Re: Re: Seduction of a Slayer ch.1 W/B NC17 SPOILER ALERT!!!!!

[Red <vampred5@xxxxxxxxx>]

Sorry about the spacing, but that's the way my beta wants it. Never had any complaints before, but everybody's diff, right? As for creedent, I kinda have my own little language. If you keep reading my work, you will catch on to that. Just part of who I am & how I write. Reposted DEAR CORDELIA. Thanks for the feed. Take care.
blinviz <debvii@xxxxxxxxx> wrote: --- In buffywantswillow@y..., "vampred5" <vampred5@y...> wrote:

> Summary: A sequel to Dear Cordelia. Willow, in her end of season 6 
> badness, has decided to make Buffy hers.

I don't know this story "Dear, Cordelia" so I'm a little lost, but this 
seems a promising start.


> The memory of the creedent who used her Buffy drifted 

Should this have been "miscreant"?

> " Willow, " she began, her voice calm. " We can talk about this. "

I'd recommend against those spaces between the text and the quotation 
marks. It makes it hard to follow the dialogue, esp. when they come 
near the end of a line and break off from the text that they surround. 


> She was shut up with a hard kiss from Willow.

Yes, very promising indeed.



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Leaving Now,

Red 

www.geocities.com/wanttakehavelove

Proud member of the BtVS Writer's Guild: Because fan fiction makes anything possible.



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