Life is Short (revamped) Part 4a/7

["TheBear" <thebear@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

Title: Life is Short (Revamped)

Author: The Bear!

Spoilers: kinda spins away from Welcome to the Hellmouth, and there's
elements of the Harvest as well, so no real spoilers, unless you've
never seen the show at all.

Pairing: B/W

Summary: Buffy moves to a new town looking for a fresh start, and maybe
a new love.

Warnings: NC17 (but not really till part 7) 

Disclaimer: If I owned 'em, they'd have to show it on the Ecstasy
Network.

Author's Note: If you've read this before, you're in for a surprise!
It's nearly twice as long, and extensively revamped, so, give it another
shot!

========== BtVS ==========

Part 4

========== BtVS ==========

"Well, I have to say, this is unexpected!" Joyce Summers said as she
came downstairs into the kitchen. She made a show of looking at her
watch and noted, "It's almost a full hour earlier than Buffy's normal
wakeup time, and yet; here she is, showered, dressed and rapidly
consuming a bowl of cornflakes!"

Buffy rolled her eyes, thinking 'Jeeze, Drama much?' She finished her
mouthful and couldn't help the fact that her mouth stretched into a huge
grin as she said, "Morning, mom!" 

'And now begins the interrogation,' she thought, but even so, Buffy just
couldn't keep the silly grin off of her face. 

Buffy felt absolutely giddy this morning, even though she hadn't gotten
a lot of sleep. She'd had the most wonderful dreams last night. The
vampire nightmare that had been waking her up every night for a week was
blissfully absent. All of her dreams had been about a certain redhead.
Some had been sexual, but not all. Some had just been sweet and
romantic.

Joyce echoed her daughter's smile. "I haven't seen that smile in a
while!" she said.

Buffy shrugged her shoulders. "I'm happy today!" Inwardly, she added
all the things she couldn't say aloud, 'No scary vampire dreams... many,
many happy Willow dreams... how could I not be happy!'

Her mom gave her a look that said she knew there was more to it than
that. "And happiness made you wake up over an hour early?" she asked
with a smirk. 

"I'm walking to school with somebody this morning. We're supposed to
get there a little early and meet up with some people in the library,"
Buffy explained.

Oh?" her mom asked, feigning nonchalance. "And this 'somebody' you're
walking to school with... Does he have a name?"

Again Buffy rolled her eyes, 'You're so not fooling anyone, Mom!' she
thought. 'time for a little fun...' Buffy grinned even harder and
answered cryptically, "No, and yes."

Joyce put her hands on her hips an raised a single eyebrow. "Buffy..."
she mock-growled.

'Gotcha!' Buffy laughed and got up to rinse out her bowl. "No, it's not
a he, and yes, she has a name." She paused for a moment until she
though her mom was just about to growl again and then continued, "Her
name is Willow Rosenberg."

"Hmm, I could have sworn that was a 'new boyfriend' smile," her mom
said. 

Buffy coughed suddenly, blushing furiously. 'Oh, God, you have *no*
idea how close you are!' she thought with a sudden thrill of anxiety.
Desperate to cover, she stammered, "I uh, I have a 'new boyfriend
smile'?"

Her mom took a turn a the victory smile before saying, "Well, I haven't
seen it in quite a while, but I distinctly remember such a thing."

'Oh this is *so* not a conversation I'm ready to have right now. Maybe
later... like when I'm fifty...' Buffy thought apprehensively.

Joyce walked over to the sink, taking the bowl Buffy had rinsed and
putting it in the dishwasher. "Whatever the reason, I'm just glad to
have Happy-Buffy for once rather than the Sulky-Buffy," she said.

"Mom!" Buffy exclaimed indignantly.

Her mom just stared at her silently, raising one eyebrow.

Buffy's shoulders slumped, "Ok, so maybe I haven't been all joyful and
frolicky lately..."

"You think?" her mom asked with no little sarcasm in her voice

"Well," Buffy dragged out, casting for something to say. "You said it
yourself, right? New town, new Buffy," said with her smile back on her
face. 'And, new Willow! New to me, anyway," she gleefully thought to
herself,

"So you don't need a ride to school then?" her mom asked, apparently
satisfied to return to mundane topics for the moment.

