FIC: Christmas (A.K.A. Tis the Season)

CHRISTMAS (A.K.A. TIS THE SEASON)

Trimming the tree, Buffy was only half-listening to an instrumental version of "Hark, the Herald Angels Sing," as it played on the stereo. Her mother was trying very hard to create a Christmas-y atmosphere, but she just wasn't feeling it this year. Though inno way was her lack of spirit her mother's fault. The fireplace was in use; despite the fact that they were in the midst of a typical California heat wave. She hadn't even factored in the humidity, either. Any more traditional, she'd find reindeer on the roof, and Frosty melted on the porch.

Her "less than jolly attitude" was because of the current, mini-downswing her life was taking. Three years they'd lived on the Hellmouth, and usually, she had zero difficulty being happy and falling in step with the season. Christmas had this amazing ability to be able to easily shove everything negative under the rug; it certainly kept the demons away. She wouldn't deny the whole commercial aspect of the holiday, but there always seemed to be something in the air. Something that made people smile just a little bit more than normal - even if they had no reason to.

Except this year, she wasn't part of the blissful, "we can forget our problems" crowd.

She had a vampire ex-boyfriend who was going nuts, friends whose rocky love lives she felt somehow responsiblefor, and a partner whom she was on shaky ground with. A few, weak threads were holding their already fragile friendship together, and they hadn't really spoken in weeks to try attempting repairs.

Mistakes were made on both sides in that mansion, and Buffy wanted to set things right. She had gone to her today, extending an invitation for quality time. Saying that it had been strained and awkward was an understatement. Faith had lied straight to her face, and she just walked out, not pushing or persuading once. Why did she do that?

The doorbell rang. The doorbell?

The two generations exchanged questioning looks, and she went to see who could possibly be at the door. It was strange to her, how things were changing. When Faith first showed up she had wanted to avoid her at all costs, yet now, only a few months later, she found herself caring about her -

"Hey." Faith said, shyly and uncertainly, standing on the other side of the door.

- and enjoying her company.

"Hi." Buffy responded, unable to hide the surprise from her voice. She saw that the brunette was carrying two gifts in her hand.

"Uh, looked like that whole party thing was gonna be kind of a drag." Faith looked down for a second, before meeting the blonde's eyes again. "I didn't really have anything...you know."

She smiled, fighting the urge to hug her. This was a big step towards closing the gap, and unfamiliar territory for Faith. She couldtell that the Bostonian was nervous.

"I'm glad you came."

Faith smiled when she heard the sincerity, beginning to relax. Perhaps the first genuine smile Buffy had seen from her, which further proved her theory that Christmas got to everybody. But it wasn't just that.

"Uh...here." Faith handed over the gifts.

"Why don't you come in from the entire lack of cold?" Buffy suggested.

She closed the door when Faith accepted.

"Uh, that one," The younger slayer pointed, "is for your mom. They're pretty crappy."

The expense didn't matter.

"Faith, you made it." Joyce said happily, coming over. She took the gifts from her daughter. "Oh, that is so thoughtful."

Buffy watched her as she smiled, embarrassed. "They're crappy."

This wasn't Faith the Slayer, Faith the Cynical, or Faith the Sex Fiend. This was Faith the Girl, and all her defenses were down. Buffy had the opportunity to get to know the real person behind the walls; the innocent, unsure person who was standing in front of her mother with her hands behind her back, probably silently praying she'd make a good impression andnot get herself thrown out.

There were only three words to describe the scene. Pretty Damned Adorable.

"You know, I'm gonna go upstairs and get your gifts. Excuse me." Buffy announced, and then hurried upstairs, missing Faith's wide-eyed _expression_ of disbelief. "Okay, Mom, don't touch yours, though, cause then you're gonna know what it is." She called down.

***

Someone had gotten her gifts? She didn't understand it, but the thought caused another smile.

Faith had decided to put the act aside temporarily. The "I don't need anyone vibe" was shut off, the tough chick persona...all of the things she hid behind were gone for the time being. Was she scared? Damn straight she was, but if it got her one, pleasant, holiday memory, it'd be worth it. Especially if that memory included the Summers'. They apparently didn't mind having her around, so she wasn't going to blow this opportunity.

Checking out the surroundings as she walked into the living room, she had no clue why she'd bothered to string up those lights in the motel. This was so much better. Cozy, full of seasonal cheer. In Boston, she used to stare in at the families with these types of places. Now she was on the other side of the window, and shefelt like a part of something for once. She knew she wasn't really, but it was nice to pretend. Christmas was a weird time, and not even she could escape its pull.

That was the reason she was here, the reason she had chosen to suck it up and accept Buffy's invite. Well, not the holiday alone, but it did give her the courage to do this.

Joyce came back with a cup of eggnog. "I'll just set it on the table." When she put it down, she came over to the slayer. "Can I take your coat?"

Faith shrugged it off, andgave it to her. "Thanks, Mrs. S."

"Thanks for coming." She went to hang the jacket up in the closet, and Faith couldn't stop herself from blushing. Again.

Usually she would be gone by now; she would've moved on to the next town, city...wherever. It seemed like the logical thing to do, given that the person she came to Sunnydale for had kicked her ass, misunderstanding or not. But, and this was odd, she didn't want to leave. There was something about Buffy that made her stay, made her care, and made her dress semi-respectably. In a gray, buttoned, collar-shirt that showed absolutely no cleavage.

Except...she had to roll up the sleeves some. What could she say? She was a rebel.

That something also made her furiousat Scott when he dumped her partner, and it made her want to work things out. Coming back for another try left her more vulnerable, but they could be a great team; it was almost like they were tied. Buffy must have thought so too, orshe wouldn't be a guest in her house. A welcomed, wanted guest, who was going to drink eggnog and receive presents.

