Fic: Within And Without (2/5)

["Jay" <Swanrvr80@xxxxxxx>]

Title: Within And Without

PART TWO

Buffy looked up at the soft knock at the door but Willow kept her 
face pressed against Buffy's shoulder.

"Sorry, the door was open and, um, I heard Willow crying," said 
Kennedy uneasily.  "Did something else happen?"

"I thought you were going to bed," said Willow, now quickly pulling 
away from Buffy and rubbing her eyes.

"There's no way I'm gonna fall asleep anytime soon," answered Kennedy 
sharply.

Willow looked up at her and nodded, convinced by Kennedy's concerned 
expression.

"Yeah.  Same here," frowned Willow.  She pointed at the mirror above 
the dresser.

Kennedy glanced in that direction, looked back at Willow, then 
twisted her head back to stare into the mirror.  She even took a few 
steps towards it before again looking back at Willow.

"I don't get it," said Kennedy.  "Why isn't...I don't get it."

"This is Sunnydale.  It doesn't have to make sense," sighed Buffy.

"Okay, you trying to tell me that Willow's a, a vampire?" laughed 
Kennedy nervously.

"Let's go with I've got the symptoms but I want a second opinion," 
said Willow, slowly extending her palm so that Kennedy could see the 
outline of the cross burned into her skin.  Kennedy glanced at the 
cross around Buffy's neck.

"But...but I was with you!  There was no biting, no sucking and see?  
I have a reflection," said Kennedy, pointing at the mirror.

"No biting, no...what the hell were you two doing?" asked Buffy, 
eyeing Willow suspiciously.

"I told you, I passed out.  Kennedy, we know you're not a vampire," 
said Willow, slumping her shoulders.  "Buffy, I need to go out, I 
need to do something.  I can't just sit here and feel sorry for 
myself!"

"Will, sunrise is only a few hours away," reminded Buffy ominously.

"Yeah, I know my curfew.  Look, there's very few people and even 
fewer nonpeoples that have this kind of power or access to it.  Maybe 
I can locate the source, sense it, find a clue, or, or whatever.  But 
not by sitting here," said Willow, raising her voice.

"I know.  But, see, I don't want you going alone," winced Buffy.  
Willow just looked at her for a moment, confused.

"You...you're not coming with?" asked Willow softly.

"We have another problem.  Spike.  He's in the basement.  There's 
something wrong with his chip.  It keeps misfiring for no reason," 
shrugged Buffy.

"No reason?  Maybe he's having thoughts he shouldn't be having," 
countered Willow quickly.  Buffy flinched.

"No, I don't think that's it.  But he's in a lot of pain and, and 
it's getting worse," grimaced Buffy.  Willow nodded and stood up but 
wouldn't look at Buffy.

"Will, I..."

"Don't worry about.  Seems like you have your hands full.  Again.  
Besides, I don't like you seeing me like this," said Willow, her 
voice trailing off.

"It's kinda a little late for that," countered Buffy.  "And, and it's 
not like you've gone all grr."

"Not yet," pouted Willow.  "But I'm a little uncomfortable with the 
idea of showing my bumpy bits in public."

Both Buffy and Kennedy raised their eyebrows in unison.

"Okay, that didn't quite...ya know, I need to leave.  Don't worry 
about me, I'll still be dead when I get back.  Same as Spike, I might 
add," added Willow coldly.

"Willow, I don't want you to go alone!" yelled Buffy, standing 
up.  "What if you pass out again?  Hello?  Sun rising soon!"

Willow looked at Kennedy.

"I'll go," nodded Kennedy.

"Willow, why don't you talk to Spike first?  Your symptoms?  He's 
kinda inside knowledge guy," nodded Buffy knowingly.

"I know what a vampire is, Buffy.  I've helped fight them for seven 
years now, remember?" barked Willow.

Buffy lowered her eyes.  Out of habit Willow tried to inhale a deep, 
calming breath but only frowned in frustration as she simply didn't 
know how.  It wasn't as if she had forgotten, it was more like she 
couldn't force her lungs to respond.

"How the hell does he smoke cigarettes?" whispered Willow.

"What?" asked Buffy.

"Nothing," said Willow, shaking her head and stepping close to 
Buffy.  "Look, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to sound so harsh."

"I know," smiled Buffy appreciatively.  She leaned in and Willow's 
eyes opened wide, anticipating Buffy would kiss her.  But instead 
Buffy pulled her in close with a hug.  Willow smiled at the embrace 
and decided to ignore Kennedy for the moment. 