"Uh, no thanks Mom." Buffy answered. 'Yeah, not if I want any
opportunity for a good morning kiss!' "We're good with the walking
thing this morning. Thanks anyway!" she said as she grabbed her bag and
headed for the door.

'Mmm... Willowlips!' was the prevailing thought on her mind as she
exited the Summers home.

========== BtVS ==========

"Did it really happen?" Willow Rosenberg asked her reflection in the
mirror. She was standing in the entryway to her home, looking at the
full-length mirror that adorned the wall by the front door.

"My first kiss!" Willow squealed excitedly. 'Ok, I so need to stop
saying it like that!' she chastised herself, feeling embarrassment dim
her excitement slightly. 'Oh God, I'm such a spaz!' she thought as her
reflection showed her deep blush.

"It's just, my first kiss!" she huffed. 'I was starting to think it'd
never happen! And with a girl...' Willow saw her reflection's smile dim
slightly as her mind began to wander down a path she'd been shying from.

"Is that so wrong? Is everyone gonna hate me cause I like a girl?" she
whispered.

'Doofus! No one likes you now, what's the difference?' she thought
darkly.

"That's not true! Buffy likes me!" Willow said, as though arguing with
her reflection. "And Xander and Jesse! They like me too. And, well
maybe that's all, but who cares? Not me, that's for sure..."

'Yeah right.'

Suddenly Willow's eyes widened in horror, "Oh God! Xander and Jesse!
What're they gonna say?" she cried softly.

'What if they don't want to be my friends any more?' she worried.
Willow wrapped her arms around herself, feeling her stomach sink at the
thought.

She quietly stared at her image in the mirror until she saw a tear well
out of her eye and threaten to come down her cheek. Angrily she
clenched her jaw and scrubbed at her eyes, wiping away the potential
tears. "No! That's not gonna happen! Xander and Jesse *are* my
friends, even if Xander's too dumb to notice that I was in love with him
for, like, ever... they're just gonna hafta deal!" She nodded her head,
as if it was settled.

"Besides, they're gonna be too busy staring at us kissing to be mad..."
She smiled this time as she saw her reflection's face grow red once
more. 'Oh boy, can that girl kiss! I mean, maybe I don't have anything
to compare to, but... whoo!'

Her face transitioned again, becoming contemplative as she thought,
'This is all so strange; I've got all these... fluttery feelings... for
another girl. And I don't think I ever looked at girls like that
before! It's just...'

After struggling for a moment to come up with an adjective adequate to
describe her feelings, Willow whispered, "So good!" She closed her eyes
and hugged herself again, but not in fear this time. 'Oh God, that
kiss...' she thought of Buffy's goodnight kiss last night. 'she was all
pressed up against me... and... and...'

Willow groaned when she felt her nipples tighten into hard little
points, suddenly sensitive against the cotton fabric of her bra. Her
nether regions began to feel heavy and moist, 'Oh God, just like last
night... I wish I could just... just..."

She growled in frustration, "God! I am so pathetic! I can't even think
it, let alone say it!"

'And I certainly can't do it! I'm such a spaz!' she thought,
remembering her fumbling attempts at relieving herself the previous
night. "I bet Buffy doesn't have any trouble... Oh gosh! I wonder if
she... last night..." Willow trailed off with a whimper, now even more
aroused and frustrated. 

"Argh!" Willow shouted, turning from the mirror and stomping off to the
powder room to splash water on her face. 'Calm down Willow! You're
gonna freak Buffy out if you don't get a hold of yourself!' she thought
as she brought handful after handful of cold water against her hot skin.
'Thinking about Xander never made me feel like this!' she griped,
annoyed with her body's reactions.

Finally, when her face was almost numb from the cold, she grabbed a
towel and blotted her face. Looking in the mirror over the sink, she
grumbled, "I have to be the biggest geek in Sunnydale... so what does a
superhero see in someone like me?"

========== BtVS ==========

Buffy Summers came to an abrupt stop in front of the Rosenberg house.
'Note to self, don't sprint to girlfriend's house anymore!' she thought
as she ran her fingers through her now-windblown hair.