Though as lucky as she felt, she was envious of Buffy's life, of all that the blonde had working in her favor. Her initial reaction had been that this was charity, however, looking into Buffy's eyes a minute ago had shown her that wasn't the case. Shockingly enough, Buffy saw her as an equal, as important. That was another thing she didn't understand, but hopefully that offer of trust was still up for grabs.

"Angel's in trouble." Buffy said, rushing down the stairs.

Faith noticed that she had changed, and was now wearing a black sweater instead of a red tank top. The younger slayer paid attention to detail. "What?"

"He was upstairs, and he's..." She trailed offas she searched for her coat, and finding it on an arm of the sofa, she snatched it. "I just need you to stay with Mom in case he comes back." She headed for the door, and Faith followed.

"Yeah, I'll play watchdog. I don't really get it, though."

"I'll explain later. Everything. I promise."

Then she was out the door.

"Watch your back." Faith told her retreating form, worried.

Once she lost sight of her, the brunette sighed and shut the door. How come he was always in the way?

***

Buffy had gone to Giles', desperate to find out where the priests were, the things that were helping to slowly drive Angel insane. They had been researching for the past half hour, but as much as she wanted to help him, as much as she loved him, she wanted to let go. Becauseshe was tired of holding on, tired of feeling guilty, and tired of locking a part of herself off from everyone. It wasn't the same anymore.

All she wanted was a nice, normal Christmas, spent with her mother and Faith. She ran away, though. Faith came, and she ran away not five minutes later. What kind of message did that send? It looked bad; it told Faith that she wasn't serious, that her priorities didn't include establishing any type of relationship whatsoever. That was the wrong message, and she had screwed up again.

She liked the idea of having someone by her side. 'The Chosen Two' had a nice ring to it.

This was going to end now.

"Let me see that." Giles handed her the book he'd been reading from. "'...the Harbingers of death. Nothing shall grow above or below...'"

The gears began to turn.

"What?" Her watcher asked.

Putting the book down, she went to his phone and dialed.

"Faith?...He didn't..." She breathed a sigh of relief. "Great. I didn't think he would, just being careful, you know?...Yeah, I'm fine, but...can you meet me?" She asked slowly, and then smiled. "Just tell her to lock the doors...I think I might need you to watch my back."

It was time to stop being afraid of letting someone in. If Faith could drop her defenses, so could she.

***

Faith walked around the fence enclosing the Christmas Tree Lot, trying to see why Buffy was suddenly interested in the place, though all she was picking up was an intense, pine scent. It was fragrantly pleasing, sure, but dangerous? Not by her standards. Going back to the chained and padlocked entrance gate, she chose to sit and wait. Everyone was at home with family, and her partner wanted to look for evil in Santa's forest? It lacked sense.

She should've known that if it had to do with Angel, it wasn't supposed to be rational. This was the norm where he was concerned.

The feeling she got when she saw the vampire...it told her not to like him. And starting off on the wrong foot certainly didn't help. Their introduction - her beating the crap out of him because she thought he was soulless and attacking Post - wasn't exactly pleasant. In actuality,he'd been attacking her because the rouge watcher was the bad guy. Or girl. That night hadn't gone her way; she'd been played expertly, in fact. She hated looking like an idiot.

Buffy hadn't told anyone about his return, least of all her, and that went along with the theme of irrationality. Maybe if the blonde had, Faith wouldn't have been so impulsive. Then again, there was that feeling. Her blood boiled, and she wanted to save Buffy from him. Guyswere good only for "tension relief" down below; getting attached lead to being stomped on, she had experience. Plus, Angel was a demon, which meant increased risk. Her partner must've been blind to that.

She was still sketchy on the whole "love drama roller-coaster" that was the relationship. From what the friends said, they were Romeo and Juliet with a little bloodlust thrownin just to spice things up. Other than that simple overview, she knew nothing.The group was apparently left out of the loop too, but that didn't make it hurtany less. She figured there was deep pain surrounding the issue, which would explain why Buffy wasn't forthcoming with info, and she could relate.

But the older slayer didn't know that, didn't know her, so how could she have expected sharing? Faith had to be willing to reveal who she really was for the slayers to bond, and Buffy had to be willing to do the same. Beyond the stories, jokes, and the attraction. Of slaying. Of slaying together. The attraction of slaying together.

Yeah, beyond that.

The brunette was prepared to do whatever was necessary; she just wished she knew why. Why she wanted to be in someone's life as badly as she wanted to be in Buffy's. It went against everything she practiced, and she couldn't seem to stop it. The person in question was running up to her now.

"Good, you're here." Buffy smiled.

Faith got to her feet. "I'll always have your back, B.Just return the favor once and a while, and it's five by five."

"It doesn't have to be five by anything, cause if you ever need me..." The blonde trailed off. This wasn't about favors. "I'll always have your back, too. You're my friend, Faith, and I don't save my friends' lives just so they can repayme later. I don't keep score."

"Then why d'ya do it?"

"Watch out for my friends? Because I like them, I care about them...and they let me pretend I have a life." She smirked. "I mean, I try to protect as many people as I can, but friends and family come first." She thought about what she said. "I guess I'm not exactly impartial. Do you think that's a bad thing?"

Faith smiled, shaking her head. "You got priorities - definitely a good thing. But what about the sleazebags?"

"Hey, I just work here. If they deserve to get hit by a bus after we've done the rescuing, they probably will." She grinned.

"So we're...friends, huh?" The younger slayer asked, tense and hesitant.

"I hope we are. Or, you know, I wanna be..." Buffy was the shy one suddenly.

