DISCLAIMER: The characters and show all belong to Joss Whedon, Fox, Mutant Enemy, Kuzui, and God only knows who else. This particular arrangement of words in cyberspace belongs to me, however. Btw, it contains love between two women, so if such things offend you, are illegal where you live or somesuch, kindly don't read it and upset yourself, 'kay. It'll just make life easier on all of us.
Part One - The First Night
"THE DART GUN!!" Buffy Summers screamed as she tried desperately to hold
onto the creature hell bent on killing them all. "GET THE DART GUN!!" Her arms
were wrapped around the thing's corded neck, one leg hooked around its midsection, while
her other leg was locked around one of the metal bars behind her that had held the beast
safely locked away until only moments before.
Xander Harris leapt after the weapon as it went skittering across the dusty floor of the
crypt, scrambling to move as fast as possible and still evade the slashing teeth and claws
of the slavering creature bent on eating him at the first possible opportunity.
Giles lay several paces away, badly winded and bleeding from a cut to his forehead where
he'd collided with a sharp edge of marble after being hurled across the room by the
escaped creature, and before losing his grip on the gun Xander was trying so desperately
to retrieve.
Just another fun full moon in Sunnydale California, home of the Hellmouth, where vampires,
demons, and werewolves go to party.
Her nose pressed into the russet pelt of the werewolf, Buffy grunted as supernaturally
strong muscles knotted with the effort to hold it back from her friends.
"HURRY!!" she howled over the creature's roars, all too aware that the leg
tangled in the bars was threatening to give way. "I CAN'T HOLD ON MUCH LONGER!"
A huge clawed hand swatted the air between Xander and the gun, forcing him to yank his arm
back to avoid losing it. And then, apparently sensing that only Buffy's continued hold was
keeping it from its prey, the wolf changed tactics, rearing backwards to slam the Slayer
into the bars at her back.
Buffy heard her own cry of agony as she was hammered between unbending metal and inhuman
muscle, but somehow held on, gripping fur and muscle more tightly than she would have
sworn was possible. The thing lunged forward and reared back again, and Buffy couldn't
help but wonder if that popping noise she heard was the sound of her own bones shattering
under the impact. She held on tightly, face buried in fur, intensely aware of the flex and
play of powerful muscles under her desperately clutching hands. A roar rang across the
night as the thing expressed its rage.
And then she felt the thing slump and a beat later, she hit the floor, one leg still
tangled with the bars, the other unsteadily braced on the dusty stone tiles, the werewolf
a sudden deadweight in her arms. The Slayer's chin lifted, her eyes meeting Xander's dark
gaze just as he slowly lowered the dart gun, his face hazy behind the smoke drifting up
from the barrel of the weapon. The creature's backwards momentum into the Slayer had given
him the chance he needed to get his hands on the rifle.
"Buffy?" the teen gasped uncertainly.
"I'm all right," she assured him, though every muscle in her body was throbbing
from the pounding the creature had delivered. She untangled her leg from the bars, felt
her knee threaten to give way, and balanced herself on her other leg as she tried to
decide what to do next.. "Mostly." Despite the pain, she tightened her hold on
the creature in her arms, her gentle handling at odds with the fight that had raged only
seconds before.
Holding his ribs tightly, Giles pushed to unsteady feet. "Are you certain?" he
demanded as he straightened his glasses and peered at her intently. "If there's even
a small wound...." He trailed off suggestively. They all knew quite well what even a
small injury could do. He didn't need to remind them. After all, it was a small child's
playful nip that had reduced one of their number to the mindlessly raging creature hanging
limp in Buffy's arms.
"Nothing," the Slayer assured him. "Well, no blood drawn anyway...though
I'd pay money to have a whole new set of bones at the moment." She carefully settled
her foot on the floor, trying to decide whether to trust the knee or not. "I'm not
sure the knee bone's still connected to the thigh bone." Finally, she concluded it
wasn't going to fold under her--though it hurt like hell--and put her weight on the badly
torqued joint as she hefted the unconscious werewolf over one shoulder and hauled it back
inside the cage.
"I...uh...we can use the manacles to secure the cage for the rest of the night,"
Giles stammered as he eyed the broken lock on the crypt cage door. "And then worry
about something more permanent tomorrow."
Buffy settled the creature on the floor as gently as she could, then backed up a pace,
peering down at the raw bulk of fur and muscle that had, until a few hours before, been a
friend. She sighed softly, wondering if she'd ever get used to the transformation. She
glanced back, noting the stripped lock. The metal was torn and shredded. The creature had
been in an unusual furor tonight, one that had nearly led to disaster for everyone. Still
limping, she slowly turned and exited the cage, tugging the bars into place, then helping
Xander wrap the chains on the manacles around the bars to secure the door, before locking
it all together. When they were finished, she turned her gaze to Giles, where he still
leaned against a sarcophagus, a handkerchief pressed to the bloody wound on his forehead.
"That should be treated," she pointed out with a nod.
Giles lifted a brow, then winced as it pulled on the gash. "Yes, I'd rather gathered
as much," he allowed dryly. Now that things had calmed down, his innate British
demeanor was back in play.
"Xander, get him to an emergency room," Buffy instructed, sounding tired. She
leaned against a freestanding sarcophagus, slowly stretching her aching muscles.
"Are you sure?" her friend question. "I mean if that door doesn't
hold...."
Buffy retrieved the weapon from where he'd laid it, cradling it in one arm as she calmly
checked to make sure there was a second dart in the chamber. "It will," she
assured him without looking up. "I won't let it get to the point where it's about to
give way." Her words held an implied chastening that Xander couldn't miss and he
flushed.
"I just thought...you know...that all the growling was business as usual," he
said defensively.
A pale brow lifted as the Slayer eyed her friend. Inside the cage, the beast let out a
sleepy, woofling growl. "Yeah, I suppose that's understandable," she sighed as
she looked back at it with sad eyes. The creature was always in a frenzy of some kind, but
it seemed as though it was getting more intense each time, which worried the Slayer. What
if it just kept getting worse? Containing the beast was already hard enough. They'd have a
real problem on their hands if it got much more intense. "Just be more careful next
time, okay?"
"Oh, yeah...hey, that's me, Mister Careful Guy," Xander insisted with forced
cheer.
Buffy and Giles both looked at him with lifted brows.
"Right," Giles sounded doubtful as he continued daubing at the blood sliding
down his face in crimson ribbons.
"And now, you need to be Mister Get Giles to the Doctor Guy," Buffy reminded
Xander with a pointed look at Giles.
"It can wait--" Giles started to argue, but Buffy cut him off.
"No, it can't," she disagreed, noting the way the injury was still bleeding.
"The last thing we need is to have you dropping dead from blood loss."
"Buffy--" her former Watcher was still intent on arguing, but once again she cut
him off impatiently.
"Go!"
Giles wavered on his feet and Xander caught his elbow, steadying him as he questioned,
"Do you want me to stop by the library and--"
"No," Buffy inserted before he'd finished, then continued in a quieter voice.
"There's no need to interrupt the research binge. Besides, I promised Willow I'd
make sure everything was okay." She ran a hand through her disarrayed hair,
resettling it to some semblance of order. "It'll be all right," she reassured
Xander. After a few more limp arguments, Giles finally allowed himself to be helped back
to his car. Buffy stepped out into the chill night air, watching protectively as her
friend's made their way through the cemetery in search of the Watcher's aging Citroen.