After she rearranged her hair, Buffy was about to move toward the house
when a sudden thought stopped her. "Girlfriend. God, I have a
girlfriend!" she breathed out in awe, her face stretched into a broad
smile. 

'Oh, school should be fun...' she thought, her smile dimming. It
dropped away entirely as she added, 'Ugh! My mother! So not a
conversation I'm looking forward to!'

Buffy stared at Willow's door for a moment, lost in thought. 'This is
gonna be really hard, isn't it? Not just for me, either...' 

'Oh, Willow... God, the sounds you made, your lips on mine... you body
against mine...' Buffy whimpered as the feelings from last night
returned to her. "I am not giving this up!" she growled suddenly. She
began to walk up to the house, muttering, "Unless you change your mind,
I am *not* letting you go, Willow Rosenberg!"

Buffy strode up to the front door and rapped loudly upon it. 'Easy, no
breaking down doors today Buffy!' she thought with a wry smile.

Buffy was bouncing on her toes slightly as she heard footsteps approach
the door. When it swung open, Buffy froze, staring at the girl before
her. Willow's hair was pulled back in a high ponytail, emphasizing her
widow's peak, and leaving her delicate ears exposed. 

'And since when am I turned on by ears!?' Buffy shivered at the sudden
mental image of nibbling on one of those earlobes, hearing the sound of
Willow whimpering in pleasure. 'God, it's gonna be a long day,' she
thought ruefully.

Willow stared back at Buffy, not speaking for several seconds. Then
suddenly she seemed to snap out of it, giving her head a little shake
and saying, "Uh, good morning! Hi! Uh, you... wanna come in?" The last
was delivered with an audible gulp. 

'Want. Want Willow' Buffy thought in a daze as she entered the house.

Willow's voice was a little unsteady as she asked, "Uh are ya hungry?"

'Yes, hungry for Willowsmoochies!' Buffy's eyes were focused on Willow's
pink lips as she just nodded her in response to the redhead's question.

Willow closed the door behind her and said, "Uh, I've got raisin
bran..." trailing off when Buffy shook her head and stepped closer to
her.

Buffy backed the redhead up against the door- from the inside this time-
and softly spoke, "I had something else in mind."

Willow got out, "Oh!" before Buffy's cut off any further speech-
suckling Willow's lips for a moment before her tongue sought entrance to
the redhead's mouth.

Buffy barely noticed Willow's hands twining in her hair, her attention
was focused on devouring the girl's mouth. 'Mmm, minty mouthwash...
and... and... Oh Willow... you taste so... you make me feel so...'

Buffy broke off the kiss and rested her forehead against Willow's.
"Gotta stop!" she whispered between deep breaths.

"Mm, donwanna!" Willow whimpered as she too sought to catch her breath.

'Oh God!' Buffy thought, images of what could happen in the next few
moments if she gave in to her body's desire. 'No, no... way too soon,
don't... can't... take advantage of you like that... God you make me
so... so!' She forced herself to pull back just far enough to focus on
Willow's eyes. 'So green... green... means go... No! Bad Buffy!' she
chastised herself.

Still breathing hard, Buffy licked her lips and smiled. "Now *that's*
'good morning'!" she exclaimed.

Willow smiled, still breathing deeply herself, nodded her head, and
agreed, "Oh yes! Very, very good morning that was."

'Ok Slayer, back away from the redhead!' Buffy giggled at the thought,
making it sound in her head like it was a police bullhorn. She dropped
her hands from around Willow and stepped back, letting the girl move. 

Willow pushed away from the door, then half turned, looked at the door,
looked back at Buffy and said, "I'm sensing a pattern..."

Buffy blushed when she realized what Willow was referring too. 

Willow giggled, "You like doors... or is it just this door?"

Buffy laughed out loud at that. "I'm not prejudiced, Willow. I'd like
you up against walls, counters, doors..."

The blonde suddenly channeled an x-rated Dr. Suess, thinking, 'I would
eat you against a door, I would eat you on the floor. I would eat you
on your pillow; anywhere you want to, Willow...' She felt her whole
body grow flushed and castigated her self, 'Bad, bad Buffy! No more sex
thoughts!' 

