Fic: Totally Snowed (Repost: fixed talking heads)

[Silverna <silvernawolfe@xxxxxxxxx>]

Hi fellow shippers! Why the exclamation mark? Well
it's because it's actually Christmas day! And you
can't have a merry Christmas day without the merry
power of exclamation marks!

Here's the repost of Totally Snowed and I think all
confusion (over the talking head issue) is gone.
Here's hoping anyway. If any of you do pick up on what
is still a confusing line, please drop me a note so I
can fix the specific culpit. Thanks.


Totally Snowed
by Silverna
(silvernawolfe@xxxxxxxxx)

This is a Christmas themed romantic fic for the Wiffy
board (Version 2: minus talking heads). There will be
a New Year themed sequel: 'Resolutions: Evolution'.

DISCLAIMER: Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy own Buffy and
Co. Grizzle, Argh! 

RATING: PG13

SPOILERS: Set partway through Season 7. Willows back
from England. Spike is souled and crazy but not with
Buffy yet. The Potentials have arrived with Kennedy
showing interest in Willow but those two arent
together yet. B/W
* * *


Two girls walked down Sunnydale's main drag in the
snow. The lithe redhead was trying to catch snowflakes
on her tongue while singing (tunelessly) 'Favorite
Things' from Sound of Music. The small blond
accompanying was enthusiastically puffing air out,
trying to make as much 'cold steam' as possible.

"I love snow!" proclaimed Willow Rosenberg to the
world at large. A passerby gave her a strange look. 

Buffy just laughed. Yeah," the slayer said, "The last
time I played these crazy snow games was when Ang..."
and she petered off. 

Willow gave her a sideways glance. "Yes?" she said
encouragingly, praying that Buffy would open up and
talk to her. It hurt her deeply that after seven years
of best-friendship, said best friend was opening up
less and less. She'd agonized over their growing
distance on long and lonely nights spent sightlessly
watching TV without Tara curled up beside her (where
she was meant to be). All the agonizing had led her to
believe the reason for Buffy's distance must be one of
two conclusions. 

The first was that multiple world-savage along with
multiple deaths had taken their toll on Buffy. As a
defense mechanism she had closed herself off to the
pain that sharing would bring up. That was...bad, but
from Willow's viewpoint, bearable. Bearable because if
that was the case their friendship was salvageable;
indeed Willow even had a duty to help Buffy past it.
The second postulation (stuff of nightmares) was that
due to recent events Buffy simply didn't trust her.
That was much worse, mostly because there wasn't much
that she could do to rectify it if so.

So she held her breath. Buffy was looking down at her
fashionable boots as she trudged (yes trudged) along
and was now darting her own sidelong glance at Willow.
"It's no big deal." The slayer shrugged. "Just me and
Angel did this kinda thing once, one Christmas that
feels like a lifetime ago. This reminded me."

"Oh?" said Willow, scarcely able to believe her luck.
A real and honest-to-goodness revelation of Buffy's
inner workings! Small to be sure, but real and out
there between them.  To her it glowed with
implications of friendship growing strong again.

"Yep," said Buffy. "I was so happy back then. I really
believed..." She trailed off but Willow heard all the
unsaid words and understood the sudden twisting
despair on the slayer's face. After all, it was the
same expression that stared back at the witch in her
mirror on the bad days. 

Impulsively she reached out to grab Buffy's glove with
hers and said, "I know."

Looking over at her Buffy acknowledged, "You do." They
walked a little in silence. Willow held Buffy's hand
tightly. This was nice. Familiar togetherness. "I've
really missed you," Buffy told her out of the blue.
"Missed...us." She swung their hands a little to
emphasize her point. 

"Mmm hmm," agreed Willow. Inside she was doing
Xander's happy snoopy dance.

"Mocha?" suggested Buffy as they reached the cafe. 

"Yes please," said Willow. And they went in. They sat
at one of the high tables on high chairs and Buffy
swung on her seat while Willow dangled her legs back
and forth. She felt transported back through the years
to happier times. She saw from the lack of usual
tension on the slayer's face that Buffy felt the same.
It was nice. 

When the waitress brought the mochas and they'd taken
off their gloves to warm their hands up on them,
Willow piped up in her best jolly voice. "Merry
Christmas!" 

Buffy grinned back at her and jauntily proclaimed,
"Happy Hanukah!" 

