FIC: Hopes, Dreams, and Answers 1/?

["life_in_the_er" <Waterskier2004@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

No Title


Pairing: Buffy/ Willow, it is Buffy wants Willow isn't it?

Description: Entries from Willow's and Buffy's journals,
including 
flashbacks.


I DON'T OWN ANY OF THE FOLLOWING CHARACTERS, THEY BELONG TO JOSS 
WHEDON AND UPN.

I tried to get my italics and stuff to work but I am not sure how, if 
anyone could email me and explain how I would greatly appreciate it. 
Thanks. Waterskier2004@xxxxxxxxxxx

**********************************************************
I was sitting in the library staring at my notebook attempting to 
finish my BC Calculus homework. Now that I think about it I am not so 
sure I was looking at my notebook as opposed to through it. I recall 
being lost in thoughts I was only beginning to understand. They had 
me extremely confused because I didn't think I should have been 
having them, yet there I was having them. Me, confused, now
there's a 
concept.

***********************************************************    

"Hey Will," I remember hearing. I looked up to see my best
friend 
walking over.

"Hey." I replied before returning my gaze to my notebook.

"What's the up?" she asked me while sitting down at the
opposite end 
of the desk.

"Um, the sky." I retorted without even looking up.

"Okay, you're reverting to the use of sarcasm, the number one
sign 
something is wrong. So, what is it?" 

"Nothing"

"Something"

"Really, it's nothing, don't worry about it."

"Okay, well now I am definitely going to worry about it, but I
have 
to get back to class before Mr. I Know Everything comes looking for 
me, I just had to ask Giles a question, but he isn't here."

"You're in psych now?"

"Yeah unfortunately, I didn't think I would have to take it,
yet here 
I am senior year, stuck in psych class."

"Okay, I'll catch you later."

"Yeah, I'll see you at lunch."

***********************************************************   

She was walking away as she said this. I returned my attention to my 
calculus, knowing I would not be able to do it. Not because I
hadn't 
understood it, but the lack of concentration I had. I looked up and 
watched as she walked down the hallway, her perfectly blond locks 
hanging around her shoulders. She disappeared into the room where her 
class was and I was once again bale to concentrate, well somewhat 
concentrate anyway. The bell for the end of study hall rang and I 
gathered up my books and headed off toward my next class. We had a 
test but I thought I might still see Buffy.

***********************************************************    

My next class had been Physics and we had a huge chapter test. Miss 
Sauderhouse handed out the tests, and I wrote my name as usual. The 
next thing I knew the bell was ringing, and all I had managed to do 
was put my name on the paper, not even my full name mind you. My test 
read "Buf." As the rest of the class headed out I scrambled
to write 
something down, knowing full well it was no use, I was doomed. I 
turned the test in, and hurried for the door hoping to escape the 
questioning that was sure to come. 

"Buffy?" I turned around knowing I had explaining to do.

"Yeah?" I said trying to sound cheery. 

"I may not be a psychiatrist but I am pretty sure I can tell when 
something is wrong."

"What do you mean?" Playing stupid has always been one of my
strong 
point, not that it is always "playing."

"Buffy, you are one of the best students in this course, so when
a 
major test comes up and you sit the whole time staring into space, it 
leads me to believe something is wrong."

"You noticed?"

"Yeah, I think almost everyone did, especially Willow. I should
not 
be discussing this with you." She returned her gaze to the stack
of 
tests in her hands.

"Discussing what with me?"

"Well, Willow."

"What about Will?" I asked as a picture of my perfect red
headed best 
friend flashed through my mind. Mine? Possesive much Buffy? 

"Well she didn't do so well on the test either, I mean she
passed, as 
always, but she seemed distracted."

"By what?"

"You"

"Me?" I asked.

"What do you mean? I mean how could you tell it was me?"

"Well she kept staring over at you..can't say I am surprised
you 
didn't notice, but she looked?" her voice trailed off.

"Looked what?" I asked, surprised by the tone of urgency my
voice had 
taken on, I think it surprised her too.

"Well, she looked worried."

"Okay, well I'll talk to her now since it's lunch, so I
better go or 
I won't have time." I turned and headed for the door. I was
almost 
out in the hall when I heard Miss Sauderhouse again.

"Buffy?"

"Yeah?"

"Good luck." She said with a coy smile on her face.

"Um?thanks?I think." What do I need luck for talking
to my best 
friend? I dismissed the thought and headed off to find Willow. After 
checking the cafeteria and not finding her I looked in the library 
and found her working on something. Willow in the library now
there's 
a shocker. I walked up behind her and that's when I saw it?