FIC: Learning to live pt 11

["jend1205" <jend2002@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

Hey I didn't even have to lock anyone up.

Author: Jen D
Disclaimer: I don't own just like it.
Rating: G-R and all points between mostly language and violence
Pairing: Willow/other - Willow/ Buffy eventually
Spoilers: Season 6 maybe others somewhere down the road
Summery: Giles brings someone in to help after everything happens in 
season 6. Sorry I suck at this part.
Author notes: I have never written anything before this, so please 
tell me what you think


Sara sat at the bar in the kitchen watching the kids in the pool. 
Buffy and Xander were trying to dunk each other and Anya was lying in 
one of the floating chair catching some sun. Willow was sitting on 
the side with just her feet in the water. She was wearing one of Jen 
bikinis. She had remember not being very happy at her choice of 
bathing suits but now seeing it on Willow she thanked whatever god 
was listening. She watched Xander look at Buffy and saw a silent 
commucation. Buffy and Xander snuck up on Anya and flipped the chair 
over. Anya came up and sputtered a string of cuss words that made 
Sara blush. Sara had thought she had heard every cuss combinations 
there was working work with all construction guys at her clubs over 
the years. She was wrong. She was so busy laughing and watching the 
trio that she didn't even notice Willow get up and head for the
door.
Willow walked in to the kitchen and saw Sara watching out the 
window. She had a big grin and was blushing. Sara seemed peaceful 
sitting there. The mid day sun was shining through the window and 
Sara looked so much younger then 34. She didn't look a day over
22. 
Willow wonder if that was one of the good things about being a 
slayer. Slowed the aging process down, she made a mental note to ask 
Giles about it. 
Sara felt someone watching her and turned to see Willow looking at 
her. Willow blushed and stammered out, " Um h-hey Sara, I got hot
and 
needed something to drink". Sara looked at Willow standing there
and 
hoped that the want she was feeling was not reflected on her face.
"I think there is Coke in the fridge and tea"; Sara answered
and 
looked back out the window.
Willow opened the fridge and grabbed a coke and looked at Sara 
again, "What are you thinking about".
"I ahh, was just thinking how nice it is to be home again, and to 
have people around. For a long time it has just been Gail, Jen and I. 
I guess I just forgot how nice it was to have friends again".
"We are", Willow said.
"We are what", Sara asked looking lost.
"Friends and steadily working your way to family".
Sara smiled the biggest smile she thought she had smiled since Josie 
had 
told her about Jen, "Thanks Willow, I would be proud to be able
to 
call you family. We don't have any of our own."
"Did the girls and Giles take off for the mall"?
"Yup and I honestly think Giles prayed before he got in to the
car", 
Sara laughed.
Willow had to giggle at the sight of Giles kneeling beside the car 
praying, "Is she that bad?"
"No not really, she is pretty good really", Sara answered,
"So 
Willow, why we go to my office and talk for a little bit. Gail will 
be here in a couple hours, so we might as well use the time to our 
advantage."
"Lead the way, Dr. Stevens.
Sara laughed and thought about how she had used her title it this 
morning on the phone, "Yeah well sometimes it does come in
handy". 
Willow and Sara headed for the office. Willow looked at some of the 
books that were on the shelf in the library side of Sara 
office, "Wow, Giles would kill for some of these books, Doc."
"I know he has tried to talk me out of them many times. Most of
them 
were Sam's. Some of them are books I picked up in England when I 
lived there. The magic books are from Josie's grandmas. Would you 
like me to lock those up?"
"I don't think so. I'll make you a deal if I feel like
they are 
tempting me I will tell you" Willow answered and sat down on the 
couch.
"Tell me about your family, Willow"
"There isn't much to tell. They aren't really a part of
my life and 
haven't been since I was 12. They usually come home long enough
to 
pack clean clothes and leave the dirty ones. The only time my mom 
paid much attention was when she tried to burn me at the stake".
"I have read about that from one of Giles updates to the
council", 
Sara said. Willow was shocked that Sara knew about that.
" Willow you know that I do still work for the council, right? I
don`t 
like them but I can help here and there and that means a lot to
me", 
Sara asked seeing the surprise in Willow face.
"I understand it just wigged me out to know you know so much
about us 
and we know so little about you", Willow answered. 
" Willow you made me a deal earlier and I will make you one. If
there 
is anything any of you want to know just ask, ok.
"Ok, Doc, I am sure we will, we have learned the hard way,
secrets 
aren't a good thing".
` Well maybe not all of you', Sara thought thinking about her
conversation with Buffy this morning, " so do you feel like your 
parents
have 
left you to yourself too much".
"Hell yes, they were never there when I needed them. Do you know
how 
many times I have been to the hospital in the last 6 years? More then 
I could count. Were they there no, did they even ask when they would 
see the bruises, no? They weren't parents to me, never were",
Willow 
had a hard time controlling her anger toward her real family.
For the next hour Willow talked about her childhood and her parents. 
She talked about Buffy's mom, Joyce, and how she had taken care
of 
her, and the rest of them. She told Sara that Joyce's death was 
harder on her than she thought her own mom's death would have
been. 
She talked about how hard it had been when Giles had gone back to 
England when Buffy had died. How he had yelled at her for the dark 
magic that had brought Buffy back. Willow cried and talked. Sara just 
let her babble on and on, knowing that Willow needed to let the anger 
out. Willow finally stopped crying and smiled, " I'm sorry, I
didn't 
mean to go on for so long".
"Hey that's what we are here for remember. Willow, Tara death
wasn't 
the beginning of things. I think it started a long time ago. It might 
have come to a head right than. You lost the one person who never 
asked you to be anything but what you were. She didn't ask you to
be 
a witch, or the best friend or the good daughter. She just asked you 
to be you but it didn't start there. I have a couple questions
for 
you now though. Have you ever heard voices in your head"?
"No, no voices", Willow answered.
"Good, have you ever noticed mood swings, that you can't
control? Do 
you remember before Tara death going from being happy to sad and back 
to being happy for no reason?"
Willow thought back through her life and realized that she had always 
felt that way, "umm yes, I have".
"I kind of thought so, I can't be sure Willow, without a few
test but 
it is entirely possible you suffer from manic depressive disorder. 
That would explain a lot. Most people who suffer from it have a 
tendency to self medicate themselves. Most do it with alcohol or 
drugs but in your case it, you may have used magic instead".
Willow wasn't sure if she was happy that maybe it was not
entirely 
her fault or scared at the thought that she was mentally ill, "
so
what 
now, Doc?"
"I would like to run some test and there is a questionnaire I
what to 
give you to fill out. After that we can go from there", Sara told
the 
apprehensive red head.
"Sara, will I ever be able to do magic again"?
"I don't know maybe, if we can control things. I can't
give you any 
guarantees but maybe you can learn the basic again. We'll
see."
"Mom we're home", Sara heard Jen yell from the foyer,
" well I think 
we learned a lot today why don't we call it a day and go see what
the 
kids bought. Knowing Jen she bought the place out".

