FF: Stuck In Overdrive (3/9)

["Jamie" <jamie@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

TITLE: Stuck In Overdrive (3/9)
AUTHOR: Jamie (jamie@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx)
DISCLAIMER: All characters belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. I don't
own anything.
SUMMARY: A few months on from the events of 'Stuck In The Feedback Loop', Willow grieves Buffy's death. Xander has turned to other methods to cope, and Giles is at a loss as to what to do. The arrival of Billy, a boy who's comatose state allows for nightmares to become reality complicates matters further.
SPOILERS: Unless you haven't seen season one...
DISTRIBUTION: E-mail me.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: And here's chapter 3 kids. This took fuckin ages to write,I went through about two re-writes and it's still not perfect, but I'm more or less happy with it. Sloppy I know, but hey, I wanted to get it out tonight, because I won't be able to continure with it until Sunday after the next hour. Yeah, anyway, enjoy. I just wanted to say thanks to all the people who've e-mailed me with feedback about this story. Especially Dan, Red Willow, Panda Mel and Alex. And sorry if I missed some people out, you guys'll be on the next chapter...seriously though, it means a lot. Thanks.









CHAPTER 3
The Despair Factor








Giles leaned back in his chair, letting the warmth of the room and the aroma of his tea invade his environment and taint it. He sat in the same suit he'd been wearing when Willow had come to see him earlier, only now far crinklier. Jenny sat opposite him on his sofa. In between them there was a coffee table, on which rested the ornately carved wooden box. The Watcher didn't fail to notice that as Jenny was talking to him, she rarely, if ever, took her eyes off it.

"Did you do as I said?" She asked quietly after a few moments of silence. Her eyes were still fixed upon the wooden vessel. Rupert studied her curiously, cocking his head as a dog would. He reached forward and picked up the box, sitting back down in his chair a few moments later. He flipped the catch absent-mindedly and lifted the lid. The dagger was still inside, wrapped in its linen shroud. Giles began to run his fingers over the covering.

"Yes." he murmured, absorbed in the weapon. He thought about its history and of its significance. It had been passed down from generations of Watchersin his family, its origins lost in the sands of time. Always it had servedthe Slayer well, never had it once been broken or lost. With all such things however, there were rumours. Rumours that the weapon contained.some sortof power over its bearer, a grip of immense power. Giles was torn between two decisions. The first, and the one he would have preferred to follow through, would be to study it first, to research it. If there was any truth inthis rumour he wanted to know. He didn't know if he could live with himself if Willow was hurt through his gift. The second decision he could make would be to give it to Jenny Calendar tonight. She said she needed a personalitem from him, and item that had touched the blood of his Slayer. She promised him it would help her find a way to give Willow some sort of peace. Atthe time she had been so convincing, and he had trusted her. But now he wasn't so sure. The way she stared intently at the box, as if in anticipationwas.unnerving.to say the least.

"Excellent." She said, standing up and smoothing her skirt free of wrinkles. "If you lend me the dagger for tonight then, I'll see what I can do." Shemoved forward towards him, expecting the man to hand the box to him. But instead Giles held out his hand.

"Sit down, we need to talk." He said in a low voice. This time it was Jennywho cocked her head, surprised at this turn of events. Still, she continued to stand.

"Time is running out Rupert, I need that box now." She pressed, taking a step forward. She could see the clash of emotions on his face. She knew that with a little gentle persuasion.

"Sit down." He said again, looking at her eye to eye this time. Still she refused to move.

"Why are you acting like this all of a sudden?" She asked, knotting her eyebrows in thought. "I thought we went through this earlier."

"We didn't Jenny and you know that." He said calmly. "Now sit down!" This time the woman did sit, perturbed and angry at the commanding tone he had used. Apparently satisfied, Giles closed the lid and locked it. He put the vessel on the floor next to his feet and leaned forward. In a gentler tone this time, he continued. "I want to know, exactly, what you plan on doing with Willow's blood. I want every single detail, no matter how inconsequentialyou think it may be, and I."