Ah, thought Willow. Our old ritual. Will Buffy play
with me again? I miss us goofing around. She decided
to test and see. "I don't see what's so happy about
it," the witch  announced out loud.

"How can it not be happy? mock-griped Buffy. After
all you have no grinch. We of Christmas on the other
hand are the proud owners of both a grinch and a
scrooge." 

Willow giggled. 

Buffy glowed in response. It was nice to hear Willow
giggle. She hadn't heard that since Tara. Emboldened
she said, "God, I've missed your laughter." 

Willow sobered a little. "There hasn't been much to
laugh about, she explained. For ei...either of us."

"True," said Buffy.

"Yet tis the season of, uh, laughter," tried Willow,
with a tentative crook of her lips, indicating a joke
attempt.

"Joy to the world, uhuh, agreed Buffy.

"And maybe, just this once, joy to us?" Willow asked.
The pleading note in her voice made her wince a
little. 

But Buffy merely nodded. "Bring it on. I could do with
some joyin'." 

Willow's eyebrows arched. "That sounds dirty," she
commented. Not that she was complaining. 

Buffy looked sultry. "Maybe it is."

"Oh really? said Willow challengingly. Well, what
does it mean then?"

"Y'know." Buffy had started blushing big time. Its
uh, playing with your happy sti..."

Willow yelped an interruption. "Don't even say it!
Eugh, that's disgusting."

"To you maybe, said a smirking Buffy. Now that you
don't er, drive stick." She started making weird
noises in the back of her throat as she tried
(unsuccessfully) to choke back her laughter.

Willow pretended to be aghast. "I CAN'T believe you
just said that! Who died and made you Faith?"

Buffy winked. "I'd personally label it as
hanging-around-Xander-itis."

Willow threw up her hands and kept the rant going.
"Not to mention it's disgusting in general. Not just
to a...woman of the world such as myself."

Buffy looked amused. "Woman of the world?"

"East meets west and all that, Willow said huffily.
Two teams, batting for both..."

"Now I don't even know what you're talking about,
moaned the slayer. Your analogies are screwy."

Willow pouted. Then she thought of a comeback. "You
know what analogies are?"

"Hey! said Buffy. Don't insult the blond! It's
bottle remember?"

"I never would, lied the witch. You're smart in
lotsa other ways." That bit wasnt a lie.

Buffy folded her arms over her chest grumpily. "Now
you're just pacifying me."

Willow nodded sagely. By way of explanation she said,
"And thats a wise choice for me, Miss 'I punch
through walls with my fists of fury'."

Buffy rolled her eyes and without really thinking
said, "Oh I think you can probably take me, black-eyed
girl."

Uncomfortable silence reigned as their banter caught
up to them. Willow looked away from the charged
tension, thinking of being her dark self, of punching
Buffy into the bookshelves with ease and glee. She
felt a warm and slightly sticky (from the mocha)
slayer-hand settle lightly over hers and risked a
glance up.

"Bad thoughts? asked Buffy. I'm sorry, Will. My puns
are moldy and off."

"No, it's alright, said Willow, looking at their
hands. I was just...thinking about it, but not in a,
ah, necessarily bad way. I mean, it happened Buffy.
It's out there. Between us. Maybe we should, um, talk
about it?" 

Buffy sighed and looked down at Willow's hand now
slipping out nervously from under hers. "Do we have
to?" the slayer asked, and her voice was strained.

"No," said Willow, and that was true. But a heaviness
had settled over her with the memories, and now her
thoughts turned irresistibly towards the woman whose
violent death had lead to her own descent. Sweet
gentle Tara. Too innocent to die like that. Her
slightly unfocused eyes settled on Buffy. If she
squinted just right she could almost imagine...

"I hope you're not doing what I think you are," said
Buffy, and Willow roused right quick. 

"Um, said the witch, looking extremely guilty.

"Because it's not fair," said Buffy. She didn't sound
mad. Just sort of sad with a kind of forced amusement.
"I can't squint and see any of my ex-honeys in your
frame." 

Willow squeaked. 

Now Buffy grinned a real grin. "It's okay," she said.
And compassionately: "You miss her."

"So much," admitted the witch. And they sat silently
again. 'I guess playing's not gonna work after all,'
thought Willow. 'There's just too much...pain between
us now. I wish we could start again.'