The Bostonian still fought with shaking her outlook on the world. You always had to owe somebody; nothing was done for free, and certainly not out of kindness. But Buffy wasn't jerking her, she could tell. Friendship. It's what she wanted; someone she could count on. And despite afew lingering doubts, she was thrilled. Though if she were perfectly honest with herself, she'd discover that she was slightly disappointed.

"Me too." Faith said quickly. Both girls relaxed considerably then, happy at their agreement, but felt as if they were waiting for something more. They couldn't name it, though, and the thought vanished from their minds. "Gonna tell me what we're doin'?"

The older slayer looked at her oddly for a moment, and then the words registered to her brain. "Oh yeah." She kicked in the gate, and Faith raised her eyebrows. "Ready for a story?"

"It Dickens? Cause he rules."

"Nope, not him." She laughed at Faith's pout. There were definitely things about her she didn't know. "But now that you mention it, it is sorta similar. Well, minus Tiny Tim, the Ghost of Christmas Future, and Mickey Mouse."

They went into the lot, side by side.

"No offense, B, but the best was the one with the Muppets. Hands down." Faith insisted, pausing briefly. "This story's gonna suck, isn't it?"

"You have no idea."

***

"Dead by sunrise!" The large, smoky, beast-like figure of the First Evil bellowed asit disappeared.

Buffy stared blankly, frozen in a state of shock due to the being's departing threat. Her mind raced, as millions of thoughts came and went. Most were insignificant, pointless. Thinking was the last thing she should've been doing, but she couldn't focus. She couldn't get her legs to move. She had to act or Angel was going to die, cease to exist, float on the wind. He meant so much to her, yet, no running. Not even a brisk jog.

The slayer was trapped in her head.

'Hope Mom remembered to take the cookies out of the oven...I wonder how Willow and Oz are doing?...Why did I bring a jacket? It's not like it's gonna snow...Faith looks great...It looked and sounded just like Miss Calendar...How can you get a C on an opinion paper?...If Angel dies, I don't have to hold on anymore...I need a new jacket anyway...But then there's guilt and it's like sending him to Hell all over again...Faith looks great?... '

Blinking and forcing herself to surface, she made the world slow down, and glanced around the cave the Priests had used as their chanting spot. Out of the trio that she and Faithhad faced, two were unconscious, and one had run away. On the challenge-meter they ranked extremely low, but they had succeeded in screwing up Angel's mind. She could've easily dealt with them on her own, except she enjoyed slaying withher partner.

She knew they functioned well together, she knew something connected them during the fight, but the best thing she got out of teaming up, was fun. She understood where Faith was coming from now. The knowledge thatyou had the power, that you were going to win, it was exhilarating. She was starting to feel that on solo patrols, but it was better with the brunette. Much better.

There was that extra comfort level, where they both knew they wouldn't let anything happen to the other, and that freed them, allowed them to be a little inventive. To experiment, and should the desire arise, to show off to each other. At her core, Buffy remained serious, though not so serious that she simply went through the motions like a robot. Faith's attitude was rubbing off on her; hers was rubbing off on Faith. They were achieving a nice balance.

So why did she try distancing herself before? Was it solely to hide her past mistakes and the emotional meltdown that had occurred because of them? Or was there another reason altogether?

Faithwas talking to her, but she wasn't registering the words. She turned, immediately drawn into those deep, brown eyes. Excited, wild, nervous, and complex, they had seen a lot of suffering. Buffy was blind to a lot; she'd admit that. She might've been more mature than most, but she was still just seventeen. Whatshe wasn't blind to, was the fact that the younger slayer hadn't had an easy life, and most likely saw a darker side of humanity because of that.

She was naïve in that way; her experience with evil human beings was limited.The worst people stayed on the Five O'clock News, and changing the channel got rid of them in less than a second. Hopefully when her partner and friend felt comfortable enough to tell her about that stuff, she was prepared to hear it.

But there was something else visible behind the fire, even behind the hurt, when Faith looked at her. She couldn't identify it though,and was unaware that that same something was in her own eyes when she looked back at Faith, who did manage to be appealing at all times. Whatever it was, it made her reevaluate the strength of her feelings for Angel. Which confused her, because he and Faith both had different roles. The brunette was a friend; he was a once-lover who she seemingly couldn't get over no matter how hard she tried.

If she were to go to him, what would she say? If she didn't go to him, what did that say about her?

"B! Are we savin' your boy's ass or what?" Faith asked, her voice sounding loud to Buffy's ears. "Take it outta neutral, come on!"

The world resumed its normal pace. The course of action had been decided for her.

***

As Buffy ran out into the mansion's garden searching for Angel, Faith hung back, going over to a trunk that had caughther eye. The last time she was here she hadn't really made an effort to absorb the details, but the dolls sitting beside the trunk were hard to miss now. Could Angel have developed some sort of very disturbing fetish? She cringed. Thatwas too creepy even for her to consider. Buffy told her the guy was forbidden to have casual sex for eternity, but...damn.

She didn't think there were restrictions when it came to screwing, but this was going to cause herto draw a few lines.

Ignoring the visuals and the toys, she flipped up the lid, seeing a stockpile of swords, knives, and other, assorted weaponry. It was an impressive collection. Ancient, but impressive. She searched throughit, looking for one that would get the job done in the fewest blows possible. Just in case whatever Buffy's Plan A was, didn't work, it would be irresponsibleof her not to have a Plan B. She thought force would be appropriate.

The story had been about Angel's killing days, the gypsy curse, and then fast-forwarding to the present, where the First Evil wanted to drive him so out of his mind that he would revert back to his old habits. The hot and heavy part, and its fall out, had been understandably skipped over; that would've taken more time than they had to spare. She still wanted to know, but Buffy would tell her when she was ready.

