FIC: The World Has Teeth 1/?

["xenarip13" <xenarip13@xxxxxxxxx>]

Title: The world has teeth
Author: Bynx
Email: xenarip13@xxxxxxxxx
Spoilers: some for the new season
Rating: unsure yet..depends on where it goes
Disclaimers: Joss owns I borrow and make no money.
Warnings: I am just on a binge here lately and not sure what is 
going to come out.


The World Has Teeth

Buffy, 

I'm sitting here. I felt it and it scared me so I am writing to 
you. I told Giles the world has teeth and it does. I am trying to 
think of what to say. I would ask you, but I am afraid I wouldn't 
get an answer. I am still powerful. I guess it is just in me now. 
People, even this powerful coven, are afraid of me. I'm afraid of 
me. I sit here and none of that matters as much to me as you being 
afraid of me. Are you? I know you were afraid, but was it of me? 
If you were or are, I understand. You shouldn't deny it, because I 
could feel the world even you..especially you. How do I say I'm 
sorry to you? How could it ever be enough? Two words...they don't 
convey..coudln't show you how much I feel. I need you to forgive me, 
but how do I ask you for that? How can I? What right do I have? I 
miss you. Hmmm..three words..words will never express or be able to 
make you understand all that I have done and my guilt. You said good 
bye to me. You actually came to see me off, but I could still sense 
your fear and your pain. I told Giles I only want to be Willow 
again. He says I am still her, but will you still see Willow when 
you look at me? Oh, the world has teeth..sharp teeth and they are 
chewing me. I'm thousands of miles away from the hell mouth, but I 
can feel it trying to swallow you and it chews me up along with the 
guilt. Guilt..one word doesn't cover all I have done and I don't 
just mean recently. Yes, I tried to kill all of you, tried to end 
the world, flayed Warren alive and I am guilty..but I've done more 
and perhaps worse. I led an innocent, loving woman to her grave as 
surely as if I pulled the trigger that fired the bullet which killed 
her. You'll say I didn't, but you don't know. I have so much to ask 
forgiveness for. I loved her. I truly did. I can't put her name 
here. I no longer have that right. I hope she forgives me where she 
is. She knew all along, but was still content to love me and always 
be second. She told me once.."How could I not know love? It's the 
way you look at her..in the way you help her, and you just had to 
have her back..I know you love her, but I also know you choose to be 
here loving me..it's okay. I understand." She told me that and 
loved me anyway inpite of the fact taht she had to share my heart. 
What a generous, loving soul she was, but you know that. She was 
there for you when I wasn't..couldn't be. You're more confused now 
maybe? Well, she knew that you were my true love and she accepted 
that. I have loved you from the beginning practically. I don't 
remember not loving you. I didn't deserve her, none of us did and 
she was killed. I could have..no..I should have let her go, but I 
didn't and now she's gone. Do you think she will forgive me? She 
probably already has. Will you? Can you? I tell you I love 
you..always have and only after I try to everyone, even you. Oh yes, 
the world has teeth and they are razor sharp. I want to be Willow 
with no power, no shame, no guilt, but that will never be. I want to 
see you look at me and feel that you are still my best friend. I 
fear, especially given my full confession, that will never be. What 
more should I say? Anything? Did you even want to hear from me? 
Probably not. Giles is so wonderful and Xander..well, we know he 
saved us all don't we. However, he is still just Xander. He loves 
me even though I don't deserve it. Dawn hugged me good bye..she's so 
grown up. How did I miss that? You, though, are who matters. I 
don't try as hard as they want me to here. They know that, can sense 
it. Giles does too.He confronted me, but at the time I avoided 
answering. I know he knows now. He wants to bring me home. He says 
if I can feel the hellmouthy danger than there is a reason. So, I'm 
writing this becuase I won't come if you say no. I give you the 
power. I don't want it..one word..Power..You can say no and I'll 
stay away forever, but if you want I'll beg. I would do anything, 
but how could you possibly forgive me?

Yours, 
Willow



It had been a couple of weeks since she had sent that letter. She 
sits in her room as slowly there is a knock and it opens revealing 
Giles.

"She received your letter today."

What did she say to you?" Willow doesn't look at up waiting for her 
punishment.

"Here, Willow. It's for you." Giles hands her a cordless phone.

"Hello?" Willow whispers.

"Willow?"

"B-buffy?" her hands begin to tremble.

"I.." the slayer clears her throat, "I have one word for you Willow, 
and you will always be Willow to me. The one word is an answer to 
your final question of your letter..it's love..I love you..I need you 
here, Wills..come home. You are always forgiven..we'll work 
together..I love you..come home."

Willow lets loose a heart wrenching sob at Buffy's forgiving tone. 
She shakily hands the phone to Giles unable to say another word. She 
sobs out her relief. She knows she doesn't deserve it, but she's 
been forgiven.

"Willow?!" Comes The slayer's voice.

"Buffy?"

"Giles, is she alright?!" she panics.

"Yes,..yes, she's fine..she is over joyed I believe." Giles voice 
begins to crack with emotion.

"Bring her home to us, Giles..home to me..I..we..need her...if she's 
able.." 

"We'll leave tonight. It will be hard, but we'll be there for 
her..so glad you called Buffy..she needs..well..you."

"She's right, Giles..the world has teeth and it has been eating me 
alive without her..see you both tomorrow..tell her.." Buffy's voice 
breaks.

"you love her..I will. Good night, Buffy."

TBC...I may have an epic on my hands here..what do you think?