Buffy was looking at her, ducking her own head to peer
into Willow's eyes. "Are you okay, Will?" she asked.
Her hand came up again, this time to cup Willow's cold
cheek in a gesture the witch loved. Willow remembered
clearly every one of the few times Buffy had used this
particular move over the years. In sufficiently boring
classes she'd reminisced about these tender touches,
listed them in chronological order and replayed them.
She couldn't help the sigh that gusted from her
suddenly parted lips. She couldn't help leaning into
the touch.

But Buffy's answering sigh was a surprise. Also
surprising was that the hand stayed and was now
brushing lightly over her skin in a kind of caress.
Willow held her breath...

And saw spots flash before her eyes as she forgot to
breathe for too long, and felt Buffy's hand now
un-gently tapping her face for attention. And gulped
in great gasps of air. And stared at Buffy's worried
face staring back at her, into changeable eyes (gray
in the dim light of ambience) that had so many
Willow-oriented expressions known and filed by the
witch but now...now were filled with something
indescribable because she'd never seen it in those
depths before. Leastways not directed at her.

"I just want to be happy again," Buffy told her
earnestly, and then the kicker. Buffy (her Buffy, her
reason for staying) was leaning in with a definite
'I'm going to kiss you now' expression and Willow was
frozen with panic (here comes the end of our
friendship!) and desire (I love that thing she does
with her lips) and good old-fashioned NEED. And Buffy
halted about two inches from her face and they stared
at each other for a timeless moment. 

As Willow watched (still frozen) Buffy's eyes grew
huge and deer-like and the slayer squeaked out, "I'm
gonna kiss you?" 

'Great,' thought inner-Willow with some serious
disgust. 'I don't even get the moment of ecstasy
before the moment of truth. This so isn't fair.' 

Out loud the witch managed to stammer out,
"R...really? W...when?"

"Uh," Buffy blinked. "That's okay with you? Right?"

"Mmm," said Willow affirmatively. Any minute now she
was going to go cross-eyed and fall off her chair from
all this too-close, eye-gazing intensity. Would it be
wrong to scream out YES! at the top of her lungs in
this very public place?

Buffy was fumbling for words. "'Cause I could, um,
stop. The slayer's lips betrayed her, twitching a
little in protest to that particular offer.

"No! cried Willow. 'Could this be going more badly?'
she wondered. Buffy still hadn't kissed her (which
would make everything all better she was sure) and
people were starting to ogle them. At least that's
what it looked like was happening out of the corner of
her eye, and she so wasn't going to turn and get a
better look. Turning would mean turning away from
Buffy, and what if the slayer read into it and thought
it indicated Willow-disgust, or Willow-fear, or
Willow-boredom, or Willow-suddenly-straight, or
Willow-not-desperate-to-lock-lips-with-her at the
first possible convenience? And she was going crazy
with desire and she couldn't seem to stop thinking at
a hundred miles per hour and how much time had passed
between what she'd just said and Buffy's lips now
opening to...to DARNIT say something else. Not to kiss
her. 

Um, okay, said Buffy, oblivious to the mental
Willow-babble, oblivious to the other coffee drinkers,
focused only on Willow-lips. Are you sure?

Yes! said Willow. She felt like she was drowning
here. Less talk, more kissing! Since when did Buffy
talk so much anyway? Wasnt she supposed to be the
red-hot passionate slayer of unbridled lust? No wait,
that was the Buffy of her fantasies&

Buffy was still scrabbling around for some kind of
confirmation that this was the right tack to take for
both of them. Weakly she offered, Are you sure that
youre sure?

Im sure that Im sure that Im so sure, said
Willow. Her voice was definitely dripping frustration.

Buffy licked her own lips. You have no, uh,
reservations?

Willow stared at the slayer's lips. Then at the
slayer. Why?" she asked. "Do you?

Buffy tripped over her words in her speed spitting
them out there. Um, well, well-youre-a-girl.

Willow nodded slowly. A gay girl, she said. Where
was this going?

Im straight, Buffy pointed out. She looked directly
at Willows bottom lip with hunger in her eyes then
quickly looked back into the steady green gaze.

Willow actually smirked a little. So far, was all
she said.

Buffy gasped. Opened her mouth and shut it again.
Repeated this. Then thought of another possible
objection. Youre my best friend.

Convince me, said Willow, and there might have been
a slight rumble in her voice that spoke of heat.

Buffy was having trouble breathing now, but pressed on
bravely regardless. She pulled out what had often been
the clincher in her own mind. We dont want to ruin
the friendship.

