Fic:(Repost) Prisms-Red 2/2

[Mad-Hamlet@xxxxxxx]

With a put upon sigh I ease out and let the two girls, still 
holding hands I notice, past. All four of them turn as one and head 
for the entrance. I sit back down and kill my drink. Reach over and 
kill Red's too. 

Ugh..mental note: Eat the bartender. 

**

Why am I here? I said I wanted to find them and I thought I 
did at the time. But now..now they're right here! Ok not 'right here' 
right here but about twenty feet away. Inside that..place. We've been 
waiting for nearly half an hour. It's dark here. Lots off alleyways 
twisting around to meet here. Perfect hunting grounds, it's too bad I 
don't feel anything like a hunter. 

It's so dark. I'm beginning to wonder if the sun will ever 
come back. 

They're right here! And I can ..I can.. no..No don't think 
about it. Can't think about it, won't think about..cloth..tearing 
and..how my throat is sore from screaming and how..I .hurt..and?
I'm 
thinking about it. 
Stop.

Think about..yeah..think about Buffy. She's safe to think 
about. Big, strong, Slayer Buffy. She's gonna kick their butts 
and..make em' hurt and..make em' um..hurt some more
and..how..how..how 
that'll not make anything better. Cause she's not big strong Buffy. 
She's hurting too, she thinks she failed somehow but ..she has to 
understand ... How can she understand when I don't even understand. 

Xander, poor Xander he's trying so hard to be strong. I can 
tell he's feeling abandonded and we..I don't mean to do that. I just 
need..some..thing..time maybe. Just..get..something or..maybe..I
DON'T 
KNOW!! I hugged him, I hugged him and tried to forgive him for 
something he had nothing to do with and it's just not working I 
can't..I can't?why can't I? 

I don't know, I don't know..all I know..my Truth..keep that..I 
know my Truth. They didn't kill it, they didn't kill it..it's 
there..just..have to wait a little longer that's all. I can feel it 
inside me..warm..patient. I became strong enough for this truth, no 
matter the consequences once, I can do it again. I just need..just 
need.. I still don't know. 

Buffy's behind me. Arms wrapped around my shoulders, my own 
hands holding her forearms like a brace. She's warm too. My Truth and 
My Slayer. Both really warm?wonder ..I wonder when I'll be able
to 
share the Truth?

Spike whispers from the behind the corner we're standing 
behind. "They're coming."

They're coming! They're coming and they're going to get me and 
I'm gonna be screaming and and ..they're gonna tear 
off..and..gonna..and..Buffy squeezes me tighter. 

"You're safe Willow" She whispers in my ear. "Remember my 
promise? We're going to get them now and you can just watch and if
you 
like, make suggestions okay? You okay with that?" 

I nod dumbly, there's a scream loged in my throat..a stillborn 
scream and it's stuck!

I swallow..and I swallow again..

"What.." I croak. "What now?"

Giles step forward and almost..almost puts his hand on my 
shoulder. "Now me." Is all he says before stepping around the corner.

There's silence for a few moment..I want to look..I 
do..really..I do..I wanna see..but..I turn and nestle in Buffy's 
embrace instead.

Coward.

Spike steps forward. "Now going to watch Red?" He asks. 
I shake my head.
	
He shrugs. "Your perogative I suppose. I for one am not going 
to miss this." And he vanishes around the corner as well.

Not gonna watch, nope?I can still hear though.

"Excuse me gentlemen." That's Giles.

"..eh?"

I hear them..hear them! 
Ohmygodohmygod..recognisethatvoiceneverforgetthatvoicetellingmegonnaki
llmenevergonnaforgetnever
Forgetgottarungottahide! 
Notsafeherenotsafegottaggeeetttttaawwwwaaaayyyy!!!

Buffy?won't let anything happen. She's safe..a 
harbor..safe..still wanna run. Hear hammering against my ribs..she
can 
probably feel it. I turn my head and look at her. She smiles at me 
with her eyes. 

"You're ok." She whispers. Kisses me on my forehead again. 
Yeah..yeah I'm okay..still wanna run.

"..what ya say ol' man?"

"Um..I seem to need an answer to a question. Could you help 
me?"

"Fuggof ol' man can't..right now..get outta da way.."

"Oh it's really a simple question. Please..I'll pay you for 
your time."

"Don' need no money. Geddoudda way."

"Nah, nah, let him speak...whatz yer question? We be happy to 
help."

"Do you know what the word 'No' means?"

"What?"

"Huh?"

Sound of fist meeting flesh. Some scuffling, a muffled scream. 
Another blow..I shudder.

"No." Giles again. "A negative response or a denial." 
More sounds of scuffling, someones trying to run away. A loud 
grunt and now someone is making these deep gasping moans. 