"Rupert," Jenny began, cutting him off. "Why can't you tru-"

"EVERY detail!" The older man said, raising his voice. His face flushed redslightly and he took a deep breath before he continued. "Blood magick is one of the oldest, and most powerful forms of the art. I assume you're planning a spell or a ritual, and I want to know. Or else, you're not leaving this house with anything but a broken trust and agreement."

Jenny's face flushed darkly, and inside Rupert was taken aback, although hedid not show it on his expression, or change his posture. For the first time, he didn't feel safe with this woman.

"Alright." She said after a long pause. "You want to know the whole story. I suppose that's fair enough. The spell is a hybrid form of an old spell that has been practised in secret by Watchers and Slayers for centuries. It is so taboo that even the diaries make no mention of it, for fear of reprisal from the Council. It involves two parts. One is an item of personal importance from the Watcher, to provide a link between him and his Slayer. The item is then put into contact with that Slayer's blood. Both Watcher and Slayer now have a psychic link to that object, which acts something like a meeting ground. The pair's consciousness' meet inside the object, in a mentally created landscape. There, the Slayer confronts her innermost fears, she reveals her deepest, darkest desires, and she reveals secrets she may have kept all her life to her Watcher. The Watcher then does the same in return. Initially, when the spell was first created centuries ago, it was used as abonding exercise for the Slayer and her Watcher. However it has only been used a few times, because of the highly personal nature of this procedure. I've modified the spell slightly to suit our needs. After the initial purpose of the spell, Willow will confront her problem, personified in her mind.In short, she will confront Buffy. From there, hopefully she will be able to move on and perhaps begin dealing with her loss, rather than running from it."

A long silence spanned minutes between the two. Giles was locked in thought, secretly horrified. Jenny watched him intently, watched his every reaction with great intensity. The older man felt as if he could feel her gaze penetrating his soul. He broke eye contact with her and immediately the feeling stopped. Shaken, he lifted his now-cold tea to his mouth, but drank anyway.

"That spell." He said eventually, looking into his tea, "Is." Jenny leaned forward, hanging on the words. ".an invasion of privacy of the highest order. It is an invasion of Willow's mind and a blatant desecration of her rights as an individual." Jenny fell back into her seat, mouth agape. She couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"To do this anyway would be wrong. If Willow decides she wanted to tell me such things as you have described, she would tell me herself. It would not be needed to go into each other's minds and force it out. But to go throughwith this procedure when she does not even KNOW about it." Giles trailed off again and shook his head. He looked up this time, his ice blue eyes locking with Jenny's dark, chocolate ones. "That is rape."

Again, Jenny's face darkened. She stood up for the second time and advancedforward.

"You are unwilling to do what must be done," she said icily and bitterly. "You don't have the strength to go through with it. You only think of her asyour Slayer, don't you. Look at yourself right now for God's sake! You're not behaving like a Watcher would, not even a caring friend! If you were truly concerned about her, you'd do it, even though it might mean breaking the trust between you two. You'd do it because the girl needs help! And you dare call yourself a Watcher!"

Giles was silent again, and when he spoke it was with the same calm voice he had used before.

"No, I'm not her Watcher." Jenny smiled smugly, believing she had finally won him over with his admittance. Again he locked eyes with her, boring through hers with his gaze, and making sure his words reached her not only in content but emotion. "I'm her family."

She inhaled sharply and pursed her lips, which went white under the pressure. Anger flashed across her face. She stormed to the door and grabbed her jacket.

"If this leads to Willow getting hurt, or worse." Jenny fixed his gaze. "Itwill be your fault. Her blood will be on your hands, Watcher." She left, slamming the door behind her.

