Ficlet: Phone Conversation In Rome

["ebailey140" <ebailey140@xxxxxxx>]

Title:  Phone Conversation In Rome
Writer:  E
Email:  Ebailey140@xxxxxxx
Rating:  PG-13
Disclaimer:  Same people own all these characters that were 
mentioned the first couple of times.
Spoilers:  Various BtVS episodes.
Summary:  Following Conversation In Rome and Complications In Rome.  
Willow's visiting Buffy and Dawn.  Buffy and Willow are both single, 
and Dawn wants to do something about that, and take care of her 
sister's tensions at the same time.  Willow didn't think Dawn's 
suggestion of sensual massages was a good idea, since she thought 
Buffy was straight.  Dawn explained that Buffy's been romantically 
involved with women, before.  This didn't prove to be as helpful as 
Dawn hoped, though, considering who Buffy's ex-girlfriend is...


Willow walks into room, and sees Dawn on the phone...

Dawn:  Yeah, it's gotten a little complicated...  Oh, here's Willow, 
now...  Willow!  (hands her phone)  It's Xander!

Willow:  (taking phone)  Hey, you!

Xander:  Hey you, yourself.  How's my favorite red haired witch?

Willow:  Slightly wigged, right now, actually.  How are you?

Xander:  I'm in England.  Just got back with a bunch of new 
Slayers.  They're a handful.

Willow:  I can imagine...  How was Africa?

Xander:  Exotic, hot...  Kinda smelly, in some parts...  Dog doo is 
nothing compared to elephant doo.  Andrew asked if I found King 
Solomon's mines.

Willow:  Figures...

Xander:  I mean, how stupid can you get?  Everyone knows the mines 
were buried in lava!  And before you ask, no, I didn't run into any 
jungle lords, either.  But, what's got my Willow so wigged?

Willow:  Buffy.

Xander:  Ah...  Well, spill.

Willow:  This is going to sound like a strange question, but...  You 
know Buffy as well as I do...

Xander:  Yes, she loves you.  We just need to keep her away from her 
necrophelic tendencies.  

Willow:  I know...  She loves me as a friend...  And in full 
agreement on the vampire thing...

Xander:  Will...

Willow:  But, my question...  It's...  OK...  It's going to sound a 
bit weird...  Unbelievable...

Xander:  Willow, we grew up on a Hellmouth.  It takes a lot to be 
weird or unbelievable to me.

Willow:  OK...  Then...  Um...  Back in Senior Year...  Did you know 
Buffy and Faith had a, um, relationship?  I don't mean a Slayer 
bonding relationship...  Though I suppose it could be called 
that...  But a...  um...  making sweet love kinda relationship?  

Xander:  More like wild, intense, rough love that breaks the 
furniture in their case, but, yeah.  Didn't everyone?

Willow:  Not...  everyone.  Wait!  You KNEW?!!!

Xander:  Well, it was kind of obvious...

Willow:  How was it obvious?!!!  And why didn't you tell me?!!

Xander:  I thought you knew!  You didn't act surprised when I said 
they were getting sweaty in the Library.

Willow:  I thought...  I figured they were working out and you were 
just doing your usual innuendo that you do about everything...  
Though I guess they were working out in a way...

Xander:  Yeah, but they didn't work out.

Willow:  Huh?  Look, I'm not up to clever wordplay at the moment.  
Um, did Giles know?

Xander:  Well, he was their Watcher.  What do you think?  Oz knew, 
too.  Wolf senses...

Willow:  OZ KNEW?!!!  GRRRR!!!!  

Xander:  Um, Will, you're not turning black haired and veiny again, 
are you?

Willow:  No, no...  Not yet, anyway...  So you, Giles, Oz, AND Dawn 
knew.  

Xander:  And Cordy.

Willow:  ARRRRGH!!!  Am I the ONLY one who didn't see it?!!

Xander:  No, no...  Angel was oblivious.  Somehow, he never figured 
out what was going on, there.

Willow:  Great.  I'm as oblivious as Angel...

Xander:  Hey, he was in love with Buffy, so he blocked out what he 
didn't WANT to see.

Willow:  So, what was MY excuse?

Xander:  Think about it.

Willow:  But...  I was with Oz... I didn't think of girls that way, 
then.  I didn't think of Buffy that way...

Xander:  Yet, you and Faith kept getting into...  whatever the 
female equivelent is of a pissing contest over her.

Willow:  Yeah, but...  No...

Xander:  Why do you think I stopped pursuing her?  I saw the way she 
looked at you, the way you looked at her...  The way she always told 
you she loved you before giving you a big hug...  Or rolling around 
on the ground with you...  I knew I didn't have a chance, with 
either of you.  Unless you two would like to prove me wrong, of 
course.

Willow:  Um...  At least tell me Wes didn't know?

Xander:  From the moment he saw them together.

Willow:  Damn...




"It's a good fight, Buffy, and I want in."
"I kinda love you."
Buffy & Willow, 'Choices'

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