"Middle English variant of non, from Old English, none: ne, 
not." 

Another smacking sound, breath whistling from lungs, someones 
screaming..

"My nose, my nose, you froke my frukin' nose!"

"Used to express refusal, denial.." Someone is beating someone 
else against the wall, sounds like a pumpkin being hit by a baseball 
bat. "disbelief, emphasis, or disagreement!" Giles is shouting now
and 
I can still hear the sounds of someone beating someone else to death. 

There's silence for a while..just the sounds of heavy 
breathing. And some moaning noises. 
Giles walks around the corner a few moments later. His hair is 
slightly mussed but other than that he looks fine. He's grinning a 
little. 

He reaches into the break pocket of his shirt and fishes out 
his glasses. Putting them on he inspects the knuckles on his left
hand 
where already a nasty bruise is already forming. 

"That is really going to hurt in the morning." He says. 
"Xander, your turn."

Xander only nods and steps around the corner. Buffy is still 
holding me. 

"..ey..hey man who are..what the hell ..what..AARGGH!!" 

"Put my ..my..frien..OOFF!"

And that's all I hear for the next few minutes. Xander isn't 
saying anything, he's silent as he dishes out his punishment. Just 
heavy breathing and sounds of fighting..well..not fighting more like 
just a one sided beating. 

He comes back around the corner just as silently. I can see 
one of his hands are covered in blood. He notices where I'm looking. 
"It's mine." He explains. "Caught one of their teeth."

I nod..can feel a whimper coming.. I've never seen Xander like 
this. Never seen a Xander like this before. He..he scares me. I don't 
want to be scared of him..why did this happen? Where is my funny,
soft 
Xander? Where did the dark scary one come from and how do I get him
to 
go away? 

I guess he can see it 'cause his eyes soften and he gives me 
one of his infamous 'Hey, it's me' grins. 
I ..smile back..kinda. Then he looks over my shoulder at Buffy. His 
smile went away.

He nods and says "Your turn." 
	
Buffy begins to unwrap her arms from around me and I grab at 
them.

"Don't go! Don't go!" I say breathlessly.

"Shh..shhh..it's ok..I'll be right back. Xander and Giles will 
be here, you'll be safe. I'll be right back." Her tone of voice 
chances from soft to steel. "I just want to see."
I look at Xander and Giles who simply standing there, in the 
dark. I should feel safe with them and before tonight I never would 
think otherwise but now..now? I don't want to hurt them though,
don't 
want to hurt them again I mean. 

So I lie.

"I..I want to see too."

She pauses again and looks at me for a few very scary seconds. 
"Okay."

Buffy?

With her hands in mine we walk around the corner together. I 
get to see them..for the first time I really get to see them. 

One is hunched on the ground sobbing, curled up with his hands 
protecting his groin. Guess Xander ..decided to focus there. The
other 
is wobbling about, using a nearby brick wall to support himself with 
one arm. His face is a bloody mess. One eye has already swollen shut 
and blood runs freely from his nose. 

Oh yeah, Spike is leaning against a far wall..just watching.

"I have to let you go now okay?" Buffy asks. I nod.

She slowly releases my hands, she has to manually unwrap my 
fingers from her own 'cause it seems they won't listen to me. I wrap 
my arms around myself in a poor substitute for one of her own hugs. 
Spike looks over at me and nods slowly..I just hug myself tighter and 
try and watch. 

She doesn't say anything either. Just drags the one on the 
ground to his feet and pulls him after her as she goes after the one 
still trying to drunkenly stagger away. He looks over his shoulder
and 
tries to break into a run but she's on him already. 

She's grabbed them each by their throats now and has them 
pinned against the wall. A streetlight is casting shadows over all
off 
them. She's choking them, I can see her knuckles getting whiter and 
whiter..she's strong enough to snap their necks but she's dragging 
this out. Making it slow.

Their feet are scrabling madly against the wall and their 
hands clawing at her wrists, seeking purchase..but ..already they're 
getting weaker..she's choking them and choking them..and..

Her face. Her beautiful, warm, face it's..gone. The light is 
stark across her features. Cheeks are shallow and drawn like she's on 
the last bits of strength. Her eyes are wild..furious..I can see 
insanity warring there and ..and she's lost. Tears are running down 
her face but she doesn't wipe them away just keeps squeezing tighter 
and tighter?they're hardly struggling at all now.

Behind them all Spike is slowly applauding.

I can't let this happen! I can't!

"Buffy!!" I scream.

She doesn't seem to hear me for a moment but then..then her 
head slowly turns toward me..and I can really see her eyes. Lost,
sad, 
hating eyes..hating themselves..sad..so sad eyes..

She smiles, a warm loving smile meant for newborn babies or 
soft kitty cats nestled against your cheek. I have never seen
anything 
so horrible in my life. 