Buffy dropped her eyes in embarrassment, but couldn't help thinking,
'Yeah, right. That's gonna last... oh too late!' as more naughty images
played in her head.

"Uh, Buffy? C- can I, uh, ask you something?" Willow's stuttered
question broke Buffy's reverie.

'Uh oh...' Buffy looked back up at a nervous Willow's face and said,
"Uh, sure," she answered.

When Willow's question wasn't immediately forthcoming, Buffy took the
redhead's hand in hers and pulled her over to a couch in what was
obviously their living room. 'Nervous, I get that. It's all new, but
we'll make it work!' Buffy thought. Sitting down, she pulled the
redhead down next to her and said, "Willow, you can ask me anything you
want, any time you want."

"What are we?" Willow blurted out, and then she blushed and dropped her
eyes. "I mean... I've never... I don't know... We..." Willow's free
hand was gesturing wildly as she was apparently having trouble
explaining what she was thinking. 

Buffy smiled at her, realizing, 'Babbling... going to be a big part of
the Willow-experience, I'm thinking. It's ok, It's kinda cute!'

Willow stopped and let out a frustrated sigh. Looking up at Buffy
again, her voice was high and soft as she said, "I don't know how this
works. Us, I mean. Together."

Buffy dropped her eyes to their joined hands and fretted, 'What exactly
are you asking here?' She stroked the back of Willow's hand and
hesitantly asked, "You mean, because we're both girls?" .

"Uh, that too, but I mean... I never, um... I've never been an 'Us'
before. With anybody," Willow admitted, sounding sheepish.

"Oh!" Buffy got it. "You've, uh... never gone out with a boy either?"
she asked. 'God, how did no one ever see what I see in you? You're,
like, amazing!'

Willow sounded ashamed when she quietly replied, "Uh, no..."

Buffy cupped Willow's face in her palms and tilted it up till she could
meet her eyes. "Willow, you have nothing to be ashamed of!" she leaned
forward and softly kissed the shamefaced redhead. "Willow, seriously, I
have to tell you; I *so* don't understand how the boys in that school
could have missed you! I knew from the second I saw you at that water
fountain that I wanted you." 

'Oh yes, I love your smile!' Buffy thought happily. 'Mission reassure
the girlfriend is a success!' Buffy thought, her mind playfully making
it sound like some kind of control-tower chatter. 'Like NASA!' she
thought with a smile. 'Roger, Houston, we have smile!'

"Oh, ok... good... Um, so... what happens now?" Willow asked, looking
nervous again but still smiling.

'You mean other than the part where I jump you right here and now on the
couch?' was Buffy's immediate thought. 'Jeeze, lust much!?'

"Well, um..." Buffy stalled, trying to think beyond her hormones.
"Well, some of this is new to me too, Willow. I've always, well, you
know, liked other girls... but I've never officially dated a girl
before."

"Are we dating?" Willow asked, sounding pleased at the thought.

"Well, we could kinda consider last night at the ice cream shop a first
date," Buffy began. "I'd like to think we'll go on some more regular
dates." She laughed and added, "We kinda skipped the dating step and
went right for emotional trauma, followed by smoochies."

Willow blushed again, obviously embarrassed about the night before.

'Dang it! I hate the taste of shoe leather!' Buffy rebuked herself as
she caught the look. "Hey now! It ended good, that's what matters!"
she said firmly. As she continued, her voice was less sure, and she
could feel her heart beating fast. "Anyway, I was kinda thinking... we
could skip the 'just dating' part and move to... girlfriends?" She
quickly continued before Willow had a chance to say anything, "I know we
both have a bunch of 'getting to know you' stuff to get to, and... and I
want to... but if it's ok... I just wanna be able to tell people... that
you're my..."

"Girlfriend?" Willow whispered.

Buffy nodded her head slowly, looking for a response. 'Say yes, please
Willow, say yes...'

Willow's face lit up, "Wow! Buffy Summers is my girlfriend," she said,
as though trying it on for size.

'Thank you God!!' Buffy's smile lit up the room, "Willow Rosenberg is my
girlfriend!" she said happily.

Buffy moved in for a celebratory kiss, and was delighted to find Willow
meeting her halfway.

