REPOST Fic: Make It Stop...B/W, R

["cocoachanel67" <cocoachanel67@xxxxxxxxx>]

I have posted this here before, awhile back. Hope it's ok to repost. 
This is intense.

[Moderator note:  Reposts are fine, but should be labelled as such, so people don't spend time reading and then go "hey, didn't I read this before?"

Dan]

Make It Stop&story 1 in the series
Red: cocoachanel67@xxxxxxxxx
W/B  
Rated R- intense drama: deals with abuse.
Joss' folk.
Summary: Willow hurts, Buffy makes it stop.



    Buffy heard the crying the moment she stepped into the house. It 
took her mere seconds to reach the bedroom. She wasn't surprised when 
she found Willow, curled up in the corner, a knife in her hand. She 
quickly took her girl in. There didn't seem to be any blood, maybe 
she had gotten there in time.
    "Will?" she softly said, kneeling down next to her. "It's ok, 
sweetie, I'm here."
    Carefully, she removed the blade from the redhead's hand, 
putting it aside. Willow looked at her, eyes swollen from crying, 
lips trembling. Buffy had her arms around her in a heartbeat, pulling 
her close, whispering words of comfort to her.
    "I'm sorry I was gone so long, sweetie," she apologized, hating 
herself for even leaving in the first place.
    "No, you have to, I understand, it's your job," Willow murmured, 
her face in Buffy's shoulder.
    "You are more important, Will, so much more."
    She stood up, carefully scooping the redhead up in her arms and 
carrying her to the bed, keeping her in her arms as she sat down.
    "I'm so sorry, Buffy," she cried.
    "Sh, it's ok, honey, you don't need to apologize, you did 
nothing wrong."
    The Slayer let out a deep sigh of relief seeing that she had, 
indeed, gotten there in time. Her girlfriend was cut free.
This time.
    "I wanted to, Buffy, I really, really wanted to," Willow 
admitted, wiping her eyes and facing her.
    "But you didn't, Will, baby, you didn't."  Buffy reached up and 
wiped the remaining streaks of wet from her witch's eyes, smiling 
softly as she did. "You were strong, sweetheart, you fought it and 
won."
    Willow tried to look brave but failed miserably and the tears 
begin to fall again. It broke Buffy's heart to see her like this. If 
only she could do something to the bastard who had done this to her 
Willow. 
    She had been fighting monsters for nearly seven years, but she 
couldn't protect the woman she loved from the worst of all of them. 
Two months ago, during a routine patrol, a gang of vamps had nearly 
assaulted Willow. Buffy and Spike had gotten there just in time, but 
the incident had shaken the redhead up worse than Buffy had ever seen 
her. Then one night, a few days later, all hell had broken loose. 
Willow had woken up screaming bloody murder and when she was finally 
able to calm down enough to talk had confessed to the Slayer 
something that made Buffy sick to even think about. 
    The vamp attack had triggered a repressed memory of the witch. A 
memory of a sickening secret she had buried many years ago, the truth 
of a childhood horror. When she was a child, Willow had been raped by 
Xander's father.
    The details were somewhat sketchy, but the facts were there. It 
had occurred one night when she was staying over. He had been 
drinking, as usual and Xander and his mom had gone out to get some 
food. She had been playing in Xander's room, planning a surprise for 
him, a toy she had purchased with her own birthday money just for 
him. Mr. Harris had come in, started talking to her, then moved on to 
touching, and then- 
    Buffy really couldn't bear to think about it any more. The pain 
on Willow's face as she told of her memory was more than enough to 
break the Slayer's heart into a million pieces. And poor Xander, when 
he found out, he nearly killed the man. Had it not been for Spike, he 
would be sitting in jail right now. The vampire had literally drug 
him out of the house, back to his crypt where he kept him chained for 
a solid week. Of course, he had waited for the senior Harris one 
night after he left a bar and beat him within an inch of his life, 
stealing his wallet to make it look like a simple mugging. Dawn and 
her boyfriend, Andrew, had been with Xander when it happened, so he 
wouldn't be blamed. 
    It was when Xander found out, that he and Spike became the best 
of friends. It's funny what can bond people. Xander realized that the 
vamp had truly changed and was one of the good guys. Spike had found 
respect for the younger Harris, having seen what he had grown up with 
and how he had turned out. 
    "Buffy?"
    Willow's soft voice brought the Slayer out of her thoughts and 
she looked at the redhead.
    "Yes, honey?" she said, brushing strands of red from her face.
    "Please, make it stop."
    Buffy's heart fell. Ever since that night, Willow had taken to 
hurting herself. Dawn had found out first, having caught her in the 
bathroom with a razor to her arm, blood dripping to the tile floor. 
> From then on, they had all kept a close eye on their friend. Spike's 
girlfriend, Tara, a pretty blonde witch they all adored, had gotten 
Willow into counseling but had warned them, it would take some time.
    "Please, Buffy, I need it so bad."
     Buffy herself had woken up one morning, turned to her lover and 
found a beaten shadow of her Willow. A black eye and swollen lip 
decorated the beautiful face of the one she loved. She knew 
instantly, the wounds were from her own hands. She had been so upset, 
so horrified, she had woken the redhead, pulled her over her knee and 
began spanking her until her butt was as red as her hair. Willow, for 
her part, didn't even fight it. Instead, she just lay there, crying 
softly. When Buffy realized what she was doing, she stopped 
immediately, apologizing as she herself cried. But Willow had told 
her to keep going, said that it was cathartic in some way. Naturally, 
the Slayer had refused, but Willow begged her, told her that it 
helped. After all, she had said, would you rather see me bloody and 
bruised?
    After much discussion and great hesitation on Buffy's part, she 
had finally agreed. When Willow felt like she needed to hurt herself, 
she was to let Buffy know. Buffy would take care of it in a safe, non 
harmful way. The Slayer had talked to Tara and even Spike about it. 
Both agreed it was the healthier alternative.
    "Buffy?"
    Buffy looked into Willow's teary emerald eyes, they were 
desperate, needy, pain filled. How could she say no?
    "Ok, Will, it's ok. I'm going to take care of you, I promise."
    Willow managed a trace of a small smile then allowed Buffy to 
ease her over her lap. The moment she was face down across her 
Slayer's lap, Willow felt a sense of peace fall over her. Buffy 
smoothed a hand over her skirt, caressing tenderly.
    "On the bare, Buffy, please, I need it so bad."
    Willow's pleas brought tears to Buffy's hazel eyes and she 
raised the denim, resting it on Willow's back. She then slid the blue 
cotton panties down, baring the redhead's pale bottom.
    "It's ok, Buffy, it helps, it really does," Willow softly noted, 
reading her lover's thoughts. "I know you won't hurt me. I trust you. 
I love you."
    Buffy swallowed hard, the lump in her throat sticking. 
    "I love you, Will, and I will do whatever it takes to make you 
better, I promise."
    And with that promise, she raised her hand and brought it down 
on her girlfriend's behind.
    


    












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Willow: "It's a good fight, Buffy, and I want in."
Buffy:  "I kinda love you."
                     'Choices'

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