When she heard the sound of the engine chugging away into the night, she tipped her head
up, focusing on the moon hanging brightly in the sky overhead. A thin halo of high cirrus
clouds gleamed around the shining globe, diffusing the textures, and making the man in
moon appear to laugh and wink at her. It was ironic that something so beautiful could
bring so much havoc to the world far below. "And the wolf jumped over the moon,"
the Slayer sighed tiredly, then turned to go back inside and take her place in silent
vigil.
* * * * * *
The full moon still hung poised in the sky, warring with the rising
sun and its warm light as night gave way to day.
Inside the crypt that doubled as an otherworldly prison, Buffy Summers slowly moved closer
to the bars barricading the beast from the world. She'd rehung the blankets used to offer
some measure of privacy to the human occupant soon to reappear, but she could see what was
happening cast on the blankets like some strange shadow play and hear the creak and grown
of bone and muscle changing shape. She felt the fine hairs at the nape of her neck stand
on end as the awful sounds filled the air, making her want to curl up in a ball and press
her hands to her ears in denial. She'd sat on this strange vigil more than once, but it
never failed to horrify her and she suspected it never would.
Finally, long, agonizing minutes later, the transformation was over, leaving the now human
occupant of the cage lying sprawled on the cold marble floor, limp in the unnatural sleep
that always seemed to follow the change.
Silently, the Slayer crept closer, wrapping her hands around cool steel bars to support
herself, when she realized how hard she was trembling. Thank God, Giles and Xander weren't
there to see the brave Slayer reduced to quaking in horror. It wouldn't have made for a
confidence building moment. Careful not to make any noise, she leaned to one side to peer
around the makeshift barricade, taking in the figure lying limp in the dust, pale limbs
splayed in an uncomfortable looking position, red hair tousled and askew.
A fine-boned hand lay near the bars and Buffy caught sight of a tiny twitch that told her
consciousness was returning.
"Will?" she whispered after a beat.
Green eyes blinked muzzily open. "Buffy?" Willow Rosenberg groaned weakly as she
slowly pushed up on one hand. She ran her fingers through her hair, shaking off some of
the dust. A headache was pulsing just behind her eyes, reminding her of the hangover from
hell...literally.
"You okay?" the Slayer questioned gently, her voice little more than a whisper.
Willow nodded slowly, trying to ignore the still unfamiliar embarrassment of waking up
naked in a strange place with people looking on and no real memory of what might have
passed while she was a beast.
Buffy leaned back so her friend wouldn't know she'd looked around the edge of the
blankets. "It's okay," she assured Willow. "Giles and Xander are both
gone." She picked up the neatly piled stack of Willow's clothes and handed them
through the bars without looking, then sat, quietly listening to the soft rustling of
fabric as her friend prepared to rejoin the proper mortal world. She was still sitting
there like that when she heard Willow's soft gasp.
"Oh, God," the hacker groaned. "The door...the lock's broken...."
Buffy pushed to her feet in an instant, wincing as her knee and ribs both reminded her of
the brutal pounding she'd taken the night before.
"I got out," Willow whispered in a voice thick with terror.
Buffy fumbled with the keys to the padlocked manacles, rattling the chains in her urgency
to unlock them. "It's okay, Will," she tried to reassure her friend. "You
didn't hurt anyone."
But Willow saw the way Buffy was limping and her brows drew together in a panicked frown.
"I hurt you," she gasped and backed up a step.
"No," Buffy insisted as she finally tore the chains away and yanked the door
open. "I'm okay. A little bruised. That's all." She caught Willow's cold hands
in her own, not letting the hacker escape.
Green eyes searched the Slayer's pale gaze, then slid down, moving over her battered
frame, hunting for any sign of a bloodletting.
"It's okay," Buffy assured her. "Really...you didn't hurt anyone."
"Sometimes I'm so scared that...." Willow couldn't even finish the thought.
"I know," Buffy sighed and tugged the hacker into a hard hug, offering what
little comfort she could. They'd been going through this monthly routine for four months
now, and Buffy could see the toll it was taking. She wished she could just hold Willow and
protect her from the harsh reality of what had happened, but not even the Slayer could
undo what had been done. She petted silky crimson hair, stroking tenderly, gently stroking
delicate strands back from Willow's temple. "We'll find a way to undo this," she
whispered near her friend's ear. "I don't know how, but we will."
Willow pulled back just far enough to peer into Buffy's eyes, losing herself in their
limitless depths. "Do you really believe that?"
The Slayer lifted a hand to stroke Willow's cheek lightly. Her mouth worked soundlessly
for brief moment, but she couldn't quite force the lie out. "I don't know," she
admitted at last. "But we'll get through...somehow we'll get through it
together."
The two girls stared at one another for a long moment. "When you say it, I almost
believe it," Willow breathed at last.
"Hey," Buffy whispered with an encouraging, if watery smile. "Slayer knows
best."
Willow looked down, suddenly realizing that her palms were resting on Buffy's upper chest.
She could smell the soft perfume of her friend's body, sense the heat pouring off of her,
see the flickering reflections of the room in her eyes, hear the quick pattern of her
breathing. As much as she hated the curse that had been laid on her shoulders, she had to
admit that it had altered her view of the world; made her more aware of scents, sounds,
almost everything. Even her nerve endings seemed to be more sensitive, making her
intensely aware of the texture of Buffy's sweater and heat of her skin through the thick
knit. She could feel the wolf inside of her, or maybe it was just a part of herself she'd
never before admitted to, a hidden Willow that she'd always carefully kept locked away
from the real world. Whatever it was, it was becoming steadily more aware of the Slayer,
and of the desires she'd hidden from herself since first meeting Buffy. She could feel her
heart thudding powerfully in her chest, the blood moving in her veins, taste the faint
musk of a woman's body--
"Will?" Buffy's voice was uncertain, drawing the hacker's gaze up until their
eyes met again. The Slayer tensed, startled by the heavy lidded look in her friend's eyes,
and felt her pulse accelerate. And then, suddenly, Willow blinked and it was gone. She was
the Willow Buffy knew and... The Slayer backed off from that thought, wondering at her own
sanity at the things that were suddenly running through her head. Willow was her friend.
Her very female friend. They were just friends. "Friends," she repeated, only
realizing she'd spoken aloud when Willow looked at her oddly. "I...uh...I
mean...we're friends...We'll be there for each other," she added quietly.
"For each other," Willow echoed. Again, they both fell silent, both aware of
each other in a way that was somehow both comforting and uncomfortable at the same time.
Willow lifted a hand to brush a few strands of blond hair off the Slayer's forehead,
instinctively leaning closer, lips parting ever so slightly. Her hands slid up, spreading
against the Slayer's upper chest. "We're more than friends, Buffy," she
whispered. It wasn't just the wolf that wanted to be with the Slayer--it was the girl as
well. "A lot more, I think."
Caught by intelligent green eyes just as surely as a rabbit caught in sharp canines, the
Slayer couldn't move. She nodded slowly. "A lot more," she admitted to herself
as much as to her friend as she leaned toward her.
They were going to kiss, fully intended to explore the sweet caress they both wanted, and
were about to touch lips when the sound of footsteps on the stairs leading into the crypt
brought both their heads up and around.
"Hey there," Xander said cheerfully as he bounded into the room. "It's your
fave guys come to take you out to breakfast for some post werewolf caloric recharge."
Oz entered a couple of paces behind the taller boy, his expression bland in the extreme.
"Hi."