Rupert picked up the box next to his chair and put it back in his weapons cabinet. He secured the main lock, then fixed the padlock in its place. Normally he didn't bother, but he felt that extra security was needed tonight. At least until tomorrow afternoon. He walked over to the decanter on the table opposite the cabinet and poured himself a small glass of dark, amber liquid. He looked at it and sighed for a second before taking it into his mouth and swallowing it in one gulp, then slammed the glass down onto the table. He poured himself another, but just as he was about to take it into his mouth he dropped the glass and cried out in surprise. The glass fell to thefloor and rolled onto its side, spilling out ten or twelve maggots. 

Giles looked at the floor for a few seconds before walking briskly to the door and putting on his jacket, making sure the car keys were inside it. He looked at the decanter before he left the house, now brimming over with themaggots and he left, shaken.

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Xander inhaled, feeling the burn of the hot, acrid smoke filling his lungs.He exhaled a few seconds later, blowing the smoke out in a lance shape into the night air. He could feel the calming nicotine begin to flow throughout his system, feel it pacifying his anger and nullifying his sadness to an extent. He sniffed and wiped away the blood and tears, not wanting his bestfriend to see him like this. GOD DAMMIT! He thought suddenly, screaming athimself. WHY THE FUCK ARE THINGS SO MESSED UP?

He sighed heavily, exhaling. He realised suddenly that he'd gone through the first cigarette and had lit a second. He mentally shrugged, he'd had trauma. He glanced to his left as Willow sat down next to him, and looked back at his glowing cigarette as she picked up the packet and took one out. The glowing red end attracted Xander's gaze as it burned away, consuming the tobacco beneath it and releasing the smoke into the night sky. At a nudge from Willow he fished into his pockets and brought out his matches, which he gave to the red head. She struck one on the touch-paper and he listened out for the familiar crackle as the first strands of tobacco caught fire. She inhaled the flame into the cigarette and exhaled quickly, sparking drags sucked. She let it hang in the air for a second before taking the first properdrag, feeling the same calming effect begin to work its way into her system ever so slightly. A long period of silence passed between the pair, both dragging on their respective cigarettes and exhaling into the night, Willowwaiting for Xander to speak, and Xander waiting for his mind to clear.

"I'm sorry." he croaked after a while. Willow looked over at him.

"Sorry for what?"

"I'm sorry you had to see that. I'm sorry you saw where I came from. I'm sorry you're involved in.this." He trailed off, his voice breaking on the word 'in'. Willow put her arm around his shoulder and he leaned his head on hers, whispering his apology over and over. Eventually she brought his head up with her finger crooked under her chin. She wiped a drying streak of blood from his face and stroked his cheek with her thumb.

"Shhhhhhhh." she gently whispered, still stroking his cheek. Her black nailvarnish caught the moon and flashed in her eyes, bringing with her a flashof realisation in that moment. That situation, that pose.everything stop for Willow as time ground to a halt with the truth of what she felt. Suddenly time regained its grip on her reality and began to move forward again.

They say the eyes are the window to the soul.

Willow looked into Xander's eyes and held his gaze as she spoke, never breaking contact.

"Xander, you're my best friend in the world. You've been here for me all throughout the hardest time in my life. I couldn't ever hope to know a betterperson than you, I would never ask to know anyone other than you. I love you, and don't let anyone else ever tell you you're anything less than you are. A wonderful person."

She leaned forward a few inches so the tip of their noses touched slightly,ever so slightly. She closed her eyes slowly and brought his head forward with her hand. Their lips brushed gently at first, a small t ouch. Then shetook his unshaven top lip in between hers and deepened the kiss. They stayed for a few seconds before they broke apart and opened their eyes, still looking directly at each others.

Xander opened his mouth to say something, when Billy screamed Willow's name. Her head whipped round to where he was standing by the gate. His arm was outstretched, pointing down the road and his face had blanched. She turned her head around again slowly, knowing what she would see.

The ugly man lumbered into view, the moonlight reflecting off his skin.

"What the f." Xander started, but broke off as Willow grabbed his hand and pulled him up.

