Re: Fic: Totally Snowed (Christmas Theme) B/W PG13

["jin_hayte" <jinhayte@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

--- In buffywantswillow@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx, Silverna <silvernawolfe@y...>
wrote:
> > Still, this heavy usage of talking heads (that's the
> > last time I say
> > it, I swear) is always - ALWAYS - bad. Stories have
> > been ruined
> > because of them.
>
> Thanks for the comments Jin. Help me out here so I get
> this right next time...talking heads means dialogue
> back and forth without appropriate 'saids' and
> emotions? 
yup, that's pretty much it


> Or do you just mean too much talking with
> nothing in between? What's a good way to layout long
> conversations?
it depends on what you wanna do, really. I personally like the usual
she 'said/sighed/nodded/smiled/winked/whatever' and then with the
occasional action after that, like 'and scooted closer to me/waved her
hand in the air/brushed her hair behind her ears/whatever'. it keeps
the pace of the dialogue quick enough to seem natural while also
giving you a clear enough image of what the characters are doing.
the downside to using this is that all the shes and saids can get
redundant, which means you not only have to switch around the verbs,
you gotta mix up the pronouns as well. which will get on your - the
writer's - nerves after a while when you run out of appropriate
substitues for witch/slayer/redhead/blonde/girl/woman/etc
On the plus side, when you feel you're being redundant, you CAN sneak
in one or two talking heads (for example: after a simple "Yes." it's
just annoying to have another 'she said')

some people like this formula:

[short piece of dialogue] and then [word after word of endless
descriptions and thoughts that end up boring the hell out of the
reader and inevitably makes the point of the dialogue disappear into
thin air]

they both have their advantages - again, depending on what you want to
do - but I'm heavily biased towards the first one

> Headsup to me,
> Silverna
>
>
> 		
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Willow: "It's a good fight, Buffy, and I want in."
Buffy:  "I kinda love you."
                     'Choices'

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