"I'm sorry Willow." She says softly at me. Still smiling. "I 
know what I said back in the dorm but..I'm sorry." 

I'm not fooled by what she's saying. 

She's not apologising.

She's saying goodbye.

Won't lose her..will not! Will not let these 
two..two..ASSHOLES destroy my family! Not when we've faced the kinds 
of hell that would have thousand of them screaming in place waiting
to 
be shredded!

I will not!
I WILL NOT!!

"Buffy!" I shout. Not screaming..shouting. She ignores me, 
she's turned back to watching her two friends..watching them for that 
last light to flee. 

"Buffy! My Truth!" I shout again. 

She's looking at me! She can see me..gotta do it..gotta do 
it..remember Rosenberg, no matter what happens, it's better this way. 

"My Truth is for you.." I say. Spikes stopped applauding. "My 
Truth.." and I'm walking toward her slowly, arms stretched out in 
front of me..hey..I'm crying again.

When did that start?

"My Truth is..Buffy..My Truth is?I love you Buffy."

She just stands there for a second. She's got this little 
crease between her eyes. That always happesn when she's confused. Her 
head cocks to the side slighly. I can't help but giggle a little. She 
looks so cute this way?without the two ..things..half dead
against the 
wall of course.

"I love you Buffy." I say again. "Love..you."

"Willow.." She gasps.

And she lets them go.

**

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!!

What the HELL is going on? 

I came out here to watch a good bit of vengence, some 
bloodplay, a little hunting and hopefully cold blooded murder. Not 
some procolmation of forbiden love.

Giles was great, beat the tar out of the too little snots and 
his speech was kinda funny too. Xander, now that I did not expect.
The 
boy was glorious, so good in fact that when I get this chip out of my 
head I'm seriously considering turning the little shit. Never
expected 
him to be the quiet type and what a viscious knee..used it like a
pro. 
Cheap shots all the way. Bravo. Five stars.

The Slayer seemed to be doing fine too, just..killing the 
fuckers slow. A worthwhile endevor that I was really enjoying and
then 
the Witch here has to go and get a bad case of morals.
Is every power in universe bent on ruining my fun?

Now they're kneeling in front of each, crying, sobbing?holding 
each others faces wearing the biggest, dumbest grins..at least
they're 
not kissing. I can feel my stomach clenching..if this keeps up I
might 
be the first vampire in the history of the world to puke. 

Right. Plan B then.

I put my fingers between my teeth and whistle.

**

Well. 
Xander seems to be handling that little announcement pretty 
well. He's just standing there with this very inane smile on his face.

I can't say I'm all that surprised. Combat stress on 
relationships has been known to cause sudden..shifts. Not to say that 
she wouldn't have anyway. And what buisness of it is mine anyway? I 
can only be there, be supportive..be a father. 

And keep Xander from saying anything stupid.

I take off my glasses and rub my nose. Life just got much more 
complicated.
**

Of course..why didn't I see it before? I'm not being left out 
I'm just not..um..let's not go there.

Alright, I'm shocked and not all of it has sunk in probably. 
But..what the hell, they're my friends right? So..whatever makes her 
happy. I guess. Part of my mine is kicking up a storm, saying it's 
wrong or some other stupid shit, I squash it. Another part is
suddenly 
getting many odd ideas. I..don't squash that one but I sure as hell
am 
not talking about it. 

Oh my God! I have to get this leer of my face somehow or Buffy 
will KILL me!
**

Did she..she did. 

Wow..I mean..just wow..I never would have guessed. I don't 
know what to say..I don't even think I have the capacity for 
speech..how'd I get here anyway? A second ago I was choking two
people 
to death..Willow says she loves me and now I'm on my knees in front
of 
her and we're both crying. But I have no recolection of how I got
from 
point 'A' to point 'B'. 

Weird. 

I mean..that was..brave of her..and..she saved me. I could 
feel myself slipping away as I killed them. Losing myself,
gone..never 
would have been who I had been before. I knew all this but it didn't 
stop me. I couldn't stop. 

But she saved me. Willow saved me. My friend saved me..

My friend..and maybe something more.

I'm not quite sure yet. Have to think about it and feel about 
it but..right now I'm safe. 

We both are.

Who's whistling?

**

The two vampires melt out of the shadows behind Buffy. I see 
them she doesn't. But when my eyes widen in horror she whips around 
and is on her feet. I can see her hand reaching for a stake..which
she 
doesn't have. 

This is bad. 

"Ease back Slayer." Spike says coming off the wall. "They're 
not here for you."

"Spike. When?"

"In the bar, while getting the beer."

"Why?"

"Oh..I don't know, I suppose just in case anyone here went all 
Chicken Belly on me. I didn't come here for vengence Summers, I came 
here for the entertainment value and one or the other I will be have 
my satisfaction. I paid my dues, putting up with your company and I 
want my moneys worth."

He turns to the two vamps, game faces on all the way. 
"Cafaterias behind you boys." He says pointing with a figure. "Chow 
down."

The two vamps approach the fallen figures of 
my..attack?..I..of?my?rapists. 

The two men are starting to recover, both are rubbing at their 
throats one swearing endlessly the other crying. I can relate..I know 
how it feels to cry. I think I'll be knowing for a while. They're
kind 
of lucky..they'll not worry about tears after the next?

Both of them manage to get a glimpse of what's coming. 

The crying one just starts crying louder as the one vamp grabs 
his head, exposes the neck and sinks it's fangs in. I think he's 
calling for his mother.

The other?

"fuck..fuck..Fuck..Fuck..FUCK FUCK FUUUCCCCKKKK!!!!"

Xander and Giles have come around the corner by now, we're all 
just watching these two vampires feed. No one says anything, I reach 
out and grab Buffy's hands. I'm still on my knees. She reaches back 
blindly and grabs on to me. 

I've seen vamps feed before, most of the time it's gentle..in 
it's own way. Usually the expression of terror on the victims slowly 
fades away for something..else. This is not like that. This is ugly. 
The vampires are not really draining them, they're tearing the blood 
from the men's bodies. 
	
I can see their throats bob with every swallow and under the 
harsh light of the streetlamp I can see their pale skin aquiring a 
slight pinkish tinge. The men's eyes keep bulging out, bigger and 
bigger but their jaws are slack, one's tounge is hanging out of his 
mouth..like a slug.

I can't help but wonder if that's the same tounge that was 
sliding all ove?No!

"That's enough boys." Spike says and reaches into his pocket. 
He pulls out a silver object and with a few deft flicks of his wrist 
the blade of a butterfly knife gleams in the darkness. 
"Let's have those wrists."

One of the vamps throws aside his ..'meal.'

"Screw you Chip boy! I don't want no minions or childe, I'm 
still hungry and I'm changing the deal. The redhead looks
yummy?step 
aside."

"Jee." Spike says. "Chip Boy..how original." He tosses a look 
at Xander who just shakes his head.
	
"Bad move fangy." Xander mutters. 

He's right.

Spike puts his hand through the vampires chest, ripping out his heart 
which explodes into dust a split second before the rest of the vamp 
follows. 

"YES!" Spike cheers. "I finally got to kill something!"
	
He turns to the remaining vamp.

"Well?"

He..it..whatever..holds out a wrist which Spike slices open. 
Then grabbing the bleeding limb Spike forces it over the slack jaws
of 
my two assialints. Assailints..I think I can live with that word?

A few drops fall into their mouths before Spike pushes the 
vamp away. 

"That's enough. Get outta here before the Slayer here gets 
over her new found love affair and remember all that destiny crap."

The vamp snarls at Spike who simply examines his nails for 
dust particles. The vamp runs away. 
Smart vampire, Buffy'll have to track that one down.

Spike walks over to us. 

"There." He says. "Problem solved. Wait a few days and you can 
kill them without any issues regarding morality bouncing around in 
that pretty head of yours."

"You're still a pig Spike." Buffy says.

"Oink, oink Slayer. I'm feeling to good right now to be 
bothered by your verbal jabs." He crouches down on the balls of his 
feet beside me. 

"Normally Red I'd be crowing to the moon about how enjoyable 
it was being involved in something regarding human suffering. I like 
it, I can't help it and I won't apologise for it. But there are some 
things even I won't advocate. Yes, I'm a predator and darn well proud 
of it but it's for food mostly and if I ying and yang my prey about 
for a bit so much the better, makes it more spicy but there is a line 
I will not cross." 

He idly chucks my chin very lightly with the knuckles of one hand and 
I can feel Buffy stiffen.

"You'll be okay." He says.

He stands up.

"And in case you're wondering why I really helped you?"
Spike goes away and his demon comes out, "It's because you 
..are?MINE!"

And just as quick it's gone.

He smiles cheekily. "Just kidding." And he walks away into the gloom 
of the allyways though his voice drifts to us from the darkness. 
"Giles, I'm going to go for another walk. Don't wait up."

Xander leans forward and mumbles to the Watcher. "Can you lock the 
door?"

"I heard that!"

I am really, really tired.

Buffy pulls me to my feet and I can't help but stare at her..she's so 
lovely and I've told her how I really feel..and it might not be 
returned..not now, maybe not ever...but that's okay?as my sisters
told 
me..it's better this way and I think they're right.

"C'mon Willow." Buffy says. "Let's go home, I'll keep the nightmares 
away."

"Yes." I say. "You will."

And she does.