It wasn't a voiced promise, but Faith didn't need one. The blonde was an open book to her now, and that went both ways.

She settled for a nice and heavy axe, and took the stairs in the garden that led out back. Seeing Buffy come up to Angel at the top of the hill, she stayed out of the way and listened. Plan A hadn't failed yet.

"I bet half the kids down there are already awake. Lying in their beds...sneaking downstairs...waiting for day." Angel commented, looking down on Sunnydale.

Buffy sounded out of breath. "Angel, please. I need for you to get inside. Th-there's only a few minutes left."

"I know. I can smell the sunrise long before it comes."

Smell the sunrise? Faith didn't realize the sunrise had a scent.

"I don't have time to explain this." Buffy was rushing. "You just have to trust me. That thing that was haunting you -"

"It wasn't haunting me. It was showing me." The tortured vampire interrupted.

'What the hell?'

"Showing you?" The blonde questioned.

"What I am."

"Were." Buffy corrected him.

"And ever shall be. I wanted to know why I was back. Now I do."

"You *don't* know. Some great evil takes credit for bringing you back and you buy it? You just give up?"

This was tearing her partn...her friend apart, Faith could hear that, and it tore her up having to watch. But something was telling her to keep doing it.

"I can't do it again, Buffy. I can't become a killer." Angel snapped harshly.

The brunette didn't like that tone.

"Then fight it."

"It's too hard."

Damn it. Now she was feeling sorry for the guy, despitethe cowardice. He was filled with pain and guilt, lots of it. She'd seen it before, known people who wanted to commit suicide. Most just wanted attention and weren't serious about following through, but there were some that were deadset on ending everything. They were the haunted ones that gave you chills. Her gut was telling her that Angel wasn't screwing around. He didn't want to live.

"Angel, please, you *have* to get inside." That was desperation.

Tears. He was making her cry. She was doing all this for nothing; nothing she said was going to change his mind - short of an act of God. Faith felt the hate again.

"It told me to kill you. You were in the dream. You know. It told me to lose my soul in you and become a monster again."

She could almost see the threads severing.

"I know what it told you. What does it matter?"

"Because I wantedto! Because I want you so badly! I want to take comfort in you, and I know it'll cost me my soul, and a part of me doesn't care." He was crying, too.

Oh shit. She got it. Why didn't she get it before? They boinked, he lost it, got back in the killing game, and played with her head along the way. Buffy probably had to send him packing...it was like the puzzle was complete. Faith had misread the older slayer. She wasn't incapable of letting loose or having a good time; she was just scared of it. Buffy was the way she was for a hell of a good reason, and Faith wanted to take all the hurt behind that reason, away. Maybe they weren't so different.

Allshe had gone through, and she still wanted to help him. Bastard didn't appreciate her.

"Look, I'm weak. I've never been anything else. It's not the demon in me that needs killing, Buffy. It's the man."

"You're weak. Everybody is. Everybody fails. Maybe this evil did bring you back, but if it did, it's because it needs you. And that means that you can hurt it." The loser remained unresponsive. "Angel, you have the power to do real good, to make amends. But if you die now, then all that you ever were was a monster."

'You tell 'em, B.'

Uh oh. Thesky was lightening.

"Angel, please, the sun is coming up!" Buffy pleaded with him.

Faith became even angrier. She was reduced to begging?

"Just go."

"I won't!"

"What, do you think this is simple? You think there's an easy answer? You can never understand what I've done! Now go!"

They were beginning to cross a bad line. The Bostonian tensed, and started to walk in their direction.

"You are not staying here." Buffy grabbed his arm. "I won't let you!"

"I said leave!" He nearly growled, pulling free.

Faith watched her sock him in the face, and then he shoved her away, forcing her to fall face-first into the ground. That was it. She couldn't sit on the sidelines anymore. No woman should get even a pinch on the arm if they didn't ask for it, and the blonde sure as hell didn't ask to be tossed around and to fear for her life. So when he got on top of her, started shaking her, and she started yelling "no," the brunette lost all capabilityto think rationally.

Screw it. She didn't need the axe; throwingit aside, she wanted him to feel her fists.

"Am I a thing worth saving, huh? Am I a righteous man? The world wants me gone!"

In a split second, he was being pulled off of Buffy and beaten mercilessly. The older slayer got to her feet quickly, and was planning to stop Faith, but couldn't quite bring herself to do it. The realization that nothing she said or did was going to save his life was forced upon her, and if she couldn't get him inside, what could? If he loved her like she had believed, he would've followed herin, but he obviously didn't. It felt like somebody untied a knot in her stomachthat she didn't even know was bothering her.

"You wanna see abuse?"Her knuckles slammed into his temple. "Don't ever touch her again!" A second time. "You deserve to die!" A third. "You can't even see what..." Left side of his face. "Pathetic." The right. "Goddamn." It didn't matter where it landed, as long as it did. "Asshole loser! Go rot in hell, she doesn't need you!"

"Faith...Faith, let's go." Buffy put her hand on her friend's shoulder.

The assault stopped, but she leaned down to whisper to him. "She's my only shot. I just found her, so no way am I gonna let anything get close enough to do damage. Not even a scratch; that's a promise. Goes double for you - wicked bad call you just made. If you pick your ass up and decideto hang around...keep that in mind. But if you're not movin', then enjoy the rays."

