into my room after mom's asleep 
anyway." Buffy still felt euphoric over the evenings 
accomplishments.

Giles pulled into his drive. This was Buffy's first visit to 
Giles's house. They passed through a court yard and Giles unlocked 
a massive wood door. Sitting in a large arm chair was a balding, 
roundish man with an insincere smile who stood up as the entered.

"Ah miss Summers. It is a true pleasure to meet you. I trust 
everything went well tonight." His smile was so phony Buffy nearly 
frowned. She became instantly suspicious.  

"Buffy, this is Quentin Travers. He would like a few words alone 
with you. I'll be up in my room. Just call when you're ready to 
go." Giles then left and walked up the stairs.

Quentin watched him depart and when he heard the door close he 
turned his greasy smile to the young woman in front of him.

"Merrick told you that we discovered you late." This was not a 
question so Buffy waited for the next words out of his mouth.

"And all the reports we have received continue to describe how 
without early training you achieve success beyond our 
expectations." Thinking his complement would disarm the young girl 
he barely disguised his shock at her reply.

"So you expected me to be dead by now." Buffy statement was 
inarguable.

The oily man smiled like an octopus. "Well, you are blunt. Then 
let me be blunt. We hadn't expected you to survive very long. But 
you have so impressed us. That's why I have a something special for 
you." With that he held up his hand, palm out. Buffy instinctively 
glanced at the upraised hand where her eyes became enchanted with 
the pulsing blue stone held there.

As Buffy's eyes glazed to an iridescent blue Quentin waited until he 
was certain the impressionable girl was fully under.

"Do you hear me?"

"Yes."

"There is a special place in your mind. The things I tell you will 
reside there from here on out to guide you along your proper path.  
Open the door and invite my voice in to become one with you."

"The way is open." Buffy intoned without emotion.

Quentin proceeded to recite a litany of do's and don'ts about Buffy 
personal relations. Reciting from a carefully memorized script he 
droned on for nearly an hour. His last words were "Treat these 
words as your own. Ingratiate them into your own beliefs. Never 
suspect them of any origin other than your own. When you awake in 
the morning, all you will remember is Mr. Giles dropping you off 
down the street from your home and you sneaking back into your room.
This visit never occurred and if we ever meet in the 
future, you will not remember this visit. Do you understand?"

"I under " The door flew open before Buffy could finish. Willow 
came screaming in, her hand outstretched and a blast of green 
lighting shattered the pulsing crystal in Quentin's palm. With a 
wave of her hand the slimy beast was flung to the floor. Willow 
grasped Buffy by her shoulders and captured her eyes.

"Buffy, do you hear me."

"Yes."

"The door is still open. Enter the door and kick the bastard out.  
You don't want him there. He forced himself upon you. Enter the 
room and kick him out." Willow drove every word in like a nail.

Willow could feel Buffy's internal fight to overcome all the 
programming backed by powerful black magic. Willow lent her all the 
strength she could without magic, relying on Buffy's strength to 
succeed. As Buffy's eye's began to clear to their normal hazel the 
smile on Willow's face grew proportionately until Buffy's eye's 
focused and saw her friend.

"Willow, you saved me." Buffy's arms went around her friend and drew 
her in tight.

"Time to go home my love." Willow whispered and opened her eyes to 
see Buffy slowly open hers where they lied side by side on Buffy's 
bed in the strange room Anya had exiled them to.

"Hi." Willow said softly.

"Hi." Buffy smiled.

"Welcome back. How do you feel?" Willow reached out and grasped 
Buffy's hand.

"Good. I feel good. Do you really think it's gone?" Buffy said 
hopefully.

"Only one good way to find out." Willow leaned forward and pressed 
her soft lips to those of her best friend and the woman she had been 
deeply in love with for six years. The kiss started softly, with 
gentle pressure slowly turning into slow delicate suckling of lips.  
Buffy let go a moan of ultimate release truly signaling the demise 
of the terrible voice. She responded slowly and as she felt no 
adverse thoughts, pressed on more passionately. The kiss swiftly 
progressed to the passionate dueling of tongues. Sliding hands over 
lots of bare skin increased the heat between the two impassioned 
friends, expressing long over due passion. Buffy slid her hand 
under Willow's top causing the red head to moan deeply as Buffy's 
fingers stroked her nipple.  

The few clothes they had on were quickly removed and lips, tongues 
and probing fingers sought to pleasure each other.

Buffy could no longer contain herself. Years of forced repression 
of her love for her best friend rode on waves of her passion. "Oh 
Willow, I love you so much. I've been in love with you since the 
first time we met."

Swirling darkness encompassed the oblivious new lovers as the 
transition began.

*****************************************

"Anya, what the hell have you done?" Xander exclaimed as Willow 
disappeared from before their eyes.

"Just what Willow asked for. Nothing more and nothing less except 
for a few enhancements of my own invention." Anya replied with a 
jutting jaw.

"Oh my God, Willow said until Buffy admits she's in love with 
Willow. They'll never be back." Dawn almost whined then caught 
herself, remembering how dark Willow had used that against her.

"Oh don't be silly. They're already back." Anya declared with a 
casual wave of her arm.

"But they just left? And if they are back, where are they?" Dawn 
asked in what she hoped was merely a concerned voice and not a whine.

"Anya what" Xander didn't finish as the finger of his former fiancé 
and current vengeance demon pointed at him.

"The place I sent them exists out of time. So no matter how long it 
took them, no time passed for us. They are in Buffy's bedroom and 
hopefully will still be there when you arrive. They just might be a 
little older is all." Anya said with a wicked smirk on her face.

Dawn beat Xander out the door as he stopped for his keys. In five 
minutes they were dashing through the front door of the Summer's 
house with Dawn in the lead. Taking the stairs two at a time Dawn 
burst into her sister's room "Buffy!" And froze at the site in 
front of her. Her straight sister and her best friend were naked on 
Buffy's bed and Buffy's face was buried between Willow's legs and 
Willow was screaming Buffy's name. This took her all of two seconds 
to absorb and realize Xander was about to reach the bedroom also.  
Grabbing the doorknob, she pulled the door closed and held up her 
hand as Xander's chest ran right into it.

"You can't go in there." Dawn spoke forcefully with just a quiver 
in her voice.

"What do you mean, I have to see that they are all right." Xander 
tried to push past her but Dawn threw herself in front of the door.

"Xander, they are fine. They are just sorta indisposed right now.' 
Dawn tried to keep her voice calm to dissuade his protective 
impulses.

"Oh Buffy. That's the spot. Oh goddess, I'm coming." Was clearly 
heard causing Dawn to turn crimson and Xander's jaw to drop to his 
chest.

"Xander, if you go in there, they'll kill you." Dawn delivered the 
obvious while trying to avoid bursting into nervous giggles.

"I know, but it might just be worth it." Xander smirked, his true 
nature never far away.

"Oh Willow, that feels incredible. Please don't' stop, don't ever 
stop." Buffy's voice loudly proclaimed for young and old to hear.

As Xander leaned forward, Dawn pushed him towards the stairs. "Go 
home and take a shower Xander, a very cold one. I'll call you when 
you can come over. I'm pretty sure they're going to be in there for 
awhile. A long while." Dawn gave Xander a final shove towards the 
stairs and as he slowly left, she turned and looked at the door. A 
knowing smile slowly suffused her young face as she fully 
acknowledged what had just occurred.

"You're finally happy Buffy. And I am so happy for you." Dawn 
turned to leave the long over due lovers make up for years of stolen 
time.