"BILLY!" she shouted, and grasped his hand as he joined her side. She released her friend's and ran with them along the street. "Turn left at the nextcorner," she gasped. "We'll lose him at the next junction." Xander looked at her questioningly as they ran. "I'll explain later." 

"You'd better." He said between breaths, and looked at her meaningfully. She didn't miss the double entendre. She broke eye contact and looked over atBilly. He was keeping up remarkably well for a kid his age.

They reached the corner and swerved around it. If Willow's memory served, they should now be on 23rd Street.

Only they weren't on 23rd Street.

The trio skidded to a halt on a linoleum floor. Overhead, a cement ceiling was broken in regular intervals by circular lights. Lockers ringed either side of the hallway, again, broken at regular intervals, although this time by classroom doors.

They were back in school.

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They walked through the hallway, peering through the doors of classrooms they passed by. The school was completely deserted, or at least this wing of it was. Willow tried not to think about how they managed to get to school, enough bizarreness had happened for one day in her life, and this she coulddo without. However, she had an overriding feeling that they were here fora reason.

And she didn't like that feeling.

They passed what felt like the fiftieth classroom, and it was exactly the same as the others. The emptiness wasn't unnerving because it was just empty, it was as if no one had ever been there. The halls were completely devoidof litter, of graffiti and of the other items that you associate with a used school. In the classrooms, all the tables were perfectly lined up and the blackboards were actually black and unmarked by dust.

Not a word was exchanged between the trio as they walked up the corridor. Eventually they became aware of an obstruction ahead and they all looked forwards. About fifteen metres away a door marked the end of the corridor. They stated towards it quickly at first, clearing most of the gap, but slowed down towards the end, eventually stopping about two feet away from it. Willow looked at Xander and Billy, and they both nodded. Just as Willow turned the door handle however, Billy shouted out.

"No.wait!"

But it was too late. The trio stood in the doorway as it swung open lazily,as if bored with the situation. The door fell open all the way onto its hinges and stayed there, affording a wide view into the room.

It was a massacre.

Students lay over desks, over chairs, and over each other. Their throats had been ripped out, they'd been disembowled, they'd been decapitated, they'dbeen hung from the bar light. However, the overwhelming majority of the corpses had massive neck trauma. Vampires.

Billy turned around and vomited. Xander stood in mute shock.

Willow took two slow steps into the room, her eyes flicking around the roomat the scenes of carnage. Blood had been splattered all over the walls andthe windows had been tinted with it, so that the moonlight that filtered in cast an eerie crimson glow over everything.

Willow's eyes were fixed on the whiteboard.

Written in blood, smeared like some cheap paint, were four words.

"You Will All Die."

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Giles pulled up in front of the school. His brain had got past some of the block that was stopping him from making any sense of printed words, but he could only recognise numbers. As a result, he'd been able to drive fairly safely.

He stepped out of his car and pulled his sports bag out. The clacking of wood against plastic and against metal gave away the contents. Giles shut thedoor and locked his car.

He turned and started walking towards the main entrance, then stopped. A figure waited for him on top of the steps, sitting on the wall casually and throwing him a wave. It was a man he hadn't seen in over twenty years, a manhe thought was dead.

His father.




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End Chapter 3.



Jamie
jamie@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
"So go ahead and label me an asshole cuz I can accept responsibility for what I've done, but not for who I am." - NOFX, 'Don't Call Me White'
http://www.buffywillow.com

Glory: Funny. 'Cause I look around at this world you're so eager to be a part of ... and all I see is six billion lunatics looking for the fastest ride out. Who's not crazy? Look around. Everyone's drinking, smoking, shootingup ... shooting each other, or just plain screwing their brains out 'causethey don't want 'em anymore. *I'm* crazy? Honey, I'm the original one-eyedchicklet in the kingdom of the blind. 'Cause at least I admit the world makes me nuts. 

Xander: Yeah, I'm gonna have to go with deadboy on this one. 
Angel: Could you not call me that?