"By the way, Spike isn't our only other problem," said Willow, 
turning her face to Buffy but speaking loudly enough for Kennedy to 
hear.  "I'm getting hungry and somehow I don't think mochas and a 
croissant are going to do the trick in the morning."

Buffy closed her eyes and nodded.

"I think there's some blood for Spike still in the fridge.  But I'll 
send Xander to the butcher's as soon as he opens," said Buffy 
bravely, sniffing once.  "Do you...do you think you could..."

"Drink blood?  I don't know," shrugged Willow.  "Really trying not to 
think about it right now."

Willow looked over at Kennedy and tried not to smile at the nauseous 
look on her face.

"Kennedy, open that top drawer over there," pointed Willow.

"Huh?  Oh, um, sure," nodded Kennedy.

"My silver cross is in there.  I want you to put it on."

Kennedy slid the drawer open and reached in, withdrew a silver chain 
and watched the cross dangle below her hand.  She glanced at the 
cross on Buffy's neck and noticed they were a matching pair.  Kennedy 
looked directly at Buffy...and Buffy lowered her eyes.

"Willow, I don't know.  Are you sure..."

"Put it on," ordered Willow firmly.

Kennedy nodded once and closed the chain's clasp around her neck, 
turning her back to hide her smile.  Willow hadn't missed Buffy's 
reaction when Kennedy took the cross.  Not wanting another argument 
that could only hurt Buffy's feelings, she quickly made her way to 
the door.

"Okay, gotta go," announced Willow.

"Willow, aren't you forgetting something?" asked Buffy, hands on her 
hips.  Willow froze.  Buffy tilted her head to one side, waiting.

"Um..."

Buffy walked slowly over to Willow with a slightly exaggerated swing 
in her hips, subtle yet noticable.  Willow glanced at Kennedy and 
then focused on Buffy with a confused stare, her eyes only getting 
wider as Buffy paused only inches from her face.  Willow finally 
blinked when, unseen by Kennedy, Buffy wet her lips with her tongue.  
Leaning in, Willow's voice was barely a whisper.

"Okay, is this some kind of marking your territory thingy?" frowned 
Willow, her eyes still drawn to Buffy's moist lips.  "I mean, if you 
want a kiss goodbye..."

"Willow, whatever are you talking about?" asked Buffy in a somewhat 
southern accent.  

"Huh?" managed Willow, again glancing at Kennedy who was obviously 
becoming intrigued by the scene unfolding before here.

"Don't you want to ask me something?" hinted Buffy.

"Um," repeated Willow in a timidly fearful response.

"I think you need an invite back in, no?  Wouldn't want to get locked 
out with the sun rising soon," smiled Buffy.

"Oh.  Oh, right!" nodded Willow just a bit too enthusiastically.

*****

"Hey, slow down!  One of us still has a breath to catch, remember?"

Willow ignored Kennedy, not even looking back at her.  Kennedy had to 
run to catch up.

"Okay, for someone who doesn't know where they're going you sure are 
in a big hurry!" complained Kennedy.

Willow eased her pace a bit and reluctantly nodded.

"Sorry.  It's just that I don't have much time," said Willow, 
glancing towards the eastern skyline.

"I get that.  So, that locator spell...not much help?" shrugged 
Kennedy.

"No," frowned Willow.  "Really just winging it right now."

"You'll figure this out.  I'll bet you look back on this and have a 
good laugh."

"Not really getting the humor.  Then again, maybe I should be 
laughing at myself," grumped Willow.

"Huh?  I don't...huh?"

Willow stopped walking and turned to face Kennedy.

"I probably did it to myself.  My spells have a habit of going all 
pfft!  Pfft and kaflooey even."

"But you weren't casting a spell at the time," said Kennedy.  And 
then her eyes lit up and she smiled.  "Though maybe I was."

Willow rolled her eyes and started walking again.

"Okay, what's the plan?  I mean, if you think you did this to 
yourself, why can't you fix it?"

"Something's blocking me," answered Willow.

"Oh.  But hey, see, that something means you weren't responsible," 
suggested Kennedy weakly.

"No, I'm responsible.  There's a reason I'm a vampire.  It's called 
guilt."

Kennedy grabbed Willow's arm and they stopped walking.  She didn't 
say anything but instead just waited for Willow to explain.

