From: "Jamie" <jamie@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Reply-To: buffywantswillow@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To: <buffywantswillow@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Subject: ::BuffyWantsWillow:: FF: Stuck In Overdrive (3/9)
Date: Wed, 23 Oct 2002 22:00:03 +0100
TITLE: Stuck In Overdrive (3/9)
AUTHOR: Jamie (jamie@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx)
DISCLAIMER: All characters belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. I
don't
own anything.
SUMMARY: A few months on from the events of 'Stuck In The Feedback Loop',
Willow grieves Buffy's death. Xander has turned to other methods to cope,
and Giles is at a loss as to what to do. The arrival of Billy, a boy who's
comatose state allows for nightmares to become reality complicates matters
further.
SPOILERS: Unless you haven't seen season one...
DISTRIBUTION: E-mail me.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: And here's chapter 3 kids. This took fuckin ages to write,
I went through about two re-writes and it's still not perfect, but I'm more
or less happy with it. Sloppy I know, but hey, I wanted to get it out
tonight, because I won't be able to continure with it until Sunday after
the next hour. Yeah, anyway, enjoy. I just wanted to say thanks to all the
people who've e-mailed me with feedback about this story. Especially Dan,
Red Willow, Panda Mel and Alex. And sorry if I missed some people out, you
guys'll be on the next chapter...seriously though, it means a lot. Thanks.
CHAPTER 3
The Despair Factor
Giles leaned back in his chair, letting the warmth of the room and the
aroma of his tea invade his environment and taint it. He sat in the same
suit he'd been wearing when Willow had come to see him earlier, only now
far crinklier. Jenny sat opposite him on his sofa. In between them there
was a coffee table, on which rested the ornately carved wooden box. The
Watcher didn't fail to notice that as Jenny was talking to him, she rarely,
if ever, took her eyes off it.
"Did you do as I said?" She asked quietly after a few moments of silence.
Her eyes were still fixed upon the wooden vessel. Rupert studied her
curiously, cocking his head as a dog would. He reached forward and picked
up the box, sitting back down in his chair a few moments later. He flipped
the catch absent-mindedly and lifted the lid. The dagger was still inside,
wrapped in its linen shroud. Giles began to run his fingers over the
covering.
"Yes." he murmured, absorbed in the weapon. He thought about its history
and of its significance. It had been passed down from generations of
Watchers in his family, its origins lost in the sands of time. Always it
had served the Slayer well, never had it once been broken or lost. With all
such things however, there were rumours. Rumours that the weapon
contained.some sort of power over its bearer, a grip of immense power.
Giles was torn between two decisions. The first, and the one he would have
preferred to follow through, would be to study it first, to research it. If
there was any truth in this rumour he wanted to know. He didn't know if he
could live with himself if Willow was hurt through his gift. The second
decision he could make would be to give it to Jenny Calendar tonight. She
said she needed a personal item from him, and item that had touched the
blood of his Slayer. She promised him it would help her find a way to give
Willow some sort of peace. At the time she had been so convincing, and he
had trusted her. But now he wasn't so sure. The way she stared intently at
the box, as if in anticipation was.unnerving.to say the least.
"Excellent." She said, standing up and smoothing her skirt free of
wrinkles. "If you lend me the dagger for tonight then, I'll see what I can
do." She moved forward towards him, expecting the man to hand the box to
him. But instead Giles held out his hand.
"Sit down, we need to talk." He said in a low voice. This time it was Jenny
who cocked her head, surprised at this turn of events. Still, she continued
to stand.
"Time is running out Rupert, I need that box now." She pressed, taking a
step forward. She could see the clash of emotions on his face. She knew
that with a little gentle persuasion.
"Sit down." He said again, looking at her eye to eye this time. Still she
refused to move.
"Why are you acting like this all of a sudden?" She asked, knotting her
eyebrows in thought. "I thought we went through this earlier."
"We didn't Jenny and you know that." He said calmly. "Now sit down!" This
time the woman did sit, perturbed and angry at the commanding tone he had
used. Apparently satisfied, Giles closed the lid and locked it. He put the
vessel on the floor next to his feet and leaned forward. In a gentler tone
this time, he continued. "I want to know, exactly, what you plan on doing
with Willow's blood. I want every single detail, no matter how
inconsequential you think it may be, and I."
