RE: FIC: The Spaces Inbetween (4/?) NC-17

["TheBear!" <thebear@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

Are you kidding?! Not like Tara?
Have you read the promise series? I love Tara, and really love
Buffy/Tara and especially Buffy/Willow/Tara!
Great stuff, keep it up!

TheBear!
thebear@xxxxxxxxxxxxx 
http://thebear.somewhere.net 


-----Original Message-----
From: Red Willow [mailto:reddwillow@xxxxxxxxxxx] 
Sent: Friday, June 28, 2002 8:44 AM
To: buffywantswillow@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: FIC: The Spaces Inbetween (4/?) NC-17


Okay... there's quick note..... at the end of the story... so keep
reading 
when you're done... k?

Title: The Spaces Inbetween
Author: Red Willow
Email: reddwillow@xxxxxxxxxxx or nick_elodian@xxxxxxxxx
Disclaimer: All characters and reference to belong to Joss Whedon,
Mutant
Enemy, and all them
other peeps. I'm just using them to make my own fun. The story belongs
solely to me though. If you want it post or distribute somewhere, please
do
so only with permission from and credit to me. So just ask <G>
Also, if you don't like two chicks together (or 3 or 4...) then why are
you
reading this?
Claire and Casey are all mine though. :-)
Pairing: W/B with a tad of T and a smidge of S
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Part 4 of ?. Takes place during S6, veering off into AU land...
Tara's left Willow, Willow's fighting magick addiction, Buffy's been
boffing
Spike. Dawn's around... The spaces inbetween
refer to the time between when a relationship ends and a new one
begins....
between the fight and
the makeup... reflection time, dream time... alone time... etc.
Feedback? I thrive on feedback. Hope you enjoy!

Ok... and my bad, total forgetfullness on my part with the not crediting
of 
the song in part 3... so, i'll do it here since i must credit another...
Part 3's song was 'It's Been Awhile' written and performed by Staind.
It's 
off the Break the Cycle Cd, 2001.
Part 4's song is 'Enjoy' written and performed by Bjork. It's off the
Post 
Cd,1995.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

There was an awkward silence around us as we stood there, the moths
flying 
around and bouncing off of the porch light. I wasn't sure how she'd
respond 
to my actions, but I couldn't resist.

"Well, did you wanna.?" She made another gesture for me to come
in, but I 
had other plans.
"Oh! Oh no. I was just on my way. to a friends house."
"Oh, well. ok." she said, stepping back from the entranceway, ready to
close 
the door.
"Hey Buffy?"
"Yeah?"
"Um. are you. ok?"
"Huh? Uh! I mean, uh, yeah. yeah sure. Why?
"Oh w-well, I just meant. with the whole Spike thing." I gave her a 
sympathetic look. I really was concerned about how the situation with
Spike 
was going. I knew she was struggling with it.
"Oh. that. Um, yeah, well ya know. dealing."

I gave her what I thought might be a reassuring smile before leaning
closer 
to her and saying,
"Call me. i-if you want to. uh, need to. talk." I meant it, but in so
many 
other ways too. I wished I could just be bold with her, be bold with
all of 
them. I was so damn shy though; I couldn't help it. There are all
these 
thoughts floating around in my head and then I open my mouth and I spit
and 
sputter until I sound like an idiot, and then I just can't say anything.

"Thanks Tara." Buffy said, giving me a wide smile before closing the
door.
I stood on the porch a moment, trying to decide whether or not to knock 
again and this time take Buffy up on that offer to come inside. I
sighed 
and walked back to the car where my two newly acquired friends from the
glbt 
group on campus, Casey and Claire, were waiting for me.

I got in the back seat of the car and leaned forward, resting my head on

Claire's shoulder where I savored the sweet smell of her apple blossom 
shampoo.
"Was that her?" She asked, turning her head to look at me.
"Yeah."
"You're right," Started Casey, "She's hot."
I smiled shyly. Casey and Claire were definitely not shy like me, which
I 
liked. They were bold with their statements and didn't care what people

thought of them, as I often did.
"Yeah, I can really see it." Claire started, "I'd do her." She smiled
back 
and me and winked.
"W-well, unfortunately, I-I still don't think she goes for girls."
"Well have you asked?" Casey eyed me in the rearview after pulling out
into 
the street.
"No. of course not."
"So how are you going to know?"
"Yeah Tar. I told you, you just have to be bold sometimes." Agreed
Claire. 
She was holding a slushie in her hands and started sucking on the straw,

bringing the red liquid into her mouth.
"I-I. you guys know I can't."
"Well maybe you should ask Willow about it." offered Casey, raising an 
eyebrow at me in the rearview.