By making it better? said Willow. She rolled her
eyes.

Well, thought Buffy, that excuse is down the
toilet. But what about the even bigger one? She could
feel sweat dripping down the back of her neck.
Honestly and with a fair amount of self-derision she
managed to say, I screw up relationships.

Willow's expression morphed into an odd mix of 'what
next?!' and frank understanding. Youre only half the
equation, she pointed out. 

That's true, thought Buffy. 'God, I can't believe
I'm agreeing with her when she's dusting my logic.'
Out loud she asked again, Youre sure? 

Yes, said Willow. Desperate undertones.

Clear on what were doing? re-checked the slayer.

Crystal, grated Willow. Who wouldnt be by now?

Your breath smells nice, remarked Buffy, almost as
an afterthought.

Thank you, said Willow. And then more pointedly,
Staller.

Alright, alright, said Buffy. She closed her eyes
for a long moment and when she opened them they were
filled with ass-kicking, world-saving determination.
It was Buffy the Vampire Slayer who announced, Im
going in. Willow's eyes widened in response. And in
the slayer went.

First Buffy unconsciously re-licked her own lips. Then
she took a deep breath (which Willow felt due to
proximity) and leaned in with her head tilted to the
right. They bumped noggins gently and Buffy swore.
Then apologized. But she didnt back off for which
Willow was truly grateful. And then Buffy tried again.
She leaned in with her head tilted to the left,
tentatively placed her lips over Willows and kissed.
The slayers eyes drifted closed at this touch.

Soft, she thought. Willows lips were softer than a
boys. No distracting stubble. Soft warm dampness and
resisting pressure. A tingle. In the slayer's lips and
skittering down over her spine. Heading for the nether
regions. She squirmed a little and adjusted the
pressure, pushing in harder. Mmm. The sensation of
being kissed as Wills lips were brushing over hers.
Buffy heard the moan from the back of her throat with
some surprise (she didnt remember letting herself
make that sound). Tingles all over. Trust between
them. This kiss: familiar and yet the strangest thing
shed ever experienced. Feeling Willow whom shed felt
in so many ways in this oh-so-new way. Identifying her
within the kiss by her scent (strawberries and pine
overlaying human and girl), her vibe (leashed
thrumming magical energy), and her taste (creamy
mocha, aloe skin). Feeling young again. Like a gangly
teenager having her first serious kiss behind the
detention block. Hearing the eager whimper that was
her Willow. Feeling wanted. Important. Able to truly
influence anothers happiness. She smiled against
Willows lips.

And felt her best of friends smile back. They broke
off breathing heavily. 

That was... Buffy smiled again. Her cheeks ached
from the force of that smile.

Wow, agreed Willow. And you know, the witch
continued thoughtfully, brushing her fingers over her
own lips in wonder of the event, it wasnt even the
kiss.

Huh? said Buffy.

It was us, said Willow in the softest of voices. It
was because it was us.

Yknow, said Buffy slowly. I think youre right.

Good, said Willow. I am.

So, uh, what now? asked Buffy, jittery as shed ever
been. The energy was fairly rolling off her in
heat-waves.

Willow grinned her biggest smarmiest grin and said,
we do it again, with tongue.

Mmm, agreed Buffy. Then, I mean, no!
Waitaminute...we need to talk about the uh, ah
implications.

Again? Willow frowned. 

Well, we didnt really cover it the first time, said
Buffy. There were just so many things that could go
wrong here. She had to stop them upfront. 

Willow must have heard the rabid anxiety in the
slayer's voice because she leaned back and said,
Okay. If we have to.

Buffy ran a shaking hand through her hair. Okay. Now,
you know I love you. As a friend.

Willow panicked. She felt the horror bubbling up
inside with cold, stifling power and croaked out, Oh
please dear Goddess...

What? said Buffy, not understanding the panic but
seeing it there. Her hand grabbed Willow's arm in a
too-tight grip. What is it?

Willows hands were clutching painfully at the table.
Tightly she managed to get out, This. Is. Not.
Happening.

Buffy stared at her stupidly. Then realised what shed
previously said and what it sounded like and almost
slapped her own forehead. No! No! Im not doing the,
so lets just be friends' talk." She shook Willow
gently and saw the clouded eyes start to uncloud.
"Its okay! Really!" The slayer's hand smoothed down
Willow's arm in a comforting gesture that ended in her
capturing and stilling Willows trembling hands with
her own. She collected her thoughts with some
difficulty. Words weren't really her thing. Okay,"
Buffy managed. "I have it. I was saying that although
I love you like a friend there are lots of kinds of
love.