'Oh Willow... so good!' Buffy thought happily as she kissed her
girlfriend. She savored the redhead's lips, nipping them with her own,
tangling her tongue with Willow's, exploring her teeth and gums...
'smells like heaven, tastes like heaven, feels like heaven... wanna stay
here forever!'

"Buff-mff... Mgffy... Buffy!" Willow finally got out.

Buffy felt Willow's hands on her face, stilling her movements, and
opened her eyes. 'Oh God, you're so beautiful!' Buffy thought, feeling
her heart squeeze in her chest at the look of returned desire on
Willow's face.

"Buffy, we... we have to go." Willow panted out.

Buffy pouted, "Don't wanna!"

'Hey when did we lay down?' the Slayer wondered when she finally noticed
her position. She was laying on top of Willow who was laid out on the
couch. "Oh, sorry Will," she mumbled as she sat back up.

Willow looked confused, she asked, "Sorry? Why?"

Buffy gestured to the couch next to them, feeling embarrassed. "I
pushed you down..." she mumbled.

Willow smiled and said, "Oh, good."

'Ok, officially confused now...' she thought. "Good?" she asked.

Willow giggled, "Yeah, cause I though I was the one who pulled you
down..."

'Wha?' Buffy's eyes widened in surprise, "Willow! Are you teasing me?"

At Willow's bold grin and nod, Buffy huffed, "Why you... you...
beautiful, sexy, adorable girl" Buffy felt arousal coursing through her
as she thought, 'Want you so much!'

Buffy was pleased to see Willow's eyes dilate in arousal to match her
own lust. Just as she was leaning forward, the redhead interrupted.

"Ah, Buffy? If you do that we're gonna be really, really late..."
Willow said in a breathy voice.

"Uh huh... not seeing the problem here Will..." Buffy whispered, her
eyes focusing on her girlfriend's tantalizingly moist lips.

Willow smiled indulgently, "I know... but, uh, you told Xander we'd meet
him at the..." her voice trailed off and her face took on a look of
fear.

Buffy stiffened in fear of her own at the look. "What?" she asked,
alarmed. 'Please don't be having second thoughts... I'll just die!'

Willow's voice was hesitant as she answered, "Uh, when you said... you
want to tell people..."

"That you're my girlfriend?" Buffy asked, her voice squeaking the
question. 'You have feelings for him, don't you?' Buffy asked silently,
suddenly afraid again.

Willow dropped her eyes, causing Buffy's fear to ratcheted up a notch.
'You do! Oh God!'

"Is this about Xander?"

Willow nodded, still not meeting the blonde's gaze.

Buffy's voice was a pale shade of her normal vivaciousness as she said,
"You... you don't want to tell him about us?"

Willow's head snapped up and she looked shocked. "No! Buffy, I can't
hide this from him! He's been my best friend, like forever! Xander and
Jesse are, like, my only friends... period. We have to tell them, it's
just..."

'Whazzahuh?' Buffy's brain suddenly fried, confusion overwhelming the
fear. "I... huh?" she sputtered.

"Oh Buffy, what if they hate me?" Willow cried.

'Oh thank God!!' Buffy began panting like she'd just run a marathon.
"You're afraid they will be mad because you're with another girl!" she
stated for confirmation.

Willow nodded miserably, her lip pouting fiercely. 

Buffy felt a cool shiver or relief pour through her. She wrapped the
redhead in her arms and cried, "Oh God! You scared me!"

"I scared you?" Willow questioned, clearly bewildered.

Buffy let go and clasped her hands together in front of her. "I...
well, I kinda got the impression that you had a crush on Xander and... I
thought you might be... having... second thoughts... or something,"
Buffy said, her eyes down and her hands clenching and unclenching.

It was Willow's turn to be the reassuring one. "Buffy, Xander doesn't
want me..." before Buffy could protest, she added, "And, even if he
did... it's too late for him." She grabbed Buffy's clenching hands and
held them between her own. "I'm with you, Buffy. As long as you want
me I'm yours," she added softly.

"I feel so stupid Willow," Buffy said, chagrined. 

"You're not stupid!" Willow responded.