"Rupert," Jenny began, cutting him off. "Why can't you tru-"
"EVERY detail!" The older man said, raising his voice. His face flushed red
slightly and he took a deep breath before he continued. "Blood magick is
one of the oldest, and most powerful forms of the art. I assume you're
planning a spell or a ritual, and I want to know. Or else, you're not
leaving this house with anything but a broken trust and agreement."
Jenny's face flushed darkly, and inside Rupert was taken aback, although he
did not show it on his expression, or change his posture. For the first
time, he didn't feel safe with this woman.
"Alright." She said after a long pause. "You want to know the whole story.
I suppose that's fair enough. The spell is a hybrid form of an old spell
that has been practised in secret by Watchers and Slayers for centuries. It
is so taboo that even the diaries make no mention of it, for fear of
reprisal from the Council. It involves two parts. One is an item of
personal importance from the Watcher, to provide a link between him and his
Slayer. The item is then put into contact with that Slayer's blood. Both
Watcher and Slayer now have a psychic link to that object, which acts
something like a meeting ground. The pair's consciousness' meet inside the
object, in a mentally created landscape. There, the Slayer confronts her
innermost fears, she reveals her deepest, darkest desires, and she reveals
secrets she may have kept all her life to her Watcher. The Watcher then
does the same in return. Initially, when the spell was first created
centuries ago, it was used as a bonding exercise for the Slayer and her
Watcher. However it has only been used a few times, because of the highly
personal nature of this procedure. I've modified the spell slightly to suit
our needs. After the initial purpose of the spell, Willow will confront her
problem, personified in her mind. In short, she will confront Buffy. From
there, hopefully she will be able to move on and perhaps begin dealing with
her loss, rather than running from it."
A long silence spanned minutes between the two. Giles was locked in
thought, secretly horrified. Jenny watched him intently, watched his every
reaction with great intensity. The older man felt as if he could feel her
gaze penetrating his soul. He broke eye contact with her and immediately
the feeling stopped. Shaken, he lifted his now-cold tea to his mouth, but
drank anyway.
"That spell." He said eventually, looking into his tea, "Is." Jenny leaned
forward, hanging on the words. ".an invasion of privacy of the highest
order. It is an invasion of Willow's mind and a blatant desecration of her
rights as an individual." Jenny fell back into her seat, mouth agape. She
couldn't believe what she was hearing.
"To do this anyway would be wrong. If Willow decides she wanted to tell me
such things as you have described, she would tell me herself. It would not
be needed to go into each other's minds and force it out. But to go through
with this procedure when she does not even KNOW about it." Giles trailed
off again and shook his head. He looked up this time, his ice blue eyes
locking with Jenny's dark, chocolate ones. "That is rape."
Again, Jenny's face darkened. She stood up for the second time and advanced
forward.
"You are unwilling to do what must be done," she said icily and bitterly.
"You don't have the strength to go through with it. You only think of her
as your Slayer, don't you. Look at yourself right now for God's sake!
You're not behaving like a Watcher would, not even a caring friend! If you
were truly concerned about her, you'd do it, even though it might mean
breaking the trust between you two. You'd do it because the girl needs
help! And you dare call yourself a Watcher!"
Giles was silent again, and when he spoke it was with the same calm voice
he had used before.
"No, I'm not her Watcher." Jenny smiled smugly, believing she had finally
won him over with his admittance. Again he locked eyes with her, boring
through hers with his gaze, and making sure his words reached her not only
in content but emotion. "I'm her family."
She inhaled sharply and pursed her lips, which went white under the
pressure. Anger flashed across her face. She stormed to the door and
grabbed her jacket.
"If this leads to Willow getting hurt, or worse." Jenny fixed his gaze. "It
will be your fault. Her blood will be on your hands, Watcher." She left,
slamming the door behind her.
Rupert picked up the box next to his chair and put it back in his weapons
cabinet. He secured the main lock, then fixed the padlock in its place.