***

The slayers were on the sidewalk in front of the mansion, trying to distance themselves from it, when the snow started falling. It had been tense back there, and they weren't sure what to say. Faith looked up first, then Buffy. The sight wasn't all that uncommon to the Bostonian, as she had lived most of her life on the East Coast, but the native Californian had this _expression_ of amazement that captured Faith's complete attention. As the flakes hit their faces, it became clear that the weather wasn't an illusion.

"Son of a bitch." The dark-haired girl said softly - Angel got his act of God. "Who keeps cutting him a break?"

"He's got plenty to make up for." The lighter-haired one said with a frown and a sigh. "I guess they don't want him taking the easy way out."

Faith cleared her throat, her eyes drifting downward. "Look, B...Buffy...I lose it sometimes, just happens...ever since I got old enoughto fight back. You -"

Buffy could tell from before that the other slayer really cared about her, and well, it was mutual.

"You don't have to apologize; I'm...glad you were there. I wouldn't have seen it if you weren't."

Confusion. "Seen it?"

"Angel and I...we're over. I kinda knew that already, but it's pretty...not deniable now." She anticipated Faith's next words. "Yeah, you scared me, too." The brunette kept her eyes down. "But so has Xander. And Giles. And Willow when she's really focused on something. I even scare myself."

Faith met her eyes, arching a brow. "Sure."

"No, it's true. Everyone's got darkness in them somewhere, but that doesn't make them bad. I know my friends are good people...and that includes you, by the way." Her friend smiled a small smile; she wasn't allowed to forget it. "Angel and I aren't finished cause he scares me...I just can't do it anymore. He doesn't care as much as I thought he did."

"I meant it; he doesn't have a clue what he had. Never shoulda..." She trailed off, before her anger got the better of her.

Buffy blushed. "I wanna know you, Faith. Believe it or not, I like when you're around, and you've got a place here. You know that, don't you?"

"I'm findin' that out." She smirked.

"I'm being serious here."

"I get it, I get it." Her smirk faded into a full-fledged upturning of the lips. "But it's Christmas, B. The other crap'll still be there tomorrow; let's just live it up for now. Snow in Mall-Chick Central; it's a damn miracle. What more could ya want?"

'You? What? Noooo...crazy!'

"I'll ignore that last part...but you're right." The blonde grinned, her mood having done a 180 thanks to the girl next to her. "Better hurry, home and hot chocolate awaits."

Faith almost jumped when she felt a hand grasp hers, but after a second of adjustment, she discovered she liked the fact that Buffy was holding her hand. Once again, they were walking, and Faith the Girl had taken over. What was it about this time of year? The strangest things always happened.

***

When the duo reached the Summers' backyard, there was already a good deal of snow on the ground. Meaning that there was just enough so that they didn't run out of ammo for the snowball fight they'd been having for the past couple blocks. Now that they were in the well-cushioned yard with a blanket of white covering the grass, they could do more than long range attacks.

Cheeks red from the low temperature, Buffy laughed as Faith tried to charge her holding fistfuls of snow, meant to go in her hair. Laughter. She couldn't remember the last time she'd heard it come out of her. Thinking all she had to do was sidestep at the right moment to watch the brunette hit the snow, she didn't consider the possibility that her plan wasn't a big secret. Faith was a slayer, and tuned into the same frequency as Buffy. Which was why the blonde found herself onher back, staring up at the flakes that were tickling her nose.

Then the coldness on her face was replaced by warm breath, as Faith grinned downat her. In that instant, a light switched on in both their heads. Buffy didn'tknow the reason exactly - maybe it was the way her friend's hair was hung down off her face, or the smile that was seemingly meant just for her. Faith didn't either - maybe it was the look of joyfulness in her friend's eyes that she had put there, or the way her hair was sprawled out on the snow.

But whatever the reason, the unexplainable thing that'd nagged them all night, was finally explained. The weirdest part? Neither of them was afraid, and under normal circumstances they would've been, should've been. Buffy had never thought about it before, it wasn't even a question. And Faith, she'd been shown screwed up forms of it her whole life. So why weren't they saying anything, backingoff? Damned if they knew the answer to that.

Hey, it was Christmas. Had to be the air.

"Faith?" The blonde spoke, quietly.

"Yeah, B?"

They were trying to keep it together.

"I..." Buffy watched her breath escape her lips. "I don't think I can feel my fingers." The older slayer waited for the frown of disappointment, and then flipped the younger over, so she was the one sitting on top. "Aw, don't be crestfallen."

Snow had escaped the confinesof her hair, finding its way onto Faith. "Huh?"

"Giles' 'Word-a-Day' calendar - not important. But this..."

Her lips descended to Faith's, and she could feel every part of her body come to life as she was kissed back. She slid down into a laying position as things got more heated; they started to roll, never breaking apart.

"Mm..." They couldn't tell who had been responsible for the noise, but it wasn't like they cared.

What was the thing? What was the light? Love -everything got a hell of a lot less confusing. In the four months that they'd known one another, it had somehow happened without their knowledge, but now it was right in front of them. They knew why they hadn't seen it before; things had been rough to say the least, but that was going to change. It was all new again.

"Faith!" A certain twelve-year-old with bad timing squealed happily, coming running out to greet them. "Mom, they're back!"

"Now her? She's evil." Buffy grumbled, and the person beneath her chuckled. "She'd get along great with that big, cloud of smoke thingy."

The flushed slayers hurriedly ceased what they were doing, stood, and Faith was able to catch the girl, hoisting her up so she could rest on an arm.

"Hiya, Short Stuff." The brunette smiled. "Where were ya before? I come lookin' to hang with my favorite munchkin, and she's missingin action. What's up with that?"

Buffy smiled at the display, andgot winked at.

