Fic: Restless (4/6) Buffy/Willow

["Electronis Zappa" <electronis@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

ABOUT TIME! This one was mercifully short, but needed some tweaking to
work with what I?ve been doing. The next two are going to be about as
much fun as listening to Shatner and Nimoy do a Zeppelin tribute. No
clue where that came from, I promise never to mention it again.
 
Title: Restless (4/6)
Author: Electronis
Email: electronis@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Rating: PG13 if only for the end
Pairing: Buffy/Willow, Xander/Anya, other 
Spoilers: 422 ? Restless should cover it.
Disclaimer: You know the drill, Joss owns Buffy, Kevin Smith owns
Chasing Amy 
Feedback: Most definitely.
Archive: my site www.electroniszappa.com. Anyone who wants it for
theirs, just let me know where it's going 
Summary: Giles dreams
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Previously:
The last thing she sees before she falls asleep is Giles peacefully
sleeping in the easy chair.
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Giles wakes to find that they are now watching ?Chasing Amy?. On the
screen Joey Lauren Addams is talking to Ben Affleck on the phone wearing
nothing but a Toronto Maple Leafs Jersey. Just then, there was a knock
at the door.
 
?Who could that be??
 
?We got hungry while you were asleep so we ordered a pizza.? Willow
answers him, more focused on the cute blonde on the TV.
 
?Pepperoni and Garlic?? Giles asks, getting up to answer the door.
 
?Moose and squirrel.? Buffy tells him before she starts kissing
Willow?s neck.
 
?Even better?
 
When Giles opens the door, he finds he?s now in a tux, and he?s entering
a small room where Buffy is getting prepared for her wedding.
 
?Buffy, you look lovely. Willow is such a lucky woman. I?m so proud of
both you. You?re like the children I never had.?
 
?That?s why I wanted you to give me away. I?m just glad ?little sis?
could behave long enough to be my maid of honor.?
 
?Uh, B, might want to rethink the ?maid? part.?
 
?Yes, thank you for that Faith? Giles says as he takes off his glasses
to give them the customary cleaning. ?I?m going to go check to see if
Willow?s ready, then I?ll be right back.? With that, he turns back
around and exits the door he had just came through, to wind up in a
cemetery near a familiar crypt, with lawn gnomes all around the entrance
that Spike is leaning out of.
 
?HEY! Come on! You?re going to miss everything.?
 
As Giles enters the crypt, he finds Christopher Walken standing near the
entrance.
 
?I serve?no purpose?in this?dream? Giles walks by him without a second
thought.
 
?I?ve hired myself out as an attraction? Spike?s in black and white,
posing for people snapping pictures and muttering the occasional ?ooh?
and ?ah?
 
?Side show freak??
 
?Is it that obvious? At least it?s show biz.?
 
?Didn?t Buffy kill you??
 
?Your point??
 
?You?re dust?
 
?So??
 
?Why am I arguing with dust??
 
?This is your brain, not mine, I don?t have one anymore.?
 
?Has to have been something I ate.? With that, he starts walking out of
the crypt. Near the door, he finds a man in suit with cheese slices
covering him.
 
?I wear the cheese, it does not wear me.?
 
?Honestly I meet the most appalling sort of people.? Giles replies as he
exits the crypt, to wind up at the Bronze. Xander, Willow, and Tara are
sitting on a couch near the stage.
 
?So Sorry I?m late. There?s a great deal going on. And all at once.?
 
?Don?t we know it! Look at Xander.?
 
?Got the sucking chest wound swinging. I promised Anya I?d be there for
our big night. But now I?ll probably being pushing up daises in the
sense of being in the ground underneath them and fertilizing the soil by
decomposition.? On stage, Anya walks up to the microphone.
 
?Ok. A man walks into the office of a doctor. He?s wearing on his head
um?.wait, there?s there?s a there?s a duck. Is that right??
 
?You suck? comes a voice in the crowd.
 
?Quiet, you?ll miss the humorous conclusion.?
 
?She?s doing quite well? Giles offers.
 
?Do you know this is your fault??
 
?We have to think of the facts Tara. I?m very busy, I have a gig myself
you know.?
 
?Something?s after us. It?s like some primal, animal force.? Xander
tells him.
 
?That used to be us.?
 
?Don?t get linear on me now man?
 
?And then the duck tells the doctor that ?There?s a man that?s attached
to my ass.?? Everyone in club starts laughing. ?See it was the duck
and NOT the man that spoke.? Everyone applauds her, and she walks off
stage.
 
?Rupert, we?ve got to focus. You must have some kind of explanation.
If we don?t know what we?re fighting, I don?t think we stand a chance.?

 
?Strange, it?s not like anything we?ve faced before.? Giles starts
singing. He gets up and makes his way to the stage, where a band begins
playing. The crowd cheers
 
?But it seems familiar somehow
Of course! 
The spell we cast with Buffy
Must have released 
Some primal evil,
That?s come back seeking, 
I?m not sure what.
Willow, look through the chronicles
For some reference to a warrior beast
I?ve got to warn Buffy!
There?s every chance she might be next!
Or Willow.
And Xander, try not to bleed on my couch
I just had it steam cleaned.? At this point, the audience has their
lighters lit and raised above their head swaying to the music.
 
?No wait...? are the last words Giles is able to get out before
something causes feedback in the sound system. He traces the wires
backstage. He finds a pocket watch in the middle of a mess of wires.
?Well this is all obvious and expected, and fairly unoriginal.? He
says. Behind him, he hears the first slayer get in position. ?I know
who you are, and I can defeat by my intellect. I can cripple you with
my thoughts. Of course, you underestimate me. You couldn?t know.? She
starts cutting into his forehead. ?You never had a watcher?? are his
last thoughts as everything fades to black.
 
In the living room, he starts shaking, and drops his glasses, with
Willow still sleeping peacefully nearby on the couch in Buffy?s arms.
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Beautiful thing, the destruction of words 
 
Tillotson 1984
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Y ddraig goch ddry cychwyn
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Electronis Zappa
<http://www.electroniszappa.com> www.electroniszappa.com