FIC: Learning to live pt 27b

["jend1205" <jend2002@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

Author: Jen D
Disclaimer: I don't own just like it.
Rating: G-R and all points between mostly language and violence
Pairing: Willow/other/ Buffy eventually
Spoilers: Season 6 maybe others somewhere down the road
Summery: Giles brings someone in to help after everything happens in 
season 6. Sorry I suck at this part.
Author notes: I have never written anything before this, so please 
tell me what you think

While Gail and Buffy had the guy in the other office, Sara looked at 
the numbers on the paper and tried to concentrate on them. She 
sighed, gave up trying and went to the couch to lie down. She pulled 
the blanket around her and fell asleep.  
"Sara wake up, baby", the red head said.
"Josie"?
"Yes baby its me", Josie replied and laid her hand on
Sara's shoulder.
"No you're dead, fifteen years ago. This must be one hell of
a dream."
"Yes I am dead but this is no dream. I have been watching over
you 
for a long time. I am so proud of the things you have done. Jen is 
growing into a beautiful woman. Sara I need to tell you about some 
stuff I should have told you from the beginning. Baby, you have to 
talk to someone, you can't keep your being raped to yourself. You
are 
going to lose the best thing to happen to you since well me".
"You know about Buffy and Willow then", Sara asked afraid of
her 
response.
" I know everything and I am very happy for you. They are
wonderful 
people and you are very lucky to have them but if you don't tell
them 
you are going to lose them. Sara do you remember the night we met, I 
was crying in the park. I never told you why and I should have. My 
mom got remarried when I was 10. He was a real asshole, I never liked 
him. One night when I was 14, he came into my room drunk and raped 
me. I was so humiliated that I didn't tell mom, I felt so dirty.
I 
kept it to myself for three months until I finally lost it and tried 
to kill myself. I just wanted the pain to stop but it didn't
work, 
neither will shutting yourself down. That night in the hospital I 
found out I was pregnant and it was too late to do anything about it. 
I told my mom what had happened and we left, we didn't even pack
any 
clothes just left. I had the baby and put her up for adoption. That 
was why I was a year behind in school. After the baby was born I went 
back to school. One day I came home and found the front door opened, 
I found my mom in the kitchen, and she was dead. My stepfather had 
killed her and then shot himself in the head. I came to live with 
grams after that and met you".
"Oh god Josie why didn't you tell me"?
"You had so much going on in your life back then that I
didn't want 
to burden you with it".
"It wouldn't have mattered to me. I would have been there for
you. 
You should`ve told me".
"Just like you ought to tell them. So why aren't you taking
your own 
advice, then. They will be there for you like you would have been 
there for me".
"I guess you're right if I look at it that way. With the
babies and 
all I just thought they shouldn't have any more stress then they 
already had".
"But not telling them has been worse on them. Sara they love you
and 
would do anything in the world for you. I can see it in there eyes 
whenever they look at you. Baby, you have to be strong and take care 
of my daughters. I am counting on you."
"Daughters", Sara asked confused.
"Yes my daughters. I have two and they are both living in your
house".
"Willow", Sara whispered, " she is the baby you gave up
for adoption".
"Yes she is, so you see it is very important to me for you to be 
there for her and Jen. These are my grandchildren they are carrying.  
You have to be at your best for the Sonce guy. My kids and grandkids 
need a world to grow up in".
"Jesus Josie, are you sure this isn't a dream". Josie
pinched Sara's 
arm.
"Ow damn girl".
"I had to make you believe me somehow and pain always worked
before", 
Josie smirked thinking about how Sara had liked her pain.
"So do you know anything about Sonce and when he plans on coming 
here, Jos".
" No the powers to be only let me come back to try and help you.
They 
know that there isn't a chance in hell if you aren't
well".
"Josie I felt so helpless that night."
"I know sweetheart. You have them, let them help you heal. I have
to 
go now but know that I am always watching you. I love you. Tell 
Jennifer that I miss her and love her. Tell her how proud of her I 
am".
"Do you have to go"?
"Yes, you have a life to live. Good bye Sara". Sara woke up
and tried 
to clear her head, `Willow is Josie daughter'. There was a
knock at 
the door and Giles walked in. 
"Giles", Sara cried and fell into his arms and told him about
being 
raped, Josie and Willow.
"Sara let it out we will help you and it will be all right"
Sara 
cried as Giles held her and rocked her back and forth. She could feel 
the walls crumbling down.
"Rupert they are going to hate me", Sara said thinking about
her 
girlfriends, `If that is what I can call them still. I
haven't been a 
very good one lately.
"Sara I don't think you have anything to worry about. They
have been 
worried sick about you. It has been all I could do to keep Buffy from 
tying you up until you talked to them."
"Maybe you should have let her".
"I will keep that in mind for the next time you decide to shut us
out"
"Won't be a next time I promise", Sara told him. Sara
grabbed her 
guitar from the corner and headed for the door, "Old man I have
to go 
win back my girlfriends". Giles smiled and wondered if things
would 
be okay for a while, `for them I hope so'.



Sara walked into the club and went to the stage. She motioned for 
the DJ to cut the music and to turn on the stage microphone. She sat 
down on a stool, "Hey Guys, sorry for the interruption but I have 
some things to say to some people. I have been a real bitch lately to 
my friends and family. I just want to tell them how much I love them 
and I promise as soon as this song is over we will leave and I will 
tell you all about it. First though I want to sing you this song. 
Sara began to play the guitar and sing?
 
I remember you do you remember me too 
Born on the 14th of July
Smell of roses made her cry
Though your going far from home
Rest assured your not alone
Cause I would give everything I own
I would give my heart and the skin and these bones
The sun, the moon the earth the sky
I never even stop to wonder why
I would do anything
I would give everything
To be your everything

Sara saw Buffy put her arm around Willow and wipe the tears from her 
eyes. Gail was holding Jen and Giles had Dawn. Xander and Anya held 
hands and were looking into each others eyes.

Seems like such a long long time
Since your body crossed my mind but I think that you 
should know
Wasn't I who had to go
Cause I would give everything that I own
I give you my love and this heart made of stone
The sun, the moon, the earth, the sky
The motorcycle I like to ride
I would do anything
I would give everything 
To be your everything

But if ever you should stray
Just sing along and I will play

I remember you
Do you remember me too
Seems like such a long long time
Since I held you near and called you mine
Cause I would give everything I own
I would give you my heart the skin and these bones
The sun the moon the earth and the sky
A brand new car that you and I could drive
I would do anything
I would give everything
To be your everything


Sara finished up the song, walked off stage to her girlfriends and 
pulled them into a hug, "Lets go home".