'I'm so lost in you Willow Rosenberg!' Buffy thought with a pang in her
chest. She looked up into her girlfriend's eyes and whispered, "I don't
think you get it Willow, I've known you, like, two days, and... and I
already couldn't do without you..."

Buffy dropped her gaze again, thinking, 'Great, emotional wreck much?
She's gonna run screaming, and that's if I'm lucky!'

Again Buffy felt her girlfriend's warm hands on her face, gently nudging
her upward till she met the redhead's gaze. "I get it. I so get it,
Buffy!"

Buffy searched the redhead's eyes for a moment, then closed her own and
leaned her forehead against Willow's. "Thank you Willow! Thank you so
much. I... I'm sorry for being such a goober..."

"Shh," Willow said, and Buffy once again felt the redhead's lips on her
own.

The kiss was soft and sweet, and loving. When it ended, Buffy smiled
and said, "You're picking that up really fast, Will!"

Willow giggled, "Well, I'm a quick study..."

'Duh, here I am getting all weepy, and I completely spaced it that
Will's worried about Xander!' Buffy suddenly thought with a groan.

"What? It wasn't that bad," Willow said with an exaggerated pout.

"Huh?" Buffy asked, momentarily confused. Then she shook it off, "Oh!
No, not that, baby. I was thinking about the Xander thing."

Buffy hurriedly explained before Willow could get upset, "He's not gonna
be angry, Willow."

Willow sighed and picked up her book bag. Swinging it over her
shoulder, she said, "I'm sure you're right Buffy..." she said, sounding
less than convinced.

Scrambling to grab her own bag, the Slayer hastened to reassure the
redhead, "No, Will. I mean I know he won't be upset."

Willow stopped and turned to stare disbelievingly at Buffy. "What? How
can you be sure?" she asked.

"Remember last night when he wanted to talk to me alone for a minute?"
Buffy asked.

Willow nodded, "Between the vampire and the ice cream... and I feel
weird just saying that out loud..."

"Yeah, I get that, believe me," Buffy agreed bitterly. "Anyway...
Xander figured out I was crushing on you..."

"He did? How?" Willow interjected, taken aback.

'Maybe because I couldn't keep my eyes off you for two seconds?' Buffy
wondered silently. "Apparently I was pretty obvious to everyone who
wasn't you or me."

"I... I..." Willow stammered.

Buffy put her arm around her girlfriend's back and led her through the
front door. "Doesn't matter, we know now," she said happily. "The
point is, he was really cool about it..."

"Oh..." Willow said. She locked the door to her house and they began to
walk to school.

After they had reached the sidewalk, Willow said, "That's kinda too
bad..."

"Huh?" Buffy asked.

"Well, it might have been kinda fun to surprise him..." Willow said with
a grin.

"Well, he seemed to think you were pretty straight..." Buffy said. "He
might still be surprised... Plus there's Jesse."

"Oh, Xander won't be able to keep from telling Jesse all about it."
Willow said, sounding very certain.

"What else did he say?" Willow asked after another moment, sounding
curious. 

"Well," Buffy began, trying to remember the exact conversation. "Oh!
He threatened me," she said.

Willow's eyes widened in shock, "Xander Harris threatened you? Why?"
Willow asked. "And why'd you hug him if he threatened you?"

"Well..." Buffy started off. "He told me that he thought you were
straight, then he said that he loved you and you were his best friend
and whatever happened between you and me, if I hurt you, he'd kill me."

Willow stopped walking and turned to face her girlfriend. "That is
so..."

Buffy interjected, "Sweet?"

Willow nodded her head vigorously, "Yeah! Gosh, I didn't know he had it
in him!"

Buffy nodded as they started walking again. "Yeah, he seems like a
really good friend."

"Yeah, he is!" Willow said. 

They walked in silence for a few minutes, hands clasped and smiles on
their faces.

"Hey, Buffy?" Willow asked, breaking the silence.

"Yeah Will?" Buffy replied.

"When you were telling me about you and Xander's talk last night..."
Willow started.

"Yeah?" Buffy answered, thinking back to that conversation just a few
minutes ago.

"Did you call me 'Baby'?"

========== BtVS ==========

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