My mouth fell open. Was she serious? She didn't honestly believe that
I'd 
ever get up the nerve to ask Willow. She'd flip. She'd be hurt and angry
and 
probably throw me out, or throw something at me. I didn't want to be in
a 
relationship with her anymore, but I still wanted to be friends,
eventually. 
Besides, I had gotten to know Buffy these last two years and I was
pretty 
sure there were never any girls in her past, or going to be any in the
near 
future.

Not only that, but I was pretty sure if Willow did know different, that
she 
would have mentioned it to me at some point. Plus, there's the whole
Buffy 
freaking out when Will told her about us thing. Some of that was Spike 
playing them off each other, but Will did have serious concerns about
it. 
No, I was almost definite that Buffy was permanently in guyville and
would 
not be heading my way anytime soon. Hell, she probably wouldn't give me
the 
time of day even if she did bat for both sides.

"I don't think so." I sat back and crossed my arms.
"But you want her, don't you sweetie?" asked Claire. She had turned to
face 
me, putting her hand on my knee.

I couldn't meet her eyes.

"Uh. w-well." I started, but was reduced to simply nodding.
"Maybe we should just make it happen."
Claire and I just looked at Casey as if she'd grown another head. "Huh?"
"Well. I mean come on. You wouldn't have to do a love spell or
anything, 
just like."

"No!" I shouted, sitting up, my head right beside Casey's.
"There is no 
way. I told you about all the crap I had to put up with w-when I was
with 
W-willow and I won't use magicks on Buffy."
Casey looked hurt and a bit shocked that I had been so vehement.
Neither of 
them had really seen me mad. That was the only time I seemed to be able
to 
throw off my shy demeanor.

"Sorry Tara. I just thought." Casey shook her head. "I'm sorry.
I didn't 
mean."
"Let's just leave it alone guys." I told them, leaning back
again.
"Listen Tara, Casey isn't very smart sometimes-"
"Hey!" shouted Casey, offended.
Claire chuckled and patted Casey on the shoulder.
"But she means well. don'tcha?"
"Bite me." growled Casey, trying to hide a smile from creeping
around the 
corners of her mouth.
"I-I know." I said smiling. "But I can't use magick like that."
"Well, maybe you don't have to use magick."

I just looked at her questioningly. I knew she might be
developing some 
sort of a plan. She smiled, winked, and turned back around to face
front. I 
wondered what she could possibly mean. I did want Buffy. Badly, in
fact. 
Part of the reason I left Willow was because of my increasing feelings
for 
Buffy after we brought her back. I was lusting after her in ways that
made 
me blush, and on more than one occasion I caught myself openly watching
her, 
my eyes roaming over those strong smooth legs, her chest rising and
falling, 
her lips moving as she spoke. Living in the same house with my
girlfriend, 
who I cared for immensely, still do, and lusting after her best friend, 
who's house it was we were actually living in. the whole situation did
not 
make for anything of the good.

I lay my head on the headrest and looked out the window, knowing
the ride 
to Casey's, where we had planned on hanging out for the night, would be 
awhile since she didn't live in Sunnydale. Claire popped in a Bjork Cd
and 
turned up the volume. Good choice, I loved this cd.
"Ooh. gotta listen to my fave first." stated Casey, hitting the
seek button 
for the proper track.
"Ooh yeah!" Agreed Claire, "this song makes me horny!" She
laughed and 
looked back at me, winking as the song began. I grinned back before
closing 
my eyes and grooving to the tunes.

I wish I'd only look
a-and didn't have to touch
I wish I'd only smell this
a-and didn't have to taste

how can I ignore
this is sex without touching
I'm going to explore
I'm only into this to

enjoy. enjoy. ohh. enjoy. enjoy.