Willow waited. Her heart was thumping painfully
against her ribcage.

Friendship love, said Buffy, and family love, and
romantic love.

Willows intelligent brain kicked in and she
contributed, Also mother-to-child specific love.

Uh right, said Buffy. Which is not part of this
conversation.

Oh&oh yeah, mumbled the witch. Her hands fidgeted
within Buffy's. Sorry. Nervous here. Going out of my
mind.

Sorry, said Buffy, trying to sound reassuring. Its
not bad, I promise. Look, Will, youre my very best
friend...but youre more.

Willow broke out into a huge relieved smile. Thank
all the higher powers and make them many offerings!

Yes, said Buffy. And she went on trying to explain
the depth of her feelings. Youre like a sister to
me.

Willows smile was gone and her look of glassy shock
was back. Oh. My. Goddess.

No! cried Buffy. Her explaining was so suckful.
No, the slayer repeated, thats not a bad thing.
Gees, Im doing this like Im Anya before she was
human. Bear with me, Will. Listen, theres more uh,
love that I, er, love you with. I think I also have
feelings of the hearts and puppies kind.

Think? repeated Willow, trying to follow all this.
Hearts and puppies?

Well, I, er love you an awful lot? Buffy tried.

Awful, huh? said Willow. Look, Buffy, she decided,
finally regaining some of her composure, I think you
better let me help you out here, for both our sakes.

Buffy looked properly abashed. She also pouted a
little which Willow found immensely cute. Fire away
then," the slayer said. "I do need the assist. 

Willow smiled gently into Buffys eyes. I love you.
She said it with all the emotion of seven years of
hopeless waiting and thwarted desire. She said the
words like they were a frightened discovery by teenage
nerdy Willow (as they had been) and the oft-thought
reflection of mature and slightly-more-poised Willow.
She put her heart into her eyes and held tightly to
Buffys hands and let her bottom lip quiver freely
with all the suppressed longing flowing out from
inside of her. She watched as Buffy took all this in
and put her enhanced senses to work on it. She watched
Buffys eyes widen and darken with responsive emotion.

Oh. The slayers voice was husky.

Yes, said Willow simply, and lifted Buffys right
hand to press a fervent kiss against it. She held the
(quivering) hand to her lips and slowly, deliberately
looked at Buffy with a heavy-lidded, smoky gaze.
Merry Christmas, she purred. She didnt feel bad for
pulling out what Buffy had previously referred to as
her Willowy-Wiles. You only got one chance in life
at the really important things (so she had found) and
this was too important and too long coming to give
anything less too. It would either play out
stupendously well or hellishly badly and there was
nothing she could do but stop herself from blaming
herself later for a lack of trying. 

Buffy seemed to register this. Big guns, she
murmured looking dazed.

Cocked and ready, murmured back Willow, then snorted
with laughter. That sounded just so...wrong. She
lowered Buffys hand but didnt let go.

You love me, repeated Buffy, trying to still her
shaking hands held in Willows. Trying to gain some
semblance of control. Trying to calm her shaking
heart. Really, she felt like she was about to go into
cardiac arrest on the spot. And what would happen
then? Willow would give her mouth to mouth? Oh God.

Love, confirmed Willow. Like a rainbow. She
laughed again. This could be the prelude to a
breakdown. 

Wha... Buffy licked her dry lips and tried again.
What about Kennedy? 

Who? Willow was blithe. Then her eyes narrowed.
What about Angel?

Hes long gone, argued Buffy.

Yes, said Willow, But what if he came back?

Im taken, said Buffy. It was said so easily,
thoughtlessly. It rolled off her tongue and hung there
in the charged air currents between them, shiny and
new and inescapably there. They both pondered it. 

Until Buffy thought to ask, What about Oz? If he came
back?

Please, griped the witch, Hes the reason I turned
to girls. No wait, that technically not true. Youre
the reason.

I am? said Buffy feeling stunned. Wow." She felt
shy. Softly she got out, "I guess youre the reason I
turned too.

You mean it? said Willow. She had a strange look on
her face. Look, Buffy, are you telling me all these
years...you never noticed anything?