Dawn saw Willow and Sara come out of the office, she noticed that 
Willow eyes were red from crying but she also saw a look of peace 
too. She said a silent thank you to the powers to be for sending them 
the dark haired ex-slayer
"So did you leave anything left at the mall and where is
Giles?" Sara 
asked her daughter looking at all the bags in the foyer.
"Whatever, if we are going to stay here I had to have some cooler 
clothes", Jen said looking at her mom, " He said to tell you
he took 
the car and had to check the Magic Box, you know Uncle Giles was 
right you are old".
Dawn and Jen started to laugh and seeing the look on Sara face at 
being called old, Willow couldn't help but chuckle too.
"You know I could talk Buffy in to changing her mind about
letting 
you go tonight".
"You wouldn`t dare", Jen said and stuck her tongue out at
her mom.
"Why you little", Sara started and then chased her daughter
to the 
kitchen. Dawn and Willow just shrugged at each other and followed. 
When they got to the kitchen Jen was on one side of the center island 
and Sara was on the other side. They chased each other round until 
Jen made a break for the door. Sara caught up to her at the pool and 
shoved her in.
Buffy noticed Dawn look of mischief, " Dawn", she yelled but
she was 
too late. Dawn walked over and pushed Sara in. Sara looked at the 
teen and laughed. 
" Thata teach you to be mean to my friends", Dawn said. 
"Ok kid, you got me, now help me out", Sara said. Dawn held
out her 
hand, Sara grabbed it and pulled Dawn in to the pool.
"Dawn I can't believe you fell for that one", Buffy
laughed at her 
wet, pouting sister.
"Oh shut up, Buffy", Dawn said splashing at Buffy. The group
of new 
friend splashed and played in the pool until Gail and Giles came home 
and everyone got out to get ready to go get their stuff from home. 
They made plans to meet back at 7pm. Sara said she would have the 
grill lit and they would cookout before going out. They all agreed 
that it sounded good and went inside to go. Sara sat beside the pool 
for another minute before she got up to take a shower and get ready 
herself. ` What a day' she thought, `And it's not
even over yet'.