"Sorry." Dawn looked ashamed. "But Janice's mom was baking cookies before us, so I was over helping. That way -"

"You get double the cookies. Nice work, kiddo; you learn fast. I'm proud."

"Thanks, Faith." The preteen blushed. "Oh, Merry Christmas."

"Fine, just go ahead and ignore your own sister." Buffy's arms went across her chest, and she looked at Faith. "And how come she gets the multiple nicknames, while I get jipped?"

"Cause I'm her favorite." Dawn said, victoriously.

"Favorite *munchkin*." She corrected.

"You're like an inch taller than me!" The little sister stuck her tongue out. "Merry Christmas, Buffy."

The teenage-years were in early bloom.

She shook her head. "Shouldn't you be in bed dreaming about sugar-fairies or something?"

"Yeah, don't wanna tick off Big Red." Faith agreed, stopping herself from laughingat the argument.

"The bubble gum?" She thought it through. "Oh."

"I was, but I couldn't sleep." Dawn said. "I stayed up waiting for you guys, and kinda saw the presents. I think mom's mad...what were you just doing, anyway?"

"Uh, making snow angels. Angels of snow." The blonde stuttered, leaving her partner to cough.

"But -"

"Girls, come inside! You'll catch cold!" Joyce called, interrupting at just the right time.

"You think we can open stuff now?" Dawn wondered hopefully. "It's morning, right?"

"I'll see what I can do." The Bostonian promised, carrying the lightweight into the house with ease.

Buffy was a few steps behind, evaluating what had occurred. Becoming easily distracted by the way in which the other slayer strode through the back door, she knew she wouldn't be able to comprehend or ignore the feelings that had revealed themselves. It was a dangerous place she lived in; wherever they went, they went, and she had no complaints. So she shrugged, grateful to have someone like Faith there for her, and followed them into the warmth.

***

It was two in the afternoon when Faith awoke on the living room couch, spooned around Buffy. She was holding onto her; the person who never held onto to anything, was holding onto someone contentedly. Even the part of her that would've been out the door hours agohad fallen into line. They hadn't screwed, only kissed. One amazing, knockout kiss, which she wasn't the instigator of. Buffy had done it, and she merely followed. What was happening to her, damn it?

Before they were interrupted, she knew she'd never felt anything like that. It overrode all her normal functions. Oh, she was turned on, but there was a force stronger than even her rampant hormones at work. Love. She knew what it really was for the first time in her life. And not just for Buffy - for her family, too. The pint-size who appeared to think she was the coolest thing ever, the mom who had treated her like a daughter from day one...still, it always came back to the blonde.

The blonde who had not just invited her to her house, but when they were opening gifts, also invited her to move in. It was put to a vote, which was unanimous. She had sat there, stupefied. Not even she was cynical enough to stay blind to the fact that she had stumbled into a good thing. It didn't make sense - she *was* supposed to be a worthless, fuck up, after all - yet it was what it was. She didn't want to jump to any conclusions in case she was setting herself up for a letdown, but it looked like she was now a member of a family. How quickly her luck had reversed.

Those wholesome ones with the nice, safe places she saw on TV. Okay, so Sunnydale wasn't safe; the imagery was right, though. Except that in television, you'd never see the straight-laced, teenage daughter making out with the bad seed. They'd be friends because it wouldn't work out, or nothing at all, and then you'd get that corny ending at the close of the half-hour. Plus, the girl/girl thing? If they ever put that on TGIF, the world would turn on its head. Hers had, that was for sure. Her view of the way things worked had been totally reshaped.

What she had trouble believing, was that Buffy would love her *that* much...but how could she deny it? It took them a fast forty-five minutes to open gifts, and then Joyce had gone upstairs to get some sleep before she had to cook dinner. Soon after, Dawn had gone to her room to play (how the girl had energy leftwas a mystery), and then she and Buffy had tested her new PlayStation (the family's gift to her) for a while, with random breaks for kissing. Happiness; the room was filled with it, and she was inside taking part. Eventually, they had fallen asleep, her not trying anything.

During that entire span of time, the way Buffy looked at her, the way she kept finding excuses to touch her arm or her shoulder or her hand, said it all. The kissing could have been a strictly physical thing - with that other stuff, it was a bonus. Faith wasn't good at that kind of subtlety, so having the other slayer entangled was her direct way of passing along the message, that yeah, she loved her back. It wasn't simply the holiday's doing; Buffy had this pull to her she couldn't escape, and because she could finally pinpoint it...

Well, her main focus had switched from figuring out the puzzle, to keeping the puzzle together. Either she wasn't as bad as she passed herself off to be, or Buffy had lost her mind.

'This is your chance, Faith. You got what you wanted- you screw it up, it'll be cause you try to, and not cause of anything else.For once, do yourself a favor? Don't question it, just ride.'

Movement, there was definite movement. Somebody was being booted from the land of dreams. Which is what she'd had instead of nightmares, except that no dream could top this.

"You up?" Faith prodded gently.

The yawned response and the pushing back of the tiny form into a more snug position almost made her want to break down and buy a Hallmark card. She had to get a grip.

"Don't wanna be." Buffy mumbled sleepily. "I was...uh, I don't remember what I was doing, but it was nice." Faith smirked, though her partner couldn't see. "Oh. Never mind - whatever it was, this is better."

The brunette had to stop blushing. "You really..." She paused. "...want...?"

"What, you?" The blonde adjusted herself so she was able to turn her head and look the younger slayer in the face. "I don't go kissing all willy-nilly, you know."

"But ...you know my rep. And with Angel..."

Faith wasn't listening to what the rest of her was saying; she had to be sure they both knew how things could go from the start, because she couldn't promise anything. Except to try and do right, and trying didn't really count for much.