You mean you liked me for that long? Buffy was
wearing her best 'blond' expression. It looked a tad
too contrived.

Willow cast about for a good answer. Um. Maybe." She
paused. "Who wants to know?

Buffy grimaced. The Buffy that is traditionally blind
and stupid when it comes to Eros?

Willow was honestly surprised. You know who Eros is?

Well, I killed a demon who claimed, mistakenly I
hope, to be him, said Buffy, and he gave me a LOT of
boring back-story.

Oh. Willow thought about that. I didnt know, she
finally said. How come I didnt know that?

I uh, Buffy had the grace to look chagrined, 
Wasnt talking to you at the time.

Oh, said Willow. That really said it all, didnt it.
Oh thats...oh.

Im talking to you now, Buffy pointed out hopefully.

Your choice, accused Willow, feeling grumpier by the
second. Id rather be doing talking of a different
kind.

A pleading note entered Buffys voice. Youll thank
me for this when out relationship is strong and solid
like a rock.

Our relationship? said Willow. Thats such a
generic, easily-misinterpreted word. I mean, weve
always had a relationship per-se.

Okay, agreed Buffy. Our new...attachment.

That makes me sound like an appendage. Willow was
not in the mood to be gracious.

Whoops, said Buffy. Sorry. Didnt mean to um,
compare you to a lot of books. Uh...

Willow ignored the misunderstanding and re-asked
instead, You really didnt know?

Buffy looked incredibly uncomfortable. She actually
started shifting in place but under the boring green
gaze finally muttered, I may have known.

Willow was truly aghast. May have?

Do you believe in repressed noticings? Buffy was
desperate for some leeway.

Willows voice started climbing. Do you believe in
torture of innocents? How could you?!

Buffy raised both hands. Cmon Will," she pleaded.
"Lets not go there now. Not today. It leads nowhere
good. And I cast my vote for some good to come out of
this conversation.

With an effort Willow calmed her breathing. Valid
point. She managed to make herself nod. Agreed," she
sighed. "This talk helps exactly zero in getting our
repressed and raging sexual tension off the table and
onto the floor where it belongs.

A tentative grin from the slayer. So what do you
suggest?

Willow looked excited. We go somewhere more private
than cafe central and make out.

Buffy gnawed on her bottom lip as sudden fear of the
unknown filled her with tension. What?" she squeaked
out. "Leading to what exactly? Wild monkey love?"

No!" said Willow, although she was disappointed by
Buffy's reaction. She did remember though the whole
world of fear she'd gone through in trying to allow
herself to like and be liked by Tara. Maybe she should
do the understanding thing. Plus, sleeping with Buffy?
So soon after kissing Buffy? Could anyone say cardiac
arrest?! Out loud she said, "No 'cause uh, that would
be...skanky. Weve barely even started...doing
whatever the heck it is you wont admit to us doing.
Nobody sleeps together until at least the third date.
Nobody who isnt Cordelia that is. Or Faith. Or Spike.
I refuse to be skanky. You havent even brought me a
mocha yet. Oh no! Did you sleep with skanky Spike on
the first date? Did you even date? And what about
Spike?

Buffy was smiling at her fondly. Willow reflected on
how it was lucky that the slayer seemed to find
Willow-babble endearing, and not just plain annoying.
Willow had first noticed this during their first year
of friendship, courtesy of her
explaining-our-homework-to-Buffy babbles. She had used
this knowledge to feel better after also noticing that
Buffy's understanding was possibly going down instead
of up. The witch tuned back in to hear Buffy say
gently, This is getting hard to follow, Will. As for
Spike, hes insane. Literally.

Willow looked upset. But he's still disconcertingly
sexy and raring to go bump in the night.

Buffy tried some gallows humor. Im less desperate
than I was.

Willow's poutiness increased. She honestly felt
insecure about this. Because you have Ol Reliable,"
she said, "Desperate Rosenberg hanging all over your
every...

Willow. Buffy cut her off with the well-timed word,
said with slayer-authority. And while the witch paused
there, hanging on the threshold of another nervous
babble, Buffy leaned in and delicately kissed her
nose. Youre so cute, the slayer said by way of
explanation. And Spikes nothing to me. A bad
decision at a bad time. I mean, I do care about him in
a way, and I do want to help him now he has his soul.
But hey, hes not my Will. 