Willow winced at the reminder, then flashed a glance at her ex-boyfriend. Somewhere along
the way, Xander had decided it was his job to get them back together--she supposed he
still felt guilty for their previous breakup--and he wasn't giving up no matter how many
times she begged him to.
"Xander," Buffy growled and glared at him for his insensitivity. He never
noticed.
"I don't think so," Willow demurred and yawned to emphasize her refusal.
"I'm dead tired. I really need to get some sleep."
Xander's shoulders slumped as he realized he'd failed yet again, while Oz simply stood
there, hands thrust in his pockets, hair and clothes rumpled from his night in the
library. "I found a few things last night that might help," Willow's ex
murmured, so deadpan that anyone who didn't know him would never have guessed at the depth
of his guilt for what had happened to his former girlfriend. After all, it was his cousin
that had bit her, and she'd been babysitting in his place so he could make a gig. "I
can drop them off after rehearsal this afternoon."
"Thanks," Willow said softly. She turned a look toward Buffy, suddenly intensely
uncertain about what had nearly happened. She didn't know whether she was the one who'd
wanted the Slayer, or whether it was the wolf, with its need to conquer, that had burned
for her. "I...I need to get some sleep," she repeated unsteadily, suddenly
desperate to get out of this place and into the sunlight.
"I'll walk you back to the dorm," Buffy inserted instantly and reached for
Willow's arm, but the hacker waved her off. Willow just wanted to be alone.
"No...you should get those books to Giles." Willow felt her friend's confusion,
could even smell it, and it just made her want to be away from her--all of them
actually--even more. It was pure sensory overload and she needed to escape its cause for a
little while to regain her equilibrium. "Maybe he can find something." She
danced back a nervous step. "I...I really need to get back now."
"Will, are you sure?" Buffy questioned worriedly, tamping down the hurt Willow's
unexpected rejection had caused. "I'm sure Xander can take the books over now."
She caught Willow's hands in her own, pulling her up short. "I'm not sure you should
be alone right now."
"Sure, no problem. Give me books to carry and I shall carry," Xander assured
them until Buffy flashed a glare his way to shut him up.
"Xander, shut up," Oz said softly, his eyes firmly fixed on his ex-girlfriend
and the Slayer.
Xander snapped his mouth shut, startled by the uncharacteristically firm words from the
guitarist.
With eyes only for Buffy, Willow stiffly shook her head. "I need to be alone for a
little while," she said raggedly. She carefully pulled her hands free. "I'm
sorry," she added as she backed away toward the door. "I just...I can't think
straight right now." And then she hurried out, leaving her friends behind her.
"Is it just me, or is she a little on edge these days?" Xander murmured
thoughtfully.
Buffy turned an annoyed gaze his way. "Hmmm, three days a month she turns into a
giant, hairy, killing thing. Think maybe that bothers her?"
Oz didn't say a thing.
Xander backed up a step. "I didn't mean anything...I mean, I just meant--" He
stumbled over his words, once again regretting his tendency to speak without thinking.
"Just don't," Buffy cut him off and held out a hand to Oz. "I'm headed
Giles' way anyway."
The guitarist handed Buffy the backpack that had been hooked over one shoulder without
comment.
"Thanks," the Slayer clipped as she slung the pack on. She looked back over her
shoulder, nodding toward the cage door where it hung somewhat precariously, the manacles
that had temporarily been used to lock it shut hanging through the bars. "We had a
bit of an accident last night--"
Oz nodded. "Xander told me."
"Think you could arrange to get that fixed?" She just wanted to get the books to
Giles and see how he was feeling. She didn't have time to worry about everything.
Xander nodded. "There's a guy that did some bodywork on my van. He's cool. I can get
him to do the welding."
"Thanks," Buffy muttered, her mind already somewhere else. "I'll see you
two later," she added as she hurried out.
"Well, that was certainly less than the fun bonding time I was hoping for,"
Xander complained unhappily.
"Xander, shut up," Oz repeated his earlier remark, his tone flat.
Xander looked down at the guitarist. "I'd think you'd be nicer about it all, since
it's your social life I'm trying to fix."
"No," Oz disagreed mildly. "It's your conscience...and it's not
helping."
Xander was still exhaling "Oh," when Oz hurried out.
Part Two
Buffy stared at Giles as he continued reading through the bookmarked
pages in the latest book from the stack she'd delivered for Oz. The gash on his forehead
had been cleaned in the emergency room, the edges of the wound neatly butterfly taped
backed together, then a large bandage slapped over the top. His face was bruised and he
looked like hell, but, like her, he was doing what he had to. "Anything?" she
prompted.
Giles sighed heavily as he looked up, his expression annoyed. "No...just like there
wasn't anything the last time you asked...two minutes ago."
"Sorry," the teen apologized, then wrapped her arms around her folded legs,
resting her chin on her upthrust knees. "I'm just worried."
Giles' sigh was softer this time. "I know," he admitted. " You're not the
only one, you know. Willow's very important to all of us."
"I know," Buffy exhaled. "It's just that...it's like it's getting worse
each time...I'm afraid for her, Giles...what if it means that...that somehow she's losing
herself...that the wolf's taking over?"
"Buffy," her Watcher began carefully, "whatever's happening, we'll find a
way to help her."
The Slayer exhaled heavily and reached for the top book on the stack that Giles had
discarded and flipped it open in hopes of perhaps finding something he'd overlooked.
"I may have something here," Giles said a little over an hour later.
Buffy bounced up from the couch, tossing her own book aside in her eagerness to see what
he'd found. "What is it?" She peered over his shoulder at the densely printed
page.
Giles frowned as he studied the passages in question. "Well, according to this, there
is one thing that can send werewolves into an unusually violent frenzy..." he
explained haltingly, rereading even as he spoke.
"What?" Buffy demanded impatiently, trying to read over his shoulder without
much luck.
An eyebrow climbed high on the Watcher's forehead. "Well...to put it bluntly..."
He paused, then took a deep breath as though nerving himself up for something.
"Frustration."
"Okay, that makes sense," Buffy agreed. "The werewolf doesn't like being
locked in a cage...that's definitely frustrating for it--"
"Not that sort of frustration," Giles interrupted her.
Buffy blinked, not understanding what he was trying to tell her. "I don't...what do
you mean?"
Giles pointed to a paragraph as he held the book up so she could see.
The Slayer leaned forward, silently reading what he was pointing at and then her brows
lifted. "Oh," she exhaled.
"It does explain why it's gotten steadily worse since she broke up with Oz,"
Giles noted, trying to keep his voice cool, disinterested and completely professional. He
mostly even managed to keep the nausea out of his tone. There were some things he would
have preferred not to know. "I am assuming they were intimate."
Buffy nodded slowly. "They were intimate," she confirmed, her mind whirling.
"So, what do we do?"
Giles lowered the book back to the table and began thumbing through it again. "I'm
not really certain. Apparently the sexual frustration plays havoc with the beast's
hormone's--particularly the adrenaline levels--and it sends it into a violent rage...I
mean, more violent than normal."
"So, I guess that means she should get back together with Oz?" Buffy whispered
past the sudden tightness in her throat, startled by how much the idea hurt.
"Not necessarily..." Giles disagreed. "According to this..." he
trailed off as he continued reading. "It has to be someone who puts the beast at
peace...reaches the person inside...since Willow and Oz broke up...perhaps he's
not..." He dragged a hand through his hair in frustration. "Damn books...half
science and half wive's tales." He snapped it shut. "The only thing it's quite
clear about is that the rage will just keep getting worse...and it will start to spill
into her everyday life."