Normally he didn't bother, but he felt that extra security was needed
tonight. At least until tomorrow afternoon. He walked over to the decanter
on the table opposite the cabinet and poured himself a small glass of dark,
amber liquid. He looked at it and sighed for a second before taking it into
his mouth and swallowing it in one gulp, then slammed the glass down onto
the table. He poured himself another, but just as he was about to take it
into his mouth he dropped the glass and cried out in surprise. The glass
fell to the floor and rolled onto its side, spilling out ten or twelve
maggots.
Giles looked at the floor for a few seconds before walking briskly to the
door and putting on his jacket, making sure the car keys were inside it. He
looked at the decanter before he left the house, now brimming over with the
maggots and he left, shaken.
--------------------------------------------------
Xander inhaled, feeling the burn of the hot, acrid smoke filling his lungs.
He exhaled a few seconds later, blowing the smoke out in a lance shape into
the night air. He could feel the calming nicotine begin to flow throughout
his system, feel it pacifying his anger and nullifying his sadness to an
extent. He sniffed and wiped away the blood and tears, not wanting his best
friend to see him like this. GOD DAMMIT! He thought suddenly, screaming at
himself. WHY THE FUCK ARE THINGS SO MESSED UP?
He sighed heavily, exhaling. He realised suddenly that he'd gone through
the first cigarette and had lit a second. He mentally shrugged, he'd had
trauma. He glanced to his left as Willow sat down next to him, and looked
back at his glowing cigarette as she picked up the packet and took one out.
The glowing red end attracted Xander's gaze as it burned away, consuming
the tobacco beneath it and releasing the smoke into the night sky. At a
nudge from Willow he fished into his pockets and brought out his matches,
which he gave to the red head. She struck one on the touch-paper and he
listened out for the familiar crackle as the first strands of tobacco
caught fire. She inhaled the flame into the cigarette and exhaled quickly,
sparking drags sucked. She let it hang in the air for a second before
taking the first proper drag, feeling the same calming effect begin to work
its way into her system ever so slightly. A long period of silence passed
between the pair, both dragging on their respective cigarettes and exhaling
into the night, Willow waiting for Xander to speak, and Xander waiting for
his mind to clear.
"I'm sorry." he croaked after a while. Willow looked over at him.
"Sorry for what?"
"I'm sorry you had to see that. I'm sorry you saw where I came from. I'm
sorry you're involved in.this." He trailed off, his voice breaking on the
word 'in'. Willow put her arm around his shoulder and he leaned his head on
hers, whispering his apology over and over. Eventually she brought his head
up with her finger crooked under her chin. She wiped a drying streak of
blood from his face and stroked his cheek with her thumb.
"Shhhhhhhh." she gently whispered, still stroking his cheek. Her black nail
varnish caught the moon and flashed in her eyes, bringing with her a flash
of realisation in that moment. That situation, that pose.everything stop
for Willow as time ground to a halt with the truth of what she felt.
Suddenly time regained its grip on her reality and began to move forward
again.
They say the eyes are the window to the soul.
Willow looked into Xander's eyes and held his gaze as she spoke, never
breaking contact.
"Xander, you're my best friend in the world. You've been here for me all
throughout the hardest time in my life. I couldn't ever hope to know a
better person than you, I would never ask to know anyone other than you. I
love you, and don't let anyone else ever tell you you're anything less than
you are. A wonderful person."
She leaned forward a few inches so the tip of their noses touched slightly,
ever so slightly. She closed her eyes slowly and brought his head forward
with her hand. Their lips brushed gently at first, a small t ouch. Then she
took his unshaven top lip in between hers and deepened the kiss. They
stayed for a few seconds before they broke apart and opened their eyes,
still looking directly at each others.
Xander opened his mouth to say something, when Billy screamed Willow's
name. Her head whipped round to where he was standing by the gate. His arm
was outstretched, pointing down the road and his face had blanched. She
turned her head around again slowly, knowing what she would see.
The ugly man lumbered into view, the moonlight reflecting off his skin.
"What the f." Xander started, but broke off as Willow grabbed his hand and
pulled him up.