Although, said Willow, unable to stop herself, He
does happen to be named William, which Will is short
for, a factoid that I find disturbing and mmph.

This time shed been stopped by a gentle kiss on the
lips - silk brushing across gossamer. Hmm. She could
see a pattern emerging. A pattern she could take
advantage of!

This, Buffy told her quite seriously when she opened
her eyes again, Is the best Christmas slash Hanukah I
have ever been alive for. I am holding you solely
responsible.

Okey-doke. Willow knew she was smiling goofily. She
was also considering initiating a game of footsy with
Buffy under the table. Happy day indeed!

We've got lots to talk about, went on the slayer in
that voice she usually reserved for commanding
speeches. Miles to go before we sleep and all that.
Unconsciously she paused to leer and Willow reddened
feeling a hot flush spread up the back of her neck.
She knew she should object to being leered at but
Buffy didnt even know shed done it (or shed be
stop-sign red too) and besides, it went a ways to
assuaging the insecurity of Does Buffy truly want me?
Am I leer-worthy?

I want you to know... said Buffy, then paused again,
this time mischievously. Willow leaned forward
expectantly. The slayer smiled at her. I kinda love
you.

Oh you do, huh? said Willow, and promptly launched a
tickle fight. This caused unprepared-Buffy to fall off
her chair and land on her butt with a crash. That sent
the waitress running over and Willow apologizing
profusely to both of them. People were definitely
ogling them now. No doubt about it. With a muttered
and extremely weak  explanation Buffy grabbed Willows
hand and dragged her out of the cafe. 

Youre alright, right? asked Willow for the third
time as they walked back up the main drag, without any
decrease in her anxiety level. You didnt uh, bruise
your tailbone?

Nope, my slayer-self has saved me, intoned Buffy
gravely. Thank God for super powers and a hot body.

Im thankful," said Willow lasciviously. Oh this was
fun! Naughty humor! Out loud instead of inside! She
checked one more time, "Youre sure youre unbruised?

Yep, said Buffy.

Good," said the witch firmly. "So that means its
totally fair when I do this... And she re-launched
herself at the hapless slayer to send them both
rolling through the snow, tickling non-stop and
laughing madly. A passerby gave them a strange look. A
second passerby grinned at them. They ended up
(courtesy of slayer speed and strength) with Buffy
holding Willow down in a drift, conveniently using
most of her body to do so.

You know, the slayer said, with tenderness once
again both old and new to Willow, All of this...this
day, what youve said, what youve shown me...you...

Tell me, whispered Willow.

Buffy swallowed and looked into trusting green eyes.
Im totally snowed, she admitted.

Willow grinned. Me too." Inside she mused, 'Who'd
have thought that Buffy would de-repress and be the
initiator? Not me. No-ho! Never in a million years.'
She looked with great pleasure into Buffy's changeable
eyes, pale blue in this particular light. It was nice
to be able to look as long as she liked and catalogue
details and not have to pretend she spotted an
eyelash. She felt a tease coming on. "I'm more than
snowed. Im under an avalanche.

Buffy looked mock-concerned. Are you freezing to
death and you need me to save you with my superior
body heat and ah, body-heating techniques?

Willow fluttered her lashes. Of course.

Buffy smirked down at her. Willow was so beautiful
and...and pliable lying in the snow beneath her. And
the slayer was so happy, so over-the-moon with
ecstatic joy that she was finding it hard not to whoop
and holler and twirl down the street like a little
girl. She looked into Willow's eyes with deep
gratitude. Thank you.

Willow was buoyant. Youre welcome, lil Missy! Um,
for what?

Buffy remained uncharacteristically serious. Being
you," she said. "Giving me you. This. An actual happy
holiday.

Willow's eyes were soft as she joked, Any time, lil
Missy." She laughed a little from sheer happiness.
Then she thought of something important. "Hey Buffy?

The slayer put all her weight onto her left arm in a
teasing display of strength and used her right thumb
to tenderly brush over Willow's eyebrow. Yeah? 

Willow's eyes were half-closed in pleasure as she
sighed the old familiar words out. I kinda love you
too.

Buffys whole body thrummed with warmth. She continued
to lightly brush red hair away from the beloved face. 

Yknow, Will," she said reflectively, "I think Im
ready for tongue.


THE END 
(but the beginning of B/W!)
































		
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Willow: "It's a good fight, Buffy, and I want in."
Buffy:  "I kinda love you."
                     'Choices'

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