"What happened to 'the other crap'll still be there tomorrow'? Can't follow your own advice?"

"Guess not."

She cast her eyes elsewhere, only to have Buffy put a hand on her cheek and force her to stay focused.

"Faith, did you kiss me back just so you could say you did it?"

"No way." The responsewas immediate. "That wasn't why...I'd never...not with you, B."

"Then what's the problem?" Buffy sat up, as did Faith, who kept one, protective arm around her. "You wouldn't still be here if you didn't care, and if I wantedto be with Angel, your arm wouldn't be where it is."

The Bostonian looked, just realizing where it was resting. "How's this work?"

She shrugged. "Beats me. There's no manual, so...no idea." Then she grinned. "Even if there was, I probably..."

"Wouldn't readit." They finished together, and laughed.

The brunette had unraveled another part of the mystery.

"Ever since 'Psycho Watcher Lady,' you're all I've been thinking about, and I couldn't figure out why. It was crazy, lacking of sense. First I thought I just felt guilty for hurting you, and I didn't know how to fix it. I blew it. Info got mixed, the gang suddenly became 'Vampires Anonymous'..." She looked down. "Anyway, I'm sorry.

"Then um...whatever time it was eight or nine hours ago, it clicked. I wanna be with you, cause, funny thing, it turns out that I love you. And that...well, that's not so crazy sounding, actually." She smiled, looking up. "You got to me, and I didn't see it coming. It was sneaky; this kinda stuff usually is, but we'lldeal together. Hey, we *are* the Chosen Two, right?"

That sealed itfor Faith. Wherever the chips were going to fall, she didn't care at the moment; she was in love with Buffy Summers, and wasn't planning on holding back. Her mouth practically crushed the one belonging to her petite...girlfriend? Yeah, girlfriend worked. Buffy fell back onto the couch, her arms encircling Faith's neck, pulling her closer, as their oral exploration became more involved. Dark and light merged; there was something to be said for synergy.

"Damn right we are." Faith said raggedly, pulling away. "I love you, Buffy."

"I noticed." They smiled. "Which is good, cause now I don't look like a dork."

"Dork? Nah. Only when you snore." She grinned, getting to her feet, her back facing the other slayer.

"Snore?Why I oughta..." Buffy said incredulously, and then jumped on her girlfriend's back.

Faith ran with it, grabbing a leg with each hand and holding her in place, as they headed into the kitchen. Buffy's arms were around the Bostonian's neck again so she didn't fall off, and she screamed because herride chose to wait until the last minute to duck; she almost hit her head. In the kitchen, Joyce was trying to get dinner ready with Giles. It must have been later than they thought.

"Got a wide load here. Need some room." Faith announced.

"When I get down, you're in trouble. With a capital T."

"And you're heavy with a capital H. Made your choice - live with it."

"What's going on?" Buffy asked the adults, defeated and scared that the brunette would allow gravity to take over. "What time is it?"

"It's just past two, and I'm helping your mother with the food." Giles answered with a smile, not knowing what to make of the slayers' positions, but amused by them "Everyone's out back with Dawn, ah, building something resembling a snowman."

"I don't think she slept. I tried telling her that she's going to be tired later, but it probably just went in one ear and out the other." Joyce smiled at the pair, too.

"That will happen with children." Her cooking assistant said. "I've had numerous, similar experiences."

Both girls gave him a look.

"We were wondering when you were going to get up. How's Angel?"

"Fine." Buffy said, with nothing else to add.

Giles and Joyce raised their eyebrows at that, and returned to what they were doing. Having Faith stay with them was a great idea. She liked her, Dawn had grown attached to her, and the motel was filthy. There was no question; all that the girl needed to see was that she was cared for. She would fit in just fine, the mother in her knew. Buffy needed to spend more time with her as well - really get to know her and befriend her - it looked like that was already starting.

"Is it me, or have we had the strangest weather?" Joyce remarked after several moments of silence, still feeling slightly uncomfortable around the watcher.

Conversation didn't come easy, but her daughter was right. It would've been rude not to invite him.

"Yes, it has been rather strange, hasn't it?" He agreed. "Quite, uh, seasonal, though."

"It's very beautiful." She added. "Girls, if you're going out..." But she realized they were gone, and shook her head. "Why do I bother?"

***

The snow had settled down, changing back into flurries over the past hour. It wasn't going to melt any time soon, though.The gang was rolling up the final ball that would be the snowman's head when the duo came to join them, wearing everything from jackets, to mittens and scarves.The blonde and the brunette obviously weren't appropriately dressed for the occasion.

"I think we're supposed to be more winter-y."

"Relax, B, you're covered. I'll keep you nice and warm."

"Hi, Buff, Faith. Merry Christmas." Xander quirked an eyebrow, watching as Buffy hopped off of Faith, her face red. "Big shock, it's actually white for a change."

"Uh huh, sorta picked up on that, Xand, but thanks for filling us in."

"Yeah, what would we do without ya?"

He coughed. "So...what was with the horseback? New training technique?"

"No, she just had it coming."

Faith grabbed her partner by the waist, forcing her to lean back into her. "What do I have comin' to me now?"

"Uh, lots of fun things, I'm sure." Buffy's voice was low, revenge not on her mind any longer. "Definitely warm. Flannel's way overrated."

This got the attention of all three friends, after they placed the head on the snowman's body. They were close. Too close. Dawn was searching the yard for broken branches that could be used as arms; they already had a carrot for a nose, and rocks for eyes. She wouldn't have known what they were seeing, anyway. Xander was about to get a little bit poorer - he handed the guitarist and the redhead his wallet.

"You win. Happy?" He said as they raided his money supply. "It could've been just a slayer thing, you know."