"Earlier this evening, I saw...I saw Buffy.  With Spike," said Willow 
softly, raising her eyebrows slightly.

"And you were jealous?" asked Kennedy, her face expressionless but 
her voice sympathetic.

Willow looked down at the ground.

"Oh," nodded Kennedy.  "So when you kissed me..."

"When you kissed me," corrected Willow quickly, glaring at Kennedy.  
Kennedy simply sighed.  Neither of them spoke or looked at one 
another for a moment.

"Vampire.  As in ex-boyfriend, as in what you think Buffy wants," 
said Kennedy.  "And this is your what, your punishment?"

"You don't have to stay with me," snapped Willow as she walked 
away.  "I'm feeling oh-so-not-light-headed at the moment."

"Willow, wait!  Willow!"

Willow walked briskly away but Kennedy didn't make an attempt to 
follow her.

"If you're to blame how to you explain Oz?" yelled Kennedy.

Willow stopped and lowered her head, then slowly turned around.  She 
stared at Kennedy and then shrugged.

"Didn't say I had it all figured out," whispered Willow, idly kicking 
at a pebble on the street.

Kennedy smiled.

"What?" said Willow, shaking her head.

"You're sexy when you pout," grinned Kennedy.

Willow shook her head.  And laughed.

"If you're going to tag along, do try to keep up," smiled Willow, 
turning and walking away, this time slowly enough for Kennedy to keep 
pace.

*****

Lying on a cot in the basement, Spike stared at the bloody rag in his 
hand and then slowly looked up at Buffy.  She forced herself to not 
look away.  Spike brought the rag up to his nose again and he looked 
away.  

It was there, in his eyes, even if just for a fleeting moment.  
Fear.  Buffy couldn't remember if Spike had ever revealed that 
emotion to her.

"We'll fix this.  I promise," whispered Buffy.

"Maybe.  Or...maybe not," said Spike calmly.  Buffy took in a deep 
breath and turned to walk away.

"Buffy?"

"Be right back.  I have a phone call to make," she said, turning back 
to look at him and smiling.  "Gotta see if the warranty on your chip 
expired."

"Expired.  Nice choice of word, that," groaned Spike.

*****

"Breath mint?" offered Kennedy, holding out her hand towards Willow.  
One corner of Willow's mouth rose in response and Kennedy quickly put 
the mints back into her pocket.

"Right.  No breath.  Smart one, girl," whispered Kennedy to herself.  
They walked on, neither talking, and Kennedy realized that Willow had 
slowed down.  A lot.  Kennedy didn't hear anything unusual and there 
wasn't much to see as the street they were on was poorly lit.  

"What?"

"Huh?  Oh, um, it's nothing.  Really," added Willow very 
unconvincingly.  She looked past Kennedy, her eyes searching the 
cemetery behind them.  Kennedy turned but didn't see anything.

Kennedy stopped, crossed her arms and raised her eyebrows at Willow, 
forcing Willow to stop walking.

"Okay.  It's, it's just that I'm a bit overwhelmed at the moment," 
moped Willow.

"Hey, that's understandable," blinked Kennedy, shaking her head.

"Oh, not the whole undead part.  Although, yeah, admittedly some 
wiggins there.  I meant that my senses are so heightened it's like 
I'm stoned or something.  Without the fogginess," added Willow.

"Well, sure, you know, vampire," said Kennedy, pointing at 
Willow.  "It must be intense, what with the better hearing and, and 
the sense of smell and the rest.  Whatever the rest is, I mean."

"You have no idea," replied Willow softly.  "The night, it...how can 
I describe it?  It's like it has texture, like I can taste it."

Kennedy just looked at her with a puzzled expression.

"Um..."

"Never mind," interrupted Willow, once again looking back over her 
shoulder at the graveyard behind them.  Again Kennedy tried to see 
what Willow was looking at but saw nothing unusual.

"There must be a fresh grave back there," said Willow, avoiding 
Kennedy's questioning eyes.

"Okay.  So...you're worried about a vampire rising?" offered Kennedy, 
lowering her arms.

"No.  I mean, hey, this newbie vamp should be able to handle another 
newbie vamp, so no, not a good thing, but worried?  Nah," said 
Willow, shaking her head.

"Oh.  Um, how did you know about the grave?  I didn't see..."

"I smelled it," answered Willow.

"You...huh?"

"The dirt.  I smelled it," repeated Willow, looking down and 
shuffling her feet.

