Re: Re: Pop Psychology and B/W

[danspector@xxxxxxxxx]

Well, I suppose I shouldn't preempt Christine too much, but let me offer
an initial rebuttal (because, the Gopher did ask, y'know..)

While a few authors have used B/W as a background for BDSM tales, I'd
hardly call that the primary attraction of the 'ship.  Certainly, almost
nothing in canon supports a power/dominance interpretation of the
friendship, and the fact that B/W BDSM fics have been written doesn't
mean that that's what the characters are all about.  (Since I'm pretty
sure that such fics have been written for virtually **all** possible
pairings.)

While I'm no expert on such things (and in fact tend to run from such
ficswhich, btw, is something I seem to have in common with a good
part of the B/W fandom and, I suppose, that's a partial refutation in
and of itself), I believe that someone like The Bear might argue that
B/W are able to experience the "freedom" of submission **because** their
relationship is about trust and commonality, rather than power.  (Ursine
one, feel free to swat me on this, if I've got it wrong.)

For me, the attraction is precisely because it's not about
dominanceB/W fill each other's needs, make each other stronger.  They
fit like two puzzle pieces, as opposed to the clashing alphas of
Buffy/Faith, for example, or the destruction of Buffy's heroic nature so
she can be the weak female in need of her Big Strong Man, be it Angel or
Riley or America's Favorite Rapist.   (Okay, so St. Sunkencheeks isn't
exactly "big", but still...)  Indeed, one of my big thrills is what I
call "the unibrain" in action, when the two appear to be on the same
frequency, be it talking together in "Teacher's Pet" or scolding Xander
in "School Hard" or slumping together in "Bad Eggs".  DEM/blinviz has
also said how much she likes seeing this, and since she's a psychologist
herself...well, maybe I ought to let the professional make with the
professional analysis, should she so choose.

I'll just say that when I had my "lightbulb moment" (ie, realized that
B/W belonged together), the way I thought about was "they need each
other!", which really doesn't sound like a dominance/power struggle to
me.  I consider B/W right for Buffy precisely because it is the
strongest, most loving relationship she's had (well, S1-4 [pre-Dawn
spell/monk mind control, that is] anyway) and the last thing I want to
see in it is "see who lands on top".

Dan

firm fan of hugs and puppies


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                     'Choices'

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