"Butit wasn't." The amateur witch said.

"And what happens the one time I try to go for maturity?"

"You get burned." Oz said.

"Exactly!" He exclaimed. "Well, lesson learned. No gambling or growing up for me. Man, I'd get killed in Vegas. Literally, cause with my luck, I'd probably owe some guy they call 'Little Joey'."

"Shoot for Never-Never Land, then."

"Hello, pirates?"

"Hmm. Valid concern."

He'd have to call Cordelia when she got back from vacation; they were broken up, but he was obligated to fork over his share.She was the one responsible, and it wasn't fair that she could still bleed him dry.

"They didn't." Buffy said in disbelief.

"I think they did." Faith countered, thinking it to be rather perceptive of them.

"Did you?" She noticed how her friends wouldn't look herin the eye. "You did, didn't you?"

"Are you?" Willow asked innocently. "I mean...did what? Uh oh." Stupid, stupid! "Snow's pretty cool, isn't...itwas all Cordelia!" She had to whisper because Dawn was nearby. "She saw you training in the library that time, and it was just a silly bet..." She laughed nervously. "See? Silly! I thought she was joking, so we...for fun only...not that we make a profit off of your love life, cause we never usually...but-but then there was the talking and the double meanings with the teasing and the grinning and the touching where you don't normally touch a 'just a friend' type person...andthe smiling and the hot...err...sweat. No, uh, not hot sweat! Sweaty heat! Oh, uh, not that either! And...I should really just shut up before you hit me. But...Hanukkah spirit, remember?"

She closed her eyes real tight, humming a mix between 'Joy to the World' and 'The Dreidel Song.' They were open again when she heard laughter. Buffy and Faith were doubled over, and Dawn had to come find out what was going on.

"What's so funny?"

Faith, once she regained her composure, winked at the hacker. "Tell her, Red."

"I can't!" Willow screeched. "I-I-I..."

"Whatever." The young brunette shrugged. "I shouldatold my mom to stop giving you hot chocolate."

"I think that would've been a good idea, Dawn." Buffy agreed, sending both her and Faith back into hysterics.

***

On the dining room table was a large bowl of mashed potatoes, a bowl of peas, a basket of croissant rolls, a plate of carrots and corn on their cobs, string beans, and a gravy boat. The slayerswere paired on the right side next to Dawn, with the sometimes werewolf and witch on the left side, separated by Xander. Willow sat across from the youngest Summers, Faith was across from Xander, and Buffy was across from Oz. They all had plates in front of them, and the appropriate utensils.

Dawn was fighting her biological need for sleep, even with the noise. It was Christmas; if she slept, it'd be gone by the time she woke up. She couldn't...no, she *wouldn't* succumb! She watched with interest as both Xander and Faith each took a peafrom the bowl, daring the other to make a move. The slayer loaded hers onto a spoon - he was quick to do the same. This was tense for her, because she liked thema lot, and she'd have to like whoever scored the first hit, more. Her life was full of hard choices.

Buffy had stayed on top of the situation, knowing that they would have to face major parental wrath if they were caught while launching eatable projectiles at one another. When Faith reached for the spoon handle, she laid her hand over the brunette's and briefly shook her head. Faith shrugged, tossed the pea up in the air, and it landed in her mouth just as Giles and Joyce came in with the chicken. Xander hadn't been able to recover.

Joyce's finely tuned mother's eye was drawn to the misplaced pea that he had prepared, as the librarian put the well-cooked bird on the table. He picked it up, turning it in between his fingers. Seeing that she continued to stare, he returned it to the spot that it had held in the bowl. Dawn was glad she didn't have to choose; her sister was good to have aroundat times.

"I was inspecting it, that's all. It's a quality, nutritious morsel, Mrs. Summers. Who knew she was such a conscientious shopper?"

"Too slow." Faith smirked.

"You might wanna trying laying it on just a little bit thicker." Buffy advised him, teasingly.

The adults took their seats, and the eating commenced. Grace was skipped out of respect for Willow's Jewish-ness, even though she volunteered to go sit in a corner, fingers in her ears, while it was said. Faith couldn't have asked for anything better than this, and Buffy could see thatby the look in her eyes. The odd mix of people that comprised their family, made every second of dinner count - talking, joking and enjoying the peace of itall. These were rare moments.

It would be interesting to see where the super girls went. The blonde was happy about the way things were turning out, and she'd make sure her new girlfriend experienced everything that hadn't been available to her before. Faith was unlike anyone she'd ever met; the other slayer lived by a different philosophy, but she was a member now, and hers.The Bostonian didn't mind; she had claimed Buffy Summers the instant she'd sized her up outside the Bronze months ago.

Amidst the holiday cheer and gazes of adoration, no one noticed that Dawn had lost her battle with the Sandman. Well, that was until the girl couldn't hold her head up any longer, and was face down in her mashed potatoes. For what seemed like an endless second, they all stared at the sight in confusion. Then suppressed laughter came out in brief, muffled bursts; there was an occasional snort, too. Joyce eventuallytook control.

"Buffy, wake up your sister." She said, unable to keep her _expression_ serious.

"Why? She looks so comfortable."

The younger slayer assumed the task, shaking Dawn slightly. "C'mon, squirt. Rise and shine."

The twelve-year-old bolted upright, her face covered in mashed potatoes.

"What?" She saw the looks they were giving her, and whined when they didn't fill her inon the big secret. "What? No, really, what? Seriously...what?! Guys!"

As the unrestrained laughter began, Faith thought she finally knew just what the hell 'Tis the Season' meant.

FIC: Christmas (A.K.A. Tis the Season) - Buffy/Faith