"Okay.  Makes sense.  And...and I'm thinking that if you weren't a 
vamp right now you'd be...blushing?" suggested Kennedy.  Willow 
uncomfortably and slowly rolled her eyes.

"Did I mention the heightened senses thingy?" asked Willow, chewing 
on her lower lip.

Kennedy crossed her arms again.

"I follow the logic, but that still doesn't..."

"I like the smell," whispered Willow, only glancing at Kennedy.

"You...you what?"

"I like the smell," said Willow.  "I mean, really like it.  It's, um, 
well, kinda embarrassing, but...yeah.  I really like it," winced 
Willow.

"You find the aroma of freshly dug dirt...arousing?" laughed 
Kennedy.  Willow hesitated, then smiled.

"Among other things," nodded Willow.  Kennedy blinked.

"Such as?" smiled Kennedy in return.

"Like you haven't noticed me staring at your neck?" challenged 
Willow, any shyness gone from her tone now.  Kennedy hesitated but 
then grinned and stepped closer to Willow.

"Must be a freckle thing," whispered Kennedy, her face only inches 
from Willow's lips.

Willow firmly grabbed Kennedy by the shoulders and kissed her hard, 
forcing her close although Kennedy made no attempt to pull away.  
Willow ended the kiss as abruptly as she had stolen it.

"My lips are cold.  I have no breath.  Kissing a corpse...doesn't 
that bother you?" whispered Willow into Kennedy's ear.  Her mouth 
danced just above the pulse point on Kennedy's neck even though she 
was achingly aware of the cross dangling from the chain on Kennedy's 
chest.

Kennedy slowly raised her hand and touched Willow's cheek.  She was 
no longer smiling.

"Remind me to put a little dirt behind my ears the next time we go 
out for a walk," said Kennedy softly, adding a wink for emphasis.

Willow raised her eyebrows in response and laughed.

"You are trouble, aren't you?" grinned Willow.

"Been called worse," replied Kennedy proudly.

Willow glanced at the eastern horizon, then winked at Kennedy and 
walked away.  Absently touching her neck, feeling her racing 
heartbeat, Kennedy slowly exhaled and then followed Willow.

"Willow, why hasn't your face changed?" asked Kennedy when she caught 
up to her.

"It's all about control.  Control...and not letting go," added Willow 
thoughtfully.

"Oh.  You mean, like with the magic?"

"Yeah.  The magic.  And the kissing," smiled Willow.

"I was talking about the kissing," replied Kennedy, now walking ahead 
of Willow.  This time Willow didn't laugh.

*****

Kennedy was looking up at the rooftops, trying to get a feel of where 
they were in downtown Sunnydale when Willow grabbed her arm and 
forced her to stop.  Up ahead, leaning against the brick wall of some 
nameless building, stood a girl in torn and dirty clothes.  She was 
close enough to a streetlight for Kennedy to make out her features 
yet close enough to the darkness of the alley behind her to slip away 
if she needed to.  It was obvious that she was watching them even 
though she tried to appear uninterested.  The girl was about Dawn's 
age.

Kennedy reached into her jacket and slowly withdrew a stake but 
Willow shook her head.

"She's human," whispered Willow.

"How can you tell, especially from here?" asked Kennedy, not taking 
her eyes off the girl.

"I can hear her heartbeat," replied Willow nonchalantly.

"Oh," muttered Kennedy, looking at Willow out of the corner of her 
eye.

"And vampires aren't usually this frightened and nervous," added 
Willow, walking slowly towards the girl and smiling to relax her.  
Kennedy slipped the stake back inside her jacket and followed a few 
steps behind.

The girls eyes darted from Willow to Kennedy and back again.  She 
smiled but even Kennedy could sense her apprehension now.

"Hey.  See something you like?" challenged the girl, turning sideways 
as if presenting herself.  Willow's shoulders slumped slightly and 
she shook her head.

"Kinda late to be out working the streets, no?" said Willow.

"My choice.  What's it to you?" snapped the girl.

"Hey!  No one's judging you," barked Kennedy, softening her tone with 
a glance from Willow.  "It's just not safe out here at night, okay?"

"Really!" laughed the girl, rolling her eyes.

"Do you have a place to stay tonight?" asked Willow.

"I'm fine.  Besides, what do you care?"

"Maybe I don't," shrugged Willow.  The girl met Willow's stare but 
quickly looked away, pushing her stringy bangs away from her face 
with one hand.