"The wolf," Buffy breathed, remembering the look she'd glimpsed in her friend's
eyes that morning. "Sometimes I see it in her eyes."
Giles nodded. "Yes," he exhaled.
Buffy turned away, grabbing for her jacket, her expression distant.
"Buffy, what are you--"
"To talk to Oz," she clipped as she hurried out. "They broke up because of
this thing. He may be the only one who can reach her."
"Buffy, I'm not certain..." Giles started to argue, but she was already
gone."That that will help," he finished out of habit, then sighed softly and
continued reading.
* * * * * *
Willow Rosenberg was dreaming, her breath coming in quick pants, her
skin damp with sweat. She twisted in her sheets, until they were wrapped around her legs
and torso like a the manacles that they sometimes used to bind the beast that lived inside
her body. As she tossed and turned, tiny sounds vibrated up from her chest, while her
dream-self pursued its prey.
She was moving swiftly, her body graceful, controlled, and incredibly powerful. Her
prey's scent teased her nostrils; sweet, sensual, warm, making the dream-beast-Willow
hungry to make the catch.
She saw a flash of blond hair ahead of her and increased her speed. And then suddenly,
they broke through the thick undergrowth into a grassy clearing. Overhead, the full moon
gleamed brightly, casting sharp white light down onto the world below and throwing the
entire scene into sharp relief. She saw Buffy spin as if to fight even as she lunged at
her. Willow was suddenly aware of how much taller and bulkier she was than the Slayer. She
slammed the blond's small frame to the earth, overwhelming her supernatural strength with
ease. She gripped the tiny woman in massive, russet-haired arms, rippling muscles flexing
to contain her struggles.
"Willow, please..." Buffy gasped, her body arching and writhing in an effort to
escape. Their gazes locked and held, and suddenly beast-Willow was the captured instead of
the captor.
And then it was human hands that held the Slayer, and her struggles were no longer an
effort to escape, but rather to increase the contact. She arched up against Willow,
writhing wildly, dragging her head down to share a devastatingly erotic kiss. The Slayer
rolled her lover beneath her, hands sliding over her skin, stroking gently and drawing low
groans of arousal in response.
Willow could only surrender to the sweet sensations, offering herself up to their shared
passion.
"Fool," the Slayer whispered near her prey's ear, and she reared back, producing
a silver stake, that she hefted over her head, intent on destroying the beast.
She never had a chance. The beast-Willow was on her in a heartbeat, claws digging into her
skin, hot fetid breath burning her face, rough fur abrading her flesh. The chased silver
stake gleamed in the moonlight as a clawed hand wrapped around the Slayer's hand, cracking
bones against each other until she released the weapon it clattered across the floor. The
beast let out a chuffling laugh.
And then it tore the Slayer's throat out.
"No!" Willow gasped as she sat straight up in bed, eyes dilated, heart
hammering in her chest. She struggled violently with the sheets--panicked by the
remembered horror of the dream--until she scrambled free of the cloth prison and tumbled
free.
She hit the floor with a jaw rattling thump, then lay winded for a long moment, the feel
of cheap carpeting scratchy and rough against her cheek, her hair a crimson curtain across
her face. "God," the teen gasped, her voice shaking almost as hard as the rest
of her. She clawed at the carpet, wanting to banish the awful nightmare along with the
thick arousal still moving through her veins. "No," she whispered raggedly over
and over as need gave way to sick horror. "I don't want that." She only wanted
to make it all go away, the nightmares, the bloodlust, and mostly the harsh reality of
what she now was.
Finally, as the dream receded, she climbed back into bed, but this time she didn't sleep,
simply lay on top of the blankets, staring silently at the ceiling, helpless tears running
back from her eyes into her hair.
* * * * * *
Buffy found Oz at the crypt where they kept Willow locked away,
supervising the repairs to the cage. His friend was welding the door back together and
installing a fresh lock when she entered and did little more than wave one hand and mutter
a laconic, "Hi," when Oz introduced them. Buffy couldn't help but wonder if the
two were related.
"Could we talk?" the Slayer said simply.
Oz nodded. "Mike can do the rest." He nodded toward the entrance.
"Outside."
They found a pair of headstones that made decent seats and sat facing each other. Buffy
launched straight into her story, half afraid that if she didn't just get the words out,
she never would. Oz just stared at her through the entire recitation, his expression so
utterly expressionless that it was a little like talking to a wall.
When she finished, Buffy waited for Oz to respond, but he only continued to look at her.
Finally, an eyebrow lifted ever so slightly, letting her know that he was still breathing.
"You really don't see it," Oz said at last.
"See what?" the Slayer demanded. She just wanted this over and done, so she
could stop thinking about Oz and Willow, stop envisioning them touching as he tamed the
savage beast that lived inside her by making love to her. For reasons she didn't even want
to think about, the thought just hurt too much. A mental image of the near kiss she'd
shared with Willow flashed in her brain, taunting with her own desires when she was in the
process of handing over any possible future they might have to the only lover the hacker
had ever known.
Oz shook his head. "It's not me," he said softly, his tone as nonchalant as his
posture, though his knuckles were white where they rested on the marble headstone. "I
can't help."
Buffy dragged a hand through her hair in ragged frustration. "Dammit, Oz--"
But he shook his head insistently. "I mean it, Buffy, I can't help." And
then, as if he'd read her mind, he added. "And neither can Xander." He continued
staring at her, his gaze steady and unyielding, until Buffy finally looked away. A long
moment of silence followed, then Oz sighed softly. "We didn't break up because of the
wolf. Or because of Xander. It was just us."
Buffy clenched her hands at her sides, wishing she had an enemy she could fight. It would
have been so much simpler if she could have just kicked the crap out of someone or
something and made it all better.
"It wasn't right and we both knew it." He swallowed hard and something flickered
deep in his eyes, though it disappeared quickly, hidden behind the bland mask he showed
the world. "Look inside yourself for the answer," he told her after a long
moment, then pushed off his impromptu seat, landing lightly. "I should go make sure
Mike's doing a good job," he murmured, leaving Buffy staring after him in bemused
silence.
"God, I hate it when he goes all Yoda like that," the Slayer muttered at last,
fervently wishing that someone would just give her a straight answer sometime. Between
Giles and his books on magic, the occasional ambiguously prophetic dream, and now Oz's
monosyllabic advice, it was a wonder she knew anything at all.
* * * * * *
The Second Night
Another sunset, another full moon, another night of being tall, dark, and hairy.
Willow was safely locked inside her newly repaired cage, sitting with her back to the
wall, legs folded up against her naked chest, chin resting on her knees. Buffy had
thoughtfully rehung the blankets to maximize her privacy, then chased the guys out when
Xander couldn't seem to resist the urge to peek. She could here her friend telling them to
go home. They were just outside the crypt, but she could hear their voices as clearly as
if they were standing a few feet away. She could also smell the sweet tinge of the
Slayer's perfume--jasmine tonight--mixed with the less pleasant odor of Xander's
cologne--Brut, apparently no one had gotten it through his skull that women didn't find it
appealing--and Giles' soap of choice--something expensive with just a hint of sandalwood.
It was starting. Her senses were tuning up for the coming show.
Buffy reentered, her eyes wide as they met Willow's tired gaze. The wolf saw the fear in
the Slayer's look and pricked its ears, listening for the overstressed thud of her
heartbeat.
