Fic: Rough Magic (7/?)

[inell@xxxxxxx]

Title: Rough Magic
Author: Inell
Email: Inell@xxxxxxx
Disclaimer: Joss owns them all
Distribution: My site, Kiss or Kill, 
http://members.fortunecity.com/kissorkill Anyone that has permission, take. 
Otherwise, just ask.
Rating: R
Pairing: Willow/Buffy
Feedback might prevent me from throwing my laptop out the window. Grrr.
To anyone that hasn't forgotten me.


ROUGH MAGIC (7/?)


Buffy watched Xander hugging Willow and realized that the redhead had been 
right. Xander needed her. She stood there for several minutes watching as her 
two friends stood silently, hugging as Xander cried. The friendship between 
the two was nearly visible during that time. She had to admit that she almost 
felt left out. Almost, but not quite. There was history between Xander and 
Willow that had started long before she had arrived in Sunnydale. She 
couldn't feel jealous of a bond that had existed when she'd still been a 
silly cheerleader in LA. Instead of feeling left out, she began to realize 
what an honor it was that these two remarkable, special people had opened up 
their hearts and their lives and allowed her a place. She'd never really 
known true friendship until meeting Xander and Willow. Now, she was 
witnessing it.


Willow was the one to pull back first, her green eyes finding Xander's teary 
brown eyes. She used her thumb to wipe away a tear as she asked softly, "How 
is Anya?"


Xander nodded, giving her a small smile as he said, "She's going to be okay. 
She's asleep now, but the doctors said she'll be fine."


"Thank God," Willow whispered, having feared the worst despite Giles' earlier 
assurances. She felt Buffy's hand on her back, relaxing slightly as the 
slayer began to move her fingers in a comforting circular pattern.


"The baby didn't make it, Will," Xander said quietly, watching as she 
flinched, her eyes closing before they opened filled with guilt. 


"Giles told me," Willow said softly, saying, "I'm so sorry, Xander. I'm so 
sorry."


"It wasn't your fault," he said, taking her hand and moving her to sit down 
where he had been sitting. He paid no attention to the spilled coffee, 
finding that he just needed to sit for a while. 


"Yes, it was," Willow said softly, leaning over and resting her head on his 
shoulder. It was all her fault. It had been her spell, her responsibility to 
ensure that everything went off perfectly. Now, because of her, Tara and 
Xander's baby were dead and Anya was laying in a hospital bed. 


"Willow, stop," he said sharply, causing her to look at him in surprise. "It 
wasn't your fault. I don't what happened, but it happened. Maybe it was meant 
to happen. Who knows? We probably will never know. All I know is that Anya is 
alive, that I didn't lose her," remembering suddenly about Tara, he looked 
down, "I'm sorry. I forgot about Tara. Oh, God, honey, are you okay?"


"I'm better," is all Willow said, knowing that, despite his claims that it 
had just happened, she had been in charge of the spell. She had to have done 
something wrong, made some mistake. 


"Will, you want something to drink?" Buffy asked softly, after Willow and 
Xander had been silent for a few minutes.


"Not really, but thanks," Willow said, giving Buffy a fragile smile. This had 
been, by far, the worst night of her life, but it would have been far worse 
if she hadn't had Buffy with her. She honestly didn't think she could have 
made it without her best friend. She got to her feet, running a hand over her 
face and feeling the wetness from earlier tears. She sighed, saying, "I'm 
going to go to the bathroom, wash my face."


Xander waited until she had turned the corner before asking Buffy, "How is 
she, really?"



Buffy shrugged, "I honestly don't know. She was in shock, at first. Couldn't 
accept that Tara was dead. After she finally realized that it wasn't just a 
bad dream, her first thought was for you. I know she's blaming herself, I can 
see how badly she's hurting. I do see improvement, from how she was a few 
hours ago. She scared me, then, Xan. She seemed so lost, I've never felt so 
powerless, so scared. I knew that I couldn't lose her, but I didn't know how 
to help her. I still don't know what to do."


"Just be there for her, Buff," Xander said, giving her other best friend a 
smile. "She's going to need you. I'm going to go check on Anya, see if she's 
awake yet. I'll be right back."


Buffy nodded, leaning back in the chair as she waited for Willow and Xander, 
lost in her thoughts as she tried to figure out the next step to take.



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