"Look, you're not really interested in my life story.  The shelter 
was full tonight, okay?"

Willow just continued to look at the girl and she responded by 
wrapping her arms around herself, shivering even though the night was 
warm.

"You didn't answer my question," said the girl with more confidence 
now.

"What's your name?" asked Willow softly.  The girl looked down at her 
feet but quickly looked back up.

"Kathy," she answered shyly.  Willow believed it was her real name.

"Kathy, my friend is right.  This isn't a good place for you to be.  
Not at night," warned Willow.

"Look, you and your girlfriend interested or not?" sighed 
Kathy.  "Could have us some fun...for a price."

"She's not..." began Willow defensively.  Then she just frowned and 
shook her head.  "You know, we really aren't."

Willow turned and walked away, leaving Kennedy just standing there.  
The girl pulled a crumpled pack of cigarettes out of her back pocket, 
tossing it aside in disgust when she realized it was empty.  Kennedy 
ran to catch up with Willow and grabbed her arm.

"Hey, wait a minute, okay?"

"Why?" snapped Willow.  Kennedy glanced back at the girl and frowned 
at Willow.

"You're just going to leave her out here?" sighed Kennedy.

"Like we have any more room back at the house?" questioned Willow, 
crossing her arms.  Again Kennedy frowned, though this time at 
Willow's behavior.

"What are you so shocked about?  That Sunnydale has a soft white 
underbelly or that someone like her would do anything for money?" 
spat Willow.

Kennedy blinked.

"I don't see this as a matter of choice but one of need.  Willow, 
you...you're not acting like yourself."

"Wonder why?" answered Willow sarcastically.  Kennedy shook her head. 

"Look, I'll be right back, okay?" said Kennedy, not really seeking 
Willow's approval.  Willow reluctantly nodded, looking at a 
fingernail as if suddenly bored.  Kennedy walked back to the girl, 
fished a ten dollar bill out of her jeans pocket and handed it to her.

"What's this for?" asked Kathy warily.

"For you.  Buy yourself breakfast or something," shrugged Kennedy.

She looked at the bill and then looked up at Kennedy.

"Thanks," whispered Kathy, folding the bill into her hand.

"Yeah.  Just answer me one question."

"Okay," shrugged Kathy.

"What happened?  Why are you here?" asked Kennedy softly.

"That's two questions."

"Maybe.  Maybe not," smirked Kennedy.

"Fair enough.  I took off with my boyfriend.  Couple of weeks ago I 
was waiting in the car when he robbed a gas station.  Didn't even 
know he had a gun," shrugged Kathy.  "A few nights later, I woke up 
in this motel room, he was gone.  Just like that."

"Damn."

"Yeah," laughed Kathy, somewhat bitterly.

"Can't you go back home?" 

For the first time since they met Kathy looked sad, but her pained 
expression quickly vanished.  She just shook her head once.

"Kathy, call them.  You might be surprised..."

"Yeah," sighed Kathy, interrupting her.  Kennedy nodded and turned 
around.

Willow was gone.   

*****

Kennedy stumbled forward, not watching where she was going as she yet 
again glanced at the eastern horizon.  It was light out now and, 
shoulders slumping, she sighed, knowing she wouldn't find Willow 
now.  And knowing it wouldn't matter if she did.  She could only 
hope...no, Willow was fine.  Well, maybe not fine, but she was 
alive.  She knew that.  Deep down, she knew that.  So why did she 
have to keep reminding herself of that?

Looking around, Kennedy suddenly realized that this alley was 
familiar, that she knew where she was.  She had circled back almost 
to the place she had last seen Willow.  Something caught her eye, 
something that was out of place, there on the ground in the shadows.  
A body.  

Grateful that she wasn't lying in the sunlight, Kennedy ran towards 
the girl and instantly understood two things; this wasn't Willow and 
this girl was dead.  Kneeling down next to the body, she grabbed 
Kathy's shoulder and eased her onto her back.  Her head rolled to one 
side and the runaway's lifeless eyes stared back at her.  Cringing, 
Kennedy tried not to look at the two deep puncture wounds on her 
neck.  In her hand was a crumpled up ten dollar bill.

In her hand.

That could only mean that Kathy was killed moments after Kennedy had 
left her.  Kennedy closed her eyes and shook her head, refusing to 
believe that Willow might have done this.

END OF PART TWO






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Willow: "It's a good fight, Buffy, and I want in."
Buffy:  "I kinda love you."
                     'Choices'

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