Re: MEMO: United Vegetable Empire

[Tater <tater@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

MEMO
TO: Director of Public Safety
FROM: The United Vegetable Empire
SUBJECT: Roaming band of broccoli with cheese graters


Rest assured, we don't trust the broccoli with a working flintlock either.
Heck, we don't trust those guys with a working nerf gun. Last time they got
ahold of a nerf gun, it took us over a year to repair all the damage to the
Imperial Palace and we still haven't found that one missing toilet. In the
interest of the continued survival of life on this planet, we have replaced
all the gunpowder for the flintlock with black pepper, and the flint with a
very old piece of cheese. The worst they can do with it is make themselves
sneeze. We hope.

They shouldn't be starting any riots with their current endeavours. If you
have any trouble with them, I suggest shouting "Ripper went that way!" and
pointing toward the Demonic Cabbage Patch. That should keep any incidents
contained within the cabbage patch. That's why we built all those
electrified fences, broken-glass topped walls and lead shields around the patch.

As for those reporters from the Sunnydale Muckraker, we're not sure how they
found out about the conspiracy, but the algae boys, with support from some
very sneaky piles of wet leaves, have been dispatched to deal with the
problem. They won't be bothering you again.


tater (Vegetables of the world unite!)
Head: The United Vegetable Empire