The dream. Willow remembered it without wanting to, remembered the taste of the Slayer's
blood filling her mouth-- No! I love Buffy, she reminded herself as she wrapped her
arms tightly around her legs, holding on as if she could somehow make it all go away.
"I love her," she whispered out loud, trying to force the nightmare out of
existence through sheer force of will.
And then the change began in earnest, the pain coming in wave upon wave as her body
twisted and morphed into something else entirely.
The last human words she uttered and the last human thoughts she had were simply, "I
love her."
Part Three
The wolf was in a mood again, hurtling itself at the bars and the
walls with supernatural ferocity, shredding anything it could reach with its talonlike
claws. Wisely, the Slayer made certain she was not within that deadly arc, instead
remaining back several yards, seated on a sarcophagus where she could watch the thing that
had been her friend. The strange thing about the werewolf was that it was perversely
beautiful, the muscles long and corded, standing out in sharp relief under its shaggy fur
coat, it's heavy head proud, the eyes dark and fathomless. Buffy wondered at her own
sanity as she noted the train of her thoughts.
As the night passed, the beast seemed to tire of its rage, quieting somewhat, its intense
dark eyes focused on the Slayer at all times as it slowed and began moving about the cage,
testing and pressing on each possible weakness.
Buffy reached out, checking the position of the loaded dart gun where it sat near her hip.
Apparently there was still enough of Willow in the creature to make it logical and far
more clever than the average bear. That made it dangerous.
And maybe it also made it reachable.
The Slayer canted her head to one side, watching the werewolf work its way around the
cage. "Will," she spoke very softly, not expecting any response.
She was surprised when an ear quirked her way, silently acknowledging the softly spoken
name.
Buffy frowned ever so slightly, easing off her impromptu seat to move closer. "Will,
can you hear me?"
The ear shifted, tracking Buffy's slow movements like a radar dish tracking a satellite.
The werewolf's eyes were dark, but there were a few flakes of green in them, a flicker of
Willow's color, Buffy realized when the creature looked up and their eyes met. The
Slayer's breath caught, her heart suddenly pounding out a rhumba beat in her chest. Willow
was in there. She could feel her. "I know you're there," she whispered as she
drew another step closer to the cage.
The werewolf watched her progress with narrowed eyes, its body tense, but unmoving.
"I know you're scared...and you're angry..." Buffy's voice caught. "I feel
like I should have protected you from this," she admitted, her voice rough. "I
dunno, maybe you do too...maybe that's why you're so angry..." Buffy knew that wasn't
true even as she said the words. Willow had never blamed her--never blamed any of
them--for what had happened to her.
The beast continued watching her. Buffy could sense that it was hunting her, but there was
something else there as well. Something that made her shiver with awareness. "I just
wish I could make it all better...wave a magic wand and make it go away." She drew
another step closer until that she was standing just outside of the creature's reach.
"I love you, Will," she whispered.
And the thing lunged, hurtling at the bars with enough force to dent them, startling the
Slayer so badly she tripped over her own feet and hit the floor on her backside. It
roared, screaming its rage as clawed hands swiped at the air mere inches from her splayed
legs.
The Slayer pressed backwards with her hands, momentarily panicked before she regained
control. She straightened with effort, forcing the terror down as she pushed to her feet.
"I do love you, Willow," she repeated, carefully pronouncing her friend's name
in hopes that whatever remained of Willow would hear.
The softly spoken words set the creature off on a fresh round of fury, but oddly enough,
the Slayer saw it as a good sign. It couldn't be a coincidence that the avowals of love
seemed to upset the thing.
So Buffy did the only thing she could think of. She kept telling Willow she loved her,
talking about their friendship, unburdening her heart to the creature, slowly digging
deeper into her own emotions until she was saying the things that she'd never even let
herself think before. The thing roared, beat on the walls and the bars, tore at the bolts
holding the bars in the wall, lost itself in rage and fury. And through it all, Buffy just
kept talking, though she kept a careful eye on the condition of the cage. Alone against
the werewolf, she couldn't risk having it get loose.
With morning drawing nearer, it finally seemed to beat out its rage, calming enough to
simply stand at the center of the cage as it listened to the Slayer pour out her heart,
the words tumbling from soft lips in unbidden sentences. In those hours, Buffy admitted
everything, to Willow...and to herself. And then at some point, they went past words,
leaving Slayer and werewolf staring at each other in silent fascination.
Buffy lifted a hand, holding it out, fingers spread as if braced against an invisible wall
that separated them. She was startled a beat later as the creature lifted its own paw in
imitation of her gesture. "I love you," she exhaled, amazed by the thick rush of
emotion that flared through her chest. Suddenly, she understood what Oz had been trying to
tell her. "I really do love you," she repeated in a tone of awed wonder as she
saw her own feelings laid out before her. Not just friendship or sisterly love, but
romantic, passionate, jealous, I-want-to-hold-you-close-and-never-let-go-love.
"My, what a sweet little scene," a knowing voice drawled from the doorway.
The Slayer pivoted neatly, dropping into a fighting stance as she faced the newcomers.
Vampires. Two punks she'd chased two nights before, only to have them escape into the
sewer. As the scent of their clothes reached her nostrils, she was amazed she hadn't
smelled them coming. The werewolf looked up, lips drawing back from vicious fangs as it
let out a deep, hate-filled growl.
"Yeah," the second vampire, a one time teenager with blue hair and a ring
through his nose. "Looks like the Slayer's gotta major case of puppy love."
The two laughed at their "witty" joke.
"Great," Buffy muttered. "Whose brilliant idea was it to vamp Beavis and
Butthead?"
"Huh huh," the blue-haired one did a fair Butthead impression--though Buffy
suspected it was more a byproduct of profound stupidity, than an intentional lifestyle
choice--then he reached into a jacket pocket and yanked out a revolver, pointing it at
her. "Betcha didn't expect this, huh?" he crowed victoriously when Buffy flashed
a surprised look at the weapon. "Even a Slayer dies when bullets are involved."
"Yeah," his pal confirmed. "Man, you'd think a few other vamps woulda
thought of using a gun, but no. Buncha ass-backwards, losers are stuck in the fourteenth
century. Right, my man?" The vamps turned to each other to share a high five, and
Buffy launched herself into action, delivering a roundhouse kick that sent the pistol
flying.
"Hey!" the blue-haired one complained as if she'd somehow cheated, then lunged.
Buffy blocked his attack with a roundhouse kick that knocked him back several feet, then
spun to deliver several hard blows to his pal to keep him busy. She couldn't afford to
have either of them get a long enough break to go after the lost pistol.
Lunge. Feint. Kick. Block. Punch. The pattern went on. Normally, she would have taken
these two with ease, but she was still sore and tired from the previous night and her
reactions were slow. The vampires were doing better against her than their sort should
have been able to do against the Slayer.
The fight had set the werewolf into a fresh frenzy and it hurtled itself into the bars
over and over, rattling the bolts that held them in place.
Suddenly, Buffy's foot hit a thick patch of dust and she momentarily pinwheeled in an
effort to regain her balance. It didn't work and she went down hard, scrambling for her
feet even as one of the vampires lunged after the lost pistol and the other one got his
hands on the forgotten tranquilizer gun and slammed the butt end into her temple. Pain
screamed through her skull, but she didn't go down again, instead blocking a second blow
as she tried to push back to her feet. With her head down and involved in the fight, she
didn't realize how close to freedom the werewolf was until the bolts tore out of the wall
with a squawling sound.