"BILLY!" she shouted, and grasped his hand as he joined her side. She
released her friend's and ran with them along the street. "Turn left at the
next corner," she gasped. "We'll lose him at the next junction." Xander
looked at her questioningly as they ran. "I'll explain later."
"You'd better." He said between breaths, and looked at her meaningfully.
She didn't miss the double entendre. She broke eye contact and looked over
at Billy. He was keeping up remarkably well for a kid his age.
They reached the corner and swerved around it. If Willow's memory served,
they should now be on 23rd Street.
Only they weren't on 23rd Street.
The trio skidded to a halt on a linoleum floor. Overhead, a cement ceiling
was broken in regular intervals by circular lights. Lockers ringed either
side of the hallway, again, broken at regular intervals, although this time
by classroom doors.
They were back in school.
--------------------------------------------------
They walked through the hallway, peering through the doors of classrooms
they passed by. The school was completely deserted, or at least this wing
of it was. Willow tried not to think about how they managed to get to
school, enough bizarreness had happened for one day in her life, and this
she could do without. However, she had an overriding feeling that they were
here for a reason.
And she didn't like that feeling.
They passed what felt like the fiftieth classroom, and it was exactly the
same as the others. The emptiness wasn't unnerving because it was just
empty, it was as if no one had ever been there. The halls were completely
devoid of litter, of graffiti and of the other items that you associate
with a used school. In the classrooms, all the tables were perfectly lined
up and the blackboards were actually black and unmarked by dust.
Not a word was exchanged between the trio as they walked up the corridor.
Eventually they became aware of an obstruction ahead and they all looked
forwards. About fifteen metres away a door marked the end of the corridor.
They stated towards it quickly at first, clearing most of the gap, but
slowed down towards the end, eventually stopping about two feet away from
it. Willow looked at Xander and Billy, and they both nodded. Just as Willow
turned the door handle however, Billy shouted out.
"No.wait!"
But it was too late. The trio stood in the doorway as it swung open lazily,
as if bored with the situation. The door fell open all the way onto its
hinges and stayed there, affording a wide view into the room.
It was a massacre.
Students lay over desks, over chairs, and over each other. Their throats
had been ripped out, they'd been disembowled, they'd been decapitated,
they'd been hung from the bar light. However, the overwhelming majority of
the corpses had massive neck trauma. Vampires.
Billy turned around and vomited. Xander stood in mute shock.
Willow took two slow steps into the room, her eyes flicking around the room
at the scenes of carnage. Blood had been splattered all over the walls and
the windows had been tinted with it, so that the moonlight that filtered in
cast an eerie crimson glow over everything.
Willow's eyes were fixed on the whiteboard.
Written in blood, smeared like some cheap paint, were four words.
"You Will All Die."
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Giles pulled up in front of the school. His brain had got past some of the
block that was stopping him from making any sense of printed words, but he
could only recognise numbers. As a result, he'd been able to drive fairly
safely.
He stepped out of his car and pulled his sports bag out. The clacking of
wood against plastic and against metal gave away the contents. Giles shut
the door and locked his car.
He turned and started walking towards the main entrance, then stopped. A
figure waited for him on top of the steps, sitting on the wall casually and
throwing him a wave. It was a man he hadn't seen in over twenty years, a
man he thought was dead.
His father.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
End Chapter 3.
Jamie
jamie@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
"So go ahead and label me an asshole cuz I can accept responsibility for
what I've done, but not for who I am." - NOFX, 'Don't Call Me White'
http://www.buffywillow.com
Glory: Funny. 'Cause I look around at this world you're so eager to be a
part of ... and all I see is six billion lunatics looking for the fastest
ride out. Who's not crazy? Look around. Everyone's drinking, smoking,
shooting up ... shooting each other, or just plain screwing their brains
out 'cause they don't want 'em anymore. *I'm* crazy? Honey, I'm the
original one-eyed chicklet in the kingdom of the blind. 'Cause at least I
admit the world makes me nuts.
Xander: Yeah, I'm gonna have to go with deadboy on this one.
Angel: Could you not call me that?