The song made me think of my latest fantasy with Buffy. Not so much the 
lyrics, but the beat. The drums, rhythm, almost like having sex, when I
got 
into it, my heart would start to pound just a bit harder, by breath
would 
quicken. This was one of the Cds Willow and I would listen to during
our 
lovemaking sessions that often stretched out the entire night. I have
to 
admit, when it came to sex, Willow and I sure connected. It was Buffy I

often thought of these days though. Buffy, naked in my arms, under me,
on 
top of me, Buffy's golden locks, tanned skin, Buffy, her body stretched
out 
in front of me, against the wall, Buffy.


standing in front of me, moving slowly, swaying her hips to a silent
tune, 
her arms stretching towards me, inviting me, welcoming me.

I go to her, shyly, as always, my feet deep in wet grass and I realize
we're 
outside at dawn, the sun just under the horizon, throwing light into the

deep blue of the night sky. Her arms are warm, soft, and there's the
sweet 
smell of vanilla and spices and something else, something Buffy. I find 
myself sliding my hands down her sides; our faces close, sharing the air
we 
breathe. Our lips touch gently, break away and go back for another swift

brush of softness before breaking away yet again. She presses her cheek 
against mine as our hands meet and we entwine our fingers.

We stand like this for a few moments, neither of us speaking, or moving,

just close. Then, all of a sudden I feel her break away and I fear I've
lost 
her until she slides her hands up the sides of my neck, her fingers
tight 
under my ear, and my face close to her. She assaults my lips then,
tasting 
them, opening them with her tongue before exploring my mouth. I open 
willingly to her, wrapping my arms around her waist and feeling my way
up 
her back. We kiss deeply, passionately, tasting each other. Cherries and

mango and mint combine to make the most luscious taste between us and I
feel 
my knees go weak with want.
We fall to our knees, groping, clinging, kissing and sucking, melding
into 
each other. Distantly I hear birds, feel the sun begin to warm the
ground 
while our burning bodies lay out on the grass, clothes melting away to 
tingling hot flesh. Fingers on rosy erect nipples, grazing stomachs and

thighs. Mouths and tongues exploring breasts, ears, and necks, searching
and 
finding and searching again.

Her moans fill my ears, soft at first, then throaty, urging,
wanting, 
demanding and surrounding as I descend the length of her body. The scent
of 
her wet sex invading my nostrils, sending ripples of need to my own 
throbbing center. Her thigh is a sheet of muscle, yet soft, smooth and
I 
lay my cheek against the inner most part, inhaling deeply as I eye the 
glistening drops of her juice clinging to soft her soft curls.
"I want you so bad Tara." she tells me, wrapping her fingers in
my hair as 
I bring my face, my mouth, my tongue closer to those shiny wet curls,
those 
swollen lips.

"Oh yes Tara. yes yes, Tara. oh Tara. Tara."


"Tara."
"Tara!"
"Huh?"
I sit up, opening my eyes, blinking at the bright lights
flooding in 
through the car windows.
"Were ya sleeping?" asked Claire.
"Oh.. uh, yeah I-I uh, I guess I w-was."
"I'm going in, do you want anything?" asked Casey, leaning back
into the 
car.
I looked out the window and realized we had stopped to get gas
and Casey 
must have just finished pumping it.
"Oh. uh. um. No, I-I'll go in too." I said, opening my door. "I
think I 
have to u-use the bathroom."

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++



first off, DON'T HATE ME.... i know you guys are expecting B/W goodness
and 
it's coming i swear.... i also know that some of you don't like Tara
and 
that's fine... but this is my story so too bad! :-P
I felt like i kind of had to put this part in here... i'm working on the

next and you guys should get it in a few days... promise, and i promise
all 
good things come to those that wait.. there are some surprises in
store... 
so you'll just have to bear with me... ;-)


"What is a poet? An unhappy person who conceals profound
anguish in his heart but whose lips are so formed that
as sighs and cries pass over them they sound like
beautiful music"
-Soren Kierkegaard


Willow: Oh Buffy, you really need to have every square inch of your ass 
kicked.
Buffy: Then show me what you got, and I'll show you what a Slayer really
is.

Who the hell am *i* to capitalize myself?


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