The vampires turned just as the wall of bars started to come loose. It was still braced
upright by the rough stone of the walls, but the werewolf's massive paws were sure to
change that state in mere moments.
"Holy shit," the blue-haired one exhaled.
His buddy was the one with the gun, but it hung useless at his side as he stared at the
beast in slack jawed disbelief. "They don't eat us, do they?" he questioned
nervously.
"Nah, man, we're already dead. How nutritional can we be?"
Buffy used the brief respite to climb to an unsteady half-crouch. The ground threatened to
tip beneath her feet, and she felt like she'd been run over by a Mack truck, but she was
still alive and she had every intention of staying that way. She was still trying to
decide what to do next when the wall came tumbling down, the bars clattering and clanging
as they hit the stone floor and stirred up decades worth of crypt dust.
"Oh, fuck," the blue haired one got out as the wolf attacked.
Buffy dove out of the way as werewolf and vampire went tumbling, rolling with the momentum
of her leap until she hit the far wall. Using the cool stone as a brace she pushed upright
in time to see the werewolf rend the blue-haired vampire into bits, literally flinging
body parts aside in its fury.
The Slayer's eyes widened, her chin lifting as an arm arced toward her, only to explode
into a bitter dust cloud only a few inches before making contact.
One vampire down.
One to go.
Finished with its first prey--and unsatiated by the dust that filled the air--the werewolf
turned gleaming eyes toward the other stoner-vamp.
"Oh, shit...you killed Kenny!" he exploded as he stumbled backwards, lifting the
pistol and firing convulsively.
"WILL!!" Buffy screamed helplessly as she saw the beast spasm with each hit.
The bullets drew bright spots of blood on dark brown fur, and further enraged the
creature, but they didn't slow it down. The werewolf lunged, fangs glinting brightly even
in the faint light.
The Slayer watched in horrified silence as the scene continued to unfold out of her
control.
The werewolf crashed into the second vampire, instantly digging in with teeth and claws.
The fight didn't last long.
And then the beast lost a second meal in a cloud of useless, eye-stinging dust.
"Oh, shit," Buffy breathed as she saw the thing start to rise, very certain that
in a moment, it would be aimed for her. She had calmed it before, but it had been behind
bars then, and exhausted from hours of raging. Now the hunting instinct was in total
control and she was under no illusions that the creature would spare her because its human
self was her best friend. Not when it was this hungry and this furious. The dart gun was
too far away for her to get to in time, and if the werewolf turned and lunged at her with
the full force of its ferocity, she wouldn't have a chance. As banged up as she was, the
werewolf would tear her to bits. And even if she did get lucky and survive, it would mean
killing Willow. So the Slayer did the only thing she could think of that might get both of
them through the night and launched herself straight at the creature's broad back.
It was like impacting hair-covered, moving cement carved in the shape of a werewolf, and
the Slayer's grunt of pain mixed with the creature's howl and rage at being attacked.
Buffy's fingers dug into long, bloody fur as she clung long enough to get an arm around
the beast's broad neck, despite its efforts to fling her off.
Outside the crypt, the world was at peace in a blue, predawn glow. Inside, sheer havoc
reigned.
Desperate to get the Slayer off its back, the werewolf, tried to reach back and grab her,
but jointed more like a wolf than a human, it couldn't reach her. For long moments, the
thing spun, howling impotently as it flung its human flea this way and that. Despite the
insane ride, Buffy managed to get both arms around the massive column of the thing's neck,
and hooked a leg around its heavy midsection. Outside, the sun was close to rising. As
battered as she was, she only had one real chance at survival; hold on long enough for the
transformation to begin and the creature to weaken.
And then it hammered backwards into a wall and Buffy almost let go. Her cry of agony
echoed the creature's cry of rage, but she somehow managed to tighten her hold, pressing
her forearms into its throat hard enough to cut off some air. They tumbled, rolled, and
slammed into the walls together, until, finally, the creature began to stagger. Weakened,
it stumbled to the center of the room, wavering on its feet. Whether from the rising sun,
the lack of oxygen or the combination of the two, some of the ferocity drained away, and
it stopped trying to knock Buffy off.
"It'll be okay, Will," Buffy panted near a hairy ear.
The creature grunted softly, and the ear twitched in response to her voice. Its chest was
streaked with dark blood, but the injuries were already almost completely closed.
The Slayer pressed her face into rough fur, suddenly aware of the tears streaking her
face, and the werewolf blood dotting her hands and arms, and soaking into her sleeves.
"Come back to me, Will..." she groaned. "Please, God. Remember I love
you."
The thing staggered, letting out a low whining cry as it toppled to its knees. Ropey
muscles quivered beneath rough hair and flesh. No longer trying to shake off its human
tormentor, it seemed to have forgotten her entirely.
"It'll be okay," Buffy whispered again, as much to reassure herself as the
creature.
The beast whimpered now, weaving back and forth.
Outside, the first rays of sunrise fell across the earth.
Buffy clung tightly to the creature as she heard and felt the change start. Bones shifted
and moved under her tight grip, the sounds echoing off the walls in horrifying stereo.
Together, the two figures toppled to the floor, still twined together in imitation of a
lover's embrace. The Slayer hid her face in the faint indentation at the center of her
friend's back, eyes tightly shut, her soft whispers echoing off changing flesh.
"I love you, Will. I love you."
Long minutes passed as the torturous change rippled through the young woman held tightly
in the Slayer's grip. The soft chink of lead hitting cement echoed through the room as the
bullets that had torn through the werewolf fell away from newly humanized flesh, leaving
faint, half-healed scars in their wake.
Buffy blinked slowly, lifting her head as she became aware that the hair and skin pressed
against her cheek had transformed from rough and scratchy to the smooth textures of silk
and velvet. Human once again, Willow lay limp in the circle of the Slayer's arms, naked,
her pale skin streaked with the dark blood of her other self. Buffy carefully slid her
hands over her friend's bare torso, hunting for and not finding any open wounds left by
the bullets that now lay around them on the ground.
"Thank God," Buffy exhaled, then allowed herself to relax, letting her head fall
until it was nestled in the curve of Willow's shoulder. A couple of days with no sleep had
pushed even her stamina to the limit, and the beatings she'd received two nights in a row
weren't helping in the least. So she snuggled up against Willow, too tired to care that a
dusty floor was their makeshift bed, content to simply hold the woman she--Buffy paused,
took a deep breath, then completed the thought--the woman she loved.
They were still lying like that long minutes later, when Willow stirred sleepily. The
hacker blinked in momentary confusion before the details of her surroundings began to sink
in, then tipped her chin down, noting the arms wrapped tightly around her torso.
"Buffy?" she mumbled weakly.
"It's okay," the Slayer exhaled near Willow's ear.
"But...what hap--" And then Willow saw the blood streaking her skin. "Oh,
God," she gasped. "I hurt you...oh, God--"
"No," Buffy insisted as she heard the horror in Willow's voice. Without planning
to, she tightened her hold, automatically containing the hacker's instinctive struggles.
"I'm okay, I'm okay," she whispered sharply to break through the panic.
"It's not my blood. It's yours."
Willow froze in Buffy's arms. "Mine?" she repeated. "I don't...nothing
hurts," she exhaled.
"The bullets weren't silver," Buffy whispered. "Which means, I guess, that
we can count at least one bit of arcane trivia as fact-ish." She turned her face into
Willow's hair, momentarily reassuring herself that she was okay. Almost instantly, the
redhead's struggles lessened, though her muscles remained tense. "Do you
remember...anything?" the Slayer whispered after a long beat.
Willow shivered, lying perfectly still in Buffy's arms as she tried to summon the hazy
images floating through her subconscious. It was like a particularly distant and violent
dream, except her id grew hair and fangs and tried to eat people three days a month. She
closed her eyes, trying to find her way through the confusing morass. "You were
talking to me," she breathed at last. "I was angry...but you kept talking...kept
telling me...something..."
Buffy felt her chest clench, uncertain whether to be disappointed that Willow didn't
remember what she'd said, or relieved. "Yeah," she confirmed without getting
specific and then quietly told Willow what had happened with the stoner-vamps and the
wolf's precipitous escape. "You saved my life," she whispered at last. "I
mean, the wolf did...but I think it knew...well, at least until I leaped on its back so it
couldn't decide to eat me...it was kind of a wild ride then...but just until the sun
rose..." she trailed off into silence, not knowing what else to say.
"Which is why you're lying on the floor...with me...naked?" Willow croaked after
a beat.
"Kinda...yeah..." Buffy didn't add how right it felt, even if they were
lying on a cold, dusty floor.
Seconds passed as Willow digested everything Buffy had told her and tried to fit it into
what little she did remember. And then a then a single moment sharpened into aching
clarity, the garbled soundtrack clarifying to let her hear a small snippet of softly
spoken words. "You said you love me," she exhaled after a long beat, her voice
dropping low with disbelief. Another second or two of silence ticked by.
"Buffy?"
The Slayer couldn't think to speak, didn't know what to say. Her brain just went
completely blank. "Will," she said at last, unconsciously smoothing her thumb
against the curve of Willow's shoulder where her hand rested. "I...I was just trying
to reach you...y'know...in there...make sure you know..." She swallowed hard.
"How important you are...to me...to all of the Scooby gang," she added as an
afterthought.
"Buffy?" Willow turned her head enough to look up into the Slayer's face where
her cheek rested against her shoulder.
The Slayer swallowed hard and didn't look away despite the temptation.
"I love you too."Willow's voice was so tiny it was almost inaudible, but Buffy
had no problem hearing her.
"Um...Buffy..." Giles cleared his throat, blinking against the faint light
inside the crypt.
Both girls looked up, eyes widening as they saw the Englishman standing in the entrance,
his posture uncomfortably stiff.
"Giles," the Slayer exhaled, wondering just how much he'd heard. Of course,
neither she nor Willow had said anything that couldn't be read in the most innocent light.
Actually, if she was honest with herself, she wasn't sure that any of it should be read in
anything but the most innocent light. Willow had said, 'I love you too,' but that could
just as easily mean 'I love you like a sister,' as 'I love you, I want you, get naked with
me.' Buffy wasn't even entirely sure how she meant the 'I love you.' Well, yes, actually,
she was sure how she meant the 'I love you.' She just wasn't sure how she felt about being
sure how she meant the 'I love you.' God, life was confusing some days.
Her Watcher looked at the downed cage bars, then back at the two girls. "What
happened?" he asked at last.
After carefully releasing her hold on the hacker, Buffy pushed into a sitting position.
"Those two vamps I missed last night showed up with a gun...kind of amazing they're
the first two ever to think of using one, because they were dumb as a sack of
hammers."
Giles moved the cage bars, crouching down to tug loose one of the blankets that had been
used to shield Willow's modesty, then tossed it toward the two girls.
Buffy pushed to one knee with a wince, caught the blanket thrown her way, then slipped the
rough fabric around Willow's shoulders as she helped her to sit up, eyes lingering
momentarily on her bare torso: just long enough to glimpse the six silvery scars that
hadn't been there the night before. The bullet wounds had healed, but not without leaving
their mark. "The werewolf got out, did them in, and then, we kinda had a little
dance...and then the sun rose. End of story."
The Watcher slowly rose, pivoting to stare at his young charge, his face several shades
paler. "It escaped...and you fought?"
"It was more of a hold on and pray thing, but there was a bit of an
altercation," Buffy allowed.
"Buffy, this is no time for levity!" Giles snapped impatiently as he hurried to
them. "Were you bit or scratched? If the werewolf even--"
"No," the Slayer shot back. "Battered around a bit, but that's it."
She felt Willow shiver against her side, and slid an arm across her shoulders, giving her
a comforting hug. It couldn't be easy for her to hear that she had hurt anyone in any way.
"We're okay," she added defiantly, willing Giles to see how he was hurting
Willow.
The former librarian's eyes dropped to the young woman leaning against Buffy, her head
down, her slender body trembling as though the words were blows. His eyes lifted to meet
the Slayer's blazing gaze, then slid over her narrow frame, hunting for any sign of blood
or injury. When their eyes met again, he searched her face, suddenly wondering about the
quiet declaration he'd heard while entering. His initial instinct was to simply chalk it
up to an expression of their friendship, but looking into the Slayer's eyes, and seeing
the possessive way she held on to her friend, he suddenly found himself wondering about
that. He was still trying to decide whether or not to say anything when a fresh set of
footsteps on the stairs brought all of their heads up and around.
"Hey, I come bringing don...uts..." Xander Harris skidded to a halt as he saw
the condition of the crypt. His eyes found the trio where they were clustered together in
the center of the room. "Looks like a bad night," the teen exhaled after a beat.
"Major understatement," Buffy murmured, then looked down at Willow, pointedly
ignoring the other two as she questioned, "Think you can stand?"
The hacker nodded, leaning against Buffy as they both rose. Giles hovered, reaching out to
steady the two girls when they both looked to be on the verge of collapsing again.
Xander dropped the box of donuts and hurried forward to steady his friends as well. He
glanced over at the collapsed cage bars. "You guys okay?" he questioned.
"Fine, great, wonderful," Buffy groaned, flinching as her body reminded her of
the pounding she'd taken.
Willow wrapped the dusty blanket more firmly around herself. "Very naked," she
added on a groan, suddenly aware of a slight twinge across her chest and stomach, like old
scars pulling, as she moved.
Xander's brows lifted in an automatic leer. "I noticed that."
Used to Xander's sense of humor, Willow just rolled her eyes.
Xander glanced back at the now ruined werewolf cage. "So, what are we gonna do with
the Willow-wolf tonight?"
The other three followed the line of his gaze.
"We'll...ah...think of something..." Giles murmured at last.
"Hopefully something a little stronger than the last something," Xander observed
dryly.
"Hopefully," Willow agreed, then allowed herself to be led out and back into the
sunlight, content to simply not worry about it for a little while.
* * * * * *
Buffy looked up from her bed as Willow entered their shared dorm
room, swathed in her terrycloth robe, her hair damp from the shower, smelling fresh and
sweet. "Feel better?" she questioned without moving. She lay sprawled in her own
robe, her hair freshly dried, the bruises from the wolfy encounter already starting to
fade. Clean and with a fresh nap under her belt, she was feeling surprisingly good.
Despite everything, they'd gotten through the night with no harm, no foul.
The hacker nodded slowly. "Yeah...hate the smell of crypt-dust in my hair," she
babbled, trying not to notice the graceful length of Buffy's legs, or the heady smell of
her soap. And definitely trying not to remember near-kisses and avowals of love that maybe
weren't really meant the way she wanted them to be meant.
Buffy pushed upright, watching Willow silently. "How're the bullet wounds?" she
questioned worriedly. They had no way of knowing if there were any serious consequences to
being hurt while she was a werewolf.
Reminded of the injuries, Willow pressed a self-conscious hand to her chest, brushing
lightly against the front of her robe over the spots where the bullets had hit the
werewolf. "They kinda tingle...not hurt exactly...just...I dunno, I can't explain.
There are scars, but even those are fading." She shook her head slowly, plainly
amazed by the whole thing.
Buffy let out a soft whistle. "And I thought that Slayer-healing thing was
impressive," she murmured.
Willow sank down on the edge of her bed. "I'm just grateful I didn't hurt you,"
she exhaled, still bothered by the damage she could have done.
Wisely, the Slayer made no mention of her bumps and bruises.
"I don't think I could live with that," Willow added in a low voice as she
stared down at her linked fingers. Just the thought of hurting Buffy made her stomach
clench with raw nausea, until she just wanted to find a hole, crawl in and never come out.
Sometimes, she was so ashamed of thing that lived in her, of the changes she could feel
seeping through her very soul that she just wanted to run away and never come back. A part
of her suspected it would be safest for all of them.
Sensing the wall that came up between them, Buffy bounded off the bed, moving to kneel in
front of Willow. "I'm okay," she assured her friend and reached up to brush a
few strands of wet hair back from her cheek. "You didn't hurt me." She dropped
her hand to cover Willow's where they rested in her lap. "Not even the wolf
did."
Willow swallowed hard, trying to force down the threat of tears without great success.
Unable to force any words past the tightness in her throat, she just shook her head back
and forth.
Buffy could feel her own heart hammering in her chest. "You were in there, Will. You
saved me."
Green eyes lifted to meet Buffy's gaze. "I love you," Willow whispered simply,
the words spilling out before she could call them back. Her eyes dropped, but not before
Buffy caught a glimpse of the emotion that lived there. It nearly knocked the Slayer off
her feet.
"Will," Buffy croaked and reached out to cover Willow's hands with her own.
"I think maybe we need to talk," she breathed after a long beat.
"No," Willow burst out almost instantly. "I mean, it's okay. You don't have
to say anything...I know...I mean...I know you don't feel the same way...that you just
meant you love me like a friend earlier...I know that...I just...I guess I wanted you to
know--"
"Shhh," Buffy hushed her gently and reached up to lay a finger over rose kissed
lips. "It's okay." She stroked her fingers back from Willow's lips along her
cheek, then outlined the curve of her jaw as she slid up onto the bed next to her friend,
sitting close enough to feel the heat of her body, even through the double thickness of
both their robes. Without conscious planning, she trailed her fingers down the slender
arch of the hacker's throat, then slipped them under the edge of her robe, well aware of
how her friend tensed when she slowly pressed the fabric back until Willow's left shoulder
was bare. Buffy brushed her thumb over smooth skin, pausing as she found the faint
imperfection right at the center of the joint. The tiny silvery scar was barely visible,
but she could feel the knot of still healing flesh and knew there would be others to match
it hidden farther under her friend's robe. "God," the Slayer exhaled heavily,
barely able to force down the hard shudder that rattled her narrow frame. The whole night
had seemed painfully unreal, but suddenly it was even more painfully real. She slid her
fingers down along the veed edge of the robe, slowly parting it to reveal more of the
valley between gently rounded breasts, until she saw a second faint scar, this time on the
upper curve of her right breast. Buffy knew all to well where to hit to strike cleanly.
Another half an inch and the shot would have hit Willow square in the heart, and God only
knew if even a werewolf could survive a wound that severe."You could have been
killed," she whispered at last.
Willow swallowed hard, trying to wet her suddenly sandy-dry mouth to speak, but totally at
a loss as to what to say when the only thing she could think of was the gentle fingers
resting against her chest right over her heart. Okay, so maybe that whole near-kiss,
"I love you," stuff hadn't been quite as meaningless and platonic as she'd
feared. She caught Buffy's hand in her own, holding it tight to her chest until the Slayer
had to feel the solid beat of her heart. This wasn't the wolf, just Willow. "I'd
rather that than ever hurt you," she whispered intensely.
Buffy paled, understanding too well what Willow was saying, what she was giving her
permission to do if the need should ever arise. "No," she growled. "Don't
say that." She pulled her hand free, lifting it to cup Willow's face in her palm,
sliding her fingers back into silky hair. "It won't come to that...I won't let
it."
"You're the Slayer. It--"
"No," Buffy cut her off, blinking back the threat of tears. "No." They
were facing each other now and she lifted her other hand, so she was framing Willow's
face. "We'll get through." All of Giles' information about werewolves and their
hormonal needs was forgotten. It wasn't about doing the right thing, or taming any beast.
It was just about loving each other and accepting that love no matter how frightening the
prospect might be. "I love you," she breathed.
And then they were kissing--though neither one would ever remember who had moved
first--and losing themselves in the innocence of sharing that first simple intimacy. First
kisses led to second kisses, and the sweetness of first caresses, broken only by soft
words of affection and low groans. And when their lips parted, it was to no more than a
hand's breadth, so close that their breath warmed the space between them. Foreheads just
touching, they shared the moment, content to simply savor the closeness. And when they lay
down together, bodies stretched out and twined together, they both knew it was only the
first time of many.
* * * * * *
Two Months later - Third night of the full moon
Buffy sat cross-legged near the newly designed werewolf cage, a redesigned titanium
job that had begun life as a shark cage before Oz had traded his van for it and then
talked one of his buddies into some specialized modifications. If his friends wondered
what the heck was up in Giles' basement, they were all either too polite, or more likely
too mellow to ask.
Inside the cage, the werewolf was pacing, its tightly packed muscles flexing with each
step. Occasionally, it would let out a ferocious roar, but they'd sound-proofed the room,
so Giles' neighbors hadn't noticed anything too strange. Well, no stranger than usual.
Buffy suspected Giles was fast altering any misconceptions on the part of his neighbors
regarding the boring normalcy of Brits. Particularly in light of the recent construction,
not to mention his current bleached-blond houseguest. They had to be wondering about
Spike.
"How's she doing?" Oz questioned as he entered the converted basement. His eyes
touched on the Slayer, then slid on the beast inside the cage. The beast had eyes only for
Buffy and spared him only the quickest of glances.
Buffy set down the book she'd been reading to look up. "Quiet mostly. A little
growling and footstamping, but I think that's mostly boredom. She gets that way around
midnight." The Slayer shrugged. "Figured I'd get a little humanities homework
done. Besides, she seems to like the Coleridge."
Oz peered at the woman sitting near the cage, but just out of range of sharp claws--not
that the wolf ever threatened her anymore. "No," he disagreed without
showing what it cost to make the admission. "She loves you." He sighed
very softly as he turned to go again. Buffy's soft voice caught him at the foot of the
stairs.
"Oz."
He glanced back, allowing himself the faintest of facial expressions--a tiny wistful
smile--as his eyes met hers.
"Thank you."
He nodded, then turned and began climbing the stairs, the Slayer's soft following him all
the way to the landing as she read quietly.
"He prayeth well, who loveth well
Both man and bird and beast.
He prayeth best, who loveth best
All things both great and small;
For the dear God who loveth us,
he made and loveth all."
When he glanced back from the landing, it was to see the wolf settling in, its ears
perked, content to